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Life in Thailand - Test Results
I started planning/preparing for retirement 5 years prior to that magic date to make sure I had all bases covered and now find myself extremely grateful that I dedicated the amount of time that I did. Working in my favor was the fact that I knew without question that Thailand was the place I wanted to retire and after spending nearly two decades of routine holidays in Thailand I had all the information I needed for retirement planning purposes.
Similar to what most people do - my panning included; long-term financial considerations, health & safety considerations, logistics (where to live based on the lifestyle I wanted for myself after retirement), transportation needs, bank account(s), health insurance, visa maintenance, living arrangements (buy versus rent), and of course risk management as it pertains to all of these things.
I spent 5 years planning, and have now completed 5 years of living here full-time which I’ll refer to as the “test phase”. Fortunately, due to a lot of planning and a good tail wind, I’m happy to say that overall things have worked out remarkably well with no regrets.
My love affair with Thailand spans a little over two decades now with no signs of slowing and I still, as I’ve been saying all these years, contend that there’s no better place on earth for a gay man to hang his hat than Thailand. The cost-of-living is one of the lowest in the modern world…good health care…lots of sun…lots of skin…lots of boys and boy bars…plenty of places to take exotic side-trips, and, most importantly, the opportunity for the like-minded to enjoy sexual relations and romance with guys, who, before experiencing Thailand, only existed in your dreams.
One thing I’ve learned is that there’s a significant difference between coming here as a routine sex tourist for holidays and living here full-time. This is something I considered during the planning phase once I determined the type of lifestyle I wanted after retirement. I wasn’t interested in “going native” and living out in some remote jungle village (been there–done that), nor did I want to remain a bar-runner/boy chaser bouncing around from one penis to the next any more (been there-done that too). The vision of how I saw myself living after retirement became crystal clear to me after a while.
I chose the “Little House on the Prairie” lifestyle to force myself to focus more on health than I did before…small town (Bang Saray) on the sea…sidewalks roll-up at 10:00 PM…clear skies (and water)…and nothing but the sounds of the oceans waves and birds chirping at night…but also close enough to the gay scene in Pattaya when so inclined, etc. The perfect choice for me. Admittedly, having a terrific partner like Jai makes this all work. He’s a dream (literally) and I’m so fortunate to have hooked up with him.
My visits to the bar scene are rare, and when I do visit it’s mainly to rub elbows with friends - pinch a few cute butts - and just enjoy the camaraderie. Other than that, the best of anything I can experience is waiting for me back at home. This is probably the most pronounced difference between “tourist” and “resident”. When you live here year-round “time” is not a concern…and I think a lot of expats realize this shortly after they retire. There’s no more counting down the days on the calendar for that dreaded departure date – when paradise comes to an end and reality takes its place.
It’s also common for expats to have their own cadre of regular boys they spend time with who they can just call on the phone when in the mood, and/or have live-in Thai boyfriends, versus having to rely on the bars or apps. The best example of this is when you go to gay scene like Jomtien Complex and see the majority of expats more interested in just socializing than they are boy-chasing. In short, boy-chasing is for the tourists. Expats don’t have to chase.
Pitfalls to Avoid:
- Don’t plan anything until you can actually visualize the lifestyle you want after retirement
- Never implement the plan until you’re sure you meet the financial income requirements.
- Don’t ignore the aging factor as your needs will inevitably change with time.
- Forget living in the boonies. You’re an old gay man from the West – not Tarzan.
- Obtain a good Thai health insurance policy before age 70 if possible.
- Don’t squander all of your hard-earned money on #14. Just tip for sex and be done with it.
- And, as my old friend Carolina Jim would say, “Never fall in love with a whore”.
Mai pen rai
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Great synopsis Dodger,
I would say that your expatriation into Thailand success is a model to us to aspire towards.
I am 18 months into my new expat life here in Thailand (Jomtien) and I only prepared 2 years prior for my retirement and move to Thailand.
