The Pirate Bay Cafe

[arsenal]

The Pirate Bay is a cafe located at the entrance to Dongtan Beach. They do a lovely English breakfast. Bacon, frankfurters, fried potatoes with onion and mushrooms, two eggs, grilled tomatoes, beans, toast, butter, jam and a choice of drinks. All for 185 baht and served with a view of the swaying palm trees and glistening blue waters of the Gulf of Siam.

[Wolzek]

Sounds nice. But for that price many places offer an all-you-can-eat buffet breakfast.

[Smiles]

Sorry Arsenal but that sticky plate makes me gag. Tomatoes are a proper touch though.

[Manforallseasons]

I had my first full English breakfast on a trip to London.....it was huge.....great sausages.....nice bacon.....but why beans in tomato sauce? (Nasty)

[Blacktouch]

I had my first full English breakfast on a trip to London.....it was huge.....great sausages.....nice bacon.....but why beans in tomato sauce? (Nasty)

That is part of any English breakfast. Beans in tomato sauce. We call it baked beans.

[dinagam]

I can already hear the flatulence.

[arsenal]

Again, thanks Dinagram. Here comes creepy pervy you-know-who.

[Manforallseasons]

That is part of any English breakfast. Beans in tomato sauce. We call it baked beans.

They are just beans in tomato sauce........these are real baked beans and are delicious.

[a447]

It's not something I would ever consider eating.

But to each his own.

[Manforallseasons]

It's not something I would ever consider eating.

But to each his own.

After reading many of your trip reports I am sure you’ve had worse things in your mouth.

[arsenal]

They also have genuine HP Sauce. Which I love.

[sglad]

After reading many of your trip reports I am sure you’ve had worse things in your mouth.

Yes, but he likes those "things" because they have been flavoured with cunt juice.

[sglad]

Sorry Arsenal but that sticky plate makes me gag. Tomatoes are a proper touch though.

Agreed, Smiles. Why do farangs eat so much in Thailand? I mean they're in a hot tropical country yet they're still eating like they're living in a temperate climate. These heavy English breakfasts may be suited for a cold day after which they're off to the mines or construction site to burn it off but where does the average Pattaya farang burn it off? I mean their greatest exertion over the entire day is lifting a thousand Baht note from their wallets to give their hoe du jour. And we haven't added in the booze and ciggies yet.

These farangs will whine, bitch and complain about costly health insurance, poor healthcare facilities in Third World Thailand, blah blah blah when they've done their best to choke up those arteries in the last sixty or seventy years. Whatever happened to clear soups, greens and fresh fruit which are available in abundance in Thailand?

[sglad]

I had my first full English breakfast on a trip to London.....it was huge.....great sausages.....nice bacon.....but why beans in tomato sauce? (Nasty)

The beans in tomato sauce are added in on purpose to give a fem touch to the butch bacon and sausages to upset you.:rolleyes:

[Up2U]

Pirate Bay's owner also operates Big Kahuna(on Thappraya Rd opposite vt5) and they share many of the same menu items including breakfast.

[francois]

. These heavy English breakfasts may be suited for a cold day after which they're off to the mines or construction site to burn it off but where does the average Pattaya farang burn it off?


Curiously, most of the Brits I know are all thin. Not so true of the other farangs.

[arsenal]

A big breakfast can mean that you don't actually eat much else for the rest of the day. Thus, plenty of time to burn off the calories.

[DoubleDutch]

Curiously, most of the Brits I know are all thin. Not so true of the other farangs.

Yep, Brits I know here are all slim, and few Americans also slim and fit, contrary to stereotype.

Russian guys over, lets say, 30, all fat! Why is that under 30 Russians are naturally fit, with muscles, often without going to gym, but then something happens, and they balloon up. They often walk around Beach Rd and other places without shirt, often in Speedos. But the fit Russians always have s shirt on, very unfair! At least they like football shorts, that is nice of them, some wear what they think are swimming trunks, but are actually boxer shorts underwear. Maybe Moses can shed some light on this?

Indians are another mystery breed, there tons and tons of them here, all fat. Every single one, I swear! And they all look around 30, maybe between 25 and 45. All overweight, not just little bit. And very few younger Indian guys you meet here are very fit, lets say under 25, maybe even younger. Something happens to Indians after 25. All Indian women fat as well, but who cares.

