A serious question for Boygeenyus ... just asking

[Smiles]

If, as you say quite often, you don't go to "bars" (let's go with the western definition), GoGo establishments, discos, whore houses (western or Thai definition), Places-like-Babylon.
And if, as you say, you don't sashay on down to Pattaya for any reason (which would mean never having stepped foot in Sunnee Plaza).
And if, as you haven't said (that I recall) but I may assume, you never go to those types of establishments listed above in Patong or Chiang Mai or Kon Kaen or Nong Khai or Si Saket or Surat Thani, or Buriram or Kanchanaburi or Hua Hin or etc etc etc ... well, you get the picture.

Given all those "ifs" and other implied ones . . . then where do you go to enjoy relaxation or excitement or stimulation or inellectual discourse (even!) within a gay milieu or (even a marginal gay context)?

Being a Thai citizen (impressive I should add), and having been 'on the ground' in Thailand for quite a long time now you have often but vaguely implied that you have a circle of gay Thai friends (upper crust) in which you involve yourself . . . so where do you and your crowd go for an evening out? (Specific place names not necessary of course ... I'm not trying to haunt you, or give rise to a general stampede in the direction of your Places-of-Interest). If you have an area or upcountry town in Thailand where you enjoy going to leave behind the madding crowd, where would that be?

Denigratin' Everybody for Everything on message boards obviously takes up a lot of your leisure time, and that's fair game and I make no bones about it at all. But one assumes there's an actual beating heart in there somewhere and I'd be interested to know those things or places which you conquer on a day off, or a night out in Bangkok or environs.

On the other hand . . . " ... it's none of your fucking business ... " could be considered a reasonable response as well. ( And I'm expecting it :blackeye: )

Cheers ...

Thank you for asking, Smiles.

My group of friends is not so upper-crust. It spans construction workers, former bar boys who are now very successful in legitimate fields, self-made middle class boys, as well as a few truly blue blood old-money upper-crust types. I tend to prefer the company of the ones who have pulled themselves up by their bootstraps and made it on their own. I have a group of my own friends, and my bf has some of his own, but there is a big intersection.

My farang friends (yes, I do have a few!) are mostly journalists, diplomats, and entrepreneurs -- none of whom came here for the sex first and looked for a way to stay second. I guess I feel that people who are so obsessed by sex that it dominates such important decisions as where to live and where to vacation are a little pathetic, mostly unhappy, and mostly pretty uninteresting.

My younger days were spent in soi 4. That's back in the Rome Club era. I also went to Babylon a lot back in those days, well before the move to the present, horrid structure and well before, even, the original cozy premises were doubled in size. I can tell you that that I was quite in demand as a not-bad-looking farang in my early 20's!

Nearly twenty years later, nightlife doesn't interest me so much anymore. I'll go out to eat with friends, perhaps have a drink in a pub like Telephone or Sphinx (or a non-gay place like the Sky Bar at State Tower) once in a while, see movies, etc. I go down to Khaosarn Road and pretend I'm a backpacker again every now and then, explore Chinatown back-alleys, and otherwise enjoy this great city.

I go to a sauna every couple of weeks or so, but only the locally-oriented ones where I'm less likely to run into that awful clique of aging, farang-chasing Thai boys that hang out at Babylon (some of them have been a fixture for going on 20 years). I travel a lot on business, so I more and more value the time I get to spend at home, or hanging out at friends' homes.

The go-go bar scene enters into the picture only rarely, if I'm entertaining a visitor who absolutely has to see it, or if I'm with a group that decides to go on a lark. I'm bored out of my skull after five minutes, and thoughts of offing any of the boys -- if any -- are fleeting. Pattaya? Perhaps once or twice a year for a weekend, just to get away. I usually stay at Tui's or the Rabbit Resort and don't venture very far from the beach.

Although the strict disciplinarian Col. Hovelturd will call me a hypocrite, I do admit to enjoying a massage at one of the gay massage places every now and then. Once a month, maybe? Am I not allowed one, infrequent guilty pleasure? I am only human, you know.

