When Barry met Leo

[cdnmatt]

Ohhh, who the fuck knows. Leo's still on holiday with Barry, but isn't in love with him, and thinks Barry is stupid.

I guess Tobi is where it's at. Some 31 year old guy who works on the assembly line of a car manufacturing factory somewhere in Germany. Apparently, Tobi is really good at sex, so I'm out the window, and Tobi's in. Well, that was how the phone call started at least a couple weeks ago when Leo called, but once he heard my voice and words again, he quickly changed his mind, and decided he loves me again. Only problem here is Tobi has absolutely no plans or way to take care of Leo, and obviously doesn't seem to love him much, because if he did, at the very least he would have ensured Leo had a working phone before he fucked off back to Germany. Tobi's going to be back in Bangkok for Songkran though, and they will "figure it out" I guess.

Then I thought I finally got through to him, and got him back to normal. But of course not, because he's Leo and is crazy. The new plan was him and Barry were going to split ways, and he was going to stay with Kong in Vientiane, and wait for me to get there and we'd talk it over. Then in true Leo fashion, I get a message saying Barry changed his mind, so Leo's still on holiday until the 17th I guess, or who knows, it changes every day.

So the last few days I've simply been getting pissed off, and telling Leo he has to decide what the fuck he wants. Do you want me to love and care about you and have me as a husband, or do you want to be free as a bird? He doesn't know, and he has to think about it I guess. So then I got pissed off again, and told him if he had any heart, he wouldn't do this to me and leave me hanging like this. My first farang husband did this to me, and I lost 3 or 4 years of my life because he couldn't decide what the fuck he wanted. I told Leo that, and told him he needs to decide, but he can't make up his mind as of yet. He knows all he has to do is send me a quick WhatsApp message of "fuck off", and that will be it, and I'll leave him alone forever. He hasn't done that yet though, so I'm stuck waiting with my dick swinging in the wind.

The shit thing is, I owe this fucken idiot my life. I would have been dead multiple times over if it wasn't for his love, support, compassion and empathy, as he's the only reason I'm currently a confident blind guy. I know full well I wouldn't have been able to do this without him, so although everyone in my family thinks I'm crazy, I have no choice but to care about him. Well, unless he tells me to fuck off, but I haven't got that message yet, and am still waiting for him to decide.

This sucks, because I already know how this is going to play out. Leo's little stunt traumatized me in a way I've never experienced, so delayed my life a decent amount. I should be in Vientiane shortly though, so just let Leo see me in the flesh again, and I already know how this will probably go. Actually, that's wrong, and I don't know.

I know what Leo wants, and he wants exactly what my first farang husband wanted. He wants all the benefits of having me as a husband, but without any of the work or sacrifice that comes along with a long-term relationship. My rules are simple -- don't lie and don't cheat. Other than that, do whatever the fuck you want in life, and I will be there to support you 100%, I will be there to love you every day even when you're old and fat and ugly, I will make you happy when you're sad, I will cook you delicious dinners every night and even breakfast in bed at times, and I will always be there for you no matter what. Or you can be free as a bird, and he still doesn't know what he wants.

In good news though, Kong and myself have been getting along well. No romance or anything, and just purely friends. heh, he already told me straight up he's not giving me sex. Nonetheless, we know each other well enough now that I can trust him to take care of me once I get there, do my shopping for me, etc.

Then I think what I will do is just get another 3 or 4 guys like Kong to come live with me. There's probably thousands of young, gay, cute, broke university students in Vientiane who would enjoy a nice home to live in. I'm still adamant that I'm getting my house with a private swimming pool, meaning I will have 4 or 5 bedrooms, so there will be room. That way if and when one fucks off on me, I'll have a few back ups, and won't be left as a stranded blind guy in Asia.

[Nirish guy]

although everyone in my family thinks I'm crazy .

Well, there's one thing we can all agree with them on at least......

[Blacktouch]

I think Leo is just using you, hence the reason he can't make up his mind wherther to stay or leave you?

Too much to loose if he were to drop you. If he really loved you, he will wait for you to arrive back and both live happily ever after?

Come on Matt Sir, wake up and smell the coffee.

[cdnmatt]

No, he's not using me, and I can promise you that. If his intent was to take advantage of me, he'd be going about this totally differently. At the very least, he wouldn't have refused the multiple times I recently offered to send him money to buy a new phone.

I don't know what the hell he is doing, and according to him, he doesn't know himself. He has to decide what he wants, because he's not allowed to string me along like my first husband did. Geez, I hate it when people view kindness as weakness, as I'm 37 now, so I'm getting tired of this shit. You can't just go pull stunts like this, and think everything will be ok, just because I happen to be a really nice guy. That's not the way this works.

So it's up to him, and he needs to figure out who he is, and what he wants. Thinking things are going to work out great between him and Tobi is just fucken retarded, and I know he knows that. Tobi is just some poor assembly line worker who lives in Germany, and has no means or desire to take care of Leo. It's a pure lust based relationship, which will fizzle out within a couple years at most, and Leo is smart enough to know this.

He knows full well the level of love and life I can provide, and he also knows I will love him forever regardless of how old and ugly he gets, or what the future brings us. My love for him is unquestionable, and he knows that. He also knows the chances of him living a good, happy, fulfilling, enriched life without me are slim to none, so I don't know what he's doing.

