Farang Fashion Tips 2006

[Surfcrest]

Last year I made a few comments about some serious "don'ts" that I saw with Farangs and their fashion sense.

Here are some for this year;

There are many good looking Farangs out there that could look even better with very little effort.
Remember (except if you are Boygeorge / Mr. Sydney) that we are fags with born intuition about fashion sense and style.
Of course many of us have not explored that inner part of our "self" yet, but trust me its there.
Perhaps a little deeper under the surface for some than othersтАж..

I still see some fanny pack mistakes happening out there at night.
If you are climbing temples, riding elephants or slicing your way through northern jungles a fanny pack is fine. Just don't tuck your shirt in under it and never wear one when you are going out at night.

Some people still wear draw string shorts, possibly because the 80's brought fond memories for them.
The benefit to draw string shorts is that it allows you to adjust your girth to the amount of food and beer you put down your throat. Unfortunately, they are not designed to carry big cargo such as wallets and / or keys without you having to continually pull up or re-tie thems. Thus, the draw string short makes you sit more and subsequently miss out on more of life's wonders. If you still have a pair or two, they are still in good shape and you are not ready to part with them just yet, make sure you do not tuck your shirt under the waist. That is just wrong. Have a look in the mirror if you feel compelled to do such a thing and your reflection will tell you the same thing.

Unfortunately, many mirrors don't show you what is going on farther down. I am convinced that there is a world wide conspiracy to take over the world by a secret sect and they wear socks and sandals together to know one another by sight. Any sock in an open toe shoe is going to get dirty unless you aren't leaving the Taj Mahal today. Are your toes that cold today or are you afraid to have them seen in public? A pedicure is a wonderful thing. Sexy feet are an exciting turn on for many guys and at 250 - 300 baht for a good pedicure / manicure, how could you say "no" to having sexy feet. Besides, having that old toe jam removed will make your feet and shoes smell better for the next time you are at Wat Whatever and you find yourself not staring at a toe nail cutting through those precious Wal-Mart socks of yours. Shorts and dark socks are wrong. Knee socks are wrong unless you are a scout master. Dark shoes and shorts are wrong. Try finding a comfortable pair of loafers instead and maybe try them on before you buy them while you are in a pair of shorts. Sandals always work with shorts, but they arenтАЩt always comfortable when you are walking any great distances. DonтАЩt come to Thailand thinking youтАЩll find a nice pair of shoes here. There arenтАЩt any. Cargo magazine and GQ can provide some great ideas on shoes to pick up before you come.

I haven't quite figured out whether Hawaiian shirts are making yet another come back or if this isnтАЩt another secret sect. It seems the biggest mistake I am seeing this year is with larger people making the wrong shirt selection. If you enjoy a full figure, but donтАЩt want to accentuate it any more, stay away from horizontal lines. They just make you look bigger. In the hot sun it may not be the right choice, but at night you will find darker solid colours will not make you look so big. Try putting a single simple necklace on to attract more attention away from your tummy. Bling is fine if you are Snoop Doggy Dog, but too much stuff will only make you look like a cheap pimp so keep it on the simple side. If you are wearing a bag with shoulder straps, let it hang from the same shoulder / side that you are wearing it on. DonтАЩt let is cross over your chest or it will accentuate your man boobs (even if you think you donтАЩt have any / it will make you appear as though you do / and thatтАЩs no good even if you do drag).

If you can do it, a nice form fitting shirt is worth much more than 20 cheap Wal-Mart shirts. There is a big difference between form fitting and fitting your big form into a shirt. If you are at a clothing store, a trusting salesman (many of whom are gay with great fashion sense) should be able to give you a good opinion of how well you look or donтАЩt look. If its only you and the mirror, watch out for stretching around the chest, under the arms, the back and at the tummy. Cotton breathes better, if you sweat and most good shirts will tell you the fabric content. You donтАЩt want a sweat patch to spoil your nice form fitting look, even here in the tropics. A cheap water mist bottle (usually around 5 baht) is a good idea to get rid of wrinkles before you head out the door. Spray a light mist (water / ONLY / added scents will cause staining after it dries fully) on any wrinkles when you put on your shirt and by the time you leave any of the wrinkles should be gone. The weight of the water will pull any wrinkles out without changing the look of the shirt and the water stain will dry quickly.