[bao-bao]

boygeenyus, before the expected onslaught of vicious additions to this thread let me say I appreciated your thoughtful reply to the question Smiles put to you here. I understand where you're coming from a little better now, and take you at your word on what you shared, no questions asked. It's a side of you SGT's not used to seeing, and it's a nice side. If you applied the same thought to other threads it would add value to not only your replies, but the board as a whole.

I also don't agree with the sex tourist mentality - any more than I do with the Ugly American (farang) mentality - but I don't condemn them for it and I certainly don't judge them. That's for other powers to do, spiritually speaking. If I see the thread is about something I don't agree with, I can just leave it alone or ignore it and read another... as could you (nudge, nudge).

I've often read your short, curt (and let's be honest - that's being kind) additions to threads and thought to myself "why doesn't he just ignore this instead of putting the boot in almost every time?" It's understood you're a "posting freak", but maybe it isn't necessary to make a snide or hurtful comment to every threadline you don't agree with. It just starts fights that derail them (and are annoying to many) and might scare away newbies with interesting ideas and things to share with the board - just my two satang.

Thanks again for taking the time to post the reply.

I agree with most of what bao-bao says above about boygeenyus' thoughtful and enlightening response to Smiles' question. But, unlike bao-bao, I have no problem at all with the majority of BG's short, curt "zingers" that constitute the bulk of his contributions here. In fact, they are one of the reasons I enjoy reading this board; they add a dose of reality; although sharp, they are often devastatingly funny and usually well-deserved; and they help keep the other silly queens here from running amok. Much like a Moderator.

[Smiles]

" ... But, unlike bao-bao, I have no problem at all with the majority of BG's short, curt "zingers" that constitute the bulk of his contributions here. In fact, they are one of the reasons I enjoy reading this board; they add a dose of reality; although sharp, they are often devastatingly funny and usually well-deserved; and they help keep the other silly queens here from running amok ... "
My thoughts exactly.

But the "zingers" ~ by themselves & in the presence of nothing but 'same same' ~ give rise to feelings of being unhappily confronted with a relentless one-dimensionality. I never really believed that, but was hoping that Boygeenyus would help out with exposing "other" sides. He hardly ever did ... disappointing, but not unusual in the message board milieu.

The response to the question above has been quite heartening . . . gives one encouragement that life as a retired dude in Thailand (which hopefully I shall be next year) has numerous aspects which are NOT necessarily tied to the inbred world of a large number of beach-umbrella-queens and gogo-haunting ex-pats in Pattaya & Jomtien.

If any of you think I am shocked at Boygeenyus's open-heart response, then think again: I am hardly surprised at it, and am most happy to receive it.

__________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ __________________________


As for Sky Bar @ State Tower ( http://www.blissism.com/weblogpix/trip0 ... bar/37.htm (http://www.blissism.com/weblogpix/trip0304/thailand/sky_bar/37.htm) ) ... sounds (and looks!) like an interesting imbibing adventure. I'm awful with heights (my balls attempt a slow crawl up towards my stomach when looking over an apartment balcony) but persevere with some coaxing or ridicule. We'll try this place for sure:


THE OVERHANGING SKY BAR ( That's the bar, not a hot tub :blackeye: )


http://www.photodump.com/direct/sawatdee/sky_bar_view.jpg



Cheers ...

[TrongpaiExpat]

Thank you Boygeenyus for that thoughtful reply. And, thank you Smiles for bringing the BoyG out of attack and denigrate mode--for once?

You even got him to admit he goes to Pattaya, well Jomtiem anyway.

I have been to Pattaya on short trips 5 times this year and my excuse is I have two long time friends that live there and they will not come to Bangkok. Both are sexpats and slowly drinking their way into oblivion. I don't agree with their lifestyle choices(if it is a choise) but I don't judge them. They are not going to change.

Thank you for asking, Smiles.

.

And thanks for responding BG. A most informative and intelligently written post.

It is heartening to know that there is someone else here in Bangkok whose life is not dictated by the bars and clubs and actually enjoys living in this most amazing of cities and enjoying its perpetual diversities.

I was starting to think there was something wrong with me for living what now turns out to be a lifestyle similar to your own.

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

if they don't have a Thai parent ?. Is that what we are talking about here ?. Can you get citizenship or just permanent residency ?

