Being an ex-pat

Although this is from a book review about an American in London, its description of the ex-pat resonates

Though always perceived as a foreigner by the natives, you have a permanent stake in their politics and society. What seemed charming and novel to you as a visitor can quickly tire when you're a lifetime resident. However you may fancy your abilities as a chameleon, the inside of your head remains obstinately wedded to the assumptions and prejudices acquired in its country of origin. The longer one stays, the more jarring are these reminders of one's uprootedness: just when you're feeling most at home, an encounter at the supermarket checkout or an exchange at the dinner table reminds you that you are an outsider here.
Jonathan Rahan's review in the New York Review of Books of Sarah Lyall Norton's The Anglo Files

If you stay away from your home country long enough, you feel like that when you go back - at least, for the first few months. (And if you're returning from Thailand, you have to remember to stop smiling at pretty boys.)

(And if you're returning from Thailand, you have to remember to stop smiling at pretty boys.)I didn't realise that was possible :idea:

An ex-pat - a former Irishman? I might qualify as I've been away from all that blarney for so long. Now it's just all tolay :blackeye:Perhaps when the Thais refer to you as "Black Heart" they mean all that Guinness?

You have such a sweet way with words Homi. Luckily I've never been (knowingly) called Jai dum, and don't drink the black stuff.Yesterday's Duty Mem'sahib uttered the phrase "Why you the black heart today?" very early on in the proceedings. How could I explain that I was heart-broken at coming in second in the Forum's popularity poll. Perhaps with your intimate knowledge of the language you can tell me the Thai equivalent for "winners are grinners" (especially in the Land of Smile context, where grinners are not necessarily winners)

How could I explain that I was heart-broken at coming in second in the Forum's popularity poll. Perhaps with your intimate knowledge of the language you can tell me the Thai equivalent for "winners are grinners" (especially in the Land of Smile context, where grinners are not necessarily winners)

Ah - but thats very important to Thais.

You didnt lose - you came second. Finishing in 7th position is even better than saying you lost.

You didnt lose - you came second. Finishing in 7th position is even better than saying you lost.My view of the world is quite binary; I have no time for the notion that it doesn't matter whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game. There's first place - and there's everyone else. It runs in the family, of course. You'll have noticed my niece Aunty(Tourette)'s single-minded commitment to winning the Nobel Prize - http://www.sawatdee-gay-thailand.com/fo ... g.php?w=21 (http://www.sawatdee-gay-thailand.com/forum/weblog.php?w=21)

I don't relate well to the word "ex-pat," probably because I try to subscribe to the thought that "the wise man is a citizen of the world." I'm just someone born in California living where I please. And I don't have this "binary" American/Thai thing. When differences or difficulties arise, I can compare the situation here in Thailand with several other cultures I know well.

A succinct illustration of my point: many years ago, I was visited by a mad feminist. Somebody began playing a musical cassette tape (ha, I did say "many years ago!") and the mad feminist, after a few minutes, jumped up and demanded to know whether that was "a Thai tape or an American tape." I told her to relax, it was NEITHER ONE: it was a tape of then-superstar Andy Liu from Hong Kong.

I agree that I can have unusual or disconcerting moments in Thailand which make me realize that I "am not one of them." But I also think I am much more likely to have such experiences in America. Examples abound, too numerous to be mentioned, but one in particular is the Black Glare, when the boy bagging your groceries understands that you think he is attractive. I can only remember one exception to this in America, when I was buying some completely overt photo-magazines from the now-defunct XY organization in a Borders bookstore. I took these to the cashier to buy them, and was somewhat surprised to find that the guy who rang me up was a totally attractive blond hunk. Naturally, he inspected my purchases as he rang them up, and realized The Truth. Then he glanced at me, saw me smiling at him, and gave me a cute litte smile back!

But, in general, while I am living in America, I feel like some sort of Martian, while returning to countries such as Thailand, Tunisia, Vietnam etc. makes me feel much more at home. At least I don't have to deal with TV preachers and people ranting on and on endlessly about "homosexuality."

I don't relate well to the word "ex-pat," probably because I try to subscribe to the thought that "the wise man is a citizen of the world."

I couldn't agree with you more Henry. You should think about getting yourself one of these, there are over 950,000 of us now. ;)

http://i281.photobucket.com/albums/kk216/ThaiRakThai/docpass.gif

MY COUNTRY IS THE WORLD: A Citizen of no nation.


Cheers,


George.

You would have no trouble crossing from England to Scotland with that thing. Ony whaur else, ah hae ma doots laddie.

And if you're returning from Thailand ....I didn't realise that was possible

It isn't if you are on certain lists, Homi.

I couldn't agree with you more Henry.Why does that not surprise me?