JayToff
November 23rd, 2020, 20:45
Dancing with the Devil in the City of Angels: A Fifth Anniversary Tribute to Bangkokbois
The affection bar boys have for their farang are undoubtedly an extension of their general good will and feelings toward their buffalo back home. Like the buffalo, many of Pattaya’s sexpats have big feet and walk with slow plodding steps. And the bellowing and snorting noises a buffalo makes is not all that different from the strange sounds made by sexpats too. Both tend to have oversized bellies, enjoy spending the day wallowing in and near water, and both, to a Thai, are seen as being stupid and often stubborn. Throw in the fact that sexpats too can be trained to provide a living for the boy’s entire family and you can easily see why bar boys are so happy to add another daft animal to their extended family.
Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Water Buffalo* (But Were Afraid To Ask)
Bangkokbois, 15th January, 2013
Today marks five years since Rush’s death put a permanent end to his popular and much-missed Bangkokbois blog. Other blogs on Thailand and its earthly pleasure there have been and are, but Bangkokbois was one of a kind, not just for its insight into the world of the Bangkok bars and the bar boys, but for the waspish wit and humour with which those tales were told.
For the newbie, there is still no better guide to Bangkok, the bar boy world and to the magic of Thailand itself. For veterans of that world, seeing your own human experience – lust, the bumbling search for love and the gradual acceptance of things as they are because “this is Thailand”- explicated with sympathy, wit and humour, sometimes of the acidic kind, almost always brought a smile to one’s face. It was that blend of sarcasm and sympathy that gave Bangkokbois its unique flavour.
At its heart though, Bangkokbois was a love story, the story of Rush’s love for Thailand, the Thai people and for Noom, known to his readers around the world as “my bar boy friend and the current love of my life”, which he chronicled in the many posts tagged “I Fell In Love With a Bar Boy”. It was that love that gave Rush the remarkable insight which made the blog what it was. A healthy dose of sarcasm runs through the blog too, but beneath it was always an appealing sympathy for his subjects.
Five years after the final post, Bangkokbois still remains the single best guide to the Bangkok bars and the world of the bar boys. His step-by-step guide on how to handle yourself on a first visit to a go-go bar was both spot-on and hilariously funny. Soi Twilight, the setting for many of these tales, is no more; but the old bars continue their neon-lit existence in the new Twilight Zone across the road in Patpong, many of them still inhabited by the same characters who provided the supporting cast to some his most memorable posts. Those hoping to lose their bar cherry or take a walk down memory lane will find that guide below.
First timers guide: https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2011/02/26/first-timers-guide-to-bangkok-gay-gogo-bars/
Never one to shy away from the stuff that readers are really interested in, he also offered good advice on paying for boys, what to pay and, mostly importantly, what exactly it is that you are paying for (that post is also an interesting study in relative inflation; good luck trying to find those prices in Bangkok and Phuket today!) While the price for a night of bliss may have changed, what remains the same is the underlying dynamic. Understanding how that boy you are drooling over approaches these encounters can make the difference between a night to remember and a complete dud. His posts on the subject also offer a fond look back at the “up to you” days, or nights. Pick of the post:
The range of tips is always going to be higher in Bangkok. With Phuket coming in close behind (Phuket for some reason doesn’t seem to know it is in Thailand and prices on everything are more in line of what you’d pay in Europe.) Then Chiang Mai, and the lowest range runs in Pattaya. For good reason. Lots of available guys, and Pattaya draws an even mix of cheap touri and even cheaper expats.
