life post gogo bars...

[Dodger]

......yes i guess u know they were/are in it strictly for the money when they get married and have kids...

Of course, because that would only be natural for a "str8 boy" who's obviously working the scene stickily for the $$money$$, but for the "gay boys" working the scene can, and usually does, have many more motivating factors

As we all know, the money is certainly a huge magnet that attracts all the boys (str8 & gay) to the working scene - but for the gay boys it's also a chance to enjoy being in a society (or sub-community) with other like-minded gays where they can just be "themselves" (or invent themselves)... enjoy having sex other "males"...and possibility even hook a farang boyfriend if they're so inclined. Where a Str8 boy would have absolutely no interest whatsoever in the things I just mentioned.

If a punter only prefers hooking up with str8 boys - then yes, the odds of him being with a boy who is only interested in the $$money$$ are somewhere around 100%. Relationships (or interactions) like this are simply based on Sex-For-Pay, and to expect anything different would be extremely naïve.

[Oliver2]

That is correct. Just think; a gay young man in a rural area, poverty-stricken with limited employment opportunities and sexually-isolated, sees not only the bright financial lights of Pattaya or Bangkok but also the entertainment venues, the fun, the association with like-minded gay guys and the possibility of meeting the Dream Falang who may change his life, not to mention that of the family.

It took a visit to such a rural area to be with the family of my boyfriend to understand, fully understand, why Pattaya with all its problems and disappointments was, for him, the better option.

[christianpfc]

There are only two success cases that I have encountered (other than those who moved to Europe to live with a local mentioned in earlier post).

A Thai boy who worked in Kawaii for a short time, but I think already at that time he did it for entertainment and not for money. We met there and stayed in contact, and some years ago he bought a mobile phone case for 2000 THB (at that time, my mobile phone was 8000).

Another boy from Cambodia, whom I first met after his money boy career was already over, saved the money he earned and now has a small business.

Most boys I lose interest or contact, but from interaction can assume that they are no richer when they leave than when they started. Money either squandered by themselves or sucked out by family and friends, and squandered.

[Daveuk]

I remember one boy I got to know quite well after I met him on the Dongtan Gay beach in 2007. He had only just arrived in Pattaya and had not yet worked bar - instead he had a job overnight in a laundry. He told me he was not happy in his Isaan village because he was gay. He was a cute 19 year old twink looking for a farang to “take care”. I was very attracted particularly as he was wearing very brief speedos with a large cock outlined. It was back to my Complex hotel for sex and this developed into a 3 week “boyfriend” relationship. I was giving him good money and buying regular presents including a phone and a gold ear-ring. He surprised me by asking if he could keep his money in my room safe and this built up to a fair sum by the time I had to go home. I kept in touch with him but didn’t send any money but was able to return after 2 months. There was an affectionate reunion at the airport and things carried on as before. He said he had worked at Cupidol Gogo occasionally but had spent most time at home with his mother to whom he had given some of his money. I took him on a few trips away from Pattaya and the same request was made for me to store his money in my safe. At the end of my 4 week trip it had built up to almost 100 k baht. He started to talk about going to university and that maybe I could finance that. I said I would think about it but whilst at home a friend in Pattaya told me that he had acquired another farang boyfriend - a German. The boy telephoned me and I confronted him with my knowledge of his new boyfriend. His reply was that he was to enrol at university and that this was very expensive. I later found out that he had actually done this and was studying marketing in Bkk and was doing well. He was also happy because he had found a few young gay friends at the college. I didn’t ever meet him again and often wonder what became of him - maybe by now he is a top executive in a,multi-national. On the hand perhaps he went back to the sex industry and continued finding “boyfriends”.
He cost me quite a bit of money, but it was well spent. We had great sex and quite a lot of fun so,I couldn’t complain.

[vnman]

I didn’t ever meet him again and often wonder what became of him

I understand that the previous mamasan of Cupidol opened a bar in Jomtien. It might be something you can ask considering your motive. She stays in contact or has info about many of the boys.

[latintopxxx]

yes i think that most lose their earnings to their extended family back in the countryside...would think they could open a bank account & safeguard their earnings but somehow money management seems beyond most of them...maybe thats why the Thai Chinese dominate the economy

[Marc K]

yes i think that most lose their earnings to their extended family back in the countryside...would think they could open a bank account & safeguard their earnings but somehow money management seems beyond most of them...

My experiences pretty much mirror those expressed here. You would think that hoarding/saving/safeguarding financial security is an innate skill in humanity, but alas if you come with no money then any financial windfall calls for a celebration (by you, or by a leech in the family) and poof there goes the money.

It's quite tragic. Whoredom doesn't seem to be a step on the ladder of success alas. It IS quite tragic.

[Daveuk]

I understand that the previous mamasan of Cupidol opened a bar in Jomtien. It might be something you can ask considering your motive. She stays in contact or has info about many of the boys.

Well of course it’s a long time ago that I had the experiences with that “gay beach” boy. I did go to Cupidol in BT in subsequent trips but he was never there. I like to think after accumulating enough funds from “boyfriends” he left the sex trade and that I contributed to him having a good life.
I must have had sex with maybe more than a hundred boys during my trips to Thailand and I can only recall about a dozen of them, but I won’t forget my “beach boyfriend” especially with him wearing his red speedos which always got me horny.

[latintopxxx]

...i must be getting melancholic...gettingn old...never used to really think/care about the gogos...

[Oliver2]

It's easy to see the downside of relationships like the one Daveuk describes, particularly the cost and the fear that you are being taken for a ride....a view sometimes expressed here on this site. But there are positives which go beyond the usual ones of sex and companionship.

Like others, I've reached the stage in my life when I'm losing friends and family and my social circle is becoming smaller by the year.. Gay men don't usually have children and grandchildren to care for them; our relationships fulfil that role. And with the ravages of time, it means that a younger guy can provide a complex combination of friendship, companionship lover, and a quasi father/son function.

It brings worry of course; anxieties about health, about employment prospects, about family....and I've experienced all these. Bit then I console myself by accepting that such things are a consequence of love. To have someone to worry about becomes a blessing.