Acceptance of Gays in Thai Society

[Sen Yai]

The assumption, I believe, both at home and abroad, is that homosexuality in Thailand is largely a non-issue. But how accurate is this claim for a country renowned for being Asia's most enlightened with regard to homosexuality? .............But for me the most important question of all is whether Thai society can accept homosexuality as an individual sexual preference, just as heterosexuality is, with full respect and rights, and no taboos attached. ...................To really answer whether Thais can accept homosexuality just as it is, perhaps we need to consider if we can forego useless and outdated stereotypes and see people for who they are. There may be a natural urge to slot any person we come across into a certain sexual category, but is it anyone's fault if you can't immediately tell his or her sexuality? Matt Naparat
Interesting article in today's Bangkok Post (http://www.bangkokpost.com/Perspective/10Sep2006_pers005.php)

The article doesn't really deliver any conclusion, but it's interesting that writer believes there is still some way to go.

[manfarang-old]

Thank you for the link, Sen Yai. A very interesting article. I've always felt that the assertions that Thailand is some sort of "gay paradise" were way overblown. Homosexuality is often tolerated, but I've never believed that it was really accepted as just a variation of human sexuality. As the article points out, virtually all gay characters in Thai media are played for low-brow laughs. Gay farang are probably more accepted because they have money and the enhanced status that goes with it. The average gay Thai usually doesn't have that advantage.

For most Thais i would say its a case of - whatever - who cares.

I`ve been to friends villages many times and nobody batted an eyelid and we didn`t try to hide anything. Of course we slept in same bed. Mother & father showed me off at every opportunity.

I`ve also been to schools with mom, dad & the whole family for shows, parents day etc and they start the ladyboy dressing up thing at a very early age. Every boy seems to want to dress up and wear make up. ( big turn off for me)

Maybe their attitude is that if it doesnt harm anyone just let it be?

[bao-bao]

My first thought is based solely on how my Thai friends view it, and that is (for the most part) live and let live or mai pen rai... for everyone except themselves.

When it comes to them personally, all to a man say they don't want anyone to know, especially family and God Forbid co-workers. This includes Thai men from various societal levels (computer technicians, doctors, military officers, food vendors, office workers, travel agents, software salesmen and one student-now-moneyboy). The more prominent they perceive their job to be - i.e. the lieutenant - the less likely they are to risk being seen at somewhere as innocuous as Sphinx for fear of people "thinking" about them.

However, I have rarely run into homophobia in LOS anywhere near a s nasty as it is here in the good ol' US of A.

Come to think of it, people in LOS are overall nicer than folks here on ALL levels. I'm not so much depressed at having to leave LOS itself as I am about having to come back here and face the parade of A-holes that begins before I even get out of the parking garage after being picked up at the airport!!

Attitudes vary quite a lot between areas, classes and races. Muslim and Chinese Thais are quite hostile, Southern Thais and middle/upper class Thais are less tolerant, working class Northerners and, especially, Isan people are almost entirely open about people's sexuality.

Come to think of it, people in LOS are overall nicer than folks here on ALL levels. I'm not so much depressed at having to leave LOS itself as I am about having to come back here and face the parade of A-holes that begins before I even get out of the parking garage after being picked up at the airport!!

Ain't that the truth

My spouse and I (we were "married" in San Fran in 2004) have been together 13 years now. We share a home together in the country, and a townhouse in the city. We had quite a house warming (13 monks) when the house was built, and are regulars at the local temple. Frankly, I can't imagine being any more integrated as a Gay person into general society than I am here.
That said, the goverment doesn't look at it the same way, does it? See, can't even get to this website from Thailand (I'm usting Torpark - do a Google search). There is no Gay marriage here. On the other hand, there wasn't STRAIGHT marriage here until 1932, and there is no Buddhist "marriage" rite at all.

Mostly I see a difference in attitude as I socialize at different income levels, from the politico-military crowd (of which many are quite famous boy lovers) in which a pretense at hiding does take place, to the Thai-Chinese crowd, in which the whole get-married-have-kids-and-then-go-find-your-bf thing takes place, to the business crowd, in which some of the foreigners have very tight assholes (especially the Aussies) but most of the Thais are cool, to the Village People (no, not the singing group), who couldn't care less as long as you are happy, not hurting anyway, and freely participate in village life.

I can't imagine us being in rural America on a farm and not getting the crap beat out of us, our house burned down, and otherwise shunned or abused.

No, I'll take my Thai life anyday - I turn 50 this year so I'll change from my business visa to a retirement visa, and hopefully live happily ever after ... until the rules change again, I suppose.

It is a shame, too. Can't get my spouse a resident visa for the USA, so we can't live together there. Looks like long term, they won't want white faces in Thailand anyway, so we probably won't be able to stay here. We're working on both getting passports to a third country, and hope to have that process completed in a few years. Even if we get them, we're going to stay here as long as we can, because the PEOPLE accept us. Unfortunately, the gov't does not.