How to not get hustled at Gogo bars?

[extronaut]

Have had this experience a couple of times. Once was during my only trip to Pattaya, back in 14. And the second time was during my recent visit to Bangkok.

I visited Fresh Boys a couple of times on the latter trip. On the first night I picked up a number who was just fantastic. I honestly considered matrimony. I took his phone details and caught up with him again before I left Bangkok.

However my second visit to FB, I got this Cambodian guy who was all smiles, hugs and kisses in the bar. But after I got him back to my hotel, he didn't want to even look at me. He practically admitted that he just wanted me to stick it in his hole, and quickly ejaculate, so he could back to the bar.

I said to him: "Do you want to leave?" And he replied "yes". So I started throwing my cloths on and said "Okay let's leave."

I only intended to pay him 200thb, because I figured the kisses and cuddles he gave me at the bar were worth about that much. To do that I had to go to the front desk and ask them to break a 1000 note for me. I think it turned out to be a good plan, because I suspect he was reluctant to make too much of a scene in a public place.

He did beg for more though, so I gave him an extra 100, which he ungratefully snatched from my hand before darting off. In retrospect, I really shouldn't have been so generous.

My question: is there any way I can stop this happening again? Or at least, minimise the danger of it?

After paying for the over priced drinks and the bar fine at FB, I forked out an exorbitant amount of money for practically nothing. The experience has me wondering if I ever want to do it again, to be frank.

[snotface]

My question: is there any way I can stop this happening again? Or at least, minimise the danger of it?.

Given the fact that this is commercial sex we are talking about, nope. Intuition is your best defense against picking a dud, but it's far from infallible. Be grateful that a few offs, against all the odds, turn out to be 'just fantastic' and many more enjoyable enough and far better than most of us could hope for in our home countries. A few total washouts here and there seems a small price to pay overall, though I agree that when it happens it can feel like being alone in an arctic waste.

[neddy3]

snotface, you've put it so well.

[Oliver2]

A lot can change on the walk from the bar to the hotel.

[neddy3]

In Pattaya one time, I offed a boy from a go-go bar despite intuition telling me that this may well be an error.
I'm usually more cautious.

Well, it was an error. Back in the room, after a drink, he did not want to take his clothes off and it was obvious that he was horrified by the thought of what might happen.
So, 200 baht and piss off was my solution.

It leaves a nasty taste though, and after thinking about it for a while, I decided to go back to the bar.
I complained that he was useless, and was given my off fee back without much reluctance.

That is one way to let the bar know that a boy did not perform at all well.
In a well run bar (?), if it happened a few times, the boy would be out.

On subsequent visits to the bar, this boy and I managed not to notice each others' presence.

Despite the fact that I look like any go-go boy's nightmare, the overall majority try to give a decent effort,
for which I am always grateful.

[Manforallseasons]

Despite the fact that I look like any go-go boy's nightmare, the overall majority try to give a decent effort,for which I am always grateful.

At least you are being honest with yourself.

[arsenal]

This is more likely to happen with boys from Cambodia, Laos and Vietnam. My multi platinum Pulitzer prize winning international best selling gay desperado bible "The Perfect Off" is the best one can do to get what you want.

The perfect off. First published May 9th 2016.

So many times I read about offs not living up to expectations. Here is a simple plan to ensure success.
1) Tell the boy what you are hoping for before you off him. Make it clear what you want.
2) If he says he doesn't............then don't pressure him either in the bar or the room.
3) Tell him how much you will tip him.
4) Unless you've stipulated he must come (see 1) then don't demand it and don't insult him if he doesn't. (I know for a fact many do.)
5) Do invite him to have a drink from the mini bar. He is your guest. (My rule is NO alcohol, not even beer if they're on a motorbike.)
6) Pay him nicely. Thank him for his time and assuming you've enjoyed your time with him tell him.
7) Give him a nice kiss goodbye, even if you drop him of right outside his bar. Gay or straight assuming you've followed the above rules he won't mind a bit.
8) Next time you go into the bar, if you don't off him again then give him 20/40 baht. It's nothing to you and shows you thought he was a good off. It also buys him dinner.

However if the boy is a 'bait boy' and simply out to con the customers then nothing will prevent that.

[extronaut]

I complained that he was useless, and was given my off fee back without much reluctance.

That is one way to let the bar know that a boy did not perform at all well.
In a well run bar (?), if it happened a few times, the boy would be out.

Surely, there's not much of a basis for complaint in my example though? After all, the guy was willing to give me sex. He just wasn't very enthusiastic about it, and wasn't very nice (in dramatic contrast to his attitude at the bar).

[extronaut]

* scrub "wasn't very enthusiastic". Substitute "majorly unenthusiastic".

[Dalewood]

In all these years, I have only had to deal with total non-performance twice. Once, I gave the boy his marching orders, paid him nothing, and he did not complain. The other time was at the old Twilight Bar. I went back the next night and complained; to my surprise, the Scrooges who ran the place let me pick another boy for no extra money.