Some general comments and observations:
1.) What is really needed is a how-to-retire successfully blog for Thailand with a specific section for Pattaya. The Supertown web page has a blog section but it has not been updated since June 2023 https://gaysupertown.blogspot.com/ it would be great if there could be a sub-blog section within this blog for retirement and which discusses how to become a successful expat in Thailand.
2.) What is missing is a type of "Welcome Wagon" system https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dic.../welcome-wagon that would be for the newcomers to meet with the already existing expats who live here - to help integrate into their new expat daily life and to make some new friends. Once a month would probably be a good idea. Many of the expat heterosexual groups here in Pattaya have these in place (PCEC, PEC, Buzzin Pattaya bar crawl, etc.) and they seem to function very well - as they make the newbies to Pattaya feel welcome and accelerate the process to find like minded friends.
--> many times some of the visiting forum members have requested for a meetup but it seems that it is difficult to find the right time and/or meeting place for many of us to agree to meet
After 18 months here, I see that it is fairly easy to make Thai friends but very difficult to make farang friends who have common interests. I have been invited to hang out with some farangs - but there was more often than not a BIG emphasis on drinking and staying out late - which unfortunately I am not really into. So, I still try to find farangs that don't put so much pressure on having to drink and to do things outside of the bars.
Unfortunately, after a while, the Jomtien Supertown Complex mantra of "farang sit and farang drink" gets real boring because the minute that I sit down I become lethargic and then add alcohol into the mix and I become sleepy and bored. If only there was a place in the Supertown complex where we could stand up and dance before midnight to classics from the 70s, 80s, 90s, and 2,000s.
I have been taken to the weekly Bingo on Wednesdays - but I find it really boring - so hopefully somebody will invent something more exciting to do in the Supertown complex then the current "farang sit and farang drink" business model.
I would be interested to hear what others think ?
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
I've really enjoyed reading both these posts...thank you
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Thanks guys, fascinating.
I was contemplating relocation in 2004. Everything had fallen into place for such a move- the death of my remaining parent, the strength of the pound and, most of all, after nine years of happily playing the field without wanting a relationship, I'd suddenly fallen in love.
i didn't move due to cultural and political reasons. However, today, as I post from Jomtien after an enjoyable stay in Samui and looking forward to dinner tonight with my partner of twenty years, I am aware that, a week from now, I'll be packing for my return home,
And I really, truly and honestly question my decision.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
it doesnt have to be a permanent decision...Ive met many who rent out their houses back in their home countries so they always have a place to go back to should the situation change
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Excellent post by Dodger with essential tips there for many of us. I have never visited Bang Saray but it does sound like an ideal place for retirement provided one has transport (never driven a motorcycle) and a long-term partner. For the rest of us I guess the question is Pattaya or Bangkok. I used to love Chiang Mai but the gay scene in general has gone massively downhill in the last decade I have ruled it out. Obviously I exclude the apps which I would everywhere. If you like to meet up with guys you have never seen before and who may or may not look like their photos/profiles, they're fine. But like some posters, I like to see who I am going to spend some time with. So the bars for me are important.
But I moved to Thailand only in part for the boys - the Thai boys of whom like others I have fond memories stretching back many years. I did not want Lao, Vietnamese or Cambodian boys, even though I know many can be great. And increasingly this seems to mean the apps. A gay scene and a more lilberal lifestyle was only a part of the reason for moving. I have other interests, like sight-seeing, local culture, concerts both pop and classical, meeting like-minded guys who might become friends, occasional travel to learn more about neighbouring countries - and so on. I found Pattaya just did not work for me. Yes, I like a nice beach but I prefer many others in Thailand to those in and near Pattaya and I don't have to live by one.
So I selected Bangkok. Finding a condo iin a quiet area was difficult but with help I found a nice affordable one. Being based in Bangkok gives me much of what I want and I enjoy it. It's not perfect, but where is? Perhaps Dodger put it best, "One thing I’ve learned is that there’s a significant difference between coming here as a routine sex tourist for holidays and living here full-time." How very true!
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
bkkmfj2648
........After 18 months here, I see that it is fairly easy to make Thai friends but very difficult to make farang friends who have common interests......
I guess a lot of this hinges on what your common interests are.