DonтАЩt over match colours. Remember you are a fag and itтАЩs in you to be good at colour selection. You wouldnтАЩt paint the trim on the house the same colour as the paint so donтАЩt do make the same mistake while you are getting dressed. Remember the rules, тАЬtogether blue and green should not be seen except when in the washing machineтАЭ and тАЬno white pants in the rainy seasonтАЭ (Labour Day for many back home). If you wear a shirt and tie back home, you probably know how to co-ordinate colours effectively. If you are looking for a shirt to go with that pair of jeans / slacks that you love, wear it when you shop to match it up properly.

Remember, the standing rule going now is тАЬless is moreтАЭ.
You don't need to spend a lot to look good and you don't need to wear a big brand name on the front.

Keep Smiling!

Surfcrest

Thats all cool, but WHO are we dressing for exactly?
I was under the impression that socks with sandals was a Euro thing, correct?

[Aunty]

Well thank you Joan Rivers. Now perhaps you could also gives us the benefit of your sharp eye into frocks and accessories for visiting farang 2006? A little Lacroix maybe, some Prada, Chanel??? I mean just what is a man to pack?

(I draw the line at Mr Sydney's crimpelene safari suits.)

Last year I made a few comments about some serious "don'ts" that I saw with Farangs and their fashion sense.

Here are some for this year;

Surfcrest, I am sure you consider yourself the high priestess of fashion and the epitome of all things gourmet related, but have you stopped to consider that some of us may just be happy to enjoy all that Thailand has to offer and we do not wish to either compare the Thai way of doing things with what we may get back home nor really care what your opinions are on dress or food. Your suggestions for fashion would suggest that you are an elderly farang attempting to regain his youth by the use of what you consider to be current fashion trends although most of your suggestions are humorous and others quite laughable.

You appear intent in your posting about Balcony to be as detrimental as possible and when you start complaining that some of the boys in clubs that you have visited are 'lacking in English' have you stopped to consider and ask yourself how many boys working in clubs in your own country are able to greet/converse with Thais in the Thai language or would that be to contradict your self-assumed superiority over others?

Just relax and enjoy your stay in Thailand rather than appear to be on a mission to demean as much as possible. So far the postings of your trip would seem to indicate that you have spent all your time being as miserable as possible, so maybe it is your own attitude to others that brings you the response and service that you deserve.

I have to agree with Surfcrest on most of his points - having formerly lived in Florida, I can assure you that bad fashion sense is not exclusive to the farangs.

May I add a plug for undershirts? I know that when it is miserably hot out, the last thing you want to think about is adding another layer of clothing, but in my experience a good cotton t-shirt has many benefits

1) It adds a layer between the places you sweat most and your outer shirt- resulting in fewer sweat stains - plus cotton wicks the moisture away from your skin

2) If you wear a colored T, then you can wear another shirt, untucked and unbuttoned on top, which will allow air to circulate, and for the more Reubenesque amongst us, is actully a slimming look

3) A slightly (note *slightly*) snug T can have a minor girdling effect - and should help satisfy catholic school children who have had "tuck in your shirt, young man" drilled into their brains by Sister Mary Domnatrix. If you are wearing your outer shirt opn, then your T must be untucked as well - sorry - rules of layering.

On shoes...

I have always had very wide feet and a high arch, and have come to learn the value of a well-made, good-fitting pair of shoes. If you are buying some for a vacation in which you expect to do a lot of walking - definitely break them in first! I would love for my shoes to always look brand new - but a scuff or two are simply the price you need to pay to make sure you don't get into foot trouble on your holiday.

I bought a pair of New Balance (made in the USA) athletic shoes last year in anticipation of a trip to Italy. There were a perfect fit, and comfortable as any shoe I've ever taken out of a box. I was ready to go ahead and put them in my suitcase taht minute - but I thought it'd be wise to give them a test run. By the end of the first day of wear, I had lost all feeling in the big toe of my right foot, followed by paresthesia and then pain upon removing them. Those shoes could have ruined several days of my vacation before I got off the plane.