[dinagam]

I believe that selective breeding over the millennia has brought about the disproportionate body fat distribution seen amongst Indians. This is a common manifestation in vegetarian communities. Cattle and other ruminating ungulates have disproportionately huge stomach. Having a full breakfast and skipping lunch is a good habit. It allows one to pursue other interesting activities during the day.

[DoubleDutch]

I believe that selective breeding over the millennia has brought about the disproportionate body fat distribution seen amongst Indians. This is a common manifestation in vegetarian communities .. Cattle and other ruminating ungulates..




Ruminating ungulates? How do you know these terms?

"A ruminant is any even-toed, hooved mammal (order Artiodactyla) that digests its food in two steps, first by softening it within the animal's first stomach, known as the rumen, then regurgitating the semi-digested mass, now known as cud, and chewing it again."

Disgusting habit!

I thought maybe is massive amount of carbs that Indian food is. It's very "foody" culture, lot of a day revolves around eating, eating unhealthy carb rich crap.

But that does not explain why same thing happens to Arab guys, until 25 they so good looking, naturally, and at 30 every single one is fat. Also very food loving culture, they love sitting around, stuffing food in. But Arab food is often meats, kebab without all the "garlic sauce", what is really flavoured mayo, is very lean meal, clean chicken, some veggies and very little bread. But when you observe them in their natural habitat, the kebab place on corner of Second Rd and Pattaya Tai, South Rd, they add the garlic sauce to every bite, they take the plastic bottle of mayo, and put as much as physically possible on the half eaten kebab, before taking a bite. It is no longer chicken, they basically eat half a liter of mayo in one sitting, no wonder they are barely able to sit on taburettes, wisely made of Aluminium in that kebab place, normally in Thailand you only see those things made out of plastic, of course plastic would simply crumble under their weight.

Another thing, they are probably all married, marriage makes men fat, I have observed that with my married friends, only very few stay fit. There is no longer need to be attractive, in shape, they are out of the game, no reason to make an effort.

[gerefan2]

These heavy English breakfasts may be suited for a cold day after which they're off to the mines or construction site to burn it off but where does the average Pattaya farang burn it off? I mean their greatest exertion over the entire day is lifting a thousand Baht note from their wallets to give their hoe du jour. And we haven't added in the booze and ciggies yet.

?

Your knowledge of how we Brits survive is truly astounding !

[sglad]

Your knowledge of how we Brits survive is truly astounding !

Not really. In fact I was generalising. I know that there are Brits who eat healthily and these heavy breakfasts are often more associated with the working classes who do more manual type work and where they might be exposed to the elements. Jamie Oliver used to be very popular here and all the aunties think he's very cute. I remember having to watch his school canteen series in the mid 2000s as part of one class or other. Nigella Lawson and Gordon Ramsay appeal to more niche groups. Through (English) lit and film studies (Billy Elliott, Full Monty, Trainspotting, etc) I was also exposed to a lot of British cultural norms (historical and contemporary). Last year I was trying very hard to place Fountainhall because he reminded me of somebody and it finally occurred to me that he was the spitting image of Mrs Bucket both in size and pomposity. Of course there are thousands of Brit and other farangs working in my country in various sectors and you do get to know them socially. Just last week I took my grandma for a check up at our local hospital and one of the pharmacists was a young-ish British woman. My grandma was trying to explain to her that she was born during British Malaya and sang God Save the King as a little girl but I don't think the pharmacist understood her - many of these farangs are quite thick and have very little general knowledge outside of the world they grew up in. But you know what? She said my grandma's knowledge of history was truly astounding!

[lonelywombat]

She said my grandma's knowledge of history was truly astounding!
You must have aged somewhat since your first post.

[christianpfc]

Russian guys over, lets say, 30, all fat! Why is that under 30 Russians are naturally fit, with muscles, often without going to gym, but then something happens, and they balloon up. ...

Indians are another mystery breed, there tons and tons of them here, all fat. Every single one, I swear! And they all look around 30, maybe between 25 and 45. All overweight, not just little bit. And very few younger Indian guys you meet here are very fit, lets say under 25, maybe even younger. Something happens to Indians after 25. All Indian women fat as well, but who cares.

Something changes in the body around age 30. Some around-or-over-30-year-olds look good, but when I touch them there is a feeling that I can only describe as "the flesh is not firm". Has nothing to do with body shape. As my sexual attraction lies in the 18-25 years age range, I rarely get these "the flesh is not firm", but I clearly remember two cases: a 28 (?) year old mixed Burmese-Chinese, and a 41 (!!!) year old Thai. The Thai appears in the show in Macho Sauna, and I touched him many times, and while by looks I would date him, once I touch the attraction is gone.

