Cream Teas in Pattaya.

[arsenal]

Two of our most highly regarded members (both of whom have been the subject of multiple transfer bids from other gay boards such is the sparkle, hilarity and relevance of their posts) have piqued my interest on another forum. As an English gentleman abroad I have never had the pleasure of a cream tea in Pattaya. I was wondering where someone of taste and refinement such as myself might go. Any recommendations?

[frequent]

Two of our most highly regarded members (both of whom have been the subject of multiple transfer bids from other gay boards such is the sparkle, hilarity and relevance of their posts) have piqued my interest on another forum. As an Engliish gentleman abroad I have never had the pleasure of a cream tea in Pattaya. I was wondering where someone of taste and refinement such as myself might go. Any recommendations?Since you may be Engliish (sic), are almost certainly a broad but definitely not a gentleman I'm not sure how anyone can assist

[arsenal]

And please everyone. Make sure the strawberry jam is homemade and the cream from pure bred Jersey cows before posting any suggestions. I'm not looking to slum it. Many thanks.

[frequent]

I'm not looking to slum it.Why break the habit of a lifetime?

[arsenal]

My preferred beverage is of course, Earl Grey but a fine English breakfast tea also works well and would be acceptable.

[cdnmatt]

Learn how to make your own. It can't be that difficult.

I make my own everything these days. Sauces, seasonings, bread, buns, salad dressing, everything.

[frequent]

That's what servants are for, Matt

[scottish-guy]

..I was wondering where someone ..such as myself might go.

Yes - but the good taste for which I am noted, prohibits me from telling you.

[Andaman!]

Arsenal - follow the instructions below for a cream tea in Pattaya:

1) Visit Pastry Addiction on Pattaya Beach Road and purchase scones
2) Find nearest 7/11and pick up a jar of strawberry jam
3) Take scones and jam to Good Boys bar in Sunee Plaza and find seat at rear of bar behind screen
4) Cut each scone in half and smear liberally with strawberry jam
5) Dependent on how much cream you prefer on your scone, wave 300 baht each in front of various members of staff
6) Staff will accept 300 baht and unzip their flies to display substantial penises, often from the north east Isaan region.
7j Provide manual or oral assistance to each participant until they unload a fresh load of cream onto the scone. Repeat as necessary.
8) Enjoy your Pattaya cream tea

[dinagam]

And don't forget your Earl Grey tea bags...

[arsenal]

A fine sandwich selection to include but not limited to smoked salmon (Scottish of course) off the bone ham and tomato, cheddar and pickle and it goes without saying egg mayonnaise with cucumber. Served naturally on a silver doilied platter is a must.

[frequent]

... egg mayonnaise with cucumber ..."The traditional cucumber sandwich is composed of paper-thin slices of cucumber placed between two thin slices of crustless, lightly buttered white bread" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cucumber_sandwich

Egg mayonnaise is definitely not part of the English traditional cucumber sandwich - but then I didn't expect arsenal would know that

[frequent]

And don't forget your Earl Grey tea bags...Tea bags!!! How de trop

[Jellybean]

Arsenal - follow the instructions below for a cream tea in Pattaya:

1) Visit Pastry Addiction on Pattaya Beach Road and purchase scones
2) Find nearest 7/11and pick up a jar of strawberry jam
3) Take scones and jam to Good Boys bar in Sunee Plaza and find seat at rear of bar behind screen
4) Cut each scone in half and smear liberally with strawberry jam
5) Dependent on how much cream you prefer on your scone, wave 300 baht each in front of various members of staff
6) Staff will accept 300 baht and unzip their flies to display substantial penises, often from the north east Isaan region.
7j Provide manual or oral assistance to each participant until they unload a fresh load of cream onto the scone. Repeat as necessary.
8) Enjoy your Pattaya cream tea

Ah-ha! I wondered how long it would be before an imaginative member posted an alternative version of the Pattaya cream tea. And what a well drafted post it was, if I may say so, Andaman.

But arsenal asked for a recommendation that did not entail him slumming, and a visit to Good Boys Bar is, in anyone’s lexicon, most definitely, slumming.

When I lived in Hua Hin I used to visit the Dusit Thani on a regular basis for afternoon tea with a female fa-ràng friend and a hi-so female Thai acquaintance. Both ladies enjoyed the sweet things in life and they always ordered a truly scrumptious selection of pastries, which included scones with clotted cream and strawberry jam. Mmmmm . . .

I had forgotten about those delightful, heavenly afternoons without a care in the world, apart from my expanding waistline, until your topic jogged my memory.

If you do not wish to slum it, arsenal, may I suggest you try the Dusit Thani Pattaya, or any other four or five star hotel.

Earl Grey tea is not a tea that suits my palate, arsenal. My current particular favourite is Her Majesty’s Blend, a tea which, interestingly, was introduced to me by a member of this forum with unparalleled knowledge of the finer things in life.

;)

[scottish-guy]

Afternoon Tea is not a Cream Tea ( Francois will be along shortly to chastise you for straying off-topic)

A Cream Tea consists solely of Tea, Scones, Jam, and ....well, cream (clotted)

[arsenal]

It will be a gentle afternoon of gentlemen gently discussing the matters of the day. So riff raff and hoi polloi such as those who interrupt pleasant chit chat with vulgarities and unpleasantries will not be invited.

