from http://bangkokgirls.wordpress.com/

"Let me preface this story with the fact that IтАЩm not much of a fighter. Maybe 4 real fights in my life and one of those was with my brother and another with a best friend. So hereтАЩs the story:

Today I had some things to pick up at Panthip. I go down the escalator at the Rachatewee BTS station and approach the moto-boys there. One asks where iтАЩm going and I tell him Panthip Plaza. He looks me in the eye and says 40 bt. I look at the sign hanging 1 foot over his head indicating that the fixed price to Panthip is 20 bt. So I smile and tell him 20 baht. He frowns and says 40. I smile, point at the sign and say 20. He gets really irritated, yells тАЬ40 btтАЭ, turns his back and stalks back over to his lounge chair.

Now IтАЩve taken this little trip at least 50 times and always pay 20 bt. Moreover, while I was standing there haggling with this joker, two other Thai people got rides from other moto-taxi guys at the stand and were quoted 20 bt.

So now IтАЩm getting annoyed. IтАЩm wearing long pants, long shirt, tie, and canтАЩt be arsed walking the 800 m to the plaza - itтАЩs midday, hot and humid. I donтАЩt like being cheated, and IтАЩm becoming indignant and hereтАЩs where things get interesting.

I point to the sign again and say тАЬ20 btтАЭ. He responds by turning his chair around so his back was facing me. This freaking irritated me so I responded loudly with: тАЬYet KhunтАЭ. Obviously this is not the nicest or wisest thing to say, but whatever.

So he jumps up out of his chair, runs over, and empties a 1 liter bottle of water in my face, and on my dress shirt, tie, and pants. He sees that IтАЩm quite pissed now and runs off to a distance of about 10 m. So I take a couple of steps in his direction and he runs around to the other side of the escalator - the cowardly little prick. Things might have ended there. I was pissed off but willing to get on with my business. I start to walk away.

But then he shouts something unintelligable - but obviously offensive. So I turn back, thump my chest, and give him a тАШcome on thenтАЩ sort of gesture. He retreats a couple more meters, picks up a 2.5 m tent pole, and charges at me like some kind of modern day Don Quixote. The image is so comical that I nearly burst out laughing but there he is running at full speed with his lance aimed at my stomach - so no time for laughing. I sidestep easily as the pole is far too long to be effective as any kind of weapon. He whirls around and cracks me on the back with the damn pole, and then again on the back of my legs. So I quickly take off my glasses, move in, and next thing you know we are grappling and rolling around the middle of Pahol Yothin like a couple of schoolboys. This is unbelievable. People who know me see me as kind a mild-mannered Clark Kent type.

So there we are in the street, heтАЩs got my head in some kind of grip and is twisting my neck, and frankly it hurt like hell. So I grabbed his hair with both hands, just behind the ears, and give him a nice head butt, but specifically not aimed at his nose - i didnтАЩt want want to hurt the guy too much for fear of legal troubles. It was at about this time that a couple of shop merchants run over with a couple of moto-boys and break things up. All are smiling and saying jai yen yen and calming the situation down.

I look down - my 1000 Bt dress shirt is torn at the elbow. My 6,000 Bt glasses are bent all to hell. The plastic case for my mobile phone is shattered. My new, $150, worn one day, black leather shoes just purchased in the states were totally scuffed up. As I begin to assess the damages IтАЩm not too thrilled. The numbers are adding up quickly in my head. At this time IтАЩm still flying on adrenaline so I donтАЩt really notice the blood on my hands and elbows and the red bump forming on my forehead from the head butt - heh. Luckily my new dress pants were relatively unscathed.

I tell the bystanders that this guy should compensate me for some of my damages. That obviously got me nowhere. So I walk up to the police box on the corner - about 30 meters up the street. The policeman was in the street directing traffic. From where he was standing IтАЩm sure he saw the whole damn thing. So I stand next to his box and try to get his attention. He sees me, but just ignores me. This goes on for a few mintutes, til finally, I shrug my shoulders and walk off.

I call my wife, and considered calling the tourist police, but in the end I just walked into a nearby optical shop, got my glasses fixed up, walked down to panthip, bought a fresh shirt and went about my business.

The End."

Thanks to Chop Kin Hoi http://thorntree.lonelyplanet.com/categ ... e=1#788845

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