Neung 1973-2008 - Farewell my Special Friend.

Some who read or post to this Forum may have known or recognise Neung.

He was a familiar face in Pattaya a few years ago. I first met him in 2003 when he was a Go Go Boy at the original "Thai Boys Boys" which subsequently closed although it's now been resurrected further up Pattayaland Soi 1.

To my eyes he was strikingly attractive and we got on well at once. To call any Thai "fun loving" is rather stating the obvious but it fitted Neung so well. He was easy to be with but difficult to know. That took time and many more trips to Pattaya.

But gradually the transition from paid companion to genuine friend took place imperceptibly. On all the early trips Neung was still a Go Go Boy. The choice of hats varied but he stayed the same fun loving guy:

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c156/Jons_photos/Neung_05.jpg

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c156/Jons_photos/Neung_02.jpg

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c156/Jons_photos/Neung_03.jpg

Then he abandoned hats:

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c156/Jons_photos/Neung_04.jpg

When "Thai Boys Boys" closed he moved onto "Gacuya" (also now no more) and then briefly became a waiter.

But he'd never liked being a Go Go Boy and he then left Pattaya altogether. I would still see him though and was always amazed at the "Pattaya Grapevine" which never failed to let him know I'd been seen in Pattaya. On one occasion I merely walked through "Boys Town", on my first morning, and someone must have spotted me as he turned up in my hotel reception that evening grinning from ear to ear at how clever he'd been to find me. Emails weren't necessary to tell him I'd arrived, the Grapevine always did that.

Neung loved to party and as we shared a birthday one day we were going to have a party together but the dates of my trips never coincided with the right day.

One party I remember particularly was the house warming of some of his friends. It started early in the morning with a ceremony with local monks seated on the floor in the new house. I was the only Farang and they kept deferring to me in ceremonies that I found baffling. As I struggled to keep my head lower than the diminutive monks I would catch Neung's eye as he grinned at my discomfort. Once the monks had gone the party started and went on all the rest of the day and night. I bailed out early but Neung didn't reappear until the next day and then slept for 24 hours.

His time keeping was approximate as he just as likely to turn up two hours early as two hours late and saw no difference in either piece of behaviour. If he was ever actually on time there was that grin again as he pointed at his watch as if to say "look how clever I am!".

Neung died on June 3 this year he was 35 but admitted to 30. I was in Bangkok and beyond the reach of the Pattaya Grapevine. I arrived in Pattaya three days later and expected him to turn up as usual. His illness was so sudden and so short that I had no idea anything was wrong. It was only a matter of hours after my arrival that I got the news from a mutual friend.

I last saw him at Christmas when he appeared at my hotel room having evaded the attention of the security guard on the lift. As usual he was grinning at his own cleverness.

He was never my boyfriend but I valued his friendship and it was a privilege to have known him:

I'm going to miss his company and that grin. Farewell my "special" friend.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c156/Jons_photos/Neung_01.jpg

Nivet Seeree (Neung) 1973-2008.

Only the good die young....

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

There is an extraordinary sadness and softness in his eyes in that last photo.

you've brought a tears to my eyes Kun Jon.

So many die so young in Thailand ( yes 35 is young to me !!)

[dave_tf-old]

Can relate to most of those small details. I'm glad you two got to know one another, and sorry to hear of his passing.

That's way to young to go. Very sad.

[piston10]

Poor Neung and poor you, Kun Jon. It's a lovely tribute; and all the more so because it is so wonderfully restrained and allows the photos of Neung to convey to us why you must be in an agony of grieving. Hold and comfort Neung in your heart, so that he may in turn comfort you. He will.

Kun Jon,

I've viewed this board and the pre runners for years and never registered to post but was so sad to here this news and felt it right to post.

Like you I first met Neung about 2002 when he worked in Thai Boys, he was good friends with a Laos lad there who I had a close relationship with for 4 years and he accompanied us many times to Hollywood out on day trips and the like just as a friend of my lad.

