Amongst all the snobby chatter about 200GBP being run of the mill for a meal for two, I suspect the reality is that 50% of you are eating at Baywatch diner on Beach Road.

Another 35% are at the other side of BT - at the Boat diner, 10% are eating deep fried cockroaches from street stalls, and the final 5% are just snobs with more money than sense