Believe me, you're not alone in this category as one of the biggest complaints I hear from some (not all) expats is that they're bored-to-death in the daytime. And most of the expats I know don't have a large cadre of expats friends either. Most of their social interactions with other expats either happen around the bars at night - or sometimes early morning breakfast chats with a few other expats they know. That's about it.
That said, visiting the gay scene at night seems like a great way to start some new friendships regardless if you drink or not - seeing as the majority of expats you see on the scene are there for the very same reason, i.e. social interactions and building new friendships.
Also, using this forum as a way to generate some common interests among other members isn't a bad idea either. Just because the last "Meet & Greet" didn't work out doesn't mean it won't work in the future. We had a Sawatdee Meet & Greet arranged years ago at the original Memories Cafe/Sunee and a handful of members showed up, but not until after we moved the meeting date around a dozen times. The owners of Memories (Jack, Ralph & Oud) told me later that night that if they would have laid out free food and hung up balloons the place would have been packed...555.
On a personal note, for me, having a partner certainly takes the edge off the need for having social interactions with others. I still enjoy (and need) those interactions so don't get me wrong, but we do everything together...enjoy our own individual hobbies which fills most hours in the day... have each other to share with...reflect with...joke with...share meals with...debate with...laugh with...enjoy sex with...and love with. Ironically, we first met on GayRomeo and in both of our profiles we had posted "Looking for Friends" as our interest. Funny with how that fits with the conversation we're having now.
Your suggestion about there being some sort of "Welcoming" process for new gay expats is an excellent one.
My wheels are turning.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
A Pattaya expat walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a bottle of the hard stuff. Soon a few of the bar boys join him. They play on their phones, as does he. He pays the bin, tips them and goes home.
The next night he does the same thing.
He does this night after night until he either has no money left or no liver.
Dodgers success is very much the minority result for full time expats.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Around 25 years ago on a visit to Bangkok, friends took me to one of the regular meetings of the Long Yang Club. Basically for expats and Thais who enjoyed the company of expats, I seem to remember it was held in a house very close of the Malaysia Hotel. It was if I again recall correctly just a social gathering with drinks, small eats and lots of chat. Ratio of expats to Thais seemed to be around 2 to 1. It seems the Bangkok Club ceased operating quite some time ago. I think that's a pity because it was an ideal place to gather and get to know people who might become friends. Living in Thailand I try not to become cocooned in an expat ghetto.
I know there were similarly named clubs in various parts of the world. Anyone know if they still exist?
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
I note Arsenal's posting and suspect that he'hit the nail on the head.Perhaps the key to Dodger's success is that he was in a ltr before becoming an expat.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Oliver2
I note Arsenal's posting and suspect that he 'hit the nail on the head. Perhaps the key to Dodger's success is that he was in a ltr before becoming an expat.
I think Arsenal hit the nail on the head as well.
One of the many things I love about Thailand is that we have the options.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Ltr not so important, the number of unfortunate balcony deaths demonstrates that.
I think it's all to do with the individuals mindset. For a start say godbye to the excitement and thrill of Pattaya as experienced by myself and say Gerefan or Latin. The adult Disneyland will lose its sparkle and if you're not very careful become a source of constant irritation.
Myself, I think a happy retirement involves doing lots and lots of little things. A rolling buffet if you will of things you do on an ad hoc basis when the mood takes you.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
bkkmfj2648
After 18 months here, I see that it is fairly easy to make Thai friends but very difficult to make farang friends who have common interests.
We might have a different idea what constitutes as "friend", but I have few to no Thai friends, but many Farang friends. Most of them gay, but many not on the forums. I have just too little shared interests with Thais to go beyond fun and fringe activities.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
arsenal
I think it's all to do with the individuals mindset. For a start say godbye to the excitement and thrill of Pattaya as experienced by myself and say Gerefan or Latin. The adult Disneyland will lose its sparkle and if you're not very careful become a source of constant irritation.
you.
You are quite right Arsenal, Pattaya was full of excitement on my first and early visits over the last 20 years.
