I love her husband, did I really destroy his marriage or it meant to be that way by destiny?

[Blueskytoday]

End this,,,,quickly.....pls

[paborn]

Personally, I don't care if it ends or continues. Posts I don't care about I don't read. Communication on a site like this is hard enough.; if two people want to talk, let them. What real difference does it make?

[Argosy]

16 pages?

160 posts?

Seriously?

This thread is taking on Tarntawanian proportions

I’m amused at the feigned sense of indignation your posting implies. Presumably you’re feeling cheated by this thread having wasted your time. Expending yet even more time, with the pressing need to inform us, you draft and post this message to state your boundaries. Amazing insight, Mr. Magoo.

[scottish-guy]

Why, thank you Mr HYDRA

[cdnmatt]

arsenal, isn't your main account still suspended for being an asshole?

Just haven't learned, or what?

[Argosy]

Why, thank you Mr HYDRA

You're a wizard at promoting the odd conspiracy theory and I know you'd love to have a nuanced discussion about your latest fantasy, however watching wet paint dry might be far more enlightening.

[andyrose]

Back to the OP. Two cases of what I call non-commitment.

You found Michael younger/richer/better sex than Ben, so you swapped Ben for Michael.

Michael found his wife pregnant, and thought the baby needs him more than you need him, so he swapped you for the baby.

This "swapping for something better/richer/easier/more fun" is a character trait that I have not witnessed in Europe, but do a lot here in Thailand. Furthermore, you spent a lot of words to talk about their money, which shows where your interest lies?

Yes, I was dating Ben because of his money and nothing else and I am not going to deny it.

As I mentioned before, I came from an upper class Thai family. I couldn't handle the fact that my father was almost bankrupt. I didn't want to be in a difficult situation because I was used to a comfortable life.

I found Ben and I knew from my instinct that he loved me.
Yes, I used him for money.
Yes, I hoped to get his assets and his pension from Germany.
I never loved him and I couldn't force myself to love him.

When I met Michael, I fell in love with him immediately; I knew it from my heart. I didn't think about his money at all because I loved him.
When I truly love someone, I don't care that much about their finances.

I know Ben loved me but I couldn't force myself to love him just as I couldn't force myself not to love Michael.

I couldn't force my feelings to let go of him when he wanted to call it a day.

Love is a very strange feeling. Even though the feeling belongs to me I cannot force it one way or the other.

It is my feeling but it is free from me. I cannot control it so it's mystery.

[StevieWonders]

Two words actually, but who is counting and who cares. I merely mentioned that your suggested reason for your inaccuracies was unlikely, and suggested how you could avoid similar errors in the future, since you seem to be super sensitive about any comment that might be considered critical.

Prickly as a hedgehog with a hardon.

We're in Snowflake Territory Brad the Impala:

A snowflake, a snowflake,
Jesus wants me for a snowflake.
A snowflake, a snowflake,
I'll be a snowflake for Him!

[andyrose]

Good for you, but if you put a downbeat tale like this on a gay message board you must expect some harsh feedback. And adding that you are 'choosing to handle it with class' (in bold type no less) does not help your cause - it merely encourages people to believe that you're a bit full of yourself for all your apparent remorse at events years ago.

Yes, and you know what, you are so right; I am full of myself. I have to accept the fact.

When I studied in England, one of my teachers called me one day and whispered to me "Andy, did you realize when you entered to the classroom, you acted like you were better than every student in the class?

Your face were like ..... and she used her face as an example, a face up high, acting very snobbish. She explained to me in a soft friendly voice, kind of in a funny way. I was laughing when she tried to imitate me.

When I came back from England, I got a job in a hotel in Bangkok; I always acted like I was better than everyone. I was not and I am not a hypocrite person. I like to act from my heart, not what I think it will look good.

I was very proud that I came from an upper class family. I am a Bangkok boy and when I saw Issan boys or girls with Farangs I would look down on them (my thought was "prostitutes trying to catch Farangs").

"We are from different classes, on a different levels", I thought to myself.

When my father's finances went south due to an economy crisis at that time, it effected me directly.

I met an older Scottish man (62) while I was only 22 (at that time). I knew from my instinct that he liked me and was quite well off.

He was working in Bangkok as an engineer. We were dating and I took advantage of him financially. I was no better than Issan boys that I had insulted.

My situation at that time was not much different than those Issan guys at all. Whatever I looked down on them, it came back to me as karma. I understand exactly.

Years later, when I was around 24, I met an Issan guy and we became close friends. We could talk about everything. He came from a very poor family in Isann (province of ROI-ET). We came from a totally different backgrounds, but we could get along very well. His family could not afford to send him to a high school so he had to get aid from a provincial fund for promising students.

He also got a scholarship to attend Chula University in Bangkok. He was a smart, intelligent student and he graduated with a good GPA. We're still contact even now; sometimes I call him from Canada just to see how's he doing.

I also met an Issan girl few years ago when I was back in Bangkok. We became a very good friends; we hit it off from the get-go. She was very friendly, humble, and generous.

When we went out to restaurants, she would pay the bill. I had to tell her many times that I didn't want that. I wanted us to pay 50-50 but she would run to the cashier to pay up when she knew we were about to call for the bill.

I once invited her to a Dusit Thani hotel (a five star hotel in the heart of Bangkok near Silom) because I wanted to enjoy the luxurious atmosphere there.

We had dinner in the restaurant and at the end we almost had a fight. The bill was nearly 2,000 baht and I insisted that I pay because I had invited her. When the server brought us the bill I immediately opened my wallet and so did she. I asked the server to take my money and she did the same. No one was backing off.

It was a very funny scene and the server was laughing. She won the fight with strong words which I'll never forget: "Please let me treat you this time; next time you can treat me." She said this while holding my hand.

She is such a wonderful person. She is my good friend and I still talk to her occasionally on the phone. She's never had a Farang boyfriend and she is not a 'working' girl. She has her own business.

She knows I've had many farang boyfriends in the past (do you see the irony?).

Yes, I used to be so full of myself but I think I am a different person now.

I am more humble, more considerate, less selfish.

I am not a perfect person but a better person than before.

Yes, I was so arrogant and sassy when my father was well-off.

Yes, I was so stuck up when I married a millionaire medical doctor. When I married him in 2012, I felt like everything in the world belonged to me. A moment later everything evaporated, just like that, from top to bottom. I separated from him in 2014.

From a big house in an upper class, rich neighborhood in Belgium, to a tiny room in a basement in a middle class area in Toronto. (just like that, again). The bathroom in the house in Belgium was bigger than my current room in Toronto.

The good thing is, if I were still in that situation, I would never be the better person I am now. I would have been a snobbish, mean person. When a situation changes, it also changes you automatically.

As I mentioned before, everything happens for a reason. They have their own reasons and we have to learn from them. I have learned a lot so far.

I have grown up and I am thankful to my Buddha for guiding me through my new life.

I thank my Buddha for everything so far.

[bobsaigon2]

Gott im Himmel !