And that remains as true today as it was in 2011.
https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2011/02/25/how-much-is-that-puppy-in-the-window-the-cost-of-a-night-with-a-gogo-boy-in-thailand/
These subtle differences in the way the boys approach these encounters is just one more reason to stick with the Thai boys, rather than moneyboys from neighbouring countries who have now colonised much of the bar scene
Tourists to Thailand, however, are not always the most subtle bunch. Rush, therefore, included a brilliant glossary of the words and phrases that every traveller to Thailand should familiarise themselves with, aptly entitled Tinglish For Sex Tourists (AKA Shit Pattaya Sexpats Say To Each Other). The new visitor to this forum is equally advised to study it if he wants to make sense of the conversations here.
https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2014/03/28/tinglish-for-sex-tourists-aka-shit-pattaya-sexpats-say-to-each-other/
Beyond dealing with the things that any potential sex tourist would want to know, he was often kind enough to include the things that he knew they would want to know if only they knew they didn’t know them. The blog, therefore, also contains useful information on the Thai water buffalo, the kwaai, which is not to be confused with kuai, which is vulgar slang for penis. While the majority of readers are probably here for the latter rather than the former, you will no doubt come to appreciate having a little background information on the beast that your new Thai boyfriend may soon be asking you to pay for: https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2013/01/15/everything-you-always-wanted-to-know-about-water-buffalo-but-were-afraid-to-ask/
The blog was about a lot more than bars and boys though, often taking us down the road less travelled, literally; for Bangkokbois included a good deal of travel writing and much of it was very good. His post on The Top Ten Bangkok Experiences: Part 5 – Doing Nothing, Accomplishing Lots, for example, lays out a wonderful alternative for a day of exploring in Bangkok that avoids all the usual tourist traps while leading you through some of its genuine highlights. You can read that here:
https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2013/07/02/the-top-ten-bangkok-experiences-part-5-doing-nothing-accomplishing-lots/
It wasn’t just the wit, the insight and the genuinely useful information that made Bangkokbois so popular, though; it was also the eye candy - tonnes and tonnes of it – mostly Thai, but with the occasional young farang adding a bit of diversity. The best pictures on the blog, though, were not always of the naked boys or bar scenes, for the chap was an intrepid photographer and was not entirely bereft of talent. The term “monk shot” soon became familiar to his regular readers. So too was the warning against attempting to tiddle them.
Reading back through his work, one realises how much Rush grew as a writer over the course of the blog. If his earlier work was useful, interesting and humorous, his later work was often pure gold and comic genius; albeit almost always gold daubed with acid.
What made Rush’s work so compelling was its immediacy. He was at his best when writing in the first person of the things that he was up to, which went well beyond the bar scene. Unlike the jaded sexpats who start multiple threads on the fora while saying exactly the same thing over and over again in all seasons, Rush’s posts almost always had something unique and worthwhile to say.
His forays into fiction under the “The Boys in the Bar” heading on his blog however, were somewhat less amusing. The exception to this was when he was being a sarcastic git – and a sarcastic git he proudly was. We speak no ill of the dead in celebrating that which he celebrated himself. Winding people up was one of his great pleasures and he proudly proclaimed as much. His thread, A First Timer’s Visit To Gay Pattaya, imagining a first-time visit to Pattaya by a fictional, aging farang, was both savage and humorous. Re-reading it when preparing this tribute brought guffaws of laughter as hard as when I first read it years ago, but I will save that link for another time.
A great deal more could be said, of course; but for those already familiar with Bangkokbois, no more needs to be said and for those who have yet to discover it, so much greater will the pleasure be in uncovering its gems for yourself.
Sawatdee Network is to be praised for continuing to host the Bangkokbois blog, but its failure to, in any way, promote awareness of its existence, even through something as simple as a link or banner, is tragic. Not only are new readers and new visitors to Thailand being deprived of that most valuable of guides, but Sawatdee is being deprived of valuable traffic to this site, so critical for search-result rankings and the commercial prospects for the site. With memories of Bangkokbois now fading, it will be a sad day indeed if the current or future owners of this site ever decide to pull the plug on hosting it.
Part romance, part comedy, alas the final chapter of Bangkokbois was revealed to be a tragedy. With Rush’s death the tale was cut short and the quill dipped in ink and blood laid down for the last time. Indeed, the little soi of neon-lit fantasies of which he was the main chronicler has also now ceased to exist; and yet the worth and value of the blog remain, with still more than enough to keep one entertained and educated, whether one is a first time reader or an old fan returning to an old favourite.
So, on this, the fifth anniversary of Rush’s death, I offer this small tribute to “Rush”, to Bangkokbois and to its entire cast that kept us dancing along with the Devil in the City of Angels.
