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Thread: Arranging one's own funeral services & cremation...

  1. #1
    Forum's veteran travelerjim's Avatar
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    Arranging one's own funeral services & cremation...

    Hello Sawatdee Friends...

    The subject of "Arranging one's own funeral services & cremation" is currently being discussed on The Baht Stop board.
    Pardon me for copying the thread here...but I believe the topic is important...and been on my mind.

    http://www.baht-stop.com/forums/index.p ... topic=1361 .

    I have started same posting here because I believe it is of importance to many of us.

    This is a subject many of us have thought about or will be ...
    and now that I am in Thailand 90% or more each year...
    I have wondered what do I need to do to make sure my wishes are followed.

    I remember attending the funeral services of our beloved "David in Pattaya".
    He had both a Christian and Buddhist service - and both were held in the Wat Temple on So Pattaya Road.

    The first plan was for friends to go to a Christian Church in Pattaya for the Christian services...
    followed by all going to the Wat Temple for the Buddhist services.

    On reflection ...I remember freinds telling me that the Buddhist Monk said - in effect -
    "Why you do that? You are all invited to hold both services in our Wat Temple".

    So simple and solution ..and so respectful of David and his Friends...especially during the hot season.
    and a beautiful funeral rites - both Christian and Buddhist - were held in honor and memory of David.

    He was cremated in the Buddhist Crematorium and his ashes collected the following day by his bf
    and taken out and scattered over the sea the next day by his bf.

    I have told my family and friends back in the USA...and Thai friends here...
    I do not want to be brought back to the USA for burial or services.
    I wish to have a Christian service for my Christian friends..
    and A Buddhist Service followed by cremation - with my ashes spread across the sea by my bf.

    Hopefully my wishes will be followed....as to what I need to do "in writing" I guess is another topic...
    I do not as of yet have a Thai Will...and those are good in Courts and Probate ...much less for the funeral services...
    but I surmise it is the will of the friends ..and my bf ...to respect my wishes...
    and I trust that they will.

    Any suggestions - much appreciated.
    Thank you.

    TJ

    Tj

  2. #2
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    Make a will and appoint an executor, I have done so and appointed my solicitor as executor. Its the executors job to follow your will to the letter which can include mortal remains and funeral arrangements.

    In Britain a will is sacred unlike the USA where people can and often contest a will causing havoc. You must have a pretty good reason to contest a will in the UK and even then its difficult.

    I don't know where you are from TJ, if the USA you may have problems if Aussie it should be similar to the UK. look into it. Be sure to deposit the will with the solicitor and leave a copy with a trusted friend.

    I live outside the UK and when British people have died here its the job of the Brit embassy or Consulate to receive the death cert and open a file.T he body goes nowhere until next of kin are located and the presence of a will is established. I paid a small consular fee to have the Bitish Consulate witness and stamp my will.
    Don't try to hold in farts - they travel up your spine and into your brain and that is where shitty ideas come from.

  3. #3
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    Yep ...

    Quote Originally Posted by allieb
    Make a will and appoint an executor, I have done so and appointed my solicitor as executor. Its the executors job to follow your will to the letter which can include mortal remains and funeral arrangements.

    In Britain a will is sacred unlike the USA where people can and often contest a will causing havoc. You must have a pretty good reason to contest a will in the UK and even then its difficult.

    I don't know where you are from TJ, if the USA you may have problems if Aussie it should be similar to the UK. look into it. Be sure to deposit the will with the solicitor and leave a copy with a trusted friend.

    I live outside the UK and when British people have died here its the job of the Brit embassy or Consulate to receive the death cert and open a file.T he body goes nowhere until next of kin are located and the presence of a will is established. I paid a small consular fee to have the Bitish Consulate witness and stamp my will.
    Yes, that's exactly the only resonable way how to do it. If you live in Pattaya, you might even be able to contact the Consular official direct locally, which could spare you a trip to Bangkok.

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    Quote Originally Posted by wx40afp
    it says i am also the trustee whatever that means?
    It means there is one misguided person that trusts you.

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    Re: Arranging one's own funeral services & cremation...

    Quote Originally Posted by travelerjim
    The subject of "Arranging one's own funeral services & cremation" is currently being discussed on The Baht Stop board.
    Pardon me for copying the thread here...but I believe the topic is important...and been on my mind.

    I have started same posting here because I believe it is of importance to many of us.

    This is a subject many of us have thought about or will be ...
    I have wondered what do I need to do to make sure my wishes are followed.
    Worthwhile thread, Jim. I apreciated that you "moved" the topic here as a fresh start. I rarely make time to read other boards.

    Funerals, memorial services and the likes are for the comfort of the ones we leave behind. The business of wills, trusts, estates and the likes serve a dual purpose: our own peace of mind while we're alive and - much more importantly - the benefit of those we care about who survive us.

    Let's face it, more than likely we're not going to care OR be aware if we have a "meaningful memorial service" or if someone just drops a cassette into a boom box and plays a half hour of ABBA "B" sides. Those who genuinely care about us will remember us in their own way. Like I said in another thread the other day, my avatar photo here is of a spot where I bid farewell to a dear friend, and when I see it I think of them (and others already passed on).

    The best we can do is put something in writing and make sure it's stored securely, registered as necessary, tattoed on the small of your favorite num's back - whatever you feel is appropriate.

    For those in the US, if you own real property and investments worth protecting it's probably best to invest the couple of thousand dollars and have a lawyer write up a living trust. I'm told it saves an estimated 30% in estate and probate taxes and expenses. With the new domestic partner laws in California it can help the transfer of things a lot, also.

    The champions of layman's law NOLO Press has worked with the Quicken people and put out a software program called "WillMaker Plus". The 2007 version is available through Amazon and allows you to write your own forms up, if costs are a concern. Like I said, it's SOMEthing - and only you can judge if it's enough for you or not. Get the book, not the software package. The book includes the software and for some reason is a few dollars cheaper. Retail is $50, you can get it new for less than $35.

    My two satang...

    ...but oh, how I'd love to be a fly on the wall if and when BB Billy tells his mother what his plans are for her life savings! :cheers:

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    Re: Arranging one's own funeral services & cremation...

    5 years on since Jim posted this.

    I know my views have changed, I feel a lot more mortal and much nearer the end.

    Sadley or Gladly I do not expect to be in Thailand when my time comes.

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    Re: Arranging one's own funeral services & cremation...

    jinks thank you for locating and reactivating this thread
    My desire and hope for everyone is ever lasting peace no matter if our paths crossed or not and if they crossed in a kind or unkind way. That we each have a swift and painless end and that our wishes for what we want done at the end are respected.

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