wow!!!..I never realised you were so insecure...apologies if that sounds too personal....but it almost seems like you gotta grow balls...or at least let them descend!! The "boys"are there for you...to serve you...to please you...to be enjoyed....!!!! Thats what they are there for...thats why they do up their hair....shave their arses....some even come pre-lubed!!!!!
I walk in super confident...often already excited at full mast....mentally I'm the boss.....I take my time making a selection...and the massage has gotta end up in anal.....I always check before hand!!! The massage is simply foreplay......honetly buckyboy...i would be devastated at the waste of a trip if I behaved like you.
Again apologies for my strong viewpoint...but snap out of it!!