Dodger's Trip Report

[Dodger]

Hi you maniacs.

I really hate it when I hear people say…”I had a great time but it’s sure nice to be home” Personally I can’t think of one single think that’s nice about it.

I just returned home from my routine 3 month stay in LaLa Land and still trying to shake off the jet lag from the tortuous 27 hour journey home. It seems to be more tortuous as time moves forward. I guess it’s an age thing.

I haven’t been reading the forum but I’m sure you’re all aware of the construction work going on at Jomtien Beach which is intended to provide a more modern beach front. From the posters they have displayed near the police box the new beachfront will resemble a concrete jungle with the ambiance of a Walmart parking lot. I guess the massage boys will have to start using air mattresses.

I think the gay scene in general has reached a point where it has started to stabilize after the drastic decline we have been witnessing for the past 7 years. At least that’s my impression based on the number of gay host bars, gogo bars, etc. which are still in business and the number of customers you see out on the scene at night. A dismal comparison to the past for sure – but I haven’t seen much change during the past two years which is a good thing. I only visited the bar scene a handful of times during my holiday and glad to see that the lights are still burning. For the first time visitor I’m sure they find the scene as vibrant and exciting as some of us veterans experienced in the good old days.

I spent most of my time completing the renovation of a second studio I purchased last year in Bang Saray. Managing a bunch of local Thai workers is like trying to manage a class room filled with children with special needs. Their technique for cutting an opening in a concrete wall to add French doors involved one guy who I swear was either drunk from the night before or mentally handicapped swinging a sledge hammer as hard as he could until the wall simply started to crumble. No precision measurements, no scribing of lines, no power saw with carbide blade – just an old sledge hammer and a piece pf cardboard intended to prevent the falling concrete from damaging the floor tiles. I handed one guy a center punch from my tool box after watching him bend nail after nail during his attempts to install floor molding – and another time when I handed a guy my hack saw for fear that he was going to cut his hand off trying to cut a piece of PVC with a rusty little pen knife. It was like watching the Flint Stones.

My boyfriend and I spent about 80% of our time in Bang Saray and 20% in Pattaya which was really a nice balance. After living in a one room studio in Pattaya for so many years - having two rooms in Bang Saray is like living in a castle. We love having a separate bedroom, and he enjoys cooking his Thai delicacies in a real kitchen. I plan to start cooking more myself one day after I retire – but right now I’m just too lazy to do the dishes.

We intentionally avoided Songkran this year by staying in Bang Saray from April 13 to April 19, and then returned to Pattaya on April 20 right after the sois were cleaned and the mayhem had ceased. I used to love Songkran, but as they say…been there – done that.

I have been riding a motorbike for the past 18 years in Thailand without a motorbike driver’s license. I attempted to get one years ago, failed the test, got pissed off, and never turned back. This time I decided to get one and it was like sitting in a dentist chair without any pain sedatives. They now require you to take a 5 hour video training course before taking the actual driving test and computer test. The computer test has a first time failure rate of about 90% due to the fact that the questions are intentionally subjective and sometimes conflict with the information provided in the video course. The only way I passed this was by buying the Driving Instruction Book (which of course is only available in Thai language) and having my boyfriend translate it for me which took hours. Fortunately I passed the test. I also renewed my car driver’s license which was really a simple process which only required an eye exam.

The Arabs were (and probably still are) in full swing during their post-Ramadan celebrations. I don’t know what’s worse, the sounds of their blazing motorbikes as they circle the sois like a bunch of Indians corralling buffalo, or the ugly Walking Street tramps dressed like clowns that they drag along with them. The Thais in general don’t like these types of visitors and the police are losing their patience. I witnessed two separate motorbike accidents involving Arabs last week on soi Yensabai within an hour of each other. I was sitting with friends at 2Guys Guest House enjoying (or trying to enjoy) breakfast amidst a hundred Arabs circling the sois and revving up their motorbikes which of course are equipped with illegal mufflers (85 decibels max in Thailand). Unfortunately, there were no serious injuries.

I enjoyed rubbing elbows with old friends i.e., Undaunted, Big Mike, John (2 Guys), Professor Roger, Dee from Chiang Rai, Bud from DC and many others and glad to see that some things just don’t change. We inevitably end up talking about the splendor of “the old days”, but in all reality, things are pretty good just the way they are. Jomtien Plaza has a hundred (or more) anxious boys (Thai, Cambodian, Laotian) looking for a hook up on any given night. That in-and-by-itself is something you won’t find anywhere else in the world.

I can’t really tell you anything different about the bar scene that you don’t already know. I’ve been perfectly content with the lifestyle I’ve enjoyed for the past 4 years with my partner and the practice of waking up with a hangover and an empty wallet has somehow lost its luster. I guess Thailand is changing and I’m changing right along with it…enjoying every moment…grateful for every day that I am there….and, as always, counting the days till my return.

Cheers

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