How dire is the situation on the ground in Pattaya among Thai boys/men?

Hi All, Well I guess this is another of those "am I getting ripped off?" threads. Can those of you kind expats who are in Pattaya now please shed some light on the current situation there for out-of-work Thai boys/men? Being away from Thailand during this crisis makes it hard to evaluate reality there.

So here goes, I am receiving increasing desperate sounding messages from two of my "regulars" there. Both are kind people who I have known for years, who have never deceived me (to the best of my knowledge) and are not the type to make financial demands.

The last message I received (yesterday) was "I am nearly dead" which I presume is a rather dramatic overstatement. Nonetheless it is concerning and troubling. He is from Udon Thani and says he would like to return home to his family but that there is no transport(yet)that is possible. Is that true? There are no Isaan buses running yet?

I know the food lines are long there (YouTube videos are revealing). Are people getting sufficiently fed? If a guy there is out of work are they usually finding friends there who will provide shelter?

I certainly would never turn down a valid request from anyone in desperate need of help, much less a Thai friend, but neither do I want to feel like he is unable to fend for himself during this crisis in a reasonable way.

Your thoughts?
Thanks! Mahalo! Kawp koon krub!

Firstly, boys on the game come from poverty and currently the country’s economy is suffering so the poor like always do most of the suffering. If a boy asks for money to eat no matter true or false I will give it, I won’t pay rent as in my opinion they should be back with their families at this time. No matter what you decide to give once you do be prepared for requests for money to continue. If a boy wants money to leave Pattaya to return home the provinces are now open for travel bus fares seldom exceed 500 baht.....If a boy is with his family and asks for money to return to Pattaya as someone living in Pattaya I can say there is nothing to return to.

Good question Marc K.

I too have a few guys asking for money. I know for sure that one is taking the piss and ignore his frequent requests although I do send him a small amount once a month.

Another one pleaded for some money to eat so I sent him 2500 baht. He then asked for 3000 baht to return to Laos. He was supposed to go in two days time and I sent him the 3000. A few days later I talked to him on line and he admitted he was still in Pattaya. Some excuse about not being able to travel...he should have known that. No more for him.

A third one is so polite and honest I would almost believe anything he tells me (risky I know!). He has never, ever, asked for money in the seven years I’ve known him. So he gets money every month...

I think you have to take each case on it’s merits but maybe one way to stop constant requests is to send the deserving cases money once a month and make that clear that’s all they get.

I would suggest that if you can send money and not inflict financial harm on yourself, then do so. And as suggested make it a fixed amount as mentioned above. Travel within Thailand is open and available. Whether one can travel to other countries such as Laos, I don't know for sure.

If you can afford to send money you should do so.

There are undoubtedly occasions when someone takes advantage of us but some falangs could be accused of taking advantage of Thais by paying minimal amounts for services that would cost much more at home.

I've been treated well by the guys I've met in Thailand; and I hope they think that I've treated them equally well.

"Firstly, boys on the game come from poverty" MFAS

"some falangs could be accused of taking advantage of Thais by paying minimal amounts for services" Oliver

The two are related. I always find any farang boasting about how little he managed to pay a boy utterly repulsive.

From the group of guys I'm still in contact with, I would say that they (the Thai guys) do reasonably well. They seem to have enough financial reserves and most of them found a small sidejob (paint job, back to the farm, tattoo work, starting a food stall, ..). Their main problem is being bored, closely followed by relationship problems with their partner. I don't want to generalize, it is certainly possible that your Thai friend is in trouble and could use all the financial support he can get.

The money requests I receive are from guys from Myanmar, Laos or Cambodia, no matter if they are still in Pattaya or in their home country. Those 'migrant workers' seem to be hit far worse than the Thai.

michaelx, not quite sure what the purpose of your post ....Simply if you want to send money send it or don’t!

I've too have had several requests, I send nothing, none of them seem to have died just yet - and before I hear "ohhh you're going to risk that?" after many years I dont think I've EVER heard of any Thai guy I know dying from actual starvation - maybe not having enough for whisky with his friends later or running out of cigaretttes etc perhaps or not being able to afford the new phone that he 'needs" so badly - but actual dropping from hunger, no not so much. At the rate our economy is going here I'm actually thinking of copying a pasting a of their messages back to them and asking THEM for some support more like.