Personally I've never met some one who is "obessesed with sex" or anyone who actually chose to live somewhere because of sex but that doesn't mean they don't exist. I'd wouldn't think it was any of my business actually.

I'd disagree though that sex doesn't have a lot to do with decisions people make. I reckon it's one of the driving forces and I'd say the opposite. Someone who isn't interested in sex and pretends it's not one of the most dominont forces in their life is having themselves on. Kingdoms and empires have fallen for the love of a woman or a boy. Wars have been fought because of love.

Pompous British politicians have waffled on about piety and family life and then found to have a mistress or a rent-boy on the side or a leather and amyl nitrate fetish while all French polticians have a mistress without question. The latest American elections were dominated by scandals of a Republican's dalliances with page boys via saucy emails. You should read the biography of the British pop mogul who chose all the pretty boy pop stars in the 1950"s and 1960"s only because he fancied them and made them into stars, or the high flying New York Mafia lawyer who makes every artist sleep with him before they sign with his record company , male or female, and that includes the still most current successful female recording star in history ( with a religous name). No I think sexual obsession can make people a bit interesting actually.

All you can do is talk from your own perspective, like me !! :cheers:

[Brad the Impala]

My younger days were spent in soi 4. That's back in the Rome Club era.

Nearly twenty years later, nightlife doesn't interest me so much anymore.

I seem to remember the existence of Rome Club being more than thirty years ago! Is your memory deceiving you, or did Rome have a longer life than I realised? Like you, I moved to Bangkok in my early twenties, but I have switched back and forth between Thailand and other countries since.

It was definitely still here in the early '90s.

[Dodger]

Boygeenyus quote:


I guess I feel that people who are so obsessed by sex that it dominates such important decisions as where to live and where to vacation are a little pathetic, mostly unhappy, and mostly pretty uninteresting.

Sounds like a clear definition of all married people if you ask me.

Thanks Boygeenyus for being positive (for once) and for speaking to us like a normal person, I know that was a challenge.

Personally, my compulsion for sex (tossing in a little romance), especially with good looking young Thai boys, is exactly what dominates my decisions, e.g., where I take my vacations, the way I spend my money, where I want to live one day, etc., and I couldn't be happier.

If I had my choice (as I often do) to sit with an older (upper crusted) bunch of professional farangs, or the Thai middle-class - versus - sharing the company of a cute half naked farm boy from Isaan...I'll take the farm boy every time. I get plenty of intellectual stimulation when I'm at work - when I come to LOS, I'm interested in stimulating my other body parts.

mai pen rai

[Jetsam]

I get plenty of intellectual stimulation when I'm at work - when I come to LOS, I'm interested in stimulating my other body parts.



yes me too, nothing bether for the biceps and triceps than an hour in the boyz sauna gym.

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

]"Quote:[/b]
I guess I feel that people who are so obsessed by sex that it dominates such important decisions as where to live and where to vacation are a little pathetic, mostly unhappy, and mostly pretty uninteresting.

Sounds like a clear definition of all married people if you ask me."

I know a few hetro married couples and lately some gay married couples and none of them fit that role. Mind you , I can't vouch for their sex life ( shudder shudder I don't want to know :idea: ) but it's seem to me financial considerations that that have dictated where they live and one gay "married" couple have finally made it Thailand to retire but that's so they can live a much better lifestyle than they could ever live in gloomy old England.

Maybe someone should do a proper survey as to why gay or hetero farangs travel to Asian countries and see what draws them ie : sex, food. cheap prices as hotels etc, beaches..etc

[Smiles]

" ... Maybe someone should do a proper survey as to why gay or hetero farangs travel to Asian countries and see what draws them ie : sex, food. cheap prices as hotels etc, beaches..etc ... "
My (non-survey) guess would be ~ at least for gay farangs ~ that most are first drawn to Thailand because they are at heart Rice Queens ... i.e. their primary emotional and sexual desires lie in the smooth, non-hirsuite, younger-than-themselves, Asian, brown-eyed, handsome, lithe, graceful, sexy, gay-friendly (reputation!) men of Thailand and various neighbouring countries.
For myself, I've had had a medium-long relationship with a Japanese guy (a major cracker!), and a long-term live-together relationship with a N. American Indian (whom I thought was 'vaguely' Filipino when we first met!). Simply put ... I'm primarily attracted to Asian guys (or guys who "look" Asian), and I doubt whether the large majority on this Board are not also drifting happliy in that same junk.