For those who have responded negatively to Surfcrest's original post, just take a moment and think - when was the last time you saw a guy in dark socks and sandals, loud hawaiin shirt, clip-on sunglasses and pith helmet and thought "hmmm - looking good!"?

[dab69]

yes guilty as charged here. i flLaunTed my black leather dress shoes/socks at the beach with shorts, but I felt SOOOOOoooooooooooo German....

feel gym shoes are for kids, only take ONE pair on my feet when I travel, only lug ONE suitcase and nO carryon to hassle with

For some reason I can't help but staring at some fashion challenged farang wearing black shoes and shorts. Its like passing a motor accident, when you can't help but look for the bodies.

[Surfcrest]

Your suggestions for fashion would suggest that you are an elderly farang attempting to regain his youth by the use of what you consider to be current fashion trends although most of your suggestions are humorous and others quite laughable.

You appear intent in your posting about Balcony...blah...blah...blah....

Just relax and enjoy your stay in Thailand rather than appear to be on a mission to demean as much as possible. So far the postings of your trip would seem to indicate that you have spent all your time being as miserable as possible, so maybe it is your own attitude to others that brings you the response and service that you deserve.

Judging by the number of posts you've made I can only assume that you are hiding behind your hydra veil looking to speak for everyone. I never expect everyone or anyone to agree with what I post and this post was mostly for humour sake, a trait you seem to be a bit lacking in to get so worked up over it.

I've actually had a blast in the past two months, similar to the night I enjoyed last night entertaining the mamasans and door men at K-Boys.

Sorry to read you are still so bitter with my Balcony comments. It reminds me of the time I mentioned something about a certain guesthouse in Patong Beach.

Sorry also to spoil the illusion that I am some elderly farang attempting to regain his youth.....
I just happen to have many fag friends, read tons of fashion magazines and am grateful to all those (especially the elderly) that have given me some great tips over the years.

Now I'm quite relaxed sweetheart, but are you?

Keep Smiling!

Surfcrest

Judging by the number of posts you've made I can only assume that you are hiding behind your hydra veil looking to speak for everyone.

No need for a Hydra here. I have been reading this board for many months and never felt the urge to post until your recent postings where you appear to be intent on slagging of as many people and places as possible.

I have no reason to be bitter towards your comments on Balcony, I and many other thousands of people enjoy the place, the fact that you can do no better than to pick holes in the service is indicative of someone who feels that their own way of life is so perfect that all others must aim to achieve such a standard. I only feel sorry for you in as much as you are so worked up about a small hitch in the service and expecting everyone to move heaven and earth to satisfy you.

You still come over as an elderly farang jealous of those around him who are enjoying Thailand for what is and whilst you are still living in a past era as far as fashion is concerned.

I certainly do not expect to speak for anyone but myself unlike you who assume that the world and his mother hang on your every word waiting to improve their lives. Comments such as 'I tried to make the place more interesting' do no more than to show a degree of snobbishness which is a noticeable factor throughout your positings.

On your next visit here come with an open mind, leave your own everyday foibles at home and for once enjoy yourself without feeling the need to try and impress everyone with your critques that reflect more on your own insecurities than on what Thailand is really about.

Relax TIT and try to smile, you will find it works wonders. :cheers: :cheers:

[Surfcrest]

No need for a Hydra here. I have been reading this board for many months and never felt the urge to post until your recent postings where you appear to be intent on slagging of as many people and places as possible.



Sweetheart,

You were either not around for the hydra wars or you have forgotten some simple fundamentals.

You credibility extends no farther than the information under your avtar.
Unless I am mistaken, isn't today April 9th 2006?

If you don't like the tone of my posts don't read them.

Surfcrest

You were either not around for the hydra wars or you have forgotten some simple fundamentals.

You credibility extends no farther than the information under your avtar.
Unless I am mistaken, isn't today April 9th 2006?

If you don't like the tone of my posts don't read them.

Surfcrest

You are obvioulsy not aware that registration is not a pre-requisite to read the boards. Therefore the date below my Avatar is totally irelevant to whether or not I have read the boards. I have read both this and the previous boards for many months and am fully aware of the Hydra wars. It was not until your recent posts that I felt the merest urge to contribute.

