My best friend died.

[joe552]

Don't worry, I'm not going to start flooding the board again, and I'm sure a Mod will move this if it should be somewhere else, but it's about my first time in Pattaya. It might be a long post, so put the kettle on. I'd known David, an American psychologist living in Dublin, for about 5 years. Friends of ours, Peter (an undertaker) and his partner Ann (an educator) invited us to join them in Pattaya, where they were visiting an old friend from Ireland. We both jumped at the chance. Just to say, we were friends, not partners. David was bisexual, although not in a relationship at the time.

We were met at the old Don Meaung (I still can't spell it) by our driver - a first for me. We stayed at the Welcome Plaza. The name of Pete's friend escapes me, so I'll call him Noel. He was living in Centre Condo and dying of AIDS - he wasn't gay. We went for a drink there with him one night and I asked him quietly about finding a boy bar. He pointed me in the direction of Boyztown.

The 4 of us, Pete and Ann, David and I, would meet in Cowboy bar on 2nd Road. We'd have a few drinks, then go our separate ways. David and I sat in Panorama sizing up BBB. We went in and felt slightly overwhelmed. There were young men in their undies! Not having a clue how the 'system' worked, I asked our waiter. "You like boy you tell me number. I bring boy, you buy drink for he. After, up to you". It was that simple.

I took a boy back to my room in Welcome Plaza. I thought he was beautiful. "Is ok we sit naked and have beer? I want look at you." "Sure". My first Thai boy - I can still see his face.

Close to the Welcome Plaza was Starboys (I've got that name wrong before). It was there I met Kwan, the 2nd love of my life, and who I saw last January.

Anyway, David never made it back to Pattaya. Last August he was diagnosed with cancer of the colon. Despite aggressive chemo, he died in a hospice a couple of months ago. I miss him every day.

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[paborn]

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

[Nirish guy]

Yes sorry for the loss of your friend Joe, hopefully just writing about him helps a little.

It's a good reminder to us all that tomorrow is promised to no one and we all should concentrate on the good stuff that matters and maybe not so much on the every day grind of life that is so easy to get sucked into making you loose perspective on the actual joys and pleasures of just being lucky enough to be ALIVE at ALL.

[scottish-guy]

Good sentiments NIrish.

Let's face it, almost everybody who contributes on here is or has been in a fortunate enough position to be able to travel to Thailand at some time or other, and either find their own little piece of paradise (or maybe just a little piece!)

Whatever happens in the future we'll at least have those memories

I'm glad that Joe's friend made it at least once - and quite the co-incidence as on our (see below) first trip we stayed at the Welcome Plaza (£15 a night for a junior suite then) and the first boy that I ever got "involved" with moved from Gentleman Club to Star Boys (which for anybody who doesn't know was a small bar across the main road from BT - opposite Fortune Pharmacy and the WP hotel)

My own travelling companion of 20yrs passed away a year ago this month (same thing - Colon cancer) and he would have loved to make one last trip to make hay - but by the time the seriousness of his condition was known (from being declared "in remission" after surgery and 2 rounds of chemo, to an agonising and horrific death in the space of 7 weeks) he wasn't capable of travelling as far as the front door never mind a 12,000 mile round trip.

Half his ashes are around a tree in my back garden and 3 days ago the BF (unprompted by me) put out flowers, a glass of whisky and a bowl of crisps on the anniversary of his death. Touching but funny at the same time.

I'm only disappointed my m8 didn't materialise in the wee small hours to drain the whisky - it's the first time he's ever not finished a drink!

[paborn]

I hate using "like" for this take it as a symbol of empathy. We've all either been there or will be.

[joe552]

paborn, I agree. Could management not institute a graded 'like' system, similar to Facebook? Where you can like or love or laugh or cry?

Thanks for the comments, guys.

[a447]

All the sad news of recent events in Thailand and now the passing of friends mentioned here puts my rather frivolous posts well and truly into perspective.

Sorry to hear of your losses, guys. How sad.

[Jellybean]

I join with other members, joe552, in saying how sorry I am to hear of the death of your best friend and echo the sentiments expressed by NIrish-guy in the quote detailed below:

Yes sorry for the loss of your friend Joe, hopefully just writing about him helps a little.

It's a good reminder to us all that tomorrow is promised to no one and we all should concentrate on the good stuff that matters and maybe not so much on the every day grind of life that is so easy to get sucked into making you loose perspective on the actual joys and pleasures of just being lucky enough to be ALIVE at ALL.

[joe552]

a447, what would the Board be without your posts? Boring, that's what.