January 7th, 2008, 23:32
I got back at the weekend after spending Christmas and the New Year with my boyfriend in Thailand and, for part of the time, in Cambodia.
The Cambodian part of the trip was put into serious doubt when my HIV+ boyfriend became very ill a couple of months ago. The meningitis which has been a continuing problem right from the start flared up again and he ended up in hospital seriously ill and with a plummeting CD4 count.
The main trip to Thailand was never in doubt so I left things as late as I could before deciding on the Cambodian part of the holiday. I got his latest CD4 count two days before I was due to leave the UK and it showed an improvement and the doctor also gave his approval for the trip. The only worrying thing was that after three days on an intravenous drip a few weeks earlier, that was deliberately aimed at getting rid of the meningitis for good, a blood test showed that the bacteria was still present. But he had no symptoms and the doctor put him on a new antibiotic and also made sure he had a supply of all the drugs he might need along with pills in case of stomach upsets and some diet advice (my boyfriend has a gastric ulcer which never heals and has to be careful what he eats).
So I headed off for Bangkok to meet up with my him before flying onto Cambodia the next day. He was at the hotel waiting for me and looked great. If he had lost weight in his most recent illness it didn't show. You have to spend some time with him to see any signs that he is ill. But the signs are there mainly as he copes with side effects of his drugs but he never complains. His stamina has improved but he still tires easily and sleeps at every opportunity (not unique for a Thai). Watching him take all his pills is a humbling experience as there are so many.
As always I tried to find out as much as I could about what pills he's on but they are all Thai generics now but packaged in reused containers. Even if there is a brand name it's not what's actually inside the container. But he has a doctor who really cares about him and he's always had good treatment and I'm satisfied that he's getting what he needs. I don't know of any doctors in the UK who'd call their patients to check how they are.
I found it strangely reassuring to see the hotel bathroom rapidly fill up with all the non-medical potions and lotions that he seems to think are necessary for him to look his best. Three kinds of talcum powder (why?) and creams and ointments for all sorts of things. An industrial sized hairdryer also accompanies him wherever he goes and his hair is constantly being "titivated". I wouldn't have it any other way as it's great to see him well enough to care about how he looks.
So onto Cambodia and a lot of sightseeing. He'd enjoyed Cambodia on a previous trip, before he'd become so ill, but we went in the rainy season and it was much better this time. His favourite thing was a Sound & Light Show at Angkor Wat. It was only on for two months around the New Year. He is incapable of hiding his emotions and if he likes something then you know it. He was grinning from ear to ear and was really excited at the end when we went up on the stage for photos with the cast. The show wasn't exactly to my taste but it was well worth it just to see him so happy.
Eventually he overdid it a bit which I knew he would but he soon recovered after some rest. For most of the time he was his old self which is great to see as he's so much fun to be with when he's feeling OK. He's very funny and very silly and like many Thais has retained a lot of the child about him (he's 32 in April but shows little sign of "growing up").
I had hoped to make some progress in seeing if there was any likelihood of him working again in some capacity but I got nowhere with that. He's never fit enough for long enough for it to be feasible. So a hope for the future if he can keep healthy and shake of the meningitis.
If anyone is thinking of going to Cambodia then I recommend it but I do love temples and archaeology is a hobby so it's bound to suit me. Can't comment on "gay life" etc as I've not investigated at all on either of my visits. My boyfriend was told by one guide that he'd heard of "Gays" but that there weren't any in Cambodia! My boyfriend is fairly "up front" about our relationship and loves introducing me as his boyfriend even in the most prosaic of situations. So when he was haggling over the price of a souvenir in the hotel Gift Shop I heard him say "I ask my boyfriend".
I love that...
I'll be back in June but won't try and organise a foreign trip again as it was too much of a worry as he became ill so near the time we were due to go. I became increasingly concerned that it wasn't wise to take him out of Thailand and beyond the reach of the doctors who know him and his condition. I know he will be disappointed as he wants to go to Hong Kong and Singapore but they will have to wait.
