When your partner leaves...

[cdnmatt]

Alyways makes the place seem so quiet, doesn't it? Much cleaner, but more quiet. This is the time where the dogs realize he didn't just go to the market, so decide to huddle with me in my bedroom.

I know bobsaigaon gets the same when his guys leaves for a trip. Any other stories?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4y-RzVGrHg


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxLbNA6GHVw

[francois]

When my partner leaves, I play; always a Thai guy looking for money.

[cdnmatt]

Yeah, I'm sure he's going to play, but I won't be. Think I managed to signup for GR again, but I'm thinking Gmail is blocking their e-mails, so off I go to signup for another e-mail account somewhere, and try again.

Even if I do get logged in again though, then what? "Can you please describe what you look like in textual form?".

Hrmhhhh...

[Aux1010]

My partner's back in the Philippines at the moment visiting family. That's OK with me though, as I enjoy my own company (and am quite happy / easily amused drinking by myself lol). I don't think he plays while away and to be honest I wouldn't really mind if he does as our relationship's pretty casual. I don't play while he's away either, but when I'm away in Thailand (or Cambodia) I do like to sample some of the local goods :-).

So Matt, do you mean Leo's gone away for a trip, or gone away permanently? I hope it's option one!

[cdnmatt]

Oh no, just a short trip. Happens every 30 days due to VISA runs. He'll be back soon enough...

He said he wants to spend New Yers with me, but I told him not to. No point in hanging out with the boring blind guy. Stay in Laos, party with your friends, and have a good time.

[joe552]

Matt I'm not sure I'd do the same if I had a BF. Maybe take him for a special dinner and drinks? We're all different, I guess.

[cdnmatt]

Do what? Tell him to stay in Laos for New Years? Yeah, that's fine... I want him to go have fun in life, and it's not like I'm going anywhere, nor would I be any fun on New Years. I'm not going to want to go to a street party, because then there's loud explosions from the fireworks, tons of people cheering and counting down, etc. If anything, that would scare me, and I definitely wouldn't enjoy it.

Besides, he'll probably be back for New Years anyway. He'll worry about me too much, plus just let him have a couple showers in his village, and he'll probably be on the next bus back, haha...

I just hope he tells me when he's coming, and doesn't surprise me again. God I hate that. Dogs get excited, so I go to check it out, and all I see is the silohoutte of some guy standing in my house. Takes me a few seconds to figure out it's him.

[frequent]

Alyways makes the place seem so quiet, doesn't it? Much cleaner, but more quiet. This is the time where the dogs realize he didn't just go to the market, so decide to huddle with me in my bedroom.Have you thought about ditching Leo and sticking with the dogs? I know you're not interested in anal but I don't know that dogs give good head

[Smiles]

" ... and it's not like I'm going anywhere ... " What?? I was under the impression you are going to Vientiane to start a new life (and to dodge a new set of visa police).
Guess that was yesterday. Eh?
Personaly I think you've become so infatutated with the thousands of "LIKES" which Joe has showered over you for the last six months that you just can't stay away from such an ego-lifting adulation (Sawatdee being banned in Lao).

----------------------------------------------------------

On Topic: I'm the partner who goes away, not him. Back to Canada for a month every April (my mother's sick), and back just the other day for a 2-weeker (my mother died) in the the snow-ridden Okanagan.
And yes, the dear boy picked me up at Suvarnaphumi and off we scampered to The Pinnacle for two nights and one gigantic music fest at Tawan Daeng ... damn the jet lag.
Skip out on this cat? Heavens no. We've been humping for 17 years now and I don't think he would remember how to pick up anyone (so downright perfect was my pickup line from years ago), much less be very naughty ... he's 49, not 19 and enjoys his security, and life, too much.
And the Big Question: do I trust him? What do you think?

[cdnmatt]

What?? I was under the impression you are going to Vientiane to start a new life (and to dodge a new set of visa police).
Guess that was yesterday. Eh?


If you don't like my posts, then ignore them, and go read arsenal's emojis.