Mind you it's funny how this last few weeks when messages from VERY old Thai contacts resurfaced asking for some money once I explained that I'd a live in Asian BF who "takes up all my money" ( not quite true lol) funnily their messages seem to stop and they ( I assume) move on to their next mark.

One Thai “friend “ I’ve known for years still copies me into his ( every forth day) begging message, he KNOWS I don’t / won’t send him money now as I know his MO and I’ve told him to stop sending me “those” messages several times now, whereon he apologises and admits they all go out in bulk as he’s got all of his various farang “friends” on a group “help me” list as it’s just easier to send in bulk and he can never be bothered deleting my name from that Particular list, needless to say he gets zero from me - but still keeps sending, I guess I’m case he catches me in a weak moment. I should add too that he lives in back of beyond near Kalasin so I’m guessing his needs in comparison to his requests are actually minimal and he’s probably doing quite well from his various farang benefactors each week, who I know for a fact aren’t aware of the others.

I know a few boys who I had repeatedly good time with without problems or drama. They wouldn't ask me for money, so I asked them how the situation is and asked for their bank account to send them money. That was mid-April. I think I will have a second round soon.

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Originally Posted by Marc K

The last message I received (yesterday) was "I am nearly dead" which I presume is a rather dramatic overstatement. Nonetheless it is concerning and troubling. He is from Udon Thani and says he would like to return home to his family but that there is no transport(yet)that is possible. Is that true? There are no Isaan buses running yet?

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I also have a Udon Thani friend that claimed he was going to kill himself (in messages to my BF) over the last few days as the bars were still closed, he wanted to go home and he couldn't survive another month of closures. I think this suicidal tendency was caused more by boredom than anything else.

Others have posted that the interprovincial buses are running, but I am not sure that is the case. You have to have a valid reason to move between provinces and "no money or farang in pattaya" is not a valid reason. It needs to be death of a relative or imminent death or similar necessary journeys.

e.g. My BFs sister has been unable to go back to Buriram to see her 7 month old Son for the last 3 months and is beside herself with worry, similarly neither BF nor any of his family were able to travel to Buriram to attend a favourite uncles recent funeral

The situation for the, mostly Shan, migrants in Chiang Mai is dire. Without jobs, and thus income, there is rent to be found and money needed for food. When there are food handouts, Thais get bottles of oil, rice and so on whereas migrants get a noodle pot and three bottles of water. My Shan partner tells me that they are unable to return home where they might have some sort of suport system but, in reality, they are generally the support system for those back 'home'. I guess this is pretty much the same elsewhere and for Cambodian and Lao guys. It would be a great kindness to help some of these people out, where appropriate.

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Originally Posted by Nirish guy

Nirish _to have died just yet - and before I hear "ohhh you're going to risk that?" after many years I dont think I've EVER heard of any Thai guy I know dying from actual starvation - maybe not having enough for whisky with his friends later or running out of cigaretttes etc perhaps or not being able to afford the new phone that he '

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This is a fair comment.

In Pattaya there are about 10,000 people (Thais) registered and eligible for a token financial help from the authorities, however the number of needy foreigners (including unemployed bar workers) are unaccounted for. These are the people who are desperate to stretch whatever cash they have and whatever items on them that can be redeemed for cash. That is why one keeps on seeing long lines of people queuing for free food and meagre charitable handouts like 5kg bags of rice and a tray of eggs. There's so much uncertainty in their present circumstances.

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Originally Posted by colmx

Others have posted that the interprovincial buses are running, but I am not sure that is the case. You have to have a valid reason to move between provinces and "no money or farang in pattaya" is not a valid reason. It needs to be death of a relative or imminent death or similar necessary journeys.

e.g. My BFs sister has been unable to go back to Buriram to see her 7 month old Son for the last 3 months and is beside herself with worry, similarly neither BF nor any of his family were able to travel to Buriram to attend a favourite uncles recent funeral

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All travel restrictions within the Kingdom have been lifted.

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Originally Posted by Manforallseasons

All travel restrictions within the Kingdom have been lifted.