The affection bar boys have for their farang are undoubtedly an extension of their general good will and feelings toward their buffalo back home. Like the buffalo, many of Pattaya’s sexpats have big feet and walk with slow plodding steps. And the bellowing and snorting noises a buffalo makes is not all that different from the strange sounds made by sexpats too. Both tend to have oversized bellies, enjoy spending the day wallowing in and near water, and both, to a Thai, are seen as being stupid and often stubborn. Throw in the fact that sexpats too can be trained to provide a living for the boy’s entire family and you can easily see why bar boys are so happy to add another daft animal to their extended family.
Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Water Buffalo* (But Were Afraid To Ask)
Bangkokbois, 15th January, 2013
Today marks five years since Rush’s death put a permanent end to his popular and much-missed Bangkokbois blog. Other blogs on Thailand and its earthly pleasure there have been and are, but Bangkokbois was one of a kind, not just for its insight into the world of the Bangkok bars and the bar boys, but for the waspish wit and humour with which those tales were told.
For the newbie, there is still no better guide to Bangkok, the bar boy world and to the magic of Thailand itself. For veterans of that world, seeing your own human experience – lust, the bumbling search for love and the gradual acceptance of things as they are because “this is Thailand”- explicated with sympathy, wit and humour, sometimes of the acidic kind, almost always brought a smile to one’s face. It was that blend of sarcasm and sympathy that gave Bangkokbois its unique flavour.
At its heart though, Bangkokbois was a love story, the story of Rush’s love for Thailand, the Thai people and for Noom, known to his readers around the world as “my bar boy friend and the current love of my life”, which he chronicled in the many posts tagged “I Fell In Love With a Bar Boy”. It was that love that gave Rush the remarkable insight which made the blog what it was. A healthy dose of sarcasm runs through the blog too, but beneath it was always an appealing sympathy for his subjects.
Five years after the final post, Bangkokbois still remains the single best guide to the Bangkok bars and the world of the bar boys. His step-by-step guide on how to handle yourself on a first visit to a go-go bar was both spot-on and hilariously funny. Soi Twilight, the setting for many of these tales, is no more; but the old bars continue their neon-lit existence in the new Twilight Zone across the road in Patpong, many of them still inhabited by the same characters who provided the supporting cast to some his most memorable posts. Those hoping to lose their bar cherry or take a walk down memory lane will find that guide below.
First timers guide: https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2011/02/26/first-timers-guide-to-bangkok-gay-gogo-bars/
Never one to shy away from the stuff that readers are really interested in, he also offered good advice on paying for boys, what to pay and, mostly importantly, what exactly it is that you are paying for (that post is also an interesting study in relative inflation; good luck trying to find those prices in Bangkok and Phuket today!) While the price for a night of bliss may have changed, what remains the same is the underlying dynamic. Understanding how that boy you are drooling over approaches these encounters can make the difference between a night to remember and a complete dud. His posts on the subject also offer a fond look back at the “up to you” days, or nights. Pick of the post:
The range of tips is always going to be higher in Bangkok. With Phuket coming in close behind (Phuket for some reason doesn’t seem to know it is in Thailand and prices on everything are more in line of what you’d pay in Europe.) Then Chiang Mai, and the lowest range runs in Pattaya. For good reason. Lots of available guys, and Pattaya draws an even mix of cheap touri and even cheaper expats.
And that remains as true today as it was in 2011.
https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2011/02/25/how-much-is-that-puppy-in-the-window-the-cost-of-a-night-with-a-gogo-boy-in-thailand/
These subtle differences in the way the boys approach these encounters is just one more reason to stick with the Thai boys, rather than moneyboys from neighbouring countries who have now colonised much of the bar scene
Tourists to Thailand, however, are not always the most subtle bunch. Rush, therefore, included a brilliant glossary of the words and phrases that every traveller to Thailand should familiarise themselves with, aptly entitled Tinglish For Sex Tourists (AKA Shit Pattaya Sexpats Say To Each Other). The new visitor to this forum is equally advised to study it if he wants to make sense of the conversations here.