We'll probably end up in Hua Hin again which isn't too far from his home in Ratchaburi.
The Cambodian part of the trip was put into serious doubt when my HIV+ boyfriend became very ill a couple of months ago. The meningitis which has been a continuing problem right from the start flared up again and he ended up in hospital seriously ill and with a plummeting CD4 count.
The main trip to Thailand was never in doubt so I left things as late as I could before deciding on the Cambodian part of the holiday. I got his latest CD4 count two days before I was due to leave the UK and it showed an improvement and the doctor also gave his approval for the trip. The only worrying thing was that after three days on an intravenous drip a few weeks earlier, that was deliberately aimed at getting rid of the meningitis for good, a blood test showed that the bacteria was still present. But he had no symptoms and the doctor put him on a new antibiotic and also made sure he had a supply of all the drugs he might need along with pills in case of stomach upsets and some diet advice (my boyfriend has a gastric ulcer which never heals and has to be careful what he eats).
So I headed off for Bangkok to meet up with my him before flying onto Cambodia the next day. He was at the hotel waiting for me and looked great. If he had lost weight in his most recent illness it didn't show. You have to spend some time with him to see any signs that he is ill. But the signs are there mainly as he copes with side effects of his drugs but he never complains. His stamina has improved but he still tires easily and sleeps at every opportunity (not unique for a Thai). Watching him take all his pills is a humbling experience as there are so many.
As always I tried to find out as much as I could about what pills he's on but they are all Thai generics now but packaged in reused containers. Even if there is a brand name it's not what's actually inside the container. But he has a doctor who really cares about him and he's always had good treatment and I'm satisfied that he's getting what he needs. I don't know of any doctors in the UK who'd call their patients to check how they are.
I found it strangely reassuring to see the hotel bathroom rapidly fill up with all the non-medical potions and lotions that he seems to think are necessary for him to look his best. Three kinds of talcum powder (why?) and creams and ointments for all sorts of things. An industrial sized hairdryer also accompanies him wherever he goes and his hair is constantly being "titivated". I wouldn't have it any other way as it's great to see him well enough to care about how he looks.
So onto Cambodia and a lot of sightseeing. He'd enjoyed Cambodia on a previous trip, before he'd become so ill, but we went in the rainy season and it was much better this time. His favourite thing was a Sound & Light Show at Angkor Wat. It was only on for two months around the New Year. He is incapable of hiding his emotions and if he likes something then you know it. He was grinning from ear to ear and was really excited at the end when we went up on the stage for photos with the cast. The show wasn't exactly to my taste but it was well worth it just to see him so happy.
Eventually he overdid it a bit which I knew he would but he soon recovered after some rest. For most of the time he was his old self which is great to see as he's so much fun to be with when he's feeling OK. He's very funny and very silly and like many Thais has retained a lot of the child about him (he's 32 in April but shows little sign of "growing up").
I had hoped to make some progress in seeing if there was any likelihood of him working again in some capacity but I got nowhere with that. He's never fit enough for long enough for it to be feasible. So a hope for the future if he can keep healthy and shake of the meningitis.
If anyone is thinking of going to Cambodia then I recommend it but I do love temples and archaeology is a hobby so it's bound to suit me. Can't comment on "gay life" etc as I've not investigated at all on either of my visits. My boyfriend was told by one guide that he'd heard of "Gays" but that there weren't any in Cambodia! My boyfriend is fairly "up front" about our relationship and loves introducing me as his boyfriend even in the most prosaic of situations. So when he was haggling over the price of a souvenir in the hotel Gift Shop I heard him say "I ask my boyfriend".
I love that...
I'll be back in June but won't try and organise a foreign trip again as it was too much of a worry as he became ill so near the time we were due to go. I became increasingly concerned that it wasn't wise to take him out of Thailand and beyond the reach of the doctors who know him and his condition. I know he will be disappointed as he wants to go to Hong Kong and Singapore but they will have to wait.
We'll probably end up in Hua Hin again which isn't too far from his home in Ratchaburi.