Henry Cate's potted guide to American history !

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

The United States of Amerigo Vespucci were founded in 1776 by a national act of Civil Disobedience. After chasing the disobedient colonists around North America for several years, the British gave up all hope of administering a good spanking, and returned to Europe to give the French a good hiding.
***************
~ An American on the lack of American history
Americans originated from monkeys in Iceland and went on to turn into fat dog-humping retards. They accidentally travelled to Mexico in search of cocaine and more dogs to hump. Soon however, they were too stupid to maintain their dog-humping traditions and instead went on to hump trees
***************
Notable American Achievements
An American citizen managed to get out of his armchair on only his fifth attempt. Have been awardeded the IRPP (Independent Red Potatoe Prize)

They invented "friendly fire".
They invented "consistently inconsistent".
They invented "obesity".
They invented "the competitive eating".
They invented "collateral damage".
They invented "shit happens"
They invented "shit happens too often"
They invented "when shit happens you go and get some nukes"
They invented "deep throat"
They invented "bend down and grease over"
They invented "porn"
They invented "We Fuck Iraq 'till Iran will do it for us"
They invented "Brokeback Mountain"
They invented "Al Gore" (Who invented the internet)
They invented "Ann Coulter the Supreme Cunt"
They invented "Blue Screen of Death (BSoD)"
They invented "Oprah Winfrey"
They invented "Canada jokes"
They invented "101 ways to fuck up this world"
They invented "balding"
They invented "sucky bands such as The Dave Matthews Band(note Dave is actually fromSouth Africa
They invented "Communism"
They invented "the British"
They invented "Scientology(stupid ass cult believing in alien crap)"
They invented "killing for sport"
They invented "god"
They invented "Nazi Socialism"
They invented "Child molestation"
They invented "Online predators"
They invented "Cyber bullying"
They invented "Yo' Momma jokes"
They invented "Ignorance"
They invented "The whole universe"
They invented "This List of Inventions"

(Fast) Food
The average amount of caca (NeoEnglish for food) eaten a day by a average America citizen is 16, which all consists of 40 cokes 40 big macs and 40 live Arabs (if there are no Arabs around Mexicans are just as nice, how ever Canadians are much sought for).

Science
Americans are a notoriously superstitious people. According to a recent gallup poll, only 7% of Americans believe in gravity, while 79% believe "God is keeping them on the ground with his vast mental powers," and 10% remain undecided.

The People of USA
There are many different people living in the wasteland of USA though all are boring, and stupid and lack humour. Except George W. Bush (Classified as "That Fucking Evil Idiot" by an english dictionary). Some of the inhabitants are: fat whores, homosexual retards, fat asses, KKK, White men, Africans, Black Men, Yellow men, Bea Arthur, Blue men, Swedes, Chinese, Republicans, Homosexuals, Fags, Illegal immigrants, Legal immigrants, Red men, the French, Greys (a small colony on Area 51), Arabs, Idiots, This guy, Your Mom, Jesus freaks, Armadillos, Satanists, Pokemon, GI Joe, Rednecks, Liberals, White trash, between others.

much more at: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/USA

[Bob]

Don't you and Colonel Klink have better things to do than to try to wind up us yanks? I don't want to start explaining about all the nasty traditions we picked up from our colonial masters. Plus, if you piss us off, we'll nuke ya... :cheers:

The People of USA
There are many different people living in the wasteland of USA though all are boring, and stupid and lack humour. Except George W. Bush (Classified as "That Fucking Evil Idiot" by an english dictionary). Some of the inhabitants are: fat whores, homosexual retards, fat asses, KKK, White men, Africans, Black Men, Yellow men, Bea Arthur, Blue men, Swedes, Chinese, Republicans, Homosexuals, Fags, Illegal immigrants, Legal immigrants, Red men, the French, Greys (a small colony on Area 51), Arabs, Idiots, This guy, Your Mom, Jesus freaks, Armadillos, Satanists, Pokemon, GI Joe, Rednecks, Liberals, White trash, between others.


That is what makes this country great and why we don't let people like you in.

[Bob]

But Bob, you'll probably miss and it'll end up being 'friendly fire' - another silly expression that could only have come out of the land of the not so free.... :blackeye:

Horseshoes and nuclear weapons: only two games in town where all ya gotta be is close, fattman. :bom:

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

In the interests of bi-partisanship I give you some of Lunchtime's observations about the great island of Ireland :

The economic downfall of Ireland
Despite contrary belief of the potato being the national currency, oh hell, who am I kidding, of course it is. At one point in history, however, their main currency was alcohol. There were no potatoes to use for money during the famine, so they resorted to alcohol. They loved it so much, and needed it equally as much, that they were never able to give it to others. Business' collapsed, the British had little to steal, and there was a nationwide hangover everywhere across the land. They decided to use the potato, figuring that would make one payment instead of two to the English. This led to whiskey being a primary export, as they could not procure the Guinness producing gland from their bodies to get it out.

and we can't leave out Homitern who has said this about is homeland:
Australia is ruled by England's Queen Elizabeth II, a tyrannical and insane monarch who also runs things in New Zealand, Canada, America and India. The current government's international policy seems to be "It'll be fine, leave it" and apparently consists of doing the American army's work for them before heading off to the local pub, while the Americans take the absence as an opportunity to claim credit for winning the war.

Contrary to Popular Belief, Australia is still a colony of Great Britain. Queen Liz has pleaded with Australia to grow up and be independent. However, Australia prefers to still be governed by Great Britain for the sake of tradition, just like Americans prefer to be fat because they can't get off their behinds to save their lives, and the Japanese like to be productive and creative because they're stuck in the 1600s.



Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd in conference with his cabinet
http://i233.photobucket.com/albums/ee135/lunchtimeobooze/180px-jpg.jpg

Oh say can you see, an upgrade to USB ...

The United States of Amerigo Vespucci were founded in 1776 by a national act of Civil Disobedience. After chasing the disobedient colonists around North America for several years, the British gave up all hope of administering a good spanking, and returned to Europe to give the French a good hiding.
***************
~ An American on the lack of American history
Americans originated from monkeys in Iceland and went on to turn into fat dog-humping retards. They accidentally travelled to Mexico in search of cocaine and more dogs to hump. Soon however, they were too stupid to maintain their dog-humping traditions and instead went on to hump trees
***************
Notable American Achievements
An American citizen managed to get out of his armchair on only his fifth attempt. Have been awardeded the IRPP (Independent Red Potatoe Prize)

They invented "friendly fire".
They invented "consistently inconsistent".
They invented "obesity".
They invented "the competitive eating".
They invented "collateral damage".
They invented "shit happens"
They invented "shit happens too often"
They invented "when shit happens you go and get some nukes"
They invented "deep throat"
They invented "bend down and grease over"
They invented "porn"
They invented "We Fuck Iraq 'till Iran will do it for us"
They invented "Brokeback Mountain"
They invented "Al Gore" (Who invented the internet)
They invented "Ann Coulter the Supreme Cunt"
They invented "Blue Screen of Death (BSoD)"
They invented "Oprah Winfrey"
They invented "Canada jokes"
They invented "101 ways to fuck up this world"
They invented "balding"
They invented "sucky bands such as The Dave Matthews Band(note Dave is actually fromSouth Africa
They invented "Communism"
They invented "the British"
They invented "Scientology(stupid ass cult believing in alien crap)"
They invented "killing for sport"
They invented "god"
They invented "Nazi Socialism"
They invented "Child molestation"
They invented "Online predators"
They invented "Cyber bullying"
They invented "Yo' Momma jokes"
They invented "Ignorance"
They invented "The whole universe"
They invented "This List of Inventions"

(Fast) Food
The average amount of caca (NeoEnglish for food) eaten a day by a average America citizen is 16, which all consists of 40 cokes 40 big macs and 40 live Arabs (if there are no Arabs around Mexicans are just as nice, how ever Canadians are much sought for).

Science
Americans are a notoriously superstitious people. According to a recent gallup poll, only 7% of Americans believe in gravity, while 79% believe "God is keeping them on the ground with his vast mental powers," and 10% remain undecided.

The People of USA
There are many different people living in the wasteland of USA though all are boring, and stupid and lack humour. Except George W. Bush (Classified as "That Fucking Evil Idiot" by an english dictionary). Some of the inhabitants are: fat whores, homosexual retards, fat asses, KKK, White men, Africans, Black Men, Yellow men, Bea Arthur, Blue men, Swedes, Chinese, Republicans, Homosexuals, Fags, Illegal immigrants, Legal immigrants, Red men, the French, Greys (a small colony on Area 51), Arabs, Idiots, This guy, Your Mom, Jesus freaks, Armadillos, Satanists, Pokemon, GI Joe, Rednecks, Liberals, White trash, between others.

much more at: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/USA

You know, Mr. O'Booze, you can write crap forever, but why the fuck do you claim that I wrote it or said it?


There are many different people living in the wasteland of USA though all are boring, and stupid and lack humour.

Gee, kenc on another thread was kind of trying to deny this idiotic anti-Americanism.

But, there you go again. Myself, I think that ALL X are Y is idiotic, when the first term X refers to a country, unless it's self-referential. "All Spanish are Spanish" is true but not interesting. "All Spanish love bull-fights" is false. "Many Spanish like bull-fights" is open to investigation.

I don't know, Mr. O'Booze, but when you say "All Americans are boring and stupid," maybe you should take a quick peek at the man in the glass.

Notable American Achievements:

1. Establishment of the first modern constitutional democracy.
2. Establishment of the freedom of religion and the freedom of speech.
3. Successful development (still ongoing) of the largest untouched continent on Earth.
4. Successful acceptance of millions of refugees from around the globe.
5. Succeeding in abolishing slavery.
6. Helped England win WW I.
7. Helped England win WW II.
8. Led the Free World against the Communists, and won without firing a shot.
9. Took a large part in the invention of the computer.
10. Invented and commercialized jet transport for the common man.
11. Invented and commercialized the personal computer.
12. Invented and commercialized the Internet.
13. Discoverer of the vaccine against polio, etc. etc. etc.
14. Basically invented the whole idea of mass production and made automobiles available to all.
15. Invented the telephone and the electric light, plus sound recording.

This list could go on and on, but anyway, when you finish typing out your "God Damn America" tirade on your PC, and post it over the Internet to Sawatdee Forum, then call up a friend to say how much Americans piss you off, and then turn off the lights and turn on your stereo to go to sleep, while planning on your car trip to Hua Hin next month, please realize that No America = no PC, no Internet, no phone, no lights, no stereo and no car. (Yes, I am well aware that the Germans invented the car, but Henry Ford brought it to the millions.)

Oh, and when you plan your next trip home, think about who made that trip possible. (Can you say "Boeing" or "Howard Hughes?")

But all of this is simply too well-known to be worth repeating.

I do wish, though, at least sometimes, these crackpots would sit back and ask themselves, "After all, what have -- for example -- we ruddy British accomplished in the last fifty years?" Even more, you might ask yourself, "Was there something in our economic system that held people back?"

Envy is a truly ugly thing, and one of the seven deadly sins.

