Do you wash after pissing?

[Nirish guy]

God love the poor bugger - ( young) people forget just how shit it must have been for people back then, in the VERY recent past ! With the pressures they faced simply for being gay.

It’s thankfully almost impossible to imagine that simply being gay might be a reason to consider killing your self these days, but there’s the poor Earl, his father died just 9 days previous and it’s believed he topped himself just because he was gay. How terribly sad - and yet in a strange way his death probably moved the 8th Earl to push through the legislation to decriminalise homosexuality and thank goodness for him and his efforts or (even) more people would I’m sure still be topping themselves to this day.

It’s a funny / strange old world in which we live.

[Nirish guy]

And THIS by the way ( Mods) is a very good example as to why threads should be allowed to deviate and wander from their strict title topic, as here we've gone from washing your hands after pissing to the decriminalisation of homosexuality - not a bad jump. And to be fair to you all, things were allowed to amble on nicely to even reach this point, which just shows that light moderation such as was displayed here and on other threads of late in general IS (IMHO) the right model usually and makes for a much more interesting read when flicking through threads - usually.

[frequent]

With the pressures they faced simply for being gay.

I have to disagree (I'm sure you won't be surprised). I'm sick to death of people saying it was "illegal to be gay". No such thing. It was illegal for one male to have sex with another male. You could be as "gay" as you liked (whatever that means) and incur no legal penalty, as long as you weren't caught having sex with another male - and the vast majority were never, ever caught

[arsenal]

Even Oscar Wilde, the cause célèbre of sexuality injustice would have been fine if he hadn't been so stupid/arrogant as to sue the old Marquess.

[Nirish guy]

I have to disagree (I'm sure you won't be surprised). I'm sick to death of people saying it was "illegal to be gay". No such thing. It was illegal for one male to have sex with another male. You could be as "gay" as you liked (whatever that means) and incur no legal penalty, as long as you weren't caught having sex with another male - and the vast majority were never, ever caught

I think you'll find I said no such thing and indeed you accurately quoted me in my talking about "the pressures of being gay"not about it being illegal although I accept many people conflate the two issues.

However, whilst you're also correct of course re the law related to homosexual acts and not sexuality itself I say bollocks to that and refuse to allow (usually straight people) to get away with their claim "oh it was fine to BE gay and it wasn't illegal just dont have sex" - it wasn't ! People HAD to hide their SEXUALITY not just the act in case of discrimination in many areas, both legal, jobs, housing and many more - and if the straights could play that card to this day on us they still would.

Being gay isn't just sexuality it's your full LIFE and that ( for most people) involves a healthy sex life (if they're lucky) and for straights to suggest they were absolutely "allowing" us to "be" just as long as we conformed to their laws, then I say NO THEY WEREN'T and BOLLOCKS TO THEM and would point out to them that their carefully written laws WERE absolutely designed to target and stop gay people from being "themselves" and living a full normal life in every way and if we accept their premise that that wasn't the case then we're letting them off the hook on that one and run the risk of them trying to play that very same card the next time they think they might get away with it again !

[frequent]

“I think you’ll find” I didn’t report you as saying that. It’s your general attitude to which I object; I have no time for the whole gay martyrdom meme. As I remarked to Smiles about his Trump rant, I try to be a stoic and overlook what I cannot change - which is almost everything. Life’s too short

[arsenal]

Stoic freaky wrote.
"I try to be a stoic and overlook what I cannot change"

Does that include every little spelling mistake or grammar error you see here?

[Nirish guy]

So, were you disagreeing then with my comment that people back then ( and now) faced ( and face) various pressures, simply for being gay ?

I doubt it was a walk in the park for them somehow - either then - or still now in many parts of the world and that's not trying to make or allow anyone to be come a martyr, its just simply a fact - and one that we SHOULDN"T either forget or stop repeating until it becomes a non issue for gay people in their lives the world over. otherwise it sounds more like "life too short, so I dont give a shit" - which is fine if that's your view, but it's not mine.

[paborn]

In the US there are still states where one can be fired for being Gay. I'm not saying fired for having sex in the office coffee room, but appearing to be Gay. Also, Arsenal, while you're right one must remember that Oscar had to find a wife to pass in society. We have had gay martyrs, beaten up and left to die or killed on the spot. Martyrdom is not a theme it's a sad mime of straight society.

[frequent]

So, were you disagreeing then with my comment that people back then ( and now) faced ( and face) various pressures, simply for being gay ?

I doubt it was a walk in the park for them somehow - either then - or still now in many parts of the world and that's not trying to make or allow anyone to be come a martyr, its just simply a fact - and one that we SHOULDN"T either forget or stop repeating until it becomes a non issue for gay people in their lives the world over. otherwise it sounds more like "life too short, so I dont give a shit" - which is fine if that's your view, but it's not mine.

You are confusing the action and the response. The action is the discrimination you mention; the response is "oh poor me, I'm a martyr". For as long as I can remember, certainly since my early teenage years when I realised I was attracted to men, I've known that those who would discriminate, by word or deed, were wrong. Clearly they were wrong since there was nothing wrong with me. Therefore I did not need to depend on their valuation of me. It's lead to a lifelong scepticism about people - most people are fools, their opinions are usually prejudices, the law is an ass, reflecting in many cases merely the majority prejudices of the day. Discrimination happens all the time and for all sorts of reasons. I've seen people sidelined for their opinions, their religion, their wife, their face doesn't fit, they don't toe the line, they're "cynical". The latest form of social (and employment) discrimination - making foolish posts on Facebook!!!

It's why I sometimes change the footer in my posts to the quotation from Jane Austen's Pride & Prejudice - and I will do so again now