Two boyfriends ?

[latintopxxx]

oh ok....I speed read...couldnt be bothered with all the small type...more than 4 sentences and I'm gone. Now I comprehendo...cya.

[Surfcrest]

Just a reminder latintopxxx, you can always increase the font size for easier reading by holding the Control Ctrl button down and pressing the + key to the desired size. I increase the font size until the blue bars stretches across the entire screen. Some may not need it that big, my reading eyes are bad. You can always adjust it back by pressing the Control Ctrl button down and pressing the - key.

Surfcrest

[justaguy]

You mentioned you've been in this relationship for the past twelve years and for me we're coming up on 20 years this September. When you have found someone you can spend that many years with, whether you call them your husband, your life partner or just your boyfriend...that's a significant amount of time. This could be the most important relationship of your life looking back someday and yet...it's these indiscretions or events that could have derailed all of that you'll both remember the most, which will define a big part of all those years.

You need only look at Bill and Hillary to recall the most remembered event of their 40 year union.

Surfcrest

Yes. Of course what happened back in november could easily be such a moment (at least for my boyfriend).

I think I made the right decision, however I feel miserable (serves me right I guess) and the other bloke apparently feels miserable too.

At least my boyfriends seems a lot more upbeat and happy.

[justaguy]

Final update to this thread. We are now one month further and my boyfriend seems to be his usual self again, upbeat and caring.

The other bloke apparently had it rough, he claims he cried for a week, and refused to even talk to me during that time. When I returned to BKK I managed to talk to him on my second day (about 10 days after the breakup) and since then we talk again. In fact we started chatting again, but now just as friends, so the content of that chat I could easily show my boyfriend without worries.

On my last full evening he even went out party with us, just as before this whole saga. Yes he occasionally post messages on his facebook timeline in which he claims to want to be friends only, yet a few days later proclaims he misses me. I guess that is the way he ticks.

We now chat daily again, but less messages and no I love you or want to sleep with you.

Maybe just maybe this saga does have a happy ending, I might not have deserved it, but it seems it is under control.

I just have to say that I still love the other bloke, and I don't think he will be forgotten anytime soon, chat or no chat. In fact, when I did broke up, he wasn't the only one hurt, by breaking up with him, I have hurt myself too.

Now I want to concentrate on my boyfriend and give him the love and attention he most definitely deserves.

[Brad the Impala]

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

[justaguy]

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Yeah, of course some persons don't see the point in taking revenge. I have come clean, I told my boyfriend everything, if he didn't want to be with me, he would have stayed in Laos, but he returned to BKK and our country with me, so I don't think that revenge will ever happen.

But what do I know right ? Been with the bloke for over 12 years

[oldfarang]

Well good for you, SEEMS all will be OK.

Just keep in mind that it is not over. WHY?

Your BF (12 years) is Asian and Asians eat their emotions away, until they one time explode. It will happen, over something small non-related, maybe next month, year(s).

You should also cut all contact with the other guy, by chat/internet. It will keep his and your feelings intact, while you should get over them, which takes time best done in silence.

Good luck and glad you got such a great understanding BF. He deserves better, so either you get BETTER or set him free.

[justaguy]

Well good for you, SEEMS all will be OK.

Just keep in mind that it is not over. WHY?

Your BF (12 years) is Asian and Asians eat their emotions away, until they one time explode. It will happen, over something small non-related, maybe next month, year(s).

You should also cut all contact with the other guy, by chat/internet. It will keep his and your feelings intact, while you should get over them, which takes time best done in silence.

Good luck and glad you got such a great understanding BF. He deserves better, so either you get BETTER or set him free.

Not all Asians are the same. This particular Asian has never eaten his emotions away, he is more direct in his emotions than many westerners, in fact in that department I am much more Asian than him. The other bloke, yeah typical Asian, including the inability to talk about his emotions. Just half an hour ago, he video called me, we talk and at the end he mentioned the fact that he was so hurt by me, any attempt to talk more about the subject are in vain.

Yes you are right, my boyfriend AND the other bloke deserve better. And I will try to get better for my boyfriend's sake.

I am planning on drastically cut down the contact with the other bloke, even though compared to just one month ago, it is already drastically cut.

[fountainhall]

I have quite enjoyed the way this story has developed, despite my view that justaguy has been playing a somewhat dangerous game with the feelings and emotions of his BF. Yet now, as often in some previous posts, his reasoning is a bit suspect. On the one hand he says this -

Now I want to concentrate on my boyfriend and give him the love and attention he most definitely deserves.

- and in the next post he all but contradicts himself with this -

I am planning on drastically cut down the contact with the other bloke, even though compared to just one month ago, it is already drastically cut.

Forget the moral dilemma crap and all the dramas of the last few weeks. Just ditch the other guy right now! Whyever would you want to keep in touch with him? Makes zero sense after all you have written. I suppose the only reason not to is to give us more episodes of this continuing melodrama in the next few days.

[justaguy]

I ditched the other guy four weeks ago, but fail to see why we can't be friends. Remember, I have been friends with him for five years.

And of course my feelings for him have not magically disappeared. Yesterday he video called me (first time since breakup) and I do know he feels the same.

But we made a deal, no boyfriend bollocks anymore, I intend to keep that promise, let's see if he can do the same. If not there might be another episode this December

Joke, not going to go through all that again..