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Not really.

There's still a mandatory 14 day quarantine (or isolation) restriction in place for those who are traveling from one province to another.

I've been in Buriram for 3 months now waiting for this restriction to be lifted so I can return to my primary residence in Bang Saray for this very reason.

Yes, the girl who colmx is referring to could travel to Buriram to visit her child, although would be forced to isolate inside her residence for 14 days.

According to a recent article in the Bangkok Post, there are approximately 200,000 unemployed prostitutes upset right now because they don't qualify for the 5,000 baht government handout, nor will the government even acknowledge their existence.

The majority of working boys I've known over the years always sent a portion of their earnings home to Mom, and I'm sure that they would have room and board covered if they simply returned home until this nightmare is over.

There is a lot more eye candy up here in Isaan right now because of this. None of them appear to be starving.

Travel from Petchaburi, Pattaya and elsewhere to and from Bangkok is unimpeded.
Dodger I took this photo yesterday morning at Bang Saray:

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Originally Posted by Manforallseasons

Travel from Petchaburi, Pattaya and elsewhere to and from Bangkok is unimpeded.
Dodger I took this photo yesterday morning at Bang Saray:

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That's the lowest low tide I've ever seen - but it still makes me homesick.

A friend who worked in a hotel in Pattaya has been to Bangkok and Surin and back to Pattaya and is going to Surin again soon for a funeral of a relative.

Coming from Pattaya or Bangkok, you go through Buriram province before reaching Surin. Is there police who check people who want to get off bus or train in Buriram? Most buses have two doors, but for trains, each carriage has four doors and you would need someone at each door to control passengers leaving train.

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Originally Posted by francois

Whether one can travel to other countries such as Laos, I don't know for sure.

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Laos border is still closed to non-citizens. At least I don't believe Thais can enter Laos, as it may be different due to ASEAN, but don't think so as Laos took a pretty hard stance regarding Kovid-19. For example, if you're a Laos citizen working in Vientiance, you haven't been able to go back to your village and see your parents / family for months now. Villages are still all barricaded off, nobody allowed in, not even family members.

From the last video call I got the barbers are not open.

That's all I can say for certainty. Friend was messaging about "wanting to eat MK". (KFC)
I had just picked up Subway foot long/$5 and sent him a picture. He sent back a crying emoji.
Just a friend of a friend but I sent him $50.

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Originally Posted by dab69

He sent a crying emoji. Just a friend of a friend but I sent him $50.

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FAO Dab69 ������. ������. ������. ������. There you go, four emojis, by your maths I think that’s 200 bucks you owe me. Man if I knew it was that easy to get money out of farang I think I’d be sending crying emojis to every farang I knew, even if just friend of a friend night and day ! :-)

Edit - hmm maybe this sending farangs crying emojis IS harder than it looks as it seems the four emojis that are showing perfectly on my screen now appear on my post as question marks !!! Oh well Dab69 I suggest you just trust me and send me the money anyway eh ? :-)

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Originally Posted by dab69

From the last video call I got the barbers are not open.

That's all I can say for certainty. Friend was messaging about "wanting to eat MK". (KFC)
I had just picked up Subway foot long/$5 and sent him a picture. He sent back a crying emoji.
Just a friend of a friend but I sent him $50.

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Barber shops are open had a haircut last Friday.

I'm always amazed that MB seem to be short on cash...most seem to have absolutely no savings, even an average MB could be earning say 1000bht/day and could squeeze a lifetime into 15 years of whoring if he started at 18 and due to good asian genetics stayed slim and fit and youngish looking, Ive seen 35 year olds that I thought were at least 10 years younger...are they all so stupid that its easy come easy go...

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Originally Posted by latintopxxx

I'm always amazed that MB seem to be short on cash...most seem to have absolutely no savings, even an average MB could be earning say 1000bht/day and could squeeze a lifetime into 15 years of whoring if he started at 18 and due to good asian genetics stayed slim and fit and youngish looking, Ive seen 35 year olds that I thought were at least 10 years younger...are they all so stupid that its easy come easy go...