What one has to take into account is the fact that everything is now completely familiar and can become boring. One Gogo bar is much the same as another.
Also over that time we have all got a little older, and our interests change.
I personally find a 3 month visit over the European winter and a month in the summer are sufficient and realise when it is time to go home.
If I was thinking of living in Thailand as well as the lack of things to do during the day I could not live in a condo permanently. Not after living in a house all my life!
I would need a nice place, but that would mean living a long way from the “entertainment”.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
christianpfc
We might have a different idea what constitutes as "friend", but I have few to no Thai friends, but many Farang friends. Most of them gay, but many not on the forums. I have just too little shared interests with Thais to go beyond fun and fringe activities.
Then we are definitely living opposite lives. With my Thai friends, I have gone to:
Koh Larn x 4,
Koh Samet x 2,
Koh Chang,
Phitsanulok,
Sukhothai
Thanks to my Thai friends I have been able to participate in the volleyball events at Dongtan beach (near the Sea Rescue facility). The Thai guys that I met here were the primary reasons why I was able to travel with them to the above list of places. Furthermore, thanks to these friends I have been exposed to the Thai-on-Thai network of masseurs and escorts - which are different than the ones that we mainly see in Grindr.
Then there is my small group of Thai friends who work within the walls of Supertown - and this has been a very eye opening experience as I get to see how the Thais see us farangs who frequent the Jomtien Complex. When these guys organize small house parties - often I am the only farang in attendance.
Alternatively, my experiences with fellow farangs is almost nil as I often don't have much in common with what they want to do - in that I get bored with the "farang sit - farang drink" modus operandi.
There is so much more to do in Thailand....
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
bkkmfj....care to elaborate on your comment.....whats the difference..." I have been exposed to the Thai-on-Thai network of masseurs and escorts - which are different than the ones that we mainly see in Grindr."
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Comparing tourists with retired expats is like comparing apples with oranges. I think it makes more sense to compare the differences between farang who retire in their home country versus choosing to retire in Thailand - because that's really where the tire meets the road.
I think any expat that lives in Thailand would agree wholeheartedly that life in Thailand beats the alternative, but what does that really mean? It's better...great...but then why do so many expats seem so bored, bitter, and depressed?
I really hate saying this because there's certainly a lot of very friendly positive - thinking expats over here - but about half of them act like they they have a piece of barbed-wire stuck up their ass. Always complaining...never a smile...pontificating...everything's wrong...they're constantly being inconvenienced by the world around them...the music's too loud...the price of eggs went up two baht...the boy who showed up at their door had a slight mustache that wasn't visible in his picture on Grindr.,,Oh My God! Why don't they just shut up once in a while and give everybody a break.
So, I guess the question is; Will you automatically have an amazing life filled with joy and happiness when you retire in Thailand? Based on everything I've seen so far you have about a 50/50 chance.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
The other night I attended a gathering of 10 farang and 4 Thais at a local bar in Pattaya. In this case most of those who were there were familiar with one another unlike the "lets get together and meet-greet". Easy to arrange, just provide some food, get a semi-commitment from the attendees and, voila, everyone had a good time.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
latintopxxx
bkkmfj....care to elaborate on your comment.....whats the difference..." I have been exposed to the Thai-on-Thai network of masseurs and escorts - which are different than the ones that we mainly see in Grindr."
How I found out was as follows:
One of my Thai friends was lamenting that he did not have any customers recently.
I asked him to show me his social media profile - which was in Hornet - as he told me that is where he finds most of his Thai-on-Thai customers.
After I looked at his Hornet profile I said to him - but you need to put some words in English, Japanese, Chinese, or Korean if you want to attract foreigners as potential clients.
He replied - no - you do not understand - I only want Thai customers.
I was surprised. I asked how do you find each other in Hornet and then he showed me around 25 Hornet profiles that were Thai-on-Thai.
Then I could not resist and I said to him - but you let me be your customer sometimes - why is that? He replied, I did not meet you in Hornet I met you here on the beach at volleyball and you are a nice and fun guy so I allowed you to be an occasional customer.