You are so right to say he was easy company and fun to be around but not so easy to really know him, I never felt I did get to know him but always thought he was a kind hearted and gentle soul and often saw him take care of the other younger less experienced boys.

The pictures encompass everything about Neung so well, just as I remember him. I hadn't seen him for the last two years or maybe three as don't get to Patty much now.

Such sad news and my thoughts go out to you as obviously you were much closer to him than I ever was but he was something very special both in looks and also as a human being.

There will only ever be "one" Neung

[Smiles]

. . . and yes and yes and yes to what everyone else has written above.

As my guy says: " ... take a good care ... " Khun Jon.

David ....

Kun Jon, a beautfil eulogy. Thank you for sharing.

Kun Jon,

What a beautiful eulogy and photos -- thank you for sharing it with us. It is never easy to lose a friend, but so much more difficult when that friend is so young.

God bless.

[globalwanderer]

Thanks for sharing. I know how difficult it is when you lose a young friend. My thoughts are with you and with his family

Having experienced on too many occasions for my liking during the years I have been living here in Thailand, the same feelings as those which I have no doubt you will be currently experiencing, I can say to you Khun Jon, I know only too well how this type of loss feels. My thoughts are with you and also Neung's family.

Om mani padme hum



George.

A wonderful tribute to a beautiful young man. Well said!

Ralph

Bubbles wrote

>There will only ever be "one" Neung<

I thought that others would probably remember him and thanks for the comments which agree so much with everything I felt about him. Looking at the date of the first photo I have of him which is of the two of us sitting in Thai Boys Boys I see it is November 2002 so we must have met him at around the same time as I don't think he had been there long then.

Thanks also to all others who have offered their kind comments.

Neung's funeral was on June 10 and a group of his friends travelled from Pattaya early in the morning. They invited me to join them but I didn't go. I had met one of his brothers and his sister but had never travelled to his home or met his parents. I was worried about the effect of the sudden arrival, unheralded, of a Farang. It might have been awkward and I didn't want to risk imposing on his families grief. His mother was inconsolable, I was told. I will be holding a small service for him with some friends when I visit again at Christmas.

I saw photos of the funeral with mountains of flowers and his photo all over the place.

Here's one last photo from me which is a favourite:

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c156/Jons_photos/Neung_07.jpg

That face is more eloquent than anything else I can write.

[Aunty]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2wIH4bqbuPo

I never cried the way I cried over you
as I put down the telephone
and the world it carried on.
Somewhere else, someone else is crying too,
another man has lost a friend, I bet he
feels the way I do.

As I watch the sun go down, watching the world fade away,
all the memories of you come rushing back to me.
As I watch the sun go down, watching the world fade away,
all I want to do is kiss you once goodbye. goodbye.

(Jimmy Sommerville, The Communards)

[lonelywombat]

Thank you kun jon for sharing this special moment with us. It makes me feel proud to feel that there are real people out there, with good heart, not cynical,not abusive,not selfish who love and care for boy specials

Please dont change. I am sure you will find someone who deserves you.

[Brad the Impala]

Aunty, one of my favourite songs and singer/songwriters too.

[piston10]

If there's any justice in the order of things (and I recognise there may not be) this creature will one day be Edward-II-ed.

God, I hope I never have to write a posting like this one.

What really brings it home is that my own boyf had a bad car accident this last week. I posted a picture of his step-father in the hospital, and HE took the picture because Mom insisted that he rush up to visit his poor step-dad in the hospital. He had to cut school to obey her, and the next day drove Mom and Pop home, and then hurried back to Chiang Mai -- very tired. (He didn't like missing school.)

As he got nearer to home in Chiang Mai, he went a little too fast on a detour, tried to pass a slow vehicle, suddenly saw another vehicle coming at him, and swerved out of the way. There were big rocks on the detour, and the car rolled.