1. Establishment of the first modern constitutional democracy.

The Greeks having screwed it up and not made a constitution for lack of paper.

2. Establishment of the freedom of religion and the freedom of speech.

Except in Guantanamo Bay.

3. Successful development (still ongoing) of the largest untouched continent on Earth.

Lost me there. You're "touched". Did the indigenes have no hands?

4. Successful acceptance of millions of refugees from around the globe.

What is the measure of success. I have "reservations" (geddit?), about this.

5. Succeeding in abolishing slavery.

Long after the British and Romans.

6. Helped England win WW I.

Scotland helped more.

7. Helped England win WW II.
see 6. Dithered on whether to help Germany instead.

8. Led the Free World against the Communists, and won without firing a shot.

but tore up your own constitution to torture in Cuba - what's free about that?

9. Took a large part in the invention of the computer.

Oh yes. Hollerith, is it? Inventor of the chad and that truly undemocratic artifact the hanging chad through which the free world has been bushwhacked. cf. contributions of Babage, Turing,

10. Invented and commercialized jet transport for the common man.

The jet Engine was invented by Air Commodore Sir Frank Whittle, OM, KBE, FRS, Hon FRAeS who was English and of the Royal Air Force.

11. Invented and commercialized the personal computer.

Not an invention - a development see 9

12. Invented and commercialized the Internet.

Not an invention - a development, was it so that the CIA and Google could do what Metternich failed at.

13. Discoverer of the vaccine against polio, etc. etc. etc.

One of thousands of medical developments.

14. Basically invented the whole idea of mass production and made automobiles available to all.

leading to heinously enslaved workforces, but hey, they were descended from cotton pickin' slaves

15. Invented the telephone and the electric light, plus sound recording.

The telephone was invented by Alexander Graham Bell, a deaf Scot.

Should the title read POTTY rather than potted?

[cottmann]

..... please realize that No America = no PC, no Internet, no phone, no lights, no stereo and no car. (Yes, I am well aware that the Germans invented the car, but Henry Ford brought it to the millions.)

Oh, and when you plan your next trip home, think about who made that trip possible. (Can you say "Boeing" or "Howard Hughes?")

But all of this is simply too well-known to be worth repeating.

I do wish, though, at least sometimes, these crackpots would sit back and ask themselves, "After all, what have -- for example -- we ruddy British accomplished in the last fifty years?" Even more, you might ask yourself, "Was there something in our economic system that held people back?"

Envy is a truly ugly thing, and one of the seven deadly sins.

Oh Henry, wrong again.

No America = no PC? Ever heard of Konrad Zuse? He was a German who invented the first programmable computer - in 1941. IBM opted his patents.

No America = no Internet? Ever heard of Tim Berners-Lee and CERN? Even Dan Brown got the invention of the Internet right.

No America = no lights? Ever heard of Joseph W Swan? He was a British inventor who, in February 1879, demonstrated a working lamp in a lecture in Newcastle. His lamps contained the major elements seen in Edison's lamps that October: an enclosed glass bulb from which all air had been removed, platinum lead wires, and a light-emitting element made from carbon. He's the other half of the Swan and Edison company.

No America = no stereo? Ever heard of Alan Blumlein. He was the British inventor of stereo (British patent No. 394325, 1933) (BTW, the BBC made radio's first stereo broadcast in December 1925).

And when I plan my next trip home, it will probably be on a plane made by Airbus. And why would I want to say "Howard Hughes"?

As for modern British inventions and discoveries of the last 50 or so years, how about DNA, the technology behind the iPod (Kane Kramer), Viagra (Andrew Bell, Dr David Brown and Dr Nicholas Terrett, Pfizer employees in Kent, UK), and the hovercraft just to name a few?

Oh, and Henry Ford may have brought the car to millions, but his mass production methods owed everything to the British inventor, Henry Maudslay, whose contribution to modern mass production was the invention of precision machine tools capable of producing the identical parts necessary for mass production techniques; British industrial tool-making at the time was so much better than American! Credit where credit is due.


..... But all of this is simply too well-known to be worth repeating......

No, what you think is so, isn't so!


..... Envy is a truly ugly thing, and one of the seven deadly sins.

So is pride - on every list the original and most serious of the seven deadly sins - but the one in which you love to indulge (though often it seems to be hubris - overweening pride, self-confidence, superciliousness, or arrogance)!

[thrillbill]

Maybe I should look at some of these posts as "humor" but I detect a couple REAL American haters. Scary to think well educated people on this post could be so filled with venom. AS an American (and I am NOT a Bush lover) if I had it my way, I'd like to see the USA stay out of world politics (in other words #uck it) and spend the bucks (well, borrowed money) on themselves. YES, I am also tired of the USA "policing the world". Most of the screwed up fanatic countries are located in the back door of Europe, so let them worry about it.

Maybe I should look at some of these posts as "humor" but I detect a couple REAL American haters. Scary to think well educated people on this post could be so filled with venom. AS an American (and I am NOT a Bush lover) if I had it my way, I'd like to see the USA stay out of world politics (in other words #uck it) and spend the bucks (well, borrowed money) on themselves. YES, I am also tired of the USA "policing the world". Most of the screwed up fanatic countries are located in the back door of Europe, so let them worry about it.The word you're looking for is "isolationist", a theme with a long following in the US. However, with modern trade and other integration, such a thought is wishful thinking - unless you're a North Korean. If you want the US to be truly isolationist, perhaps you could start with the policy yourself, and show us all an example

[PeterUK]

Maybe I should look at some of these posts as "humor" but I detect a couple REAL American haters. Scary to think well educated people on this post could be so filled with venom.

