Here's the low-down on Sihanoukville, and why it sucks as a gay destination (for now).

I'm a local, 41, my guy is 19 (what can I say... I enjoy the finer things!).

There are zero gay bars in town, except for the hotel bar at Cheers, which is fairly dead all the time. The problem with Cheers is, it's far away from everything. People here are very localized, and anything further than a two-minute moto ride from Serendipity/Ochheuteal is generally too far. Cheers would be a lot more busy if it were closer to where most people go. The B-Zone was open for a while, but it was poorly run, and did not have a reputation befitting to a place where gay men would go to hook up... the staff would smile and flirt (it's their job), but the place did not attract any "money boys", which I know would have drawn in a lot more customers.

Khmer guys are amazing - the problem is they are far shier than Thais.. keeping this in mind, Pattaya, where general human complacence leads most to go to the numerous bars and go-gos to hook up does not happen here. Basically, what most people do is hang out at beach bars during the day (most have boys working in them), until you see someone you like. Most respond well to winks and smiles, and eventually you'll elicit a positive response, and take it from there.... then there's the ID issue.

Most beach boys don't have ID cards because they are from the villages - which presents a problem for those who like young (18-20). Getting ID cards are not easy - they have to go to their home village, get the "family book", if one exists, and take it to the provincial capital, where it will take up to 6 months unless a bribe of $20-50 is given to "speed things along". Quite a change from Thailand where 99% of guys have ID. It took me three months, a trip to the village and $40 to get my fella's ID.

Besides the obvious reasons for needing ID are the NGO's that plague Cambodia. Believe me, they will spy on foreign men in the company of *anyone* that may be underage (since they DO look much younger than they are). They're ruthless and have nothing else to do - so make sure any companions have ID on them.

Another issue are two types of people who visit - both equally hostile: 1) Gap-year backpacking girls, who judge anyone who is not a gap-year backpacker, and 2) The ex-Pattaya Soi Buakao crowd - the grupy, fat old straight men who hate anyone who doesn't have a Man-U tattoo on their head and spend all day drinking Chang at beer bars.

If anyone is wondering why I live here under such conditions - it's a long story, but I'm quite happy, have a good fella, and a group of good friends. It's an interesting place to be sure... just not the easiest place for fun unless you're willing to invest some time and money. Phnom Penh is a much better bet if you're looking to hook up - then take them to Sihanoukville.