Hi Wombat,
I understand completely your desire to be at home. I have recently returned to the USA from 8 years in Thailand and then Cambodia to live with my 99 year old father. He had caregivers during the day but needed someone there in the evening as his short term memory is very lacking at this point.
My sister was at wits-end after several wild events he had and his desire to still "control" all situations. So, I returned to stop her from starting the legal process to commit him and then put him forcibly in a facility. I don't blame her at all as our father is a narcissist on the level of Trump and a true pain-in-the-ass, lol.
The funny thing was, for the first time in my life, he was thankful......he has NEVER thanked me for anything before, lol.
Anyway, I hope you can accomplish your goal of staying in your home.