I agree with you, thrillbill. America's image has become tarnished under Bush, but if there has to be one superpower in the world I know I would still want it to be America. China, anybody? Russia?

Nice post Cottman. Of course the truth is that useful artefacts and innovations are invented, developed and designed by people in social situations and markets rather than countries. They are unlikely to have been driven by national pride. So when their less talented compatriots come along decades or even centuries later and claim such and such an artifact as Chinese, Egyptian, Swiss, Russian, Scots or even American it is ignoring the connectedness of sometimes ancient collaboration and information dissemination mechanisms. Further, some technology transfers and developments get wrongly attributed. A recent American film attributes the breaking of the Enigma code to Americans. But was Turing British or Italian - he wasn't American. He was certainly homosexual but thought that unimportant. My guess is that if he was proud of anything he was most proud of being a mathematician.

No one person can be attributed with the "invention" of modern computing and nearly all work is done incrementally. In the early days of electronic computing there were three significant machines being built in the UK and probably as many in the States. The personalities behind these machines were not friends but they all read each other's papers avidly. The original internet was set up as a response to Russian missile threats in America but Sir Tim Berners-Lee's coding standard appeared at the right time, defined by the decision to allow commerce on the internet, to spread like wild-fire making the World Wide Web the dominant standard. The secodary factor in its wildfire acceptance was that it was simple and elegant. Places like CERN don't look at someone's nationality before giving them resources to develop their ideas and to collaborate on the funded project. Often the most valuable outcomes of large scientific funded projects are unintended fall-out such as Berner-Lee's simple standards or teflon which is widely thought to have come out of the space race.

It's the narrow nationalism that is the problem, not the inventors, developers or designers who more often than not see themselves as global players.

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

You know, Mr. O'Booze, you can write crap forever, but why the fuck do you claim that I wrote it or said it?
Quote:
There are many different people living in the wasteland of USA though all are boring, and stupid and lack humour.

Gee, kenc on another thread was kind of trying to deny this idiotic anti-Americanism.

there is one thing we know for sure..American humour lacks irony. :pale:

Nice post Cottman. Of course the truth is that useful artefacts and innovations are invented, developed and designed by people in social situations and markets rather than countries. They are unlikely to have been driven by national pride. So when their less talented compatriots come along decades or even centuries later and claim such and such an artifact as Chinese, Egyptian, Swiss, Russian, Scots or even American it is ignoring the connectedness of sometimes ancient collaboration and information dissemination mechanisms. Further, some technology transfers and developments get wrongly attributed. A recent American film attributes the breaking of the Enigma code to Americans. But was Turing British or Italian - he wasn't American. He was certainly homosexual but thought that unimportant. My guess is that if he was proud of anything he was most proud of being a mathematician.

No one person can be attributed with the "invention" of modern computing and nearly all work is done incrementally. In the early days of electronic computing there were three significant machines being built in the UK and probably as many in the States. The personalities behind these machines were not friends but they all read each other's papers avidly. The original internet was set up as a response to Russian missile threats in America but Sir Tim Berners-Lee's coding standard appeared at the right time, defined by the decision to allow commerce on the internet, to spread like wild-fire making the World Wide Web the dominant standard. The secodary factor in its wildfire acceptance was that it was simple and elegant. Places like CERN don't look at someone's nationality before giving them resources to develop their ideas and to collaborate on the funded project. Often the most valuable outcomes of large scientific funded projects are unintended fall-out such as Berner-Lee's simple standards or teflon which is widely thought to have come out of the space race.

It's the narrow nationalism that is the problem, not the inventors, developers or designers who more often than not see themselves as global players.

Your posting reminds me of that excellent TV series, "Connections," done by James Burke, I believe. I certainly agree that no one person "invented" the computer (most certainly, not Ada). But I never said this, did I.

I think I said that America invented the Internet. I did not mention the more important TCP/IP protocol which is today omnipresent. Definitely, the WWW add-on and HTML came later. But I believe that the decision to permit the commercialization of the Internet came even later.

I can understand how you came to think that I am a "narrow nationalist," because I was replying to the absurd posting by Mr. O'Booze. According to him, the only thing America has ever invented is "friendly fire." That gives me a good laugh. When, millions of years ago, Ourgh and Blourgh were out hunting mammoths -- Blourgh took aim at the mammoth's eye, and then shot Ourgh by mistake! Whoops! Human error! This year, the Americans call this sort of fuck-up "friendly fire." But I am absolutely certain that Americans were not the first people on this planet to screw up.

Perhaps we could all agree on that suggestion?

It's the narrow nationalism that is the problem, not the inventors, developers or designers who more often than not see themselves as global players.While that is true, nation-states play a role in encouraging or, more often, discouraging innovation. One of the much-discussed historical questions is why science and innovation ground to a halt in China six or seven hundred years ago. My view is that the Chinese government did not want to lose control; letting people innovate inevitably leads to such a loss. A modern-day parallel is what's happening in China right now with the tainted-milk-products scandal; the Chinese government faces the dilemma that enforcing standards means an independent standards authority that can, where necessary, stand up to vested interests including state and national governments. However to allow such a thing would detract from the Communist Party and its control over the organs of government. They would have to relinquish some control - forever and irrevocably

Traditional societies eg. East Asian ones, have strong cultural behaviours about authority and respect for seniors and superiors bulit in. It is not an accident, but a cultural outcome, that proportionately the number of Nobel Prize winners for science in Japan is much lower than the West. Japanese scientists know that to win a Nobel Prize almost inevitably they must challenge the assumptions and teachings of their professors. That is so difficult to do, culturally, that very often the only solution is to migrate

Invention, development and innovation are the product of more open societies which still means, these days, the post-Enlightenment West with its strong tradition of scepticism and its political corollary, democracy. To take an analogy from environmental science, we know that an environment is ecologically heathy the more biodiversity it supports, while maintaining an ecosystem in equilibrium. A cultural and political environment is healthy the more cultural and political diversity it can sustain while maintaining political and social equilibrium. That is the balancing act for democracies, and while they succeed this or any other century will not be the one where "Asian values" triumph

.....
Gee, kenc on another thread was kind of trying to deny this idiotic anti-Americanism.....

