Worst dud I ever got was an 18yo in Amsterdam - from the old Festival bar I think.
Once back at the hotel it was "I don't fuck, I don't get fucked, I don't suck, I don't touch you in any way, I don't kiss" and then when the very limited options left had commenced, he came out with the daddy of the lot "DON'T TOUCH MY HAIR"
I know some will condemn but I just paid him off to get rid of him - and then to cap it all he asked for a "tip" on top!
The tip I gave him was "get another fucking job as you're useless at this one"