Bali and KL Trip Report

[steveky]

The original Modena was long time on Monkey Forest Road

I loved the original Modena. It was beautiful, and they used to call the boys from Milano to come down and do the work. IтАЩm sad that it is no more.

Where do you eat in Ubud, Caf├й des Artistes up on Jln. Bisma is generally the 1st choice of the brotherhood, and best value in Ubud. Incredible fine dining at Cascades, great Euro-Asian at Lamak, best Indo at Warung Enak...it is all in http://www.balieats.com

Thanks Danny тАУ I didnтАЩt know about http://www.balieats.com. Will definitely use this in future тАУ great resource. I love Caf├й des Artistes, but no visit this trip as I had a list of new restaurants to try out. Have been тАУ and will continue to тАУ posting/post re all restaurants in each dayтАЩs report. I have had some outstanding meals in Bali this trip. Really only had one dud meal. God, the food is good. Although getting more expensiveтАж but ainтАЩt everything?

Appreciate the tips mate.

[danny99]

тАУ I didnтАЩt know about http://www.balieats.com. Will definitely use this in future тАУ great resource. I have had some outstanding meals in Bali this trip. Really only had one dud meal. God, the food is good. Although getting more expensiveтАж but ainтАЩt everything?.

More expensive...all is relevant...prices are still less than half of Sydney, and the quality and variety of choice rivals there as well. Forgot to mention Hujan Locale, sensational new Ubud place from Will Meyrick [MamaSan and Sarong], ex Longrain in Sydney but way better!

But beware the tourists traps, raves on that degusting Trip Advisor [suburban working class women showing off]...from memory most of the real Top 10 in Ubud are not in the Top 50 of TA.....and always avoid key words like 'organic'...paying more for what isn't?

BTW BaliEats also sends out a free monthly newsletter, great info on what is new in Bali.

[steveky]

Hey Danny

Yeah, literally stumbled across Hujan Locale, only to have a mate recommend it hours later. We didn't up getting there, but it is so on next year's list.

As you rightly say, it is all relative, and I need to remember that. Favourite meal involves duck... but more about this in a later post!

[steveky]

Day 7

We changed hotels today - thank god. The pool of the last place was the only thing going for it. We love our new homestay - the family are absolutely delightful and being there has lifted the whole feeling of the trip immediately. As I mentioned earlier, I will post details of this place, as it really was remarkable.

Time to go down to the coast and check out a massage place or two. I'd researched a couple, but preferred to pay it by ear. There was one in Legian where I'd never failed to get a touch up. Let's see if it could be replicated.

Of course, I muffed it up right royally. Now that I am writing, I realise that there are two places on this one road that have proven forthcoming in recent years. One is passable in the fit-out, the other is a dive, but one guy who works in the dive is extremely accommodating. They are separated by another massage place that I had never been into before.

I went to the first one, and there was only one girl sitting outside. So I moved along and the next salon (that I had not been to previously) had maybe 15 staff outside including a couple of guys. I said to one of them you massage, and he nodded. While I'm perusing the menu, a guy comes out the front of the first salon and start beckoning to me to come over. It's clear as hell he's family - but he was not really my cup of tea. So I ignored him. I choose the 2 hour massage, and then this guy hands me over to another guy. Whoa! But as it happened, the new bloke is marginally cuter, so my indignation is short-lived.

He was a stocky little bloke from the north of Bali with arms to die for. And he had a good touch. But no suggestion of anything untoward. Sigh. He also shortchanged me on time, so that said goodbye to his tip. Moron.

I walked out and the guy that I used to go to was outside the third place (the dive), telling me that he had been trying to get my attention before. I had not noticed, to my eternal disappointment. What a waste of a massage arvo.

We ended up at Skygarden (this would be a truly remarkable club anywhere in the world... that it exists in Bali is extraordinary) and they had an (approx) 250 baht all you could drink and eat for 4 hours deal going. Needless to say, a good time was had by all. And the clientele were very easy on the eye. Not too mention one of the security staff who was very friendly. Not as friendly as I would have liked, but friendly nonetheless.

[steveky]

Day 8

Sort of a lazy day - but the goals remain the same: eat, drink and get pummelled.

We lunched at Laka Leke, a curious place. It's spread out pavillions of different sizes, and a choice of sitting on cushions at low tables, or normal tables and chairs. The set-up appears to be around a twice weekly dance/show they do. The problem with it as a set-up is that you are a-ways from the kitchen, and staff have a torrid time managing this. This makes for manic service, and in fact that was probably our only criticism - the service. It was harried and rushed and no attention to detail - and when things quietened down, they made seemed to want us to finish up too. This was silly as they weren't closing. In any case, I was going nowhere... I was reading a book, and my only desire in the world was to be brought endless beers.

Food was pretty good - including a deconstructed Gado-Gado. Curious, but it worked (despite the lack of crackers).

Regrettably there were no cute staff.

That was a long long lunch (about half a book's worth) and we retired for a nap, before heading out to Modena which had rebadged itself as Modena Male Spa by Milano some time earlier in the year. It had also changed locations as its old site which really was excellent was being redeveloped, we think into a hotel. This was the business that I had mentioned in conversations with Danny earlier.

The new location was in the north-west, just 100 metres past the Bintang Supermarket that is a bit of a landmark in the area.

When we arrived we noticed that word "Male" on the banner outside the premises had been covered up - curious, given the rebranding appeared to have happened in only the last 6 months. I went in that there were no male masseurs on staff. So the receptionist directed me to Sedona, which was directly behind Modena not-so-male Spa.