And the Angel of Death passed him by. He came out completely unscathed -- but almost in a state of shock.

God, I hope I never have to write a posting like this one. God, I hope I never have to write a posting like this one.

Bye bye, Nueng. Very very sorry to see you go! jing jing na khap!

Kun Jon,
I had to read your post carefully a few times but I'm still a bit confused. Is this your HIV+ boyfriend you've been writing about? I get the impression its not.
Only 35 years old - so sad.

Very sad story I posted the story for several of my friends who were equally sad about it. Such a young man and since visiting Thailand for many years I have known so many similar stories. Thank you for posting it all the same and my deepest sympathy for the loss of such a nice young man.

Kun Jon,
I had to read your post carefully a few times but I'm still a bit confused. Is this your HIV+ boyfriend you've been writing about? I get the impression its not.
Only 35 years old - so sad.

Neung's medical history is not mine to share but he was NOT HIV+ and as I wrote in my first post he was never my boyfriend. Both Neung and my boyfriend were happy with the phrase I was careful to use when I described him as my "Special Friend".

Khun Jon, Thank you and sorry.
I actually hate threads like this because by the time I got to the bottom of the page I couldn't see for the tears.
I didn't know him, so why the tears. It just all seems so fuckin tragic; and unnecessary.

Hang in there mate.

As he suffered his own tragedy a little over 12 months ago with his boyfriend being shot dead by some thugs outside The Birdcage ( before it's birth) he would never be so crude as to write such a thing.

Your statement above Lunchtime, is something I am able to agree with you on for the first time in quite a while. No matter what is said, has been said, and no doubt will be said in the future about LMTU, making such a crass remark such as the one he was believed to have made, one made instead by someone who I am not sure anyone knows for sure, who he is, or may have been previously here, is a remark I believe that LMTU would never be guilty of making.


My apologies Khun Jon, for my post deviating somewhat away from Neung. No disrespect meant in any way on my part, for having done so.



George.

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

agreed George..we don't want to divert from Khun Jon's sadness .

Thanks for posting another picture of Neung..you can tell he was a lovely soul.

Anyway he's up there..in that lovely tree in heaven which that TV monk says is better than any paradise we can conceive of on earth !

Perhaps he can give Krazy Pub Peter a quick hello from us !

This topic appears to have been edited, as one particular post has been deleted as well as at least my own quoting it and commenting in a similar vein to others which still remain and consequently no longer make any sense. The point has been made before, but if threads are to make any sense after posts have been deleted then a note to that effect needs to be made - surely putting "deleted post" cannot be that difficult?

(Schumann) Claudio Arrau looks like he knows what he is talking/playing about...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3w1CAjegrw

[Smiles]

Or " ... post deleted because ... ". I don't get the secrecy in moderator actions like this. What's to hide?

Delete a post, for a good reason, and then explain why in a few short words. I just don't understand why the mods can't offer the Board such a simple courtesy. The moderating credibility would rise by leaps and bounds if a procedure like that is followed.

Cheers ...

There was an explanation that this thread had been edited and Rikshaw's posts deleted. It was originally added to a post I made saying that Rikshaw's comments and the quotes from it meant that I would longer be veiwing it or posting.

Following Rikshaw's deletion I removed my post and the notification therefore also disappeared.

Start a new thread if you want to go on about it but please leave this thread alone, that's the simple courtesy I would ask.

..


{ Bob has acted and this "new name" reads as guest - I am closing the tread before another "new name" starts it off again - jinks}

[elephantspike]

This thread doesn't need to be locked. It is not any more likely to attract any posts from malicious "newbies" than any other random thread.

Reopened.

I'm really sorry to hear about your sadness news, Khun Jon....
Begining of this year, I also lose one of my beloved friends ; very young, very attractive and charming boy....

But C'est la Vie !!!!