As for the tone of your posts, this I find quite pretentious if not condescending and certainly not in keeping with someone out to enjoy himself, but more from someone whose only pleasure in life is trying to belittle his hosts rather than trying to enjoy himself. :bounce:

Surfcrest.
How dare you criticize the official uniform of the Thailand Chapter of the Long Yang Club.
This decade we all wear: Baggy Shorts, Faded Loose Fitting T Shirt, Sandals & Socks with Shoulder Bag and a Beer Belly.
And don't forget the Bald Patch and the Sun Glasses on a string round the neck.

Excuse me, but is it really that bad to wear sunglasses with a neckcord?
I have a fancy pair and because it is so easy to lose sunnies, I wear the cord.
Guess I might as well wear black socks with sandals and shorts to complete the look!

[DJB0Y-old]

Surfcrest--

Your comments are all very interesting. In fact, I was thinking about your post a few times yesterday....after having read it in the morning.

However, the question that kept returning to my mind was.....

what motivated you to write a post like this?

DJ

[bing]

Years ago when the guys used to meet on the terrace of Cafe Royalle on Wednesday evening for a drink. I was at Jomtien all day and had my long haired motorbike guy pick me up at 5:30 p.m. ( wanted to enjoy the day at the beach) then drop me at Boystown. I was walking back to the Ambiance, when I noticed all the guys at a big long table (actually several tables pushed together) with a rather ebullient aura flowing over to the sio. I remembered that this was the meeting night, so with Tiva river runners and a Gap T-shirt, plus a nondescript shorts. I sat down with the guys and had a perfectly wonderful early evening sipping on an adult beverage. Being dressed nice is a good thing, but it is far more important to be a gentlemen and welcome individuals based on their character rather than on threads. Thankfully the boys on the terrace were persons of great good taste and welcomed me, even though dressed for the beach. On the other hand, Surfcrest, I think your post was motivated by good intentions, even though some might not agree. Some times when traveling, one does not have all the choices one might have if he were at home, and had the leisure of browsing through the rainbow of colors and materials with which to adorn the bod. Attention guys, Pattaya is a tropical destination, so sometimes less is fine. That's my contribution to the fashion clique

DELETED

DELETED

[Surfcrest]

Surfcrest--

what motivated you to write a post like this?

DJ

DJBOY,

I was sitting out at Sunnee Plaza Pub last year watching the guys drift by.
There were a few things that I saw then, (mainly fanny packs) that I thoght I should say something about.
This year the worst has been those draw string shorts.

If you are openly gay at home and have gay friends, chances are your frinds have pointed out certain do's and don't to help you look better and feel better about yourself.

I see many great looking guys that could look even better with a few simple tips.
It's not about shucking evertything out of your closet and rebuilding with Gucci and Versace.

The motivation was mainly for fun (not poking fun), however, it hasn't transpired the way I had hoped.
Lesson learned.....

Take Care,

surfcrest

There's an article on packing in this Sunday's travel section: When Packing for a Trip, You Can't Win.

Murphy's Packing Law #1:
You've checked the weather every day for the past three weeks...Nary a cloud--So you pack for bright-and-sunny: Be prepared to go shopping for an umbrella or sweater.

Murphy's Packing Law #2:
Stains, rips and other clothing imperfections are invisible until you reach your destination.
Corollary Law: Your sewing kit never has the proper, matching, color of thread.

Murphy's Packing Law #3:
Shoes change size in luggage. (I think, in truth, feet swell for all the sitting en route. Add to that, walking you may not be used to doing much of--Except in A.C. malls.)

Murphy's Packing Law #4: No matter how much chic I try for, once I arrive--And unpack--it all looks...Blech!

Murphy's Packing Law #5: Conditioner can not be contained. Close it tightly, wrap in seven baggies, zip in a zip-lock, tuck it deeply into a pocket--It still manages to break free.
Corollary law: If my conditioner gives me a break, my sunscreen picks up the slack.

Murphy's Packing Law #6: No matter how carefully I pack, only one outfit will be perfectly suitable--And I'll wear it to death.
Corollary law: If I try packing the same outfit for another trip, regardless of similarity of climate, etc., it will be all wrong and I'll end up wearingsome other outfit over and over.