[joe552]

Smiles, sorry to hear of your Mom's passing. Mine died in January. Good wishes to you and Suphot for 2018.

[Smiles]

If you don't like my posts, then ignore them, and go read arsenal's emojis.
Who said anything about not liking your posts? I'm positively in love with the cannon-fodder.
(What's an 'emojis'?)

[cdnmatt]

@Smiles -- Sorry, you edited your post after I replied about your mother. My apologies on your loss. Hope you're doing alright, as I know already I'll be a mess for a couple weeks after my mother passes.


Leo's mother is actually going to make it. She'll be discharged and back home Friday. Early stages of alzheimers I guess, but that's no problem. She can come live with us, and we'll take care of her. She can tend to her flower bed or something, and make the house beautiful with flowers. Perfect!

[frequent]

What?? I was under the impression you are going to Vientiane to start a new life (and to dodge a new set of visa police).
Guess that was yesterday. Eh?The important thing about reading fiction, Smiles, is what's known as the "willing suspension of disbelief (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suspension_of_disbelief)". Matt writes in the "stream of consciousness (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stream_of_consciousness_%28narrative_mode%29)" style which makes the effort even more demanding. The important thing is to take it all as - at best - light entertainment, or - more likely - the form of therapy that Matt's psychiatrist has recommended. Write it all down and see if somehow it makes sense. Useful for dreams and fantasies I believe

[cdnmatt]

Are you guys serious?

I'm having a hard time grappling with what it must take to get into the mindset of some of you guys. Kind of the same as I have a hard time grappling with the fact Trump still has a single supporter in the US.

[Blueskytoday]

Goooo Trump

[frequent]

I'm having a hard time grappling with what it must take to get into the mindset of some of you guys. Kind of the same as I have a hard time grappling with the fact Trump still has a single supporter in the US.We've already established beyond any doubt that you're young, dumb and credulous, there's no need to ask us if we're serious

[francois]

frequent, I doubt that Matt is young and dumb. More likely old and smart and likes to play games. But until Joe finally meets him and confirms his existence we will not know. And I don't expect that to happen.

[frequent]

frequent, I doubt that Matt is young and dumb. More likely old and smart and likes to play games. But until Joe finally meets him and confirms his existence we will not know. And I don't expect that to happen.Ah but there's the difference between us francois. I don't care if Matt turns out to be an old,smart game-player or whether Joe does or doesn't verify that he has met someone answering Matt's description. It's all part of life's rich tapestry

[cdnmatt]

I'm not getting sucked back into this shit...

Does anyone else by chance have any stories of when they're apart from their partners for a while?

[arsenal]

Frequent wrote
"I don't care if Matt turns out to be an old,smart game-player."

Well he certainly manages to get permanently under the skin of some of the oldest and 'smartest' members here. Some of whom do little other than stalk Matt all over the board. It's quite funny to watch.

[latintopxxx]

Stalk?! Really? Matt is a prolific poster who launches topic after topic...he invites comments/challenges when his story doesnt quite add up...just saying.

[joe552]

I have to agree with latin - Matt has a knack of setting himself up. Deal with the flak, or stop posting.

[frequent]

Frequent wrote
"I don't care if Matt turns out to be an old,smart game-player."

Well he certainly manages to get permanently under the skin of some of the oldest and 'smartest' members here.Which rather goes to prove that they're not smart at all

[gerefan2]

@Smiles --


Leo's mother is actually going to make it. She'll be discharged and back home Friday!

That is just gross.

You’re telling us on Boxing Day, of all days., that she isn’t going to die.

You’ve been telling us for weeks that the funeral is just days away.

Mods...do something ....please.....

[Yraen]

I have to agree with latin - Matt has a knack of setting himself up. Deal with the flak, or stop posting.

Or - could it be - that Matt has a knack of setting targets to see who is gullible enough to 'shoot' at them?

[gerefan2]

The guys is a troll.
Isn’t that why we have mods???

[frequent]

Mods...do something ....please.....What are you proposing? Censorship? Talk to a447 - he's very keen on censoring, even on imperfect information
The guys is a troll. Isn’t that why we have mods???A troll is in the eye of the beholder

[cdnmatt]

The guys is a troll.
Isn’t that why we have mods???