But then I pushed back - but there are many more friendly farangs like me - if you would just modify your Hornet profile to some of the above mentioned foreign languages you could probably double your client base. He replied, no - it is too scary for most of us to do that as we don't know how to interface with farangs as they can be overwhelming. He said that the Thai clients already understand the Thai mentality.
So, this is how I discovered this entire Thai-on-Thai underworld.
Furthermore, it was one of their birthday's and I wanted to treat them to drinks after volleyball at my friends bar in Supertown.
Oh my GOD - what push back I go from some of the Thai volleyball guys.
They said that if they would enter into Supertown people might talk an think that they are - wait for it - escorts or host boys....
They said to me no way....
After much pleading with them and with some pushing from my other non-volleyball Thai friends - we did convince them to enter into Supertown and we had a GREAT time that night.
so, there are definitely 2 different worlds in the Thai world of how they look at and perceive things to be.....
The irony is if you meet one of the guest boys from most of the Supertown bars they generally don't have any shame to walk around with you to the other bars within the complex - but going outside of the medieval walls of the Supertown complex into the general public area - sometimes that can be a struggle.
So, you have Supertown guys who don't want to be seen with you outside of the Supertown complex walls and guys that you meet outside of the Supertown walls (i.e., like from volleyball on Jomtien beach) who dread to enter into the Supertown complex.
I find all of this amazing.
Since I want the fun of both worlds I accommodate depending on which group I am with....
thoughts?
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
actually i was exoecting something else...what u describe i already know...many tourists seem to think that Thailand is so gay friendly and whore friendly and so accepting.....truth is that the easy gay hooker world a tourist inhabits is very small and the service providers are held in contempt by the middle/upper classes...thye poor tolerate it as long as its kept in the gay ghetto and as long as the money keeps flowing...
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
latintopxxx
actually i was exoecting something else...what u describe i already know...many tourists seem to think that Thailand is so gay friendly and whore friendly and so accepting.....truth is that the easy gay hooker world a tourist inhabits is very small and the service providers are held in contempt by the middle/upper classes...thye poor tolerate it as long as its kept in the gay ghetto and as long as the money keeps flowing...
Spot on Latintopxxx,
When I first settled here in Jomtien in September 2022, a very sexy professional Thai guy (in administration in one of the local Pattaya hospitals) asked me out on a date. He told me that he would pay for me and that he would pick me up on his motorbike outside the beach gate of my condo on the Dongtan beach road. He drove me over to the Sands Cafe at the bottom of Pratumnak. It was a nice dinner and he paid for everything.
I saw a very nice ring on his finger and I asked about it and he explained to me that it was stamped with the family emblem as he came from a Hi-So family in Bangkok.
I was still living in my temporary AirBnB in one of the View Talays - as I was still scouting with the local real estate agents to see where I would eventually call home.
My date was insistent that I consider Wongamat as the place to live for me.
I explained to him - I don't want to live so far away from all of the fun in Jomtien by being located in far away northern Pattaya. I did admit that the condos and beaches of Wongamat are stunning but with the Pattaya traffic I did not want to be isolated up there as the only gay in the midst of heterosexual-landia....
He became very upset when I insisted that I wanted to live within walking distance of Supertown in the Jomtien Complex.
He told me that he could not date me because if I would enter into the Supertown that I would be considered a Lo-So (low life type of person) and with his background he cannot date this kind of person as he needed to worry abut his family and their Hi-So lifestyle.
This was quite an eye opener for me but it goes along with what you wrote above.....
In the end, that was our last date....
God forbid we live near the medieval city of Supertown and tarnish our reputation. 555555555 hahahahaha
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
bkkmfj2648
Spot on Latintopxxx,
He became very upset when I insisted that I wanted to live within walking distance of Supertown in the Jomtien Complex.
He told me that he could not date me because if I would enter into the Supertown that I would be considered a Lo-So (low life type of person) and with his background he cannot date this kind of person as he needed to worry abut his family and their Hi-So lifestyle.
bkkmfj...I have to be honest with you...I'm having a very hard time digesting what you just said.
