I'm glad our views are closer. You will certainly have far more experience of the unhappily married gays than I. I can fully understand that these guys let themselves go to seed pretty quickly as they have almost no route to any form of personal happiness and sexual satisfaction. I can't help comparing their plight with that of a really nice 32 year old Japanese I met in the 24 sauna in Shinjuku 3 years ago. Although not as slim as some, he looked younger than his age. But he, too, had felt forced to marry at a young age and lived with his wife and 2 kids. But he was either at work or commuting all week. Sunday he attended to family duties but Saturday was his day and he spent it in various gay hangouts. We had a great, extended time together. China just does not offer gay and bisexual men these kind of facilities.