Ohhh no. Don't drag me into this thread.
You should know by now Henry, Boozy is just being sarcastic and trying to wind you up.

These America vs Britian spats are just schoolyard fights. They go round and round in circles and usually end with everyone playing "WW2 Trivial Pursuit".

For those who need a potted history of the Chinese contaminated powdered milk fiasco, here it is - http://www.economist.com/world/asia/dis ... d=12262271 (http://www.economist.com/world/asia/displaystory.cfm?story_id=12262271)

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

"These America vs Britian spats are just schoolyard fights. They go round and round in circles and usually end with everyone playing "WW2 Trivial Pursuit".'

is that why people keep calling me a big girl ?

Any such list, for any country, is pretty childish, so on that note HC appears to be well to the back of the kindergarten class. Most of his points have been covered / rebutted already but:

1. Establishment of the first modern constitutional democracy.

The first? In 1966, when blacks were finally given the vote?

3. Successful development (still ongoing) of the largest untouched continent on Earth.

If it is "untouched" how can it have been successfully developed?

7. Helped England win WW II.

Along with Russia, who suffered at least 10,700,000 military deaths, as well as 11,400,000 civilians killed - 13.71% of the population (USA 0.32%)

8. Led the Free World against the Communists, and won without firing a shot.

Won what?

10. Invented and commercialized jet transport for the common man.

Sir Frank Whittle invented the jet engine in 1928 and patented it in 1930.

[Wesley]

If this were not so funny and it was not Mr Booze who opened the post I would have forgotten all about what a good humor I have.

Wes

[Marsilius]

Any such list, for any country, is pretty childish, so on that note HC appears to be well to the back of the kindergarten class. Most of his points have been covered / rebutted already but:

1. Establishment of the first modern constitutional democracy.

The first? In 1966, when blacks were finally given the vote?



Many millions of American citizens are still permanently disenfranchised, i.e. convicted criminals who have served their sentence, "paid their debt to society", been released but are still barred from voting (and hence fully reintegrating into that same society) for the rest of their lives.

See http://hrw.org/english/docs/1998/10/22/usdom1351.htm and note the brief quotation from Jamie Fellner in the small box on the left. As far as I can find, the situation has got even worse since the date of that report. See also http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/ar ... Aug17.html (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A9785-2004Aug17.html)

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

An interesting one Marsilius and yet another aspect of American democracy that puzzles me especially as voting in the US isn't compulsory anyway.

It's fairly easy to get arrested in the US as well and just as easy to go to jail. They do seem to incarcerate too many of their citizens.

It still all goes back to those wretched Pilgrims who set the standard. And what were they ?. Why British of course.

[cottmann]

.....It still all goes back to those wretched Pilgrims who set the standard. And what were they ?. Why British of course.

Not British but English (see http://www.mayflowerhistory.com/History/pilgrim2.php.)

Only 35 of the 102 passengers on the Mayflower were Pilgrims, and some historians think they may have either hijacked the ship or bribed the captain to land them in Massachusetts, as the vessel was originally bound for the new Virginia colony. In any event, their landing shows the possible long-term effects of native populations have no sensible immigration policy.

Marsilius,

I am truly stunned at this - thanks for posting that.

In seven states, a staggering one in four black men is permanently disenfranchised. In two states, Alabama and Florida, the ratio is one in three

Any felony can trigger disenfranchisement. A first-time young offender who pleads guilty to a single drug sale and is placed on probation can lose the right to vote for a lifetime.

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

.....It still all goes back to those wretched Pilgrims who set the standard. And what were they ?. Why British of course.

Not British but English (see http://www.mayflowerhistory.com/History/pilgrim2.php.)

Only 35 of the 102 passengers on the Mayflower were Pilgrims, and some historians think they may have either hijacked the ship or bribed the captain to land them in Massachusetts, as the vessel was originally bound for the new Virginia colony. In any event, their landing shows the possible long-term effects of native populations have no sensible immigration policy.

Ok..it was the Poms and they were briggands to boot !

[Wesley]

We are what we are, may be not as free as we think or as open to new idea's and more of a European way of thought. However this thread not withstanding who wrote it is disgusting to any American. I find it pompous and about as snub nosed as the Brits can make it. I always knew you guys had a feather up your arse. Now I am sure of it. You act write and pretend to each other you are superior in every way to any other group of people. You say with your own voice and declare your own distaste for anyone not British as if it were some gift from God.

I have no idea the origins of Mr. O' Booze, he talks of so many. But, this was in my opinion, out of line. That said lets all have a drink and chase another boy.

Wes

Any such list, for any country, is pretty childish, so on that note HC appears to be well to the back of the kindergarten class. Most of his points have been covered / rebutted already but:

1. Establishment of the first modern constitutional democracy.

The first? In 1966, when blacks were finally given the vote?



Many millions of American citizens are still permently disenfranchised, i.e. convicted criminals who have served their sentence, "paid their debt to society", been released but are still barred from voting (and hence fully reintegrating into that same society) for the rest of their lives.