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Excatly this is the main problem most of MB don't save money at all some of them help their family and spent all their remain earnings on alcohol, drugs,bets,girls and other stupid things .I once sent substantial amount of money to a boy who returned to his mum I hoped he stelled there and find proper job and won't return to sell his body in Phuket where I met him but instead he didn't have any intention to work at all his intention was to do nothing build a small house in the property of his family and hope I will send him money every month to fund this 'enchanted adventure' , I learnt my lesson and never ever sent money again to any boy. I received desperate messeges from desperate boys due the Convi virus but decided to ignore them because I know if I send money once endless requests will follow for more. If this boys saved money for gloomy days as I do their situation wasn't so desperate this days so why do I have to help them ?

As it has been from the beginning of time, boys in this profession will always survive with or without your additional help. Don't worry yourself too much.

Yes. Hard to believe your average money boy of little education and from extreme poverty doesn't have superb financial planning skills. Go figure. BtW. Anyone found it difficult during lockdown? Just asking like.

And please. We are gay men of refinement, not autoworkers from Pittsburgh. Can we stop calling it a barbers and use a more appropriate name such as a salon, stylist or hairdresser.

You can find the same lack of empathy in far- right websites complaining about Afro-Americans. Why can't everyone else be just like us?

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Originally Posted by arsenal

Yes. Hard to believe your average money boy of little education and from extreme poverty doesn't have superb financial planning skills. Go figure. BtW. Anyone found it difficult during lockdown? Just asking like.

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Yes, it is difficult during the lockdown; very boring for many of us expats. I agree, what you said about the money boys and others who live on a pittance and unable to save due to lack of financial skills.

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Originally Posted by arsenal

And please. We are gay men of refinement, not autoworkers from Pittsburgh. Can we stop calling it a barbers and use a more appropriate name such as a salon, stylist or hairdresser.

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Arsenal, the shops I frequent do use the name Barber. The ladies go to salons and sytlists and hairdressers, oh and some vain men.

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Originally Posted by Oliver2

You can find the same lack of empathy in far- right websites complaining about Afro-Americans. Why can't everyone else be just like us?

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Oliver, the lack of empathy for those less fortunate is appalling.

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Originally Posted by christianpfc

A friend who worked in a hotel in Pattaya has been to Bangkok and Surin and back to Pattaya and is going to Surin again soon for a funeral of a relative.

Coming from Pattaya or Bangkok, you go through Buriram province before reaching Surin. Is there police who check people who want to get off bus or train in Buriram? Most buses have two doors, but for trains, each carriage has four doors and you would need someone at each door to control passengers leaving train.

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I can only tell you what I've heard - but have not seen this with my own eyes:

According to an announcement that was published back in March, travelers entering Buriram via car, bus, rail or air, will be flagged upon arrival and either placed in a 14 day quarantine (if they are arriving from abroad) or a 14 day isolation for inter-province travelers. As far as the efficiency of these checks at the bus or rail stations, I really have no idea. I do know that they stop all cars entering the province. My partner Jai has family members residing in both Surin and neighboring Ubon Ratchathani who have not visited their homes here in Buriram since this mandate was announced.

My guess is that some travelers make it in - and some don't. Right now a farang and his Thai wife who live near Jai's home were placed on 14 day isolation for making a one day shopping trip to Ubon and then reentering Buriram by car.

All said, I would imagine this interprovincial travel restriction will be lifted (or modified) soon. Fingers crossed.

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Originally Posted by francois

Yes, it is difficult during the lockdown; very boring for many of us expats. I agree, what you said about the money boys and others who live on a pittance and unable to save due to lack of financial skills.

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Add to that the fact that they are young guys who are in perpetual party mode.

Weren't we like that at their age? I certainly was -and still am to some extent! - so I would be the last to criticize them.

I just hope they come to their senses early enough in their "career" and learn to put aside some money for the future.

Both my regulars in Thailand have done just that. My Bangkok guy in particular has well and truly set himself up for the future by buying up farmland and cattle in his home town.

As for all those other guys I've had fun times with over many years, I can only hope they are all well and safe and are somehow managing to get by. I'm reassured by the fact that they are quite willing to help each other out when times are tough. They are very quick to look after each other and I see that as one of their many admirable qualities.

