Perhaps one of our esteemed moderators would point to the apparent rule that prohibits "any mention of children"
Perhaps one of our esteemed moderators would point to the apparent rule that prohibits "any mention of children"
Originally Posted by scottish-guy
Since 4 hours have passed I'll take that as a NO then?
So I'll assume the comment was just another example of things being made up as they go along
There are a few issues with the software Bob. On any long post I copy before posting. Not ideal but the best at the moment.
I have to agree with Matt's point (whatever I think about his idea of adopting). Surely the guidelines refer to discussing children in a sexual context, which is clearly not what Matt is thinking about. I'm sure there are members of the board who are fathers - should they not be allowed to talk about their children?
Hitchhiking's more of a challenge on the road less travelled.
Matt, about you adopting those children (assuming you were actually serious) if their mother is in financial trouble, would it not make more sense to financially support her on an ongoing basis, and leave the children where they belong?
Hitchhiking's more of a challenge on the road less travelled.
Good point, Joe. Although being adopted would give them a much more pleasant life materially, it might also be an emotionally upsetting situation when a farang attempts to introduce them to an international life involving schooling, eating and thinking that may be to them totally exotic, even bizarre. But it is a toss up. They might just embrace all the new aspects of life that Matt introduces to them and they may flourish. I am sure we all hope that posting guidelines will permit Matt to give us all the details about raising two Lao youngsters.
If the kids did stay with mom, then I am sure Matt would put in place some kind of long term disbursement procedure so that his help would continue until they are self-supporting.
joe552 (October 25th, 2017)
CDMatt. Why do you want to bring this into the story? What is to be gained? Can't you think up any adult characters to move the tale along?
Maybe Matt could introduce a couple of 18-19 year old cousins of Leo into the narrative. He helps them finish high school, get some training or some further education and at the same time shares with them an international perspective on life, trying to motivate them to expand their horizons, realize their full potential, and maybe doing some on the job training in his restaurant. If the story line remains with very young kids, I am afraid some of our board members, such as myself, will expire before the conclusion of the adopted kids segment of the KK Tales.
I'd certainly like to hear more of Matt's thinking on this. Yes, he could possibly provide a better life materially, but moving 2 children away from their family to live with a blind farang would surely traumatise them?
Hitchhiking's more of a challenge on the road less travelled.
No, I'm actually being serious, and I'm not lieing. This is simply my life. Leo is back in Laos right now, and this morning I e-mailed him, asking him to go talk to the mother again, because if she's serious and is unable to take care of the kids, then we're serious too. Don't worry, I fully understand this is a full-time 10 year commitment we're looking it, and more.
I'm sorry, but there's about an 80% chance we're going to take those kids, because without question, they're better off with us. Quite obviously, the mother knows and trusts Leo enough to put her kids in his hands. I've thought this through and through, and you have to realize, these kids have absolutely no future if they stay in that village. If they stay there, they will be stuck in dire poverty for the rest of their natural lives. Whereas with us, they get a fighting shot at a good future in this modern world of ours.
Right now, they have a 5 person family, and all sleep in a one bedroom chack. They don't even had beds, let alone bedrooms. They probably barely have any clotes, are underweight and malnourished, probably dirty with shit like tapeworm, don't really get much love or attention or love from their parents, and getting a horrible education from some public school in the village, and so on.
Leo and myself could turn all that around 100% for them. They would have a nice home with proper bedrooms and beds, we'd get them some posters of whatever they like they can hang up on their walls, the kitchen and cupboards would be full of food they could raid anytime they want, we'd get them into a proper international school with an Australian cirriculum, they would recieve all the love, attention and care they need, we'd have a nice house with a large yard to play sports in (and if I have my way, a swimming pool too), etc.
Without question, Leo and myself would make amazing parents. I've met more than enough totally worthless, pirce of shit sperm donors who call themselves fathers in my life, to know that we couldn't possibly do any worse. Again, Leo and myself have a relationship that's about as strong and deep as human relationships get, so I'm not worried about that. He;s stuck with me every day since I went blind, and trust, that wasn't easy. My dad has showed up twice now in Khon Kaen unannounced, trying to bring me back to Canada, but I flat out refused both times, because I was simply unwilling to leave my husband. Leo's dad was recently hospitalized, and the family expected Leo to stay in the village to take care of his father. However, he decided differently, and pissed off the whole family by coming back to Khon Kaen to take care of his blind husband, and without question, that must have been a very difficult decision for him to make.
For another example, Leo and myself never actually argue, eh? So the kids won't have to constantly listen to parents who yell and scream at each other, which I'm sure many of us had to experience, including myself. Sure, we have our problems and differences, but when a problem arises, we always just sit down as rational adults, and talk about it in an open, honest and civil mannger, and come up with a solution that works for both of us. Both of us intrinsically understand that neither of us can do this life alone, but if we stick together, then we can make a very strong life, so we work together on everything.
And lots of other things. For example, looks like there's about a 90% chance I'm landing a very lucrative contract with a firm in Taiwan. Assuming that does go through, I'll be required to fly to Taiwan to train their software developers, which I've done before a couple times in Canada, so have experience with it. Assuming that contract goes through, and the timing is right, I'm going to want to take the kids with us. Simply because experiencing new countriries and cultures is without question the best education you can get in this life. Same goes for when Leo and myself go to Canada and visit my family -- those kids are coming, and can check out Canada too.
Without us, and if they stay in the village with their mother, they have no hope for the future. With us, at least the get a fighting shot. Leo and myself obviously won't be the best parents this world offers, and we're going to make our fair share of mistakes. Nonetheless, we can give these kids a far better shot at a good future than they would otherwise get, so more than likely, we're going to take them. Remains to be seen, but there's a good chance that's going to happen.
I fully understand the gravity of the situation, but I'm certain Leo and myself would be good parents.
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