Ridiculously tiny Vietnamese guy

[nordicguy]

Or maybe he just wants some sympathy? Or maybe he does want money, but needs me to offer it to him in a different way? Or maybe he thinks I'm going to marry him and bring him back to Australia? Who knows.

That's really interesting to hear that you are in touch with him again now. I try to imagine how he looks. There must be something about him, since he's still on your mind :-)

I've been dating mainly Asian guys with a poor background (they make of the vast majority on all Asian guys you meet on the net and in bars and anywhere else in SE Asia) and I have usually been able to communicate with them in a fairly honest way about money. I acknowledge that they need money, and since I have - relatively speaking - loads of money compared to them, I would be wrong not to share some of my "wealth" with thim (again in relative terms, I'm not an excentric billionaire travelling around....) Thai boys don't seem to have any problem asking for money upfront, during and afterwards. Pinoys are much more discreet in their money requests and try to avoid direct requests at all means. I believe the same goes for most other SE Asian countries, also Vietnam. So you're probably right that you should never just offer money.

If he was expecting a marriage proposal, wouldn't you be able to feel that more directly? Like romantic hints?

[bobsaigon2]

On TV here in Vietnam, there's a program about poor families. Interviews, video of their impoverished life, and then maybe sort of game where they have a chance to win some money. Most of these people are struggling to pay off debts. Do they owe thousands to a money lender? No, they owe millions -- of động. Maybe a couple of hundred USD, but it takes them forever to accumulate enough to pay off the debt and the interest. If you're feeling generous......

But I could be misreading this. He asked for a cell phone. Was that more important to him than paying off the loans?

[extronaut]

There must be something about him, since he's still on your mind :-)

Well you got to admit, he is quite a puzzle.

Also, I wondered if I'd been a bit heartless at the end. But that's a different story.

He obviously had 'issues', as they say. There was something chronically glum about him. He had that wounded sparrow quality, and he seemed like he was looking at me to mend his wing.

Plus, the video show he put on late that night was hot, a total suprise, and rekindled my interest a bit.

So you're probably right that you should never just offer money.

So what am I supposed to do? Somehow slip the money into his pocket, via Facebook?

[extronaut]

But I could be misreading this. He asked for a cell phone. Was that more important to him than paying off the loans?

IKR. Wierd.

[nordicguy]

So what am I supposed to do? Somehow slip the money into his pocket, via Facebook?

Not sure how to approach. If I really like a boy but don't want to make him uncomfortable, I usually wait until the last meeting before I go back home and place money in his trouser pocket or bag or just give him a little packaging or something and insist that he doens't open it before I've left. But it's not that often that I've done things like that - only for very special boys who were in need (more than just a need for a new iPhone...) and deserved something extra.

The ultimate 'test' for your Viet guy would be your next time in bed ... if you are going to meet him again? If you will meet him again, you need to try to fuck him or make him show in one or the other way that he is really into you and it's not just about comfort and money. If he is as bad in bed as before, and does not show you any sign tha the wants to learn/improve, then it's hard to see what he wants really.

[a447]

Hopping into bed with a young guy is a game. Both sides play it and both sides know the rules.

If the boy decides he doesn't want to play fair, or can't be bothered putting sufficient energy into it to make it interesting for you, then maybe it's time to move on.

I think I probably would.

[extronaut]

a447, I have moved on. We're just net friends now.

And it's not that he couldn't be bothered, he did try, but his heart wasn't really in it. Sometimes he'd get a bit dirty, and it was hot when he did, but generally, I think he just isn't a very sexual person. He has issues.

I think what he really needed was a cuddle buddy. The sex being free, I have no problem with that at all. My only real issue was that he wanted a it to be a serious relationship, and naturally, expected me to be loyal. Unfortunately, this isn't enough to sustain me.

If I go back to Sài Gòn next year, which I probably will, and in the unlikely event that hasn't got a boyfriend yet, I'd be happy to give him cuddles. If he wants. But we're both going to have to talk about our expectations.

[Dick Hunter]

I think what he really needed was a cuddle buddy. .

I know this is an old thread. I just joined recently and I'm thinking about a trip to Vietnam and this caught my eye. I wonder if he wanted a boyfriend. Also, the sudden change in his attitude is interesting. It sounds like he was offended by something and was communicating it to you indirectly. I'm wondering if you're still in touch after all these years.

[latintopxxx]

nah...i can't even perform with someone who looks boyish...even worse when they have a little dick and its all poerfectly shaved/waxed down there...absolutrly kills the sex drive..

[infoarmor]

So was it ever explained what the Thai style consisted of?
Is it just helping yourself release on the guy's body?