We met at a social gathering, in a group but soon found ourselves talking one to one. Despite his bonhomie, it was clear that something was troubling Ake. This slim and attractive 22 year old was friendly but though his smile was frequent, his eyes betrayed a sadness that he could not hide. His body language was nervous, edgy and there were some suspicious marks on his arms. Gentle small talk turned into a few dead ends but there was something about him that revealed that, deep down, he did want to open up. When he did, his story was tragic.
Ake was a country boy who had moved to the city in order to work in his sisterтАЩs massage shop and it was here that he met an Englishman who invited him out for dinner. Then aged 18, the young man was impressed by the fancy restaurant and even more impressed by the foreignerтАЩs modern and well-appointed house, situated far outside the city. Several dates followed and they became a couple. Soon, Ake had moved into the house and pledged to тАШtake careтАЩ. He had no savings and no income apart from the pocket money he was given but the man was kind and, maybe for the first time in his young life, Ake felt secure.
As is the way with these arrangements, a domestic routine was soon established. They got up quite early in the morning and Ake would prepare breakfast after which the man, in his early sixties, would spend a few hours on his computer while Ake cleaned the house, watered the garden and prepared lunch. The man would always take a nap during the afternoon and Ake passed the time on the computer, keeping in touch with his young Thai friends via Facebook. At the stroke of 4 pm, he would make some tea and knock on the bedroom door, which was kept locked during the siesta- he never understood why but asked no questions.
This continued for four years and all was well until one afternoon, the knock on the bedroom door was unanswered. Tears welled up in AkeтАЩs big brown eyes as he told me what happened next. His slim frame met solid resistance from the door but it eventually yielded and the man looked like he was asleep. He was dead. A heart attack was AkeтАЩs guess. He smoked too much, drank too much and took little exercise. Ake had never seen a corpse before and he really did not know what to do. His mind was confused, he was scared, and there were no friends nearby. Then he remembered that the man had a brother in England and the number was in the dead manтАЩs phone.
Crying, he made the call and broke the news. The brother demanded to know who he was. Ake told him and did not understand why the man was shouting but did get that he would be in Thailand on the next available flight. It was three days before the taxi drew up outside the house and disgorged the man, his wife and his sister. Three days with just food from the cupboards as Ake could not drive the car. Three days of crying and worry about what would happen. Had he done something wrong? Three days of sharing the house with a dead man. Three days of terror.
It was more than unfortunate that the manтАЩs family had no idea that their dead relative was gay. They refused to believe that Ake was his partner and abused him for suggesting it. It was more than unfortunate that there was no will. They threw Ake out onto the street with a knapsack full of his clothes and just a couple of hundred baht in his pocket. He does not know what happened to the man, the house or the family. He does not know why he feels so guilty and has started to self-harm- explaining those marks on his arms. He does not question why the man made no provision for him. I do. Affection and a semblance of security are secondary to respect and responsibility. Is it not obvious that if you have a much younger lover that certain plans have to be made? And how can you tell a heartbroken boy like Ake that his lover was a thoughtless shit?
Reply With Quote