[dab69]

Sunee is overstocked in gray teabags.


didn't know he was into that...

[scottish-guy]

.....pleasant chit chat...

I've never thought much of your chat but I'm happy to confirm you're full of chit

:yahoo_mini:

[arsenal]

Thank you Secottish Guy. Your expected scat reference is very funny. Thanks for posting.

[Mancs]

Not a cream tea but I think the cakes and tea on the 16th floor of the Hilton, Pattaya, might be a decent substitute. I took my 18 year old Thai gentleman friend there when he needed a rest from renting out jet skis on the beach. They may even have Earl Grey.

[frequent]

... my 18 year old Thai gentleman friend ...:D:)):rolleyes::yahoo_mini:

[poshglasgow]

Not a cream tea but I think the cakes and tea on the 16th floor of the Hilton, Pattaya, might be a decent substitute. I took my 18 year old Thai gentleman friend there when he needed a rest from renting out jet skis on the beach. They may even have Earl Grey.

Wasn't Earl Grey seen at the Pattaya Hilton with Lord Lucan recently? What are they up to, I wonder?

A 'gentleman' as part of the team hiring out jet skis on Pattaya Beach? No comment.

[scottish-guy]

Be fair - in my book all an 18yo has to do to be a gentleman is to not cum in your eye when he's aiming at your face

:D

[frequent]

Be fair - in my book all an 18yo has to do to be a gentleman is to not cum in your eye when he's aiming at your face I think that will go right over some posters' heads

[scottish-guy]

It's gone over mine - I have a stain on my headboard to prove it and which brings back very fond memories

:D

[poshglasgow]

I think that will go right over some posters' heads

Very good!!

[arsenal]

The Devonian method verses The Cornish method. Nations have gone to war over such Trifles. However here we are no Fools and I'm sure we would all Junket the idea as being very Syllabub.

[scottish-guy]

Are you pissed - that attempt at humour is a complete Eton Mess

[bkkguy]

Wasn't Earl Grey seen at the Pattaya Hilton with Lord Lucan recently? What are they up to, I wonder?

teabagging?

bkkguy

[francois]

Afternoon Tea is not a Cream Tea ( Francois will be along shortly to chastise you for straying off-topic)

A Cream Tea consists solely of Tea, Scones, Jam, and ....well, cream (clotted)

Cream Tea? What's the world coming to? Little wonder you decided to exit the European Union.

[scottish-guy]

.... Little wonder you decided to exit the European Union.


Depends who you mean by "you" - if you mean the English then you're correct

[a447]

I'm a great fan of the high tea, which I gather is a cream tea on steroids. I've actually never heard of a cream tea. And to be honest, it doesn't sound all that appealing. 'Tea' and 'cream' just don't go together in the same sentence. I know, I know....you don't put the cream in the tea, but still......

I like to enjoy a high tea on a Sunday afternoon when I'm travelling. Some memorable ones have been at the Oriental in Bangkok, the Eastern and Oriental in Penang, the New Otani in Tokyo and the Peninsula in Hong Kong. It's a great way to spend a long, lazy Sunday, especially if it's raining. And I don't need to bother about dinner that night. So I suppose you could also say it's rather economical.

But I've never thought I'd having high tea in Pattaya. I'd completely forgotten about the Hilton Hotel. I'm sure they'd do one.

It would be a great place to take my regular guy.

He's very hi-so, you know! Lol

[arsenal]

Thank you a447. I certainly appreciate your unparalleled knowledge of all things Thai.
:yahoo_mini:

[scottish-guy]

a447 - can you define what you mean by High Tea.



The Cream Tea has already been explained - tea served with scones, jam, and cream (usually clotted cream), an Afternoon Tea is tea with an assortment of sandwiches, cakes, pastries, and here in Scotland at least a High Tea is a substantial meal such as Fish and Chips, Steak Pie, Roast Pork, followed by some home baked goodies

[a447]

A high tea must just be another name for afternoon tea, served in a hi-so hotel, perhaps. It's quite an elaborate affair for which you have to dress appropriately in most places.

[scottish-guy]

I've already explained to you that a High Tea is a substantial meal whereas an Afternoon Tea is tea and sandwiches and cakes - would you kindly pay attention, these matters are vitally important.

:D

[a447]

The apposite word here is "hi-so."

[poshglasgow]

The apposite word here is "hi-so."

Those of us of Scottish descent are trained from a very early age to respect the importance of the 'High Tea' by participating in...High Chairs!!
6713

[Andaman!]

Actually a high tea would be served in a lo-so establishment as high tea was a manual workers meal. Afternoon tea would be served in a hi-so house or hotel.

The following article defines high tea rather well https://www.thespruce.com/afternoon-vs-high-tea-difference-435327

[a447]

I haven't seen any manual workers at any high tea I've been at.

Even the waiters make me feel under-dressed!

[scottish-guy]

Actually a high tea would be served in a lo-so establishment as high tea was a manual workers meal. Afternoon tea would be served in a hi-so house or hotel.

The following article defines high tea rather well https://www.thespruce.com/afternoon-vs-high-tea-difference-435327

You'll notice in that article that a High Tea in Scotland, as with most other things, is a special case