America's Presidential Election Blues

[fountainhall]

I'm not an American. But as an observer, am I the only one sick and tired of a Presidential election campaign which has already lasted more than 6 months and still has more than a whoie 8 months to go? All to elect someone for a mere 4 years? I find the two party system results in a constant "I'm right!" "No, you're fucking wrong and I'm right" mentality that is just so boring. I find the amounts of money permitted to be spent utterly obscene and almost certainly corrupt. I find it amazing that as the number 1 economy with the most influence, good and bad, over the world, the country's foreign policy plays such an insignificant part of the debate when it is America along with it allies which has been responsible for the disastrous multi-decade policy in Vietnam and the even more disastrous multi-decade destabilisation of huge chunks of the Middle East.

I find it extraordinary that so many people are presently placing their faith in two men, the first of whom is a loud-mouth celebrity industrialist whose utterances indicate he knows precious little about politics and even less about international diplomacy, and the second of whom will be 75 by November and who, however admirable his policies, equally has almost zero experience in foreign affairs. Yet both would have their fingers on the nuclear trigger.

Americans clearly have the right to whichever electoral system they want. Why I get pissed off is that every single news and comment programme on international media channels forces this down non-Americans throats. I can't help comparing this with the British system where the electoral period is merely a matter of a couple of months or so, where each candidate is legally able to spend less than around $50,000 and political parties for the most recent election spent less than $50 million.

Please, give us a break!

[christianpfc]

Found this funny piece which has a relation to the subject:
https://itzhakts.wordpress.com/2011/...-independence/

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II In light of your failure to financially manage yourselves and inability to effectively govern yourselves responsibly, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up ‘revocation’ in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, David William Donald Cameron, will appoint a Governor for the former United States of America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated sometime next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You will learn that the suffix ˜burgh” is pronounced “burra”; you may elect to spell Pittsburgh as ˜Pittsberg” if you find you simply can’t cope with correct pronunciation. Then look up “aluminum” and check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it.
2. The letter “U” will be reinstated in words such as ˜colour”, “favour” and “neighbour”. Likewise, you will learn to spell “doughnut” without skipping half the letters.
3. Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels (look up “vocabulary”). Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as “like” and “you know” is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.
4. There is no such thing as “US English”. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter “u”.
5. You will relearn your original national anthem, “God Save The Queen”, but only after fully carrying out Task #1 (see above).
6. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.
7. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you’re not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults and then used solely for shooting grouse. If you’re not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you’re not ready to handle a gun, let alone shoot grouse.
8. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. A permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.
9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and this is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean.
10. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.
11. The former United States of America will adopt the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland prices on petrol (which you have been calling “gasoline”) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.
12. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French Fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with malt vinegar.
13. Waiters and waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.
14. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling “beer” is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. New Zealand beer is also acceptable, as New Zealand is pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth – see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat’s Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.
15. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one’s ears removed with a cheese grater.
16. You will cease playing “American” Football. There are only two kinds of proper football; one you call soccer, and rugby. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American Football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies or Jessies – English slangs for effeminate males and blouses for big girls respectively).
17. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the “World Series” for a game which is not played outside of the United States of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket.
18. You must tell us who killed JFK. It’s been driving us mad.
19. An inland revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty’s Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).
20. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

Thank you for your cooperation.

[Yraen]

Well done Christian. (The following is all said 'tongue-in-cheek'. OK?)

There are, of course, many other linguistic atrocities that could be added to this list.
Gotten ... do you remember the joke about the USian who had got.ten tickets to the theatre - his wife rang and invited 8 friends.

The USian universal laziness of "off of" - translated from 'off from' (where the "from" is redundant) - meaning descend, alight, leave, obtain, buy, be given, awarded, achieved and many other more suitable verbs. Similarly, 'would of' in lieu of 'would have'.

Please, never, ever, suggest the USian primary and high school "education system" works.