Once they get to Thailand (or environs) they find themselves in a land of desire and possibility which may well have been rather beyond their imagination (or their fantasies) when they planned their first trip. After that they were hooked. And 'gettin' hooked' is why they come back.
It's only after that initial interaction that they may ~ if they're lucky ~ start genuinely loving Thailand for reasons other than just "The Boys"

Cheers ...

[allieb]

A friend of mine asked me to go to Thailand with him in on various occasions and my answer was always,"you must be kidding, not even if you paid my fare". I work in a country which is wall to wall Filipino workers everywhere you go I have never really been attracted to them or the other Asian nationalities working here. I took my holidays in various countries around the world and sex was the last thing on my mind as I was used to having 8 to 10 encounters during the working week with Black Arabs.

In 2002 I gave in when my friend actually produced a free ticket for me to go with him to Bangkok. I fell in love with the place on sight. The Thai boys which I had always previously categorized in my mind as like Filipino rice were nothing like I imagined. They are different from all the rest of Asians Thailand is unique as are the Thai people.

I have been back to Thailand 10 times since my first trip. I honestly have no more interest in the abundance of free sex available here in The Middle East and just long to get back to Thailand at every opportunity. In short I have become a rice queen sex tourist. I guess like some people try drugs for the first time and get hooked. I have gotten myself hooked on Thailand and its boys and I'm not looking for a cure.

[Lunchtime O'Booze]

but I get hooked on the place as a whole concept ( whatever that is ).

I certainly like the people and everything about them-the good and the bad.

But is there any advantage to becoming a citizen ?

Free drink for 2 at Sky Bar !

If you stay at Le Bua for 2 nights, (5,700 baht a night).

You also get :-

daily breakfast for 2
one lunch for 2
softdrinks from minibar
high speed internet access
suite with a view (room on 51-59th floor)

This is a special HSBC package from wotif http://www.wotif.com/hotel/View?hotel=3 ... e=weekends (http://www.wotif.com/hotel/View?hotel=39646&page=1&viewType=weekends)

Le Bue & the State Tower website : http://www.lebua.com

http://www.lebua.com/img/inside3_25.jpg

" ... Maybe s Simply put ... I'm primarily attracted to Asian guys (or guys who "[i]look" Asian), and I doubt whether the large majority on this Board are not also drifting happliy in that same junk.
Cheers ...

Hmm no Boyarse, is not acting like a married couple. I am single and do much the same he does when I am in Bangkok, as for the rest of Thailand, I dont bother with Pattaya and have a somewhat more Catholic taste in adventure.

Its Interesting to hear Smiles in Canada saying what he just said, but I think it is a little different for some who actually live in Asia like myself, we are just too ready to leap outta the Junk at any given opportunity, even if its just to wank in front of the mirror or even better on top of it.

When I go to Europe or America or Africa for that matter, I am blown over by all the good looking men, and hardly miss Asia in this respect at all. And then when I am back in Asia I miss em a lot. It could be cultural.
For me Thailand is especially good because I always miss the Thai, but I cant say that about Asia in general. Thailand for me is somewhat more rosy than for your average expat living there. Though I am addicted to the people and I might add the good service and the Thai way of making you feel very special and honoured. So far I have not been able to imitate that very successfully in my own dealings with people. The Thai wai soon looks pretentious and confused outside Thailand and I suppose I just have never had to realy serve anyone. On a direct place for place comparison, I tend to get an erection as often walking down a street in Muscat as I do in Bangkok. I admire a bit of hungry lean hairy as much as a smooth sticky, all be it mostly just fantasy and the odd bit of exploration. I definitely prefer men older than myself, hairy or not, but find hairless legs suspicious to say the least.

I wonder how actually living there affects all that. I do see aged queens, some in a bad state of health and mind in Bangkok but not that many, usually when I go for a massage, but almost never west of the Chao Praya were I stay and play when in Bangkok. I wonder how long it all lasts before they are lusting for a western take on things?