See http://hrw.org/english/docs/1998/10/22/usdom1351.htm and note the brief quotation from Jamie Fellner in the small box on the left. As far as I can find, the situation has got even worse since the date of that report. See also http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/ar ... Aug17.html (http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A9785-2004Aug17.html)

Convicted felons cannot vote in the USA. If you want to vote, then don't commit a felony.

Note well that this penalty does not apply to those convicted of misdemeanor crimes.

So, is this a good idea, or not? The Democrats are trying to get this rule rejected.

And so are YOU.

Wesley said:
I have no idea the origins of Mr. O' Booze

The clue is in the name. The Irish fought long and hard to leave the United Kingdom which is where the British come from. I respect their decision but welcome their wholly sensible and responsible participation in the EU. Blaming their misdemeanours on the British beggars belief. Your post displays the bigotry you accuse others of and one has to wonder whether it was written under the influence of a stronger intoxicant than your latest pinnoy.

[Wesley]

Wesley said:
I have no idea the origins of Mr. O' Booze

The clue is in the name. The Irish fought long and hard to leave the United Kingdom which is where the British come from. I respect their decision but welcome their wholly sensible and responsible participation in the EU. Blaming their misdemeanours on the British beggars belief. Your post displays the bigotry you accuse others of and one has to wonder whether it was written under the influence of a stronger intoxicant than your latest pinnoy.

I only get a bit upset after months of the Anti-American junk that infectects this forum. Actually, your best off spring were the Aussies. I can't remember one Anti-Brit thread unless it was when bush and Blair were Buddies. Its just that it gets old after a while. Gosh, you guys are gonna Run poor Henry off the forum. After all these years you would think we could let something slide ocassioanlly. But every oportunity to make it tough with bigoted words like high on a Pinnoy. I happen to think the guys here look good and I have never been much of a drunk. I only get sick, not drunk. So I don't bother. What is your excuse for your arrogance and bitterness. Actually, some of my best friends in the world are Brits and Aussies. I never have anything but good to say about you guys. You are all over the world with some shop of some kind, often in the worst envireoments and making a livng in places others won't tred. Why not ease up a bit. Homi, I can understand , hei s just a bitter old cunt but you , I thought better of.

Wes

What is your excuse for your arrogance and bitterness.

Constant completely unjustifiable side swipes at the British and English on this forum. If you post "I find it pompous and about as snub nosed as the Brits can make it" when the original isn't even posted by someone British I don't think I'm being arrogant and bitter to call you on it, I just think your faculties must be impaired.

Notable American Achievements:

1. Establishment of the first modern constitutional democracy.
2. Establishment of the freedom of religion and the freedom of speech.
3. Successful development (still ongoing) of the largest untouched continent on Earth.
4. Successful acceptance of millions of refugees from around the globe.
5. Succeeding in abolishing slavery.
6. Helped England win WW I.
7. Helped England win WW II.
8. Led the Free World against the Communists, and won without firing a shot.
9. Took a large part in the invention of the computer.
10. Invented and commercialized jet transport for the common man.
11. Invented and commercialized the personal computer.
12. Invented and commercialized the Internet.
13. Discoverer of the vaccine against polio, etc. etc. etc.
14. Basically invented the whole idea of mass production and made automobiles available to all.
15. Invented the telephone and the electric light, plus sound recording.

This list could go on and on, but anyway, when you finish typing out your "God Damn America" tirade on your PC, and post it over the Internet to Sawatdee Forum, then call up a friend to say how much Americans piss you off, and then turn off the lights and turn on your stereo to go to sleep, while planning on your car trip to Hua Hin next month, please realize that No America = no PC, no Internet, no phone, no lights, no stereo and no car. (Yes, I am well aware that the Germans invented the car, but Henry Ford brought it to the millions.)

Oh, and when you plan your next trip home, think about who made that trip possible. (Can you say "Boeing" or "Howard Hughes?")

But all of this is simply too well-known to be worth repeating.

I do wish, though, at least sometimes, these crackpots would sit back and ask themselves, "After all, what have -- for example -- we ruddy British accomplished in the last fifty years?" Even more, you might ask yourself, "Was there something in our economic system that held people back?"

Envy is a truly ugly thing, and one of the seven deadly sins.

I would like to suggest that you go back through your list and correct the errors, or you will be in for the usual barrage of nasty postings.

I will be in for the usual barrage of nasty postings whether I follow your advice or not. :geek:

I haven't seen the need to change one syllable, so far. Let's take the computer. I actually wrote:


9. Took a large part in the invention of the computer.

What I was trying to condense into one short sentence was the complexity of the actual invention. I credit Turing most, but the actual PLACE where people started making and selling computers is basically spelled IBM. Konrad Zuse was a brilliant man:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Konrad_Zuse

But Zuse took no part in the actual invention of the REAL computers made by IBM. Yes, IBM bought up his patents. Good for Zuse, and good for IBM, which, by the way, radically underestimated the market for these new devices. I believe that the genius running the show at IBM thought that they might be able to sell a dozen a year.

But yes: Germans love to trot out old Konrad as proof that they were really there before anyone else. My take is: they were close, but UNFORTUNATELY they had a crazy Fascist leader running their country, got involved in a huge war, and lost that war.

Another thing I wrote:


11. Invented and commercialized the personal computer.

Well, someone criticized this as being a mere "development." That's because it's impossible to deny the originator of this idea. To back up for a moment, the original IBM mainframes were based on the technology of the vacuum tube. A few decades later, DEC invented the computer based on the transistor, and changed the computing world. It only remained for some other Americans (debate rages between TI and Intel) to re-base the computer on the Integrated Circuit, beyond all doubt an American invention.

