What is their problem?

[joe552]

A little rant. Why can't they give a direct answer? My oldest friend from Sri Racha - I ask are you definitely coming to Pattaya for my birthday? Will you come with me to Khon Kaen?

My newer friend, from Laos but living in Pattaya a few years - when do you want to go out for dinner? (I know he doesn't like going to Sunee). What would you like to drink when you come to my room?

All these are simple questions, in my head. Is it any wonder I sometimes just want to go and have a few glasses of wine on my own?

Rant over.

When I go for a few drinks "on my own" I will usually have a waiter sit with me, and buy his drinks. But it's uncomplicated.

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[bobsaigon2]

Maybe, just maybe, some Asians are reluctant to state what they want as they feel it's not their place to do so, or they think it might be seen as too demanding when in conversation with an older person. They want to give the answer that they think will satisfy you, but they're not sure what that might be.

Or, they think the matter in question is not significant so they either don't answer to leave it "up to you".

Just guessing. We've no way of getting into the minds of either of those two guys.

[Tintin]

All these are simple questions, in my head. Is it any wonder I sometimes just want to go and have a few glasses of wine on my own?

You think too much! Learn to go with the flow...

[sglad]

You think too much! Learn to go with the flow...

He does flow...with the alcohol.

[sglad]

Maybe, just maybe, some Asians are reluctant to state what they want as they feel it's not their place to do so, or they think it might be seen as too demanding when in conversation with an older person. They want to give the answer that they think will satisfy you, but they're not sure what that might be.

...or maybe, they're just not interested and you lack the social skills to see it. Maybe you do see it and refuse to accept it because you think they're Thai and all Thais are in love with farang. If you ask someone out for coffee, and the person makes excuses not to go every time you asked, you'd get the drift after two or three times, wouldn't you? They don't really have to spell it out, do they? Same same in all cultures. Remember, these guys are not for hire and are not obliged to meet you.

[frequent]

You think too much! Learn to go with the flow...

I was reading the other day that our Western snowflakes now respond positively to an RSVP on Facebook for fear of offending the organiser, or as a way of endorsing the activity, while they have no intention of going to the event. It's the same in Asia - fear of making someone else lose face. It's another reason why Facebook (and this Forum) doesn't have a "Dislike" button, just a "Like" one. Sadly the world is becoming way too bland

[cdnmatt]

Exactly. Just learn to go with the flow, and take things as they come.

Don't try to pre-plan every last detail, because then you'll just look like an anal Westerner.

Go with the flow. It's honestly good for your soul...

[joe552]

sglad I found your posts unnecessarily insulting. I don't know if both were directed at me, or you included bobsaigon. Either way, I think you went too far.

[Oliver]

And I'm fed-up with the word "snowflake" as used by Trump supporters and other racist bigots, to describe those who-unlike Trump supporters and racist bigots- attempt to live their lives with a modicum of respect for others.
As far as Joe's problem is concerned, Bob's advice is spot-on.

[frequent]

And I'm fed-up with the word "snowflake" as used by Trump supporters and other racist bigots, to describe those who-unlike Trump supporters and racist bigots- attempt to live their lives with a modicum of respect for others.

It's used more generally to describe "millennials" so it's probably not a good idea to parade your ignorance thus

sglad I found your posts unnecessarily insulting. I don't know if both were directed at me, or you included bobsaigon. Either way, I think you went too far.

I didn't realise it was possible to go "too far" when insulting bobsaigon