This facility was interestingly fitted out. The rooms had shown a lot of design nous with four poster canopies, a shower, a claw foot bath, and an outside garden with pond. However, the pond was empty, and the walls only half finished, mostly ugly Besser blocks with a bad cement job. It was curious.

I booked the 90 minute massage, and my masseur was somewhat cute, but nothing to get excited about. I disregarded the dreaded paper undies, and as a result the masseur did spend a lot of time on my arse. But he was also a little bit light of touch, so I can't say that it was amazingly satisfying. And he didn't get near enough to the secret cave entrance that would have afforded him a tip.

Oh and they add sales tax onto the price, but I did not recall seeing this on the price sheet. This is cheap and lazy at best, and underhanded at worst.

Can't say I'll be returning. Another dud in the titilation stakes. Have I used up all my good karma points, and being rewarded by god now for my bad?

[steveky]

Day 9

Starting to get super lazy now. The homestay in which we find ourselves serves up gargantuan breakfasts so most days we don't eat lunch until 2pm or 3pm, and then skip dinner. It's pretty well stuffed up our plans to cross two eateries off the wish list each day.

Today saw us go to Warung Pulau Kelapa, an eatery with an impressive menu despite many things being "Discontinue". We started with Chicken Satay Bumbu Rica-Rica - satay with chilli and onion topping. Spicy and delicious.

Then we had the Pastel Ayam - chook and carrots and supposedly rice noodles, but I couldn't make them out, wrapped in a "savoury flour coating and friedтАЭ. It tasted of pretty much nothing at all. Next: Kroket - mashed potato filled with chook ragout and coated in breadcrumbs before being fried. It was not as ordinary as the Pastel Ayam, but it sure wouldn't set the world on fire.

Finally we ordered Tahu Gejrot or as the menu described it "Pulverised fried tofu with spices typical of Indonesia". I think tofu is a waste of space, but the sauce, the spices referred to in the menu description were exceptional. Pity it wasn't meat.

Staff were disinterested at best, and our waitress had the personality of a bicycle with two flat tires.

But we stayed there until many beers had been dispensed with. And upon leaving I declared it time for my daily massage. I suggested that we go to Milano, the site of some shenanigans just days before. The bf was having none of it, and instead took me to the stupidly named Daisy Spa.

Admittedly the sole guy working was pretty handsome. He had a whole sleeve tattoo up one arm, which doesn't do much for me - but the rest of the package was pretty fine.

The facility he works in was not. Wanted to have a shower - no water. No water even to flush the toilet. The rooms were small - so small that he actually had to move the massage table to get to the other side. And there was only a curtain for a door... and the "spa" (never more of a misnomer than for this place) was noisy as all fuck.

So to the massage. It could almost be described as harried. I don't think he scrimped on the time, but the strokes were quick and frenzied. And that wasn't the worst of it. This bloke must have been a brickie's labourer in his last profession because his hands were as rough as guts. Truly like sandpaper. I do not know why I didn't leave after the first 30 seconds. Perhaps it was the anticipation that something might happen. All pointers should have indicated that it would not happen. Especially given that the bf picked it.

This was actually the second worst massage of my life. The worst was a girl in Cambodia, and I did leave half-way through that one. She was also the last girl ever to massage me.

[catawampuscat]

Thanks for the clarification Steve. There are farangs who give full control of their money to the bf.

[steveky]

Day 10

We started off today lazily. I wasn't speaking to the bf on account of his sabotaging my massage last night, and told him that I would spend today alone. This in turn led to him being strangely deferential today... hmmm. Should I be worried? Or should this be a tactic that I employ more oftenтАж?

When we finally got off our lazy arses we went to one eatery that had long be on the list: Run's Warung, followed by some juices at a wholefood place called Clear which had an amazing outlook, nice juices and pretty outrageous service charges. Can't say I'll be returning. To Clear that isтАж Run's Warung is fabulous with amazing local dishes at local prices.

Anyway, that was all just a fill-in for the main event of the day: a return to the gorgeous man with the Cadbury's dairy milk chocolate skin. I'd also booked the bf in for the same two hour treatment I was having - but with a female masseur. I was not trying to be nasty, it was his choice.

What can I say? It was a dream come true. Everything I had hoped for and more. His attentions were worthy of the tip that he ended up getting, a good tip in Bali (but a fraction of what one would have to pay in BKK).

And not so much as a sneaking suspicion from the "trouble and strife".

[danny99]

Oh and they add sales tax onto the price, but I did not recall seeing this on the price sheet. This is cheap and lazy at best, and underhanded at worst.

It is not sales tax but what you call GST [VAT or TVA depending on the country] . The 10% should be added, separately, to almost every bill you get in Bali [rest, hotel, spa]. There is no need to state it as everyone knows, except Aussies of course who are used to the price shown being all inclusive [unlike the rest of the world who do it like Bali]. If they were to show an all inclusive amount on your bill they would then have to pay 10% tax on the TOTAL of that, so paying the tax twice. Any place that does not add the GST, is obviously not paying it, so they are illegal. However if a service charge is added then that [and the %] should be stipulated on the price list.

You did not say who your therapist was at Sedona? Do not dismiss any place by the non action of one particular guy...they are not brothels, it is up to any individual therapist to offer extra or not, in Ubud area maybe 50% of the boys do, but they are not recruited as such. Of course in the Kerobokan area, [M, M2, Banana, Young Generation, Adam's Apple, etc. etc] they are mostly just simple brothels with minimum tip rules as all offer sex...so no exploring of the unknown, which for me is half the excitement, not knowing what [or who] is coming next?

[steveky]

Nope, can't say I remember the name of the boy at Sedona. He was not really memorable. I will try to be more diligent in future!