So the computer population soared -- from a couple thousand IBM mainframes, based on tubes -- to a few hundred thousand minicomputers, based on transistors -- to MILLIONS, based on the IC. Some "development" that was -- and Europe was NOWHERE during all these years!! Nowhere! They had NO comprehension of the issues involved, they had no experience in manufacturing this equipment, they were just totally lost.

When I worked at ROLM, and IBM sold me to Siemens, I was amazed to find Siemens (in the 1980's!!!!) bringing their "mainframe" to California, the world-unknown "BS2000," along with highly-paid support engineers. Even funnier, the "BS2000" was the result of a joint venture between Siemens and Control Data! Even more funny: despite the number of times that the Germans were politely told that "BS" meant "bullshit," they never changed the name of that dinosaur.

Then Siemens brought out their PC, priced at $9,000.

So: the invention and sale of the PC may have been a mere "development," but I challenge someone to name any European firm which is a successful player in this market.

A toast to Konrad Zuse, and all the Europeans who ignored him!!!

[Marsilius]

I have no idea the origins of Mr. O' Booze, he talks of so many. But, this was in my opinion, out of line. That said lets all have a drink and chase another boy.

Wes

The origins of "Lunchtime O'Booze" lie in the UK satirical magazine Private Eye. He has featured for many years, in that august organ, as a stereotypical Fleet Street hack whose afternoon/evening compositions for the next day's edition of his newspaper are likely to have been made more "colourful" by his lunchtime visit to the local pub.

He shares his newsroom with his colleague, the newspaper's well-known music critic Lunchtime O'Boulez.

[Wesley]

What is your excuse for your arrogance and bitterness.

Constant completely unjustifiable side swipes at the British and English on this forum. If you post "I find it pompous and about as snub nosed as the Brits can make it" when the original isn't even posted by someone British I don't think I'm being arrogant and bitter to call you on it, I just think your faculties must be impaired.

I was, if you read carefully, talking about the general Anti-American insults on this forum, as if we were so terrible as to think we may need to be exterminated as in the Holocaust, letтАЩs get rid of the poor stupid bastards. If I say good things well about the Brits and still get vitriol in return. Why should I care, ItтАЩs as if you really could care less what I say or think and not only me but any American, is it that IтАЩm so different that you feel I must be reviled. Called stupid having less than my faculties. I just donтАЩt have a gift at writing; it makes my opinion no less important than yours. , it has nothing to do with my ability to think, care, cry, hope and seek adventure in life. IтАЩm the last of the bitter ones. I just occasionally get tired of all the American vitriol and even more upset that the rest of the qualified Americans on the forum are not willing to stand up for themselves. I realize and admit we have had a tough 8 years, not only so but, admit it outright. However, I can not say what any of us would have done after such things happening during those 8 years, Bush was dammed if he did and dammed if He didnтАЩt do something about 9-11. I personally think he should have finished with Afghanistan, but who knows what the Pentagon was feeding him as a steady diet. It is one thing to question someoneтАЩs actions quite another to question his motives. Even the journalist stop there, realizing they donтАЩt knows the heart of men or angles. Yet, you come along with judgments and if I am right, on day judged by them. Mercy begets mercy, in a day and era when there is much to little of Mercy or grace, or in the turning of the cheek, it seems you and others like you would find something good to say about their neighbor and friends on the forum, yet you provoke people like me who have never felt the need to make myself seem good by making others seem small. You were likely the school yard bully and have carried it into your old age.

Maybe you should temper your posts with a bit of care for your fellow human beings, make a few friends. After all, a real friend and good friends are so hard to come by. As much as I am buffeted by Homi I find a place or, opportunity to just let his words pass as what they are, short often funny one liners. Ah, but if you could do the same. But you are of no such quality and it would serve you better not to try to be like him. Less of you and more of Homi at this point would be a blessing. Ah, but you must remain center stage to gratify your need to needed and loved and admired by your failing quick wit and lack of compassion. What a bleeding heart it is as you silently cry out for others to make you feel important. I like myself, just as I am and need no one to make me feel better about me. I have at least lived up to my own conscience and my own internal laws Witten on my own heart as a guide to how I treat others. Even the kids know the golden rule; you must have missed your childhood.

No matter, I waste my time on you I think. I am sure you will prove me right with some retort off the cuff and meant to degrade or malign others or me. The sad part really is, I really donтАЩt care ,I had expected better of you, but you ganging up on some one already down and out numbered like Henry me and others to gratify your own lust for self esteem is really so child like, I feel sorry for you. In as much as you seem to be intelligent well written and usually of a good nature. Maybe, I was wrong, maybe you are everything you seem not be in your most recent posts. It seems logical you would pick on someone of your own caliber like Homiturn or Smiles if you wish to prove how smart bright and intelligent you are, why not spar with someone in your own class instead of some one who, in your own words consider to be less than provocative intellectually gifted as you are.

Wes

[cottmann]

I haven't seen the need to change one syllable, so far. Let's take the computer. .....

Henry states that the Europeans were absent during the invention/development of the computer but ignores the fact that the first two computers built using von Neumann architecture (from which all subsequent computers derive, I believe) were built in the UK. On 21 June 1948, Frederic C. Williams of the University of Manchester managed to run the prototype of the Manchester Mark I, and thus proved it was possible to build a stored-program, universal computer. The first really functional von Neumann computer was built by Maurice Wilkes at Cambridge University.