[Oliver2]

Cooked breakfasts died out in the UK forty years ago. The only time we eat them is in hotels.

[gerefan2]

Cooked breakfasts died out in the UK forty years ago. The only time we eat them is in hotels.

And Airports, cafes, bars, railway stations, work canteens....

[Marsilius]

Cooked breakfasts died out in the UK forty years ago. The only time we eat them is in hotels.

A bit of a generalisation there! On Sunday mornings, when there is plenty of time to do so, I often cook a full English breakfast. Mind you, with so many pots and pans on the go, the kitchen looks like a war zone afterwards.

[Nirish guy]

A bit of a generalisation there! On Sunday mornings, when there is plenty of time to do so, I often cook a full English breakfast. Mind you, with so many pots and pans on the go, the kitchen looks like a war zone afterwards.

??? Then I fear you may be cooking it incorrectly ?

SO, a bit like the lightbulb question - so, how many "pots and pans' does it take to make a good cooked breakfast !? The answer surely is "just one" - and that's simply one frying pan !

Surely that's half the point of a "fry" ( or a grill if you're trying to be half healthy I guess but that sort of defeats the purpose in my book assuming you're not eating a cooked breakfast every morning.

So, surely, everything goes into one pan, easy, simple and quick - and ok you "might" pop stuff on to a dish and pop that in to the oven just to keep some ingredients warm while other stuff is cooking but if you're good you can knock it all together in one go.

Well that is unless I've been doing it wrong all these years......mind you according to Oliver as it's apparently been 40 years since I last had to bother ( last Sunday actually) maybe it's not all my fault after all that I forget :-) But hey let's face it Novelle cuisine it is not - and nor is it meant to be. Viva la (Ulster) Fry - beans discretionary as to your politics ( i.e English or Irish and whether or not you like beans basically ! Being from N.ireland the answer for me should be "no beans" - but screw that, I sold out my birthright years ago and am now a "just a few ( a lot) on the side of the plate please" kinda guy !

85388539

[arsenal]

Yes. I agree, it's a one pan number so whatever Marsilius is doing it isn't correct or efficient.

Sausages and black pudding first, then the bacon and all three to the side of the pan. Potatoes and tomatoes next, they don't take long and again, to the side of the pan. Heat it up a bit and cook the mushrooms then move them to the side of the pan. A little more oil and in go the two fried eggs with loads of freshly ground black pepper. The beans go in the microwave and the toast goes in anytime. Presto. A full English in about 20 minutes.

Or get on your motorbike and go to Deli Diner or The Pirate Bay if in Pattaya.

[gerefan2]

Or get on your motorbike and go to Deli Diner or The Pirate Bay if in Pattaya.

Nope, Deli has been shut since I got here a few weeks ago......

[arsenal]

That's not true Gerefan. I had both breakfast and dinner there last week. It's closed on Mondays.

[gerefan2]

Oops , I went there several times...perhaps they were all Monday’s.
Days here are like a wank...all the same!

[sglad]

Yes. I agree, it's a one pan number so whatever Marsilius is doing it isn't correct or efficient.

Sausages and black pudding first, then the bacon and all three to the side of the pan. Potatoes and tomatoes next, they don't take long and again, to the side of the pan. Heat it up a bit and cook the mushrooms then move them to the side of the pan. A little more oil and in go the two fried eggs with loads of freshly ground black pepper. The beans go in the microwave and the toast goes in anytime. Presto. A full English in about 20 minutes.

So everything, even the tomatoes, is fried? Yuck!

[Marsilius]

You must be eating tiny quanties of each element if you can get them all into one pan! Frying pan 1: 4 rashers of bacon. Frying pan 2: 2 eggs. Frying pan 3: 3 rounds of black pudding. Saucepan: baked beans. Air fryer: sausages. [Air fryer used for sausages because fat doesn't spit everywhere and because it's supposedly a healthy way to cook - but then, if I were really concerned with health, would I be eating all that stuff anyway?]

[Nirish guy]

- but then, if I were really concerned with health, would I be eating all that stuff anyway?]

You sort of answered your own question there .......and you'll note I did say that a small dish popped in the oven to keep things warm whilst other things cook is a good idea sometimes....... :)