Re: Sleeping in the villages...
Well, yeah. If I'm growing old with Leo, then I have to accept that his village, his childhood home where his parents live, will become an integral part of my life. I'd be a pretty shitty husband if I tried to ignore that fact, don't you think?
I'm sure the family will accept me just fine, so not worried about it. Decent chance myself and the gather won't have anything in common, so we'll just respectfully ignore each other, and I expect that as well. But we're going to be spending a good amount of time in that village, and that's especially true if we take his nephews in. They're going to need to go home and spend time with their mother and freinds quite often.
Again, I'm not thinking in terms of just a one-off trip and a meet & greet. I'm thinking of terms of a second home, so yeah, I'll make myself comfortable. I'm not building a house out there, but I'll put in say $2000 USD into building myself a comfortable little campsite.
And Leo agrees with me, so that's what we're doing, I'm sure. :)
PS. Factor in the fact that I'm now blind. I need a comfortable environment where I feel safe now. It's not like I can be left up to my own devices, and go wandering, and find my own way around. Get me setup with my little environment (camp site) where I know where everything is, and Leo can take off and do his own thing without having to worry about me.
Re: Sleeping in the Villages II
Quote:
Originally Posted by
cdnmatt
You guys just think it's a crazy idea, because I'm the one who came up with it. If Smiles, Dodger, or bob posted about it you'd probably all say, "oh yeah, that is actually a good idea". I'm Canadian so have been camping tons in my life, and will ensure I'm setup comfortably.
Bob says: I assure everyone that my last camping experience, never to be repeated, was in 1960. I don’t know how eager Smiles or Dodger might be to get very close to nature right now.
Before the Matt/Leo photo, I did not hesitate to post comments or criticisms about the rationale of someone we assumed to be a fictional character. Now that we see he actually exists, I find I am even more concerned about Matt’s plans for his life in Laos, since he intends to care for three citizens of the country. I still feel that he would have benefited from regular face-to-face interaction with other native speakers of English, rather than leading his life on a very self-assured, but possibly flawed path in this SE Asia experience.
But I now realize I must accept the fact that Matt and I are on two very different, never-to-be-reconciled pages in this book of Life. So, no more comments from me about the KK and Lao Tales. Just a wish that things will work out as well as Matt assures us they will.
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Sleeping in village: I've made numerous trips to the villages in Issan and the north of Thailand. The boys and their families always assumed I would be staying in a hotel/resort rather than in their homes. Of course, if the BF insists, I suppose you would have to give serious thought to sleeping en famille. Good luck.
Re: Sleeping in the villages...
Having posted a photo Matt has made himself real. Therefore members, especially the older senior and supposedly wiser ones should think twice before posting comments they would have done before. And Matt, you should stop attracting so much rancour now.
Re: Sleeping in the villages...
Bob, can I ask you something then? Maybe it'll help me get a better insight into what my family is thinking.
What am I supposed to do? Leave my husband who's saved my life, make my dogs homeless giving them a death sentence, then jet off to somewhere like Silicon Valley, grab a job at Google or Apple, and work my way up the corporate ladder? Do you have any idea of how dismal and depressing of a life that would be for me?
Or should I get rid of everything as mentioned above, move to say Vancouver, Canada, get a job with some IT start up, hang out in my condo lonely and depressed always, just so I can see my family 2 or 3 times each year during the holidays?
No offense or disrespect Joe, and no judgements here. However, notice how Joe is somewhat lonely and depressed in life right now? It's pretty obvious if you watch his posts. That would be me if I went back out West, and probably far moreso, considering I'm blind right now.
Instead, I'm happy, comfortable, mentally and emotionally strong, ambition, and can't wait to see what the future provides.
Also, please realize, when it comes to personal relationships, I only care what's inside their heart. Granted, Leo isn't going to become an aeronautical engineer anytime soon, and got that. However, he does happen to be one of the most down to earth, realistic, loving, compassionate, and empathetic individuals you'll ever meet. I've been through this life and world enough to know finding someone of his moral character and quality is next to impossible. Oh, we speak 90% English together, and he's near fluent. I guess I have to get him to spell out words sometimes due to his accent, but he knows English extremely well.
As for the kids, that wasn't my decision, and not like I went looking for them. Leo's the one who came into my room one day, and asked if I wanted a couple "servants". He wanted to help them, plus thought it'd be good to have them around due to me being blind, as they can run to the store for me, etc. I had to explain to him that there's no way either of us has the heart to treat a couple kids like servants, so if we take them, we're going to end up loving them, and they're going to become our adopted children. Don't worry about the language barrier, as they've been watching Thai TV programs since they were born and speak Thai like Laos folks, and it will be about all of 3 months before they know enough English for them to communicate in English.
So I'm asking, what's so crazy about this? Again, in your mind, what should I do? I don't have a home to go back to in Canada, as since 2005 I've only lived there for one year in 2008/9. So what do I do? I'm honestly curious, because my family has the same thoughts as you. They just can't understand why I'm not back in Canada, to the point they think I'm mentally ill. I'd love to understand better, because I have yet to hear any logical and rational arguments against my decision to stay.
Re: Sleeping in the villages...
Matt, it's entirely, absolutely up to you. You can only do what you think you should do. Only follow the path that you choose. Now that I see you are real, I do not recommend anything. It's your life, not mine.
Re: Sleeping in the villages...
Quote:
And Matt, you should stop attracting so much rancour now.
For myself no rancour at all. Just tedium now: photos or not this Matt dude has entered a maudlin Drama Queen territory and will be happy to know I'm exiting stage left. There ain't no more here, there must be better.
Re: Sleeping in the villages...
See, as always no answer, same as what I get from my family. They're dismayed that I stayed, but can' come up with a logical reason as to why. They're simply under the assumption that if I throw everything away that's good in my life, and head back to some unknown city in Canada, then everything will be great. I'm sorry, but that's simply not reality.
Re: Sleeping in the villages...
Matt for the $2000 you are proposing to spend on camping gear... You could probably build an actual home in the village... As long as Leo has the land and it doesn't need filling or piling
It wouldn't be the Ritz, but it would have 4 block walls and a roof!
Re: Sleeping in the villages...
Matt, I don't mind you mentioning my depression. It's my reality.
Look. (if that's not an inappropiate thing to say to a blind person). If your decision is to move to Laos with Leo, then go ahead, and be happy. It's not a choice I would have made. But "up to you". I genuinely wish you both the best for your future together.
Looking forward to seeing you on 15 January.
Re: Sleeping in the villages...
Quote:
Originally Posted by
cdnmatt
See, as always no answer, same as what I get from my family. They're dismayed that I stayed, but can' come up with a logical reason as to why.
OK. Answer: If you could not get relief for your vision situation in Canada, then there would be NO reason for you to return there, in my opinion. Stay where you are, stay with Leo. You need someone like him.