I have no idea, and up to him. Whether he wants to commit to me, or wants the freedom to throw his legs up in the air for anyone who happens to have a dick. He doesn't actually want to hurt me, and he knows if he decides he can't keep his dick in his pants, then he has to break it off with me. It's up to him.

Until he tells me to leave him alone in life though, then I will continue to care and worry about him, so I hope he doesn't take too long to make up his mind. The only reason I'm currently alive and typing this very message is because of him, so I can't just leave him behind in life, because I know the life he has a 98% chance of leading without me. I'm at the point I don't really care which way it goes, but I just want to know -- do you want me as a husband so we can get back on track and begin making a strong life together again, or are we over so I can forget about you and move on with my life?

I don't know, I don't think any of this matters right now. At the moment I consider Kong a good friend, know he has a good heart, and trust him enough to take care of me. No romance or anything, but just friends that take care of each other. So I'll get to Vientiane when I can, hopefully sooner than later. Let Leo see me in person, and I bet he ends up remembering what we once had together, and that will clear up his mind almost instantly. I could be wrong, but that's my guess.

[scottish-guy]

... Leo's still on holiday with Barry...

How can that possibly be? What kind of fireman gets over a month's holiday at a time?

[goji]

There is no monogamy in this relationship.

So just accept that and hire a new boy each & every time you get bored with the last one. That's how most of us to it, particularly those of us who do not reside permanently in SE Asia.

<THE END>

[cdnmatt]

How can that possibly be? What kind of fireman gets over a month's holiday at a time?

Yeah, I have yet to understand that myself. I guess Barry is on vacation for 6 months, so he's either lieing, quit, or got fired. Who knows....

Then last I heard, Barry's boyfriend from Ireland is showng up in Asia on the 18th, at which time Leo is getting the boot. I have no idea, but that's the last I heard.

[scottish-guy]

He might be retired or on long term sick (but highly doubtful as he'd need to be available for examination) - or as you say lying, quit or fired but there's absolutely no way I can believe he's a serving fireman with a 6 month holiday - you need to be a UK teacher for that (they only work 195 days a year, minus sick leave - to which they're entitled to 100 working days at full pay and another 100 at half pay.

And still they threaten to go on strike

[cdnmatt]

There is no monogamy in this relationship.

So just accept that and hire a new boy each & every time you get bored with the last one. That's how most of us to it, particularly those of us who do not reside permanently in SE Asia.

<THE END>

Yeah, I think I've come around to that realization. I've tried three times in this life for a husband now, and I'm tired of devoting my heart and soul to someone, then have them constantly tell me how amazing I am and how they love me more than life and can't live without me, etc. Then only to turn around and put my heart through a meat grinder due to stunts like this. I don't understand it.

Actually, that's wrong, I do understand it, I think. You know that Myers Brigg personality test? I always score heavy INFP, which means I'm naturally attracted to ENFGs. These are people who are very free spirited, fun loving, exciting, and independent thinkers. I think that's why I keep getting hurt like this, and not much I can do about it, because I don't get to control who I'm naturally attracted to.

So I think I will just follow suit with many of you, scrap the idea of a monogamous relationship, move to Vientiane, and become a gay polygamist. I've been working extremely hard, so still plan to reward myself with a nice house with private swimming pool and Western kitchen. That place will be way too large for just Kong and myself, so of course I'll get some dogs again.

Then I'll just find a few other young, cute, gay, broke guys, preferably university students, and offer them a place to live. I know the language, culture, and societal norms more than enough to make this a reality. They get free home, their own bedroom, free food, swimming pool in the backyard, I'll cook good dinners all the time, etc. And they get it for free, without having to do anything, except maybe 20 minutes a week to help me out with any problems I have due to being blind (read this letter for me, type of shit).

Then just continue doing exactly what I'm doing with my software business, except instead of doing it from my elderly parent's house in Canada, I'll do it in Vientiane with a bunch of cute gay guys. They don't owe me anything, and simply get a bump up in life because I'm a nice guy, and don't feel like living alone, not to mention I can't live alone anymore. If any of them ever decides they want a little extra spending cash, just come into my bedroom where I will be sitting at my desk working, and sit on my lap. Up to them if they want to do that or not.

Seems like a good idea at least, but I'm assuming a good portion of that is because I haven't had sex in 7 months.

Then who the fuck knows what Leo is doing. I'm sure when the dust sttles, at the very least I will provide him with shelter and food, but that's probably about it. He's fucked in this life without me, and he knows that himself, so I'm not sure why he thought it was a good idea to hurt me in the way he did.

[goji]

Actually, that's wrong, I do understand it, I think. You know that Myers Brigg personality test? I always score heavy INFP, which means I'm naturally attracted to ENFGs. These are people who are very free spirited, fun loving, exciting, and independent thinkers. I think that's why I keep getting hurt like this, and not much I can do about it, because I don't get to control who I'm naturally attracted to.

So I think I will just follow suit with many of you, scrap the idea of a monogamous relationship, move to Vientiane, and become a gay polygamist.

Is this forum some kind of experiment with people who are normally sane are constantly challenged by troll-bots ?
Are we all losers for not being capable of kicking it into touch ?

Middle class farang meets cute but poor Asian boy.
When the cute boy ceases to respect his benefactor & earn the money, just redirect the money to a more deserving boy. Life is easy..