[neddy3]

Wow, well done.
I found those 'ladies' rather scary!

[goji]

My question: is there any way I can stop this happening again? Or at least, minimise the danger of it?
I also think you were a little generous if he did nothing in the hotel.
I keep 100, 500 & 1000 notes in the room safe to cover all eventualities for tipping.

How to prevent it happening again (not foolproof):

1 Ask what he likes to do. "Do you like kissing ?" "Do you like sucking ?" etc Watch his replies. If he's hesitant, try to find another boy. Also, beware of him pretending to not understand you.
Most speak enough English to sell their services, although there are a few who genuinely do not. A bit of judgement is needed.

2 Explain what he needs to do to get his tip. "No fuck, no tip" "Must kiss a lot to get tip" etc. Make sure he agrees. Stick to this.

For the other side of the equation, I also try & keep myself as clean as possible.

[Jellybean]

. . . For the other side of the equation, I also try & keep myself as clean as possible.

As clean as possible you say goji. When in Thailand I could not possibly get any cleaner.


I shower in the morning.
I shower before going out at night.
I shower before hopping into bed with my chosen bar-boy
And I shower yet again after our ‘encounter’

Is it possible to be too clean? Not in Thailand! ;)

[cdnmatt]

I always find this kind of attitude a bit callous. Sure, I had a couple duds back in my Pattaya days. I remember one guy, really sweet guy, cute as hell, and in the bar at least seemed quite ambitious to go with me. Got back to the hotel room though, he laid on the bed, grabbed the remote control, and began watching TV with no desire to move, do anything, get undressed, have a shower, nothing. I guess he laid on my stomach for a couple minutes while we tried to talk, but that was about it. He wasn't even interested in getting his dick sucked, let alone anything else.

The few times that happened to me, I always ended up feeling empathetic towards the guy. He obviously doesn't like his work, nor the position life has thrust him into, but he doesn't have a huge choice simply due to where he was born mainly. In those cases, I'd just tip normally to help out my fellow human in a rough spot a bit, send him on his way, and wish him a good night.

I definitely wouldn't get all pissed off about it, then go running off to the bar to bitch to the mamasan / pimp that my prostitute didn't live up to my expections, and I demand my $10 off fee back. Jesus....

[christianpfc]

Have had this experience a couple of times. Once was during my only trip to Pattaya, back in 14. And the second time was during my recent visit to Bangkok.

My question: is there any way I can stop this happening again? Or at least, minimise the danger of it?

After paying for the over priced drinks and the bar fine at FB, I forked out an exorbitant amount of money for practically nothing. The experience has me wondering if I ever want to do it again, to be frank.
What is your ratio of good offs to bad offs? (For me, about 5:1.)

With time, my ratio improved considerably. Your report somehow reminds me of an encounter in 2011 that I described here:
https://sawatdeenetwork.com/v4/showthread.php?12235-Lowest-tip-ever&highlight=lowest
I think 200 THB is appropriate in your case.

I consider the drink price general entertainment (On average, I have 5 drinks in 5 different bars before I off a boy), and the off fee is not that much.

Rarely does a boy switch on the TV, but playing on phone is a problem, I don't like it.

[frequent]

As clean as possible you say goji. When in Thailand I could not possibly get any cleaner.


I shower in the morning.
I shower before going out at night.
I shower before hopping into bed with my chosen bar-boy
And I shower yet again after our ‘encounter’

Is it possible to be too clean? Not in Thailand! ;)A post that gives a whole new dimension to the term “anal”

[extronaut]

What is your ratio of good offs to bad offs? (For me, about 5:1.)


That's a very good question. I really haven't been keeping a score, but at a guess, I'd also have to say that my ratio would be about 5:1.

But among that 5, I'd have to include encounters where the sex has been satisfactory, but nothing to write home about. There's also been cases where, while the off is perfect, and the sex has been totally fantastic, I've had other problems as a result. e.g, I've had 2-3 cases where the boy has stalked me, tried to get his hooks into me, despite me declaring in advance that I'm not interested in any kind of relationship. Seems to happen to me more in Vietnam, for some reason (I really think tenacity is a culturally trait there).

[joe552]

The only dud I remember was last year. I was going to a morlam with a couple of members here. We went to a bar to find me a companion. We had a good time at the morlam and we went back to my room. He said he didn't want to have sex. Disappointed. I gave him 500Bt and he left. I was annoyed for a while. But it rarely happens.

[goji]

As clean as possible you say goji. When in Thailand I could not possibly get any cleaner.


I shower in the morning.
I shower before going out at night.
I shower before hopping into bed with my chosen bar-boy
And I shower yet again after our ‘encounter’

Is it possible to be too clean? Not in Thailand! ;)

Same here, being careful to wash everywhere.
Although I have noticed a few years ago, almost all the boys headed straight for the shower on arrival, but nowadays, perhaps up to a third of them seem quite happy to jump into bed on arrival.