Really, it's a miracle I manage to dress myself at all. So if you see a falang who is dowdily dressed in stained, poorly mended and tired-looking rags, be sure to stop me and say hello.

But I think I've finally got it licked. Pick two outfits: cotton, washable; one casual, one a bit more dressy; both the same color, i.e.: all blue. Now, what ever else you pack should go with blue. Throw in something high-grub. Done.
Naturally, the high-grub (For me, high-grub means, unironed. The elephant slobber is unintentional.) is the one I will want to wear every day--But, now I'm as slim as a go-go boy...Okay, a stocky (I prefer, Stacked.) go-go boy...I dress like one. Num like it, I like it; anyone else, in the words of dear Princess Margaret Rose; can, "Feck off."

Some of us lead a charmed life. Unfortunately I'm not one, Dept.: My first trip to LOS. I wanted to go to the most fancy-schmancy restaurant in Bangkok. Laid out the suit, shirt & tie I would wear; imagined wearing that on the hottest day I've ever experienced: 113┬░F. Put it back in the closet. Suffered a heat-stroke on day five, anyway. But a very cute num helped me to my room. I guess I do lead a charmed life.

I only wear shorts to the beach, never after dark. Why? Mosquito's see those gorgeous gams and scream, "DINNER IS SERVED!"
And I never wear draw-string pants in public. Why? No...hips...to hold them up. But those of you who are blessed with enough to feed China, go for it!

I have been visiting Thailand for the past 8 years. I am 66. I will continue to wear socks with shoes to the beach to prevent bites from sand fleas and other assorted insects. Open sandals invite insect bites. I know.

another fashion faux pas as seen in this snap of Edith heading towards Jomtien..these shorts fitted when she was 15 (before she was sold to the Gypsies) but she still insists on wearing them. The moral being..wear your age !

I was once thrown out of Disneyland for wearing shorts that were too short..but that's another story.
http://upload4.postimage.org/165762/Fat20ass20in20shorts.jpg (http://upload4.postimage.org/165762/photo_hosting.html)

another fashion faux pas as seen in this snap of Edith heading towards Jomtien..these shorts fitted when she was 15 (before she was sold to the Gypsies) but she still insists on wearing them. The moral being..wear your age !

Those shorts are the reason the gypsies stole me--And the reason they brought me back: they heard someone say, "That ass is worth a fortune;" they misunderstood, "That ass can tell fortunes." I told the king to buy Edsels for everyone.
Anyway, why shouldn't I wear them?...as you can see, they still fit. I suppose you could get into them too (Yes, yes; I know it's said, "Anyone can get in Edith's pants"--Fun-ny...Not.); I mean, you could get in them...if you wore them as a turban!...And speaking of, wore; if you, "wore your age," dear, you'd be in a toga...a very old toga.



I was once thrown out of Disneyland for wearing shorts that were too short..but that's another story.

Honey, you were thrown out of worse places...dive-bars in Paris...for wearing veils that were too short!...but never mind; it was what was hanging out of those shorts that got you thrown out!...They thought you were trolling Cleo the Goldfish!
Little did they know, you were trying to lure Pinocchio...with a splinter!

Excuse me, but is it really that bad to wear sunglasses with a neckcord?
I have a fancy pair and because it is so easy to lose sunnies, I wear the cord.
Guess I might as well wear black socks with sandals and shorts to complete the look!

Go for it, Create your own look, Thaique, be an original!...Like Mae West! Like the queen I saw at Rlit's chairs dressed totally in stuff from the hill tribes--The hill tribes had a hit-man looking for her with a machete, but, WTH, she was havin' fun!
Me, I tried black-lace Opera-hose (Ever hear of the Phantom of the Opera Hose?) with four-inch heels and hot-pants. I stopped traffic! Okay, I fell in front of a tour bus!...but who's picky.

[Surfcrest]

I should probably let this topic die but......

If you were in Sunnee Plaza Monday night you probably saw a shirtless man walking around with a fanny pack hiked up above his hanging gut.

At least the Sunnee Street mafia left him alone.

Surfcrest