In all my years in Thailand I have never once heard a Thai make a statement like the one quoted above. I'm not calling you a liar, but would just like to emphasize the fact that the overwhelming majority of Thais - regardless if they're gay or srt8, would consider this type of statement to be in very poor taste, insulting, and confrontational. In short "Bad Karma".
Contrary to the opinions that you and Latin seem to share, I see gays as being widely accepted in Thai society - with little or no stigma's attached. Those working in the sex-trade industry have a different set of circumstances to work around for obvious reasons. Face-saving for the family being one of them. Regardless of how open Thai society is towards gays - prostitution is frowned upon in Buddhism big-time - but viewed by many Thais as a necessary evil especially when it deals with impoverished families.
I wonder sometimes if farang don't have the impression that all the gays in Thailand are prostitutes, when in reality gays who work in this profession represent a very small percentage of the total gay community. Maybe they should drag themselves off the bar stools in BKK and PTY sometime and visit the real Thailand.
Based on everything I've seen and experienced over the years, gays, including trans, toms, bi's, ladyboys, etc. are fully integrated and accepted in Thai society.
Regardless if you're interacting with with hi-so's, low-so's, mid-so's, or even a few soso's in Thailand, I think you'll find them all to be humble and friendly. It's just the Thai "Way". The hi-so guy you mentioned in your post would definitely be the exception.
mai pen rai
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Dodger wrote:
bkkmfj...I have to be honest with you...I'm having a very hard time digesting what you just said.
In all my years in Thailand I have never once heard a Thai make a statement like the one quoted above. I'm not calling you a liar, but would just like to emphasize the fact that the overwhelming majority of Thais - regardless if they're gay or srt8, would consider this type of statement to be in very poor taste, insulting, and confrontational. In short "Bad Karma".
yes, it really happened to me as I wrote it.
The guy came across as a rich Thai snob who wanted to teach me that my decisions and motivations were incorrect.
Dodger, I agree with you that 99% of the Thai people who I have met are humble and friendly.
This guy was definitely the exception.
He came into my life as quickly as he disappeared with only his message to me to not be associated with the ilk of Supertown people.....
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
I've travelled all over Thailand with my partner and have yet to encounter anything like this. More relevant to the discussion, P.
is acutely sensitive to perceptions, aired or merely intimated about him and, by association, me. And, of course, as a native speaker he is more likely to pick-up on such things than me.
I would add, however, that the relatively small (for want of a better description) "hi-so" segment of Thai society may well have very negative views about us. Those educated in the US or the UK, for example, who may imbibed negative feelings about us, both Thais and falang visitors. And, bluntly, such people are not ones whom we encounter on our travels.
One of the things that made me feel comfortable on my first visit nearly thirty years ago was that the falang visitors (perhaps expats too- I wouldn't have been able to distinguish between them) seemed to be, in the main, well-educated and careful in their appearance and their general behaviour, Anecdotal but that is how I remember it. Similarly, I was struck by the exemplary manners of the young guys I met on thr scene, however under-privileged their background..
I was sensitive to this issue because, hitherto for decades, my annual holidays had been enjoyed in the sort of Caribbean hotels which required a jacket for dinner. Some of what I saw in non-gay areas was rather different.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dodger
why do so many expats seem so bored, bitter, and depressed?
I really hate saying this because there's certainly a lot of very friendly positive - thinking expats over here - but about half of them act like they they have a piece of barbed-wire stuck up their ass. Always complaining...never a smile...pontificating...everything's wrong...they're constantly being inconvenienced by the world around them...the music's too loud...the price of eggs went up two baht...the boy who showed up at their door had a slight mustache that wasn't visible in his picture on Grindr.,,Oh My God! Why don't they just shut up once in a while and give everybody a break.
So, I guess the question is; Will you automatically have an amazing life filled with joy and happiness when you retire in Thailand? Based on everything I've seen so far you have about a 50/50 chance.
There are a many many people who are generally unhappy by nature. Glass Half-full people. I know myself to be one of those and struggle against it.
I grew up in with critical parents who expected more from us kids than we delivered. I went into a career that valued critical people who found problems and fixed them, striving for "excellenc...." a condition that could never be reached. the result... me - highly critical, everything can be better.