Also, a good swill of minimum 1 minute with some good quality mouthwash is essential. Since a small proportion of the boys will use a vast quantity of mouthwash, rather than leaving it in the mouth, I tend to leave a small but sufficient quantity of it on the sink & hide the litre bottle away.

[Jellybean]

Same here, being careful to wash everywhere.
Although I have noticed a few years ago, almost all the boys headed straight for the shower on arrival, but nowadays, perhaps up to a third of them seem quite happy to jump into bed on arrival.

Also, a good swill of minimum 1 minute with some good quality mouthwash is essential. Since a small proportion of the boys will use a vast quantity of mouthwash, rather than leaving it in the mouth, I tend to leave a small but sufficient quantity of it on the sink & hide the litre bottle away.

At the risk of annoying frequent, what I omitted from my previous list is visiting massage parlours. Late afternoon is my preferred time and I always shower before setting off. And, of course, once there, customers always shower prior to getting down to business and shower once again after the main event. I would definitely say I am at my cleanest while in Thailand. :)

Now, back in my hotel or an apartment, I have never known a Thai or other Asian boy not want to shower prior to shenanigans. However, when I owned an apartment in Bangkok, which had two bathrooms, I would always suggest my visitor use the guest bathroom while I used my en-suite bathroom. To the best of my knowledge, no boy ever refused.

My guest bathroom had most things the boy would need such as soap, shampoo, shower gel and mouthwash. In addition, I kept a small supply of new, packaged toothbrushes in the event that the boy asked for one.

If you haven’t already bought them goji, I recommend buying mini-bottles of mouthwash, which can be bought at any 7-ELEVEN or FamilyMart. They are very handy and I always carry one bottle in my rucksack in Thailand and here in the UK. I also carry a bottle on the airplane for in-flight freshening up. They really are so handy that I brought several empty bottles back to the UK, which I topped up with mouthwash and placed in my bathrooms.

8992

[goji]

If you haven’t already bought them goji, I recommend buying mini-bottles of mouthwash, which can be bought at any 7-ELEVEN or FamilyMart.
I have one or two of them out and they just get refilled from the large bottle.

[arsenal]

Certainly a lot of drama some of you seem to experience with your offs. Flooded bathrooms, vats of filched mouthwash and even a stow away in the bathroom.

All part of the fun I suppose.

[frequent]

I have one or two of them out and they just get refilled from the large bottle.I'm beginning to wonder if there's a market for a Listerine enema

[christianpfc]

As clean as possible you say goji. When in Thailand I could not possibly get any cleaner.


I shower in the morning.
I shower before going out at night.
I shower before hopping into bed with my chosen bar-boy
And I shower yet again after our ‘encounter’

Is it possible to be too clean? Not in Thailand! ;)
My regime is a bit simpler. When in Thailand, I shower once per day and before and after sex, and if I'm particularly lucky I can combine these.

"shower before sex" is a wide field. I shower before I go to bars, so when I come back with a boy, we can jump to bed immediately (I assume he is clean, but if he wants to shower, he is free to do so). The issue here is skin temperature and humidity. After the boy showers, I lose time blotting him dry and waiting for him to warm up.


Since a small proportion of the boys will use a vast quantity of mouthwash, rather than leaving it in the mouth, I tend to leave a small but sufficient quantity of it on the sink & hide the litre bottle away.
I too have a small bottle of mouthwash on my bathroom sink.

But the real issue is waste of toilet paper. To wipe off body fluids during or after intercourse, boys would wrap large amounts of toilet paper/tissue around their hand, to be used for one wiping. I often have to take the toilet paper roll out of their hands to do cleaning up myself, because I reach the same level of cleanliness with 1/10th of the amount of tissue.

[Brad the Impala]

.

But the real issue is waste of toilet paper. To wipe off body fluids during or after intercourse, boys would wrap large amounts of toilet paper/tissue around their hand, to be used for one wiping. I often have to take the toilet paper roll out of their hands to do cleaning up myself, because I reach the same level of cleanliness with 1/10th of the amount of tissue.

"Kitchen Towel" is much better than toilet paper being both more absorbent, and it doesn't remain in little tufts attached to your cock!

[colmx]

"Kitchen Towel" is much better than toilet paper being both more absorbent, and it doesn't remain in little tufts attached to your cock!

but it blocks the toilet a lot more easily! May as well tell us to use tampons!

[Dimsumbear]

Just my luck my success ratio is also 5:1, but the other way round

[sglad]

The few times that happened to me, I always ended up feeling empathetic towards the guy. He obviously doesn't like his work, nor the position life has thrust him into, but he doesn't have a huge choice simply due to where he was born mainly.

Or, just as obviously, he simply wasn't into you.

[sglad]

but it blocks the toilet a lot more easily! May as well tell us to use tampons!

That would be like preaching to the choir.

[latintopxxx]

sglad..wasnt into him...really...clearly it was a renumeration issue