Whoops and it just slipped all the way in Doctor, honestly!

[Brad the Impala]

PRACHUAB KHIRI KHAN: From this peninsular province comes a cautionary tale about the perils of leaving bottles standing on the floor.

Nuy (not his real name) had just finished his ablutions when he slipped on the wet floor of his bathroom and plonked down firmly on his backside.

This is the kind of embarrassment many of us suffer from time to time, but in K. NuyтАЩs case there was an added indignity.

At precisely the spot where he landed was a bottle of (ironically) stomach medicine. It did not break, but slid in its entirety into the poor fellowтАЩs back passage.

Unable to extract the bottle, and in considerable pain (the bottle measured 23 centimeters long by 7.5cm in diameter) he was taken by relatives to the main Prachuap Khiri Khan Hospital.

An X-ray confirmed that he did indeed have a large bottle-shaped object lodged in his large intestine, close to the main exit.

It required a surgical procedure under full anesthetic to extract the foreign object, but K. Nuy is now well on the way to recovery.


phuketgazette.net/queernews/index.asp?id=4764 (http://phuketgazette.net/queernews/index.asp?id=4764)

[Dodger]

23 centimeters long by 7.5cm in diameter

...and no Astro Glide???

Hmmm. Sounds kinda like teenagers telling their parents that the "hickies" on their necks are from hitting a doorknob.

If it is true, the science of the event would be worthy of examination: he landed with such force and such focus to thrust the bottle completely past the sphincter (with no lubrication, as pointed out by Dodger) in one fell swoop. That is power and precision! I wonder if it just smoothly glided in, or if there were tearing of tissue? The mind boggles. And snickers.

[American Teacher-old]

Reminds me of similar themed stories concerning the male genitalia and swimming pool bubblers. "Honestly, it just got stuck!"

-Chris

WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT

Case 1. A 39-year-old married white male lawyer presented with a self- inserted perfume bottle in his rectum that he was unable to remove using various objects, including a back scratcher. He had inserted this bottle on previous occasions. Edema of the rectum and sigmoid colon precluded the successful manual removal of the object in the emergency room. A pelvic x-ray film (Fig.1) showed the object to be lodged 12 cm proximal to the dentate line. The 3 by 17 cm object, "Impulse Body Spray," was removed manually after a spinal anesthetic. The patient was discharged on the second postoperative day. He refused psychologic counseling.

Case 2. A 39-year-old white male was admitted to the University Hospital psychiatric service for evaluation of a 2-week history of bloody diarrhea and auditory hallucinations. Rectal examination revealed a foreign body approximately 3 cm above the anal verge. An x- ray film (Fig. 2) showed that it was 20 cm in length. The object could not be removed by manual or endoscopic means. The patient consented to extraction of the dildo under general anesthetic. Biopsy specimens of the hemorrhagic rectal mucosa were performed and were negative on Ziehl-Neelson stains for mycobacterial or cryptosporidium infection. The patient was discharged without complications the following day.

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y9/Silom/RECTAL.jpg

Miss Marple just phoned to ask what Khun Nuy's bottle of stomach medicine was doing on the floor to begin with.

"Impulse Body Spray," ..cheap and nasty..if it was Yves St Laurent's Opium you could at least say the man had style !!

I will never look at a bottle of IMPULSE in the same way again after this. :scratch:

"Impulse Body Spray," ..cheap and nasty..if it was Yves St Laurent's Opium you could at least say the man had style !!
Pearl, darling, he was a *lawyer*....need we say more?

A cute, eighteen-year-old Latino* man was brought to the E.R., standing in the flat-bed of a pee-cup truck. with a recorder: the flute variety, lodged...there.
He claimed he was playing it, in the bathroom, while he waited for the tub to fill; slipped on the damp floor and...Whoops!
I sent him a lovely get-well card signed, "Don't take up the oboe! An admirer."

*I only mention that because I adore cute, young Latinos, especially those who play the flute!

Another man was such a frequent visitor to the E.R. he qualified for miles! We nick-named him, 'Sweet Potato.'
He graduated to grapefruit--and matriculated in honeydew!

He claimed, on any given Saturday night; there were enough fruits and vegetables wandering around the Gold Coast to start a produce market! They didn't use the hanky code--But you could tell them by their Chiquita buttons! :bootyshake:

Surely you remember a mini... that little austin/morris.... well... this young lady gave the driving seat to her boy friend and in the moment of his getting in and and she crossing over to the passenger seat she sort of slipped and was, after a manner of speaking, raped by the gear stick. The car was an automatic and in gear but had no sun roof. They managed to drive to the hospital and crash cut the engine with the gear in drive still. Eventually it was the firebrigade with appropriate curtaining who cut out the roof and released her under the directions of a senior gaenocologist who, together, with the firemen did not laugh until they got home.

[quote="Silom"]WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT

Case 1. A 39-year-old married white male lawyer presented with a self- inserted perfume bottle in his rectum

Case 2. A 39-year-old white male was admitted to the University Hospital psychiatric service for evaluation of a 2-week history of bloody diarrhea and auditory hallucinations.



Hmm - I turn 39 at the end of this year - should I start looking for things to lose in my rectum? I didn't know it was de riguer at that age! If I were a bottom this might be a more exciting prospect...

A lawyer friend once told me of a case he read in a journal in which a man was suing his landlord because he "slipped" in the shower and "inadvertently" impaled himself on the handle of a plunger! I'd have to say that anal splinter removal should definitely qualify for "pain and suffering"

I suppose it would have been worse if he had used Drain-O - caustic chemicals and all....

Butch's new bf wanted to top him but butch had never been topped before.
Afraid he'd lose him; Butch asked Ginger for advice.
Ginger told him to practice.
"How!" wailed Butch.
Oh, for Christ's sake! With a hot dog!" snitted Ginger.
To make a long story short, the hot dog broke off--Because Butch boiled it. "Well it was frozen...etc."
Happily, everything came out all right in the end.
He passed it the next day.
Even the bun and pickles. :pottytrain4:

Okay, I'm joking!

About the pickles:

It was relish.