But I have learned not to voice my opinion and to look to surround myself with happy people to keep me on the high side. I struggle the most when people ask for my opinion... how was your meal? how was the accommodation?
Retired at home - I'm bored, seeking projects to do. on vacation, I bury myself in sexual activities. what do I love about thailand (short list)? the people, the food, the accommodations.... a lot of other things are lacking (the weather). Colombia - the people/men, the weather.... Philippines the people...
where to retire? sigh, I need to keep looking and trying. did 3 months in colombia. want to try 3 months in thailand and 3 months in PH.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Oliver2
I would add, however, that the relatively small (for want of a better description) "hi-so" segment of Thai society may well have very negative views about us. Those educated in the US or the UK, for example, who may imbibed negative feelings about us, both Thais and falang visitors. And, bluntly, such people are not ones whom we encounter on our travels.
I'd have thought Thais educated in the west would in fact be more open to positive views - or at least actaully be more understanding. Just my view.
There's much discussion about hi-so and lo-so. Aren't the vast majority of Thais much more "mid-so"?
Back on topic. I've never heard any Thai express as bluntly the thoughts expressed in bkkmfj2648's post. Frankly though I have certainly heard similar feelings but expressed more in a less open manner. My impression is that most Thais just do not want to know about sexpat and tourist haunts. They know they exist but regard them as not for most Thais. As we are often told, Thais have their own gay haunts which expats and tourists know little or nothing about. Assume the same is true for the girlie bars.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
oh what nonsense, no society accepts the fact that anyone especially foreigners can visit their country and usd their youth like disposable paper plates...especially when the youth are male, thats a double humiliatiion...females are made to be fucked...the only thing that allows it to flourish is poverty and the fact that the Thai ruling classes have always treated their peasants badly..add to that the fact that the Thai wealth is concentrated amongst Chinese Thais...do you think they care about ethnic Thais from some paddy field province up norrth...thats why you find male gogo bars openly renting out males...and thats why most of us love it here.
The educated classes see the lower classes as little better than a pack animal, born to do the heavy dirty work.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
I understand Amando's point of view and he's correct that those educated in the west may be more open-minded....certainly towards sexual identity. But not about commercial sex, nor about any suspicion that there is an element of exploitation at work.
By the way, straying off thread for a moment, I've noticed that Thai and Asian visitor s to Thai hotels tend to be fless friendly and more authoritarian and demanding towards staff than we are. This suspicion is encouraged by those Trip Adviser reports which identify the origin of travellers' comments.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
..no matter how western educated or how long they have lived in liberal spots like LA or San Fran...the moment they land back in Thailand their attitude becomes very much local...they know the only thing standing between them and the masses is their money and their money is linked to social relationships with other wealthy clans...the lower classes are there to be used..not to be liked or looked after...lookm what happened after a politician jumped on that badwagon...got banned & jailed...lets not mention the name..so plse stop pretending its a kond accepting all embfracing society..as long as you got cash you can do what you like ...and if you got connections its even easier..
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
[QUOTE=latintopxxx;296271]
.......oh what nonsense, no society accepts the fact that anyone especially foreigners can visit their country and use their youth like disposable paper plates.../QUOTE][
You may be overlooking something: Not all foreigners use their youth like disposable paper plates. Only those who lack moral fiber.
The Thais know this all too well, and as a result treat decent jai dee foreigners who display good karma with an equal amount of respect and compassion. Conversely, those who treat them like disposable paper plates get cast aside after they're done USING THEM which is perfectly understandable.
