Cream Teas in Pattaya.

[arsenal]

Two of our most highly regarded members (both of whom have been the subject of multiple transfer bids from other gay boards such is the sparkle, hilarity and relevance of their posts) have piqued my interest on another forum. As an English gentleman abroad I have never had the pleasure of a cream tea in Pattaya. I was wondering where someone of taste and refinement such as myself might go. Any recommendations?

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[frequent]

Two of our most highly regarded members (both of whom have been the subject of multiple transfer bids from other gay boards such is the sparkle, hilarity and relevance of their posts) have piqued my interest on another forum. As an Engliish gentleman abroad I have never had the pleasure of a cream tea in Pattaya. I was wondering where someone of taste and refinement such as myself might go. Any recommendations?

Since you may be Engliish (sic), are almost certainly a broad but definitely not a gentleman I'm not sure how anyone can assist

[arsenal]

And please everyone. Make sure the strawberry jam is homemade and the cream from pure bred Jersey cows before posting any suggestions. I'm not looking to slum it. Many thanks.

[frequent]

I'm not looking to slum it.

Why break the habit of a lifetime?

[arsenal]

My preferred beverage is of course, Earl Grey but a fine English breakfast tea also works well and would be acceptable.

[cdnmatt]

Learn how to make your own. It can't be that difficult.

I make my own everything these days. Sauces, seasonings, bread, buns, salad dressing, everything.

[frequent]

That's what servants are for, Matt

[scottish-guy]

..I was wondering where someone ..such as myself might go.

Yes - but the good taste for which I am noted, prohibits me from telling you.

[Andaman!]

Arsenal - follow the instructions below for a cream tea in Pattaya:

1) Visit Pastry Addiction on Pattaya Beach Road and purchase scones
2) Find nearest 7/11and pick up a jar of strawberry jam
3) Take scones and jam to Good Boys bar in Sunee Plaza and find seat at rear of bar behind screen
4) Cut each scone in half and smear liberally with strawberry jam
5) Dependent on how much cream you prefer on your scone, wave 300 baht each in front of various members of staff
6) Staff will accept 300 baht and unzip their flies to display substantial penises, often from the north east Isaan region.
7j Provide manual or oral assistance to each participant until they unload a fresh load of cream onto the scone. Repeat as necessary.
8) Enjoy your Pattaya cream tea

[Jellybean]

Arsenal - follow the instructions below for a cream tea in Pattaya:

1) Visit Pastry Addiction on Pattaya Beach Road and purchase scones
2) Find nearest 7/11and pick up a jar of strawberry jam
3) Take scones and jam to Good Boys bar in Sunee Plaza and find seat at rear of bar behind screen
4) Cut each scone in half and smear liberally with strawberry jam
5) Dependent on how much cream you prefer on your scone, wave 300 baht each in front of various members of staff
6) Staff will accept 300 baht and unzip their flies to display substantial penises, often from the north east Isaan region.
7j Provide manual or oral assistance to each participant until they unload a fresh load of cream onto the scone. Repeat as necessary.
8) Enjoy your Pattaya cream tea

Ah-ha! I wondered how long it would be before an imaginative member posted an alternative version of the Pattaya cream tea. And what a well drafted post it was, if I may say so, Andaman.

But arsenal asked for a recommendation that did not entail him slumming, and a visit to Good Boys Bar is, in anyone’s lexicon, most definitely, slumming.

When I lived in Hua Hin I used to visit the Dusit Thani on a regular basis for afternoon tea with a female fa-ràng friend and a hi-so female Thai acquaintance. Both ladies enjoyed the sweet things in life and they always ordered a truly scrumptious selection of pastries, which included scones with clotted cream and strawberry jam. Mmmmm . . .

I had forgotten about those delightful, heavenly afternoons without a care in the world, apart from my expanding waistline, until your topic jogged my memory.

If you do not wish to slum it, arsenal, may I suggest you try the Dusit Thani Pattaya, or any other four or five star hotel.

Earl Grey tea is not a tea that suits my palate, arsenal. My current particular favourite is Her Majesty’s Blend, a tea which, interestingly, was introduced to me by a member of this forum with unparalleled knowledge of the finer things in life.