https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2014/03/28/tinglish-for-sex-tourists-aka-shit-pattaya-sexpats-say-to-each-other/
Beyond dealing with the things that any potential sex tourist would want to know, he was often kind enough to include the things that he knew they would want to know if only they knew they didn’t know them. The blog, therefore, also contains useful information on the Thai water buffalo, the kwaai, which is not to be confused with kuai, which is vulgar slang for penis. While the majority of readers are probably here for the latter rather than the former, you will no doubt come to appreciate having a little background information on the beast that your new Thai boyfriend may soon be asking you to pay for: https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2013/01/15/everything-you-always-wanted-to-know-about-water-buffalo-but-were-afraid-to-ask/
The blog was about a lot more than bars and boys though, often taking us down the road less travelled, literally; for Bangkokbois included a good deal of travel writing and much of it was very good. His post on The Top Ten Bangkok Experiences: Part 5 – Doing Nothing, Accomplishing Lots, for example, lays out a wonderful alternative for a day of exploring in Bangkok that avoids all the usual tourist traps while leading you through some of its genuine highlights. You can read that here:
https://bangkokbois.sawatdeenetwork.com/2013/07/02/the-top-ten-bangkok-experiences-part-5-doing-nothing-accomplishing-lots/
It wasn’t just the wit, the insight and the genuinely useful information that made Bangkokbois so popular, though; it was also the eye candy - tonnes and tonnes of it – mostly Thai, but with the occasional young farang adding a bit of diversity. The best pictures on the blog, though, were not always of the naked boys or bar scenes, for the chap was an intrepid photographer and was not entirely bereft of talent. The term “monk shot” soon became familiar to his regular readers. So too was the warning against attempting to tiddle them.
Reading back through his work, one realises how much Rush grew as a writer over the course of the blog. If his earlier work was useful, interesting and humorous, his later work was often pure gold and comic genius; albeit almost always gold daubed with acid.
What made Rush’s work so compelling was its immediacy. He was at his best when writing in the first person of the things that he was up to, which went well beyond the bar scene. Unlike the jaded sexpats who start multiple threads on the fora while saying exactly the same thing over and over again in all seasons, Rush’s posts almost always had something unique and worthwhile to say.
His forays into fiction under the “The Boys in the Bar” heading on his blog however, were somewhat less amusing. The exception to this was when he was being a sarcastic git – and a sarcastic git he proudly was. We speak no ill of the dead in celebrating that which he celebrated himself. Winding people up was one of his great pleasures and he proudly proclaimed as much. His thread, A First Timer’s Visit To Gay Pattaya, imagining a first-time visit to Pattaya by a fictional, aging farang, was both savage and humorous. Re-reading it when preparing this tribute brought guffaws of laughter as hard as when I first read it years ago, but I will save that link for another time.
A great deal more could be said, of course; but for those already familiar with Bangkokbois, no more needs to be said and for those who have yet to discover it, so much greater will the pleasure be in uncovering its gems for yourself.
Sawatdee Network is to be praised for continuing to host the Bangkokbois blog, but its failure to, in any way, promote awareness of its existence, even through something as simple as a link or banner, is tragic. Not only are new readers and new visitors to Thailand being deprived of that most valuable of guides, but Sawatdee is being deprived of valuable traffic to this site, so critical for search-result rankings and the commercial prospects for the site. With memories of Bangkokbois now fading, it will be a sad day indeed if the current or future owners of this site ever decide to pull the plug on hosting it.
Part romance, part comedy, alas the final chapter of Bangkokbois was revealed to be a tragedy. With Rush’s death the tale was cut short and the quill dipped in ink and blood laid down for the last time. Indeed, the little soi of neon-lit fantasies of which he was the main chronicler has also now ceased to exist; and yet the worth and value of the blog remain, with still more than enough to keep one entertained and educated, whether one is a first time reader or an old fan returning to an old favourite.
So, on this, the fifth anniversary of Rush’s death, I offer this small tribute to “Rush”, to Bangkokbois and to its entire cast that kept us dancing along with the Devil in the City of Angels.