Henry's little saga also forgets the role played in the invention of the computer (and much of the USA's technological economy) by that country's military-industrial complex. Chomsky, even if taken with a lot of salt, has some interesting things to say on this, in his interview with Subrata Ghosroy, at http://www.alternet.org/audits/101530/c ... happen%22/ (http://www.alternet.org/audits/101530/chomsky%3A_%22if_the_u.s._carries_out_terrorism%2C _it_did_not_happen%22/)

ItтАЩs as if you really could care less what I say or think

You've got it in one - and it has nothing to do with your (or HC's) nationality.

Henry states that the Europeans were absent during the invention/development of the computer

What I actually SAID was that Europeans were absent during the invention of the microcomputer.

Regarding the invention of the computer itself, I have only said that America played a large part in bringing it to life. The principal players were:

(first) Alan Turing

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alan_turing

(second) John von Neumann.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_von_Neumann

and many others! But it does not seem to be to be my job here -- to explain the extraordinary development of the computer. Especially to people looking for the nationalistic "sound bite" rather than any serious discusssion of the issues involved.

I repeat, once again, that America only played "a large part" in this development, primarily by bringing such people as Turing and von Neumann together.

Bu there have been a kazillion books written on this, so I will stop now.

[Beachlover]

I haven't read through the whole thread... but I would just say that America has a lot to be proud of. A lot of the most useful technologies and things we use come from the US and they've achieved a lot of good things.

They are far from perfect and there's a lot of things undesirable about the US but the same can be said about a lot of countries. And just because there may be some really undesirable things about them... doesn't make them a write off to be slandered to no end.

All the great superpowers have achieved great things, but also pissed off many in doing so. The British were utterly brutal. They practically raped India.

China is next... or will they break the trend?

[cottmann]

Henry states that the Europeans were absent during the invention/development of the computer

What I actually SAID was that Europeans were absent during the invention of the microcomputer. ..........

Well, Henry, I have read and re-read your earlier postings and cannot actually find the word "microcomputer" in any of your postings over than the one quote above.

As for being absent, Spectrum Research Ltd released the ZX Spectrum in 1982, so-called to highlight its color display and to contrast it with its predecessor the Sinclair ZX81 (released in 1981) and ZX80 (released in 1980). The company was based in Cambridge, England, and its founder was Sir Clive Sinclair, who invented the world's first pocket calculator, the Sinclair Executive. Amstrad bought the company in 1986. Amstrad was another British company in the PC, founded in 1968. It manufactured PCs from the early 1980s too.

[Wesley]

Henry states that the Europeans were absent during the invention/development of the computer

What I actually SAID was that Europeans were absent during the invention of the microcomputer. ..........

Well, Henry, I have read and re-read your earlier postings and cannot actually find the word "microcomputer" in any of your postings over than the one quote above.

As for being absent, Spectrum Research Ltd released the ZX Spectrum in 1982, so-called to highlight its color display and to contrast it with its predecessor the Sinclair ZX81 (released in 1981) and ZX80 (released in 1980). The company was based in Cambridge, England, and its founder was Sir Clive Sinclair, who invented the world's first pocket calculator, the Sinclair Executive. Amstrad bought the company in 1986. Amstrad was another British company in the PC, founded in 1968. It manufactured PCs from the early 1980s too.


We are on Mars and the Chinese are just now making thier first space walk, Much of our people are imported for sure, nevertheless the land of the free has some majior accomplishments and no task seems to be to big for them to undertake a shot at it.

So, you can say what you will abaout me and Cates and other Americans, its time Americans say as in the... U tube post, I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it any more .

To few of us sit in the lurkign mood, when many of you have the inteligence and writing ablity to respond to some ofthe ant-American sentiment so often posted on this board. Its time to stand up and be counted. You don't need to jump into a thread like thisoen, but begin to post gain some respecabulity and begin to have our say as well. Surely their are better writers out thre than me and Cates. Its time you voice your mind and say what you think, that is unless you agree with much of the junk posted about Americans here.

Wes

The trouble is Wes, there is just as much Brit-bashing, not just in this board but also, very strongly from Hollywood, where it seems that every villain must have an English or yarpie accent. You ask for brighter Americans to support your stance. Perhaps the brighter folk have worked out that it's not as simple as you'd paint it and that appeals to nationalistic sentiments are merely manipulation.

Perhaps the brighter folk have worked out that it's not as simple as you'd paint it and that appeals to nationalistic sentiments are merely manipulation.Bright? Wesley?

[Wesley]

I have found the British to be quite good people, and Hollywood takes no captives, I see them as likely to paint the Russians as the evil guys who have peculiar English accent since few can really depict the Russian accent and it be understandable to the average guy on the street. Actually, until the Bush debacles this kind of resentment for Americans was not seen on here, at least not in the number of posts and hanging on of almost every well written Brit. I have been watching the board for years and I cannot remember such. Not to mention I get PMs from guys who would like to join in but fear the backlash and the sheer guts it takes to take you guys on in a written debate. It is not just here but across all the continents that the Americans, are not as likely to venture away from home with the present sentiment world wide. Often, due to Bush or American policies which often, most American do not approve of themselves thus, the revolt to a black president bent in restoring the the American place in the world. Obama will win, based on the need for Change only. He has no record, nothing he has ever really done, yet the voice of change that he preaches in his Martin Luther king oratory takes on the crowds wishing for a real change in Washington and the world.

So, I get PM's and emails about how they feel but most afraid to venture to take the chance of getting into it with those who, over the years have sharpened their written debate. So, I am not alone, I am just he only one with guts enough to say what I think.

[Wesley]

Perhaps the brighter folk have worked out that it's not as simple as you'd paint it and that appeals to nationalistic

.Bright? Wesley?

If you plan to keep me on igore then mange to keep your mouth shut as well

Surely their are better writers out thre than me and Cates.

Agreed.