If you haven't noticed, I'm the only one posting actual substance.

There was that Ox guy who let us know about his BF in the Phillipines (sp), and that was it. Aside from that, just one line responses of tripe.

[arsenal]

Matt wrote.
"If you don't like my posts, then ignore them, and go read arsenal's emojis."

That's fine and you did start this thread so anyone who comes here knows what to expect. However, you and Joe have spent the last few months derailing thread after thread with your childish nonsense so perhaps a poll.....If Joe and Matt don't actually meet should we get rid of them both? or something like that.

[frequent]

If you haven't noticed, I'm the only one posting actual substance.Substance abuse, perhaps

[cdnmatt]

Matt wrote.
"If you don't like my posts, then ignore them, and go read arsenal's emojis."

That's fine and you did start this thread so anyone who comes here knows what to expect. However, you and Joe have spent the last few months derailing thread after thread with your childish nonsense so perhaps a poll.....If Joe and Matt don't actually meet should we get rid of them both? or something like that.



Well, what would you like me to post about? I don't hang out in the Pattaya go-go bars, so I don't know what the drink prices are.

[frequent]

Well, what would you like me to post about? I don't hang out in the Pattaya go-go bars, so I don't know what the drink prices are.Keep posting just as you do - just don't expect people to take you seriously. I don't expect people to take me seriously and I've never been disappointed

[arsenal]

I take you seriously Frequent and it's only apposite that I do..

[frequent]

I take you seriously Frequent and it's only apposite that I do..Prince Andrew sends seasons greetings

[joe552]

That's fine with me, arsenal. This is just a bit of fun for me. Just let me know when the owner of the Board wants me to stop posting, and I will.

[arsenal]

Polls carry no weight apart from opinion Joe.Start one about me if you want.

[cdnmatt]

Joe never mentioned anything about starting a poll about you...

[arsenal]

Just making the point Matt. Had everyone voted against you in the recent poll it would have made no difference to anything. You'd still be entitled to post your 'life story'. We don't have tyranny of the majority here.

[cdnmatt]

Anyway, back on topic. One good thing about your partner leaving for a while is the constant chaos stops. The calm is quite nice, although I'd prefer the chaos to be honest.

And since this thread is already derailed, alzheimers isn't life threatening, is it? It's just a degenerative brain disease that makes you senile and forgetful, right? That's fine, she can come live with us, help take care of the kids, tend to her garden, watch some Thai soaps, etc.

Maybe we'll microchip her. "Kids! Your grandma isn't back yet, so she's probably lost again. Can you login, and get her GPS coordinates, so we can pick her up?", haha. Sorry, cruel joke.

[joe552]

I rather like the idea of a microchip Matt. I looked after my mother with dementia for a few years before she went into a nursing home. It was challenging,, and exhausting at times, but I would't have it any other way. She mainly just watched TV. And I took her to Mass every day. She was very happy with that. The nursing home had a small chapel and daily Mass. That helped ease her into her new life there.

[joe552]

Matt, just a word of caution about having her come live with you. People with dementia need familiarity - their own possessions around them. They know where the bathroom is, for instance. So I'd be reluctant to take her away from her family and familiar surroundings. Instead, maybe consider employing a carer (part time) with experience of dementia?

[frequent]

Matt, just a word of caution about having her come live with you. People with dementia need familiarity - their own possessions around them. They know where the bathroom is, for instance. So I'd be reluctant to take her away from her family and familiar surroundings. Instead, maybe consider employing a carer (part time) with experience of dementia?My thoughts precisely - living with and caring for someone with dementia is very difficult on the carers too - but I'm not sure that Laos would have experienced resources anyway. Bangkok does

[frequent]

We don't have tyranny of the majority here.Just the tyranny of uninformed Moderators

[cdnmatt]

Matt, just a word of caution about having her come live with you. People with dementia need familiarity - their own possessions around them. They know where the bathroom is, for instance. So I'd be reluctant to take her away from her family and familiar surroundings. Instead, maybe consider employing a carer (part time) with experience of dementia?