What goes around comes around.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
dodger you need to get a grip on reality...lots of foreigners...i would say in the hundreds if not thousands every day enjoy the temporary company of local males before moving onto the next...i know i do when Im there...usually at least 2 a day...I'd say the number of foreigners residing in Thailand with stable local male companions is far outnumbered by the number of tourists who rent by the hour...and as for good karma..what nonsense..if if you are a salt of the earth type person who treats everyone around you kindly the moment the cash dries up you will be expelled from your rental home and the so called loyal love of your life will move onto greener pastured.....dont be fooled by all the face saving smiles the locals give you....and i reiterate what i know and that is the Thai upper classes regard the poor/peasants as nothing more than poorly paid labour that needs to be kept in their place...and that is why they dont care that anyone can fly in and use their youth like disposable single use paper plates
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
..and yes dodger i have travelled quite a bit and had the opportunity to visit dozens of towns and cities and nowhere is the open availability of male companions as open and commercial as in Thailand...there are hooker bars in countries where there is lots of free lancer talent available but its not as blatant or as open...
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
A fascinating discussion, hope it continues and does not get so heated that it degrades into a battle of personal insults.
In comparison, a similar poverty based class structure exist in Philippines, Laos, cambodia, Colombia, (and Brazil, dominican republic....& others) without the open gay prostitution business structure. is this a legacy of american Korea/vietnam era R&R bases? I have not seen this open (although illegal) gay prostitution system as thailand elsewhere....
In PH subic bay and Angeles City have the remains of their (hetero) prostitution businesses, but not a gay one. Colombian has a legal very active visible hetero prostitution system,..... the gay one is there but submerged, not visible.
the other countries I have no experience in. (well I was in the DR long ago).
https://co.mileroticos.com/escorts-g...quia/medellin/
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
maump
In comparison, a similar poverty based class structure exist in Philippines, Laos, cambodia, Colombia, (and Brazil, dominican republic....& others) without the open gay prostitution business structure. is this a legacy of american Korea/vietnam era R&R bases?
Pretty much, plus simply tourism and religion as well. Places like Laos and Cambodia are landlocked, hence lower tourism overall, whereas Thailand has beautiful beaches and islands all over.
Philippines has a thriving sex worker scene, but is also a Catholic country hence government and society at large are less accepting of sex workers. Whereas Thailand is Buddhist hence overall more tolerant of, well.. everything, because that's just part of being Buddhist.
Then like you said, Pattaya was the R&R place for US soldiers during Vietnam. Thailand simply got addicted to all that foreign money and both, government and society at large were all too happy to alter their views and acceptance of sex workers / tourism in exchange for keeping that cash flowing, houses bing built, etc.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dodger
I
- And, as my old friend Carolina Jim would say, “Never fall in love with a whore”.
Mai pen rai
I flunked that but he was worth it
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3 Attachment(s)
Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Thailand drops off top 10
Attachment 13406
Attachment 13407
But still one of the cheapest...
Attachment 13408
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
dab69
I flunked that but he was worth it
Ditto...555
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
latintopxxx
.......dodger you need to get a grip on reality.
No thank you. Accepting it is challenge enough.
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Re: Life in Thailand - Test Results
Quote:
Originally Posted by
latintopxxx
....... if you are a salt of the earth type person who treats everyone around you kindly the moment the cash dries up you will be expelled from your rental home and the so called loyal love of your life will move onto greener pastures.
No argument there. See it all the time.
I've watched some pretty generous and jai dee farang get dragged threw the mud by their "Thai Love"...drained of every dollar they had in their account...and then left discarded (like you previously suggested) like a used paper plate. I've also watched some pretty nasty farang treating the working boys like nothing more than discardable sex objects too. I guess that door swings both ways.
Thais aren't perfect people by a long stretch and when you're submersed in the active sex scene interacting with nothing but working boys the odds of connecting with someone disingenuous are pretty high. I think I heard someone once refer to this as "reality".
I've always believed that answers to these complex dilemmas in life are always somewhere in the "Center". On one side you have farang punters who throw their pocketbooks at the working boys...shower them with expensive gifts...never say no to a request for more money...and take the bait hook-line-and sinker. The term "Walking ATM" was invented for guys like this. Then, on the other end of the spectrum, you have punters who continually abuse the working boys...emotionally, and sometimes physically as well.
I've always felt it best to just treat them the same way I want to be treated...try to use some common sense when it comes to judging their character...draw my line-in-the-sand when it comes to charitable contributions...and take it from there. The middle road. Not an easy touch - and not Darth Vader either.