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Originally Posted by Oliver2

You can find the same lack of empathy in far- right websites complaining about Afro-Americans. Why can't everyone else be just like us?

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It's a bit much to conflate people members here ( myself included) consciously choosing not to send money to random boys / prostitutes that they hardly know, especially when we know that that same boys / prostitutes main accepted job IS to extract just as much money out of us all as they possibly can, by all and any means necessary, either in the short term or if they're very good in the longer term too and putting that choice down to being akin to far right white supremacists / racists - dont you think ?

As Dinagam has already pointed out above the boys and their chosen job profession has been going on since time immemorial and our deciding not to donate further than our agreed "fee" to the ever continuing build of their mother, fathers or their own new house up country somewhere does not necessarily make us "better or worse people" than those who do - maybe just perhaps a little less gullible that those who do perhaps WITHOUT realising THAT is what they ( and many others ) have actually been doing.

And as for the boys lack of education and poor financial planning skills, well, just try short changing him and see how little time it takes before that situation is brought to your attention. Likewise on rent day ( which seems to come around about 10 times every month for some boys apparently) again "somehow" they always seem to manage - so perhaps they're not quite as unskilled in forward planning as some of us might like to think.

We are NOT their saviours or rescuers, the Thai population will manage quite well whether we're there or not, differently perhaps and not with the latest iPhone for sure maybe, but we ( and all the other groups that have visited Thailand) just come and go and we / they are simply "there for the taking" during our travels there ( and now even when returning home it seems too thanks to chat Apps !) - and all until the next group arrives ( Russians, Chinese etc etc) - which I dont criticise the Thais' for in ANY way by the way, good luck to them, if they can find people (stupid) enough to carry on giving them money for years for no more reason than the maybe fucked their son or daughter once or twice when they were working out trying to reel in a "rich stupid faring" whilst out at work being a prosititute then I take my hat off to them, again, not as stupid as some here would seem to think it seems !

The Thai population have managed just fine long before we came and will do long after we've all left, of that I'm sure. I'm guessing ALL of us, if we see a genuine case of real need, real hunger etc would step up in a heart beat but to suggest that people choosing not to send money to every / any boy / prostitute who decides to add us to their Whatsapp "sucker" list makes us somehow akin to a far right racist is simply ridiculous in my view ( and not to say offensive too of course).

So, if it makes you feel good about yourself then certainly you should carry on sending to each and every boy who decides to send you a request, but I wont be and I dont feel guilty about that in any way and I'm certainly not a far right supremacist either the last time I checked.

"the Thai population will manage quite well whether we're there or not,"

How dare you. You take that back. The Thai population, or at least a certain demographic of it will most absolutely definitely positively not manage quite well or otherwise without myself being there to ensure said demographic is managing well either quite or otherwise and myself in order to ensure said managing is up to the standards of myself will absolutely definitely positively be getting there as soon as possible entirely to assist in the managing of the aforementioned demographic. I hope that's clear. Manage without us indeed, whoever heard the like?

Let me repeat......before we / you arrived and long after you / we're gone ........ they'll be JUST fine I wouldn't fret :-)

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Originally Posted by Nirish guy

It's a bit much to conflate people members here ( myself included) consciously choosing not to send money to random boys / prostitutes that they hardly know,

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ad infinitum.

NIrish guy, that is the most woeful post you have made to date!

If by "we" you mean tourists then the 10s of thousands of Thais who derived their income entirely from the tourist industry aren't "just fine" are they because their income has dried up. And those same people lived/worked under the radar so are not entitled to any govt help. And those were the people that we went there for. So if they were "just fine" in the past and will be in the future they're most definitely not right now.

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Originally Posted by francois

ad infinitum.

NIrish guy, that is the most woeful post you have made to date!

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We must be getting different levels of professional begging messages then is all I can assume, as I said if it makes you happy then please, feel free to go right ahead and send what you wish to who you wish, it's a free world - and that of course works both ways.

It is a bit galling receiving plea's for money when messages are sent from top of the range phones costing in the region of 30 to 45,000 bht

I'm a little puzzled...how do these guys gain access to customers' phone numbers and emails? Wouldn't hornet and Romeo be a better bet for contacts in Thailand?