"No one can avoid seperation"

Suffering caused by seperation from what is beloved and pleasing is intensively painful.
Forcing separation not to happen is impossible.
Everyone has to separate from the beloved ONE DAY............................................... .

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

This tread doesn't need to be locked. It is not any more likely to attract any posts from malicious "newbies" than any other random thread.

Reopened.

so it's been re-treaded !!

I hope the expressions of sympathy are some sort of comfort Khun Jon-even though many of us obviously don't know you.

It does getter better over time though...so many of my friends have passed onto another realm.I now treasure the times we had together and look forward to meeting up with them in the future.

[giggsy]

Old Age, I decided, is a gift

I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always
wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body, the
wrinkles,the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken
aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my father!),
but I don't agonize over those things for long.
I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving
family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more
kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend.
I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my
bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks
so avant garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be
extravagant.
I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they
understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4
AM and sleep until noon?
I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60&70's, and if
I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love .. I will.
I will walk the beach in shorts that are stretched over a bulging
body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite
the pitying glances from the jet set .They, too, will get old.
I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as
well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not
break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when
somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give
us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is
pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.
I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray,
and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my
face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair
could turn silver
As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what
other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned
the right to be wrong.
I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day. (If feel like it)
MAY YOUR FRIENDSHIP AND MEMORIES NEVER COME APART ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART! MAY YOU ALWAYS HAVE A RAINBOW OF SMILES ON YOUR FACE AND IN YOUR HEART FOREVER AND EVER!

A few years ago I called Neung from Hua Hin to tell him I would be arriving in a few days time and arranged a time to meet him in "Wild West Boys" (in its original position).

That evening he called and said "Me waiting". It was still rather early but I assumed he meant me to meet him straight away so I said "OK" and off I went.

I arrived at an empty bar with no sign of Neung. Somewhat irritated I called him and discovered, after some confusion, that what he had meant was that he has started working as a "Waiter" and therefore couldn't meet at the agreed time.

Such are the misunderstandings that can happen when I try my Thai and Thai guys try their English.

I never said in my posts that Neung could also be very funny. He once met two Farang friends of mine. One towered over Neung as he was very tall. The other had a rather ample waist band. Neung could never remember their names but if he wanted to refer to them he would first hold a hand high over his head and then out in front to illustrate their relative height and girth. It was a simple piece of mime but it was done with that grin and a sense of simple fun that was very funny (OK you probably had to be there to appreciate the humour but it's small things I find that often stick in the memory and that image keeps coming back to me).

"Such are the misunderstandings that can happen when I try my Thai and Thai guys try their English".

These are the memories that hold so dear, and always come flooding back to remind us of people we have known and the joy of having known them.

Thank you Jon for sharing with us.

I'm so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful tribute. I'm 35 as well, and your post made me appreciate how fragile life really is and served as a reminder to enjoy and relax. (Really stressed here with work ... but will be back in Thailand in a month.)

Kun Jon, my condolences on your loss. I'm an infrequent poster but I just wanted to tell you that I always enjoyed reading your posts about Neung and his challenges. Even though I didn't know him, I feel as though I do through your efforts. Thank you for being such an inspiration and an example of what friendship is all about. May Neung rest in peace.

Neung is in a better place now. RIP.

[bao-bao]

It's a good reminder of how lucky I am to have made so many friends in Thailand, and how sad I'd be to lose one as you did.

Best wishes from Bangkok (where I am visiting for another few days).

bao-bao

DELETED

Kun Jon, my condolences on your loss. I'm an infrequent poster but I just wanted to tell you that I always enjoyed reading your posts about Neung and his challenges. Even though I didn't know him, I feel as though I do through your efforts. Thank you for being such an inspiration and an example of what friendship is all about. May Neung rest in peace.

Despite Kun Jon's previous post there still appears to be some confusion; Neung was not the subject of his previous extensive posts about his HIV+ boyfriend, whose identity he has always (correctly, I believe) kept private.