Her new husband (Leo's step father) didn't even visit her in the hospital, so he's obviously totally fucken useless.

You want me to go hire nurses to go live with her in her village? Yeah... no. And we're not putting her in a home, because Asian families just don't do that. They take care of each other.

I guess one of Leo's sisters owns a hotel somwehere, so maybe she'll step up and take her in. I don't know, not up to me. I just made sure Leo knows she's more than welcome to come live with us, because she'll no longer be able to take care of herself, and her husband is obviously useless. There will be Leo, myself, and two kids, so that's a pretty strong base of support and care.

I don't know, up to the family, not me. I just made sure Leo knows the door is open, and I'm happy to take her in.

[joe552]

Ok Matt, you're right - it's Leo and his family's decision. You've made the offer - now up to them.

[bobsaigon2]

Matt, "a pretty strong base of support and care"? It would be totally on Leo's shoulders. Try to picture the burdens in Leo's daily life if he had to care for a mother with dementia, two young nephews and a blind partner who is not fluent in Lao and is useless in providing any kind of support and care. That would be enough to make him head for the nearest wat to resume his monastic life.

[joe552]

Matt, I think bob makes a good point. If you're taking on the 2 nephews, looking after his mother with dementia, just seems too much. You seem to want to do what you can for Leo and his family, but you have to be realistic.

[cdnmatt]

Matt, "a pretty strong base of support and care"? It would be totally on Leo's shoulders. Try to picture the burdens in Leo's daily life if he had to care for a mother with dementia, two young nephews and a blind partner who is not fluent in Lao and is useless in providing any kind of support and care. That would be enough to make him head for the nearest wat to resume his monastic life.



What? It's hardly all on his shoulders. You think taking care of a family of 5 (Leo, myself, 2 kids, an elderly grandma) and two dogs is going to be cheap? Someone will need to ensure that money shows up in the bank account, and that would be me. I'm sure I'll also end up being the cook in the family, so I'll be the one cooking every breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

The kids won't be useless. They'll help clean the floor, do the dishes, laundry, take care of Leo's mom, etc.

Yeah, Leo will have a decent amount on his shoulders, but so will I, and so will the kids. That's life.

The gury is still out on the mother anyway. She's in a hospital right now learning how to walk again, then will go back to her village. Then the family has a decision to make, and not up to me. She's going to need care though, so I just made sure Leo knows I'm happy to step up to the plate if needed.

[Smiles]

Matt, I think bob makes a good point. If you're taking on the 2 nephews, looking after his mother with dementia, just seems too much. You seem to want to do what you can for Leo and his family, but you have to be realistic.M. Joe, I really think that you should put off your Meat & Greet date until exactly April 1/18. That date would be much more appropriate in my opinion, as well as being deep in the Heart of Irony.
Matt has apparently pushed up his latest bowel movement to Vientiane to "sometime in the future", so pushing up yours should not be a tight issue.

Just a gut feeling on my part, therefore "up to you".

[joe552]

Smiles, I enjoy getting out of the "Pattaya bubble" for a couple of days. If I don't get to meet Matt, kkjason has invited me for a beer, which is great. I've also had an invite to meet in Bangkok with another poster. So it's all good.

[bobsaigon2]

Of course Leo is not going to worry about the money, that's not part of his burden. It's everything else that he will have to deal with, including convincing mom and 2 nephews, who have never eaten anything but Lao food, that Chicken cordon bleu, kick-ass or not, is an acceptable replacement for khao Lao. No need to worry about them becoming obese if all the food is cooked by a farang.

"The kids will clean the floor, do the dishes, laundry, take care of Leo's mom, etc." And who teaches them what to do and checks to see that everything is done right? The blind farang? No, back to Leo again. It's still all on his shoulders.

Bonne chance.

[cdnmatt]

I can make good curries and stir-frys too, bob. If they don't like what I cook, there's always markets with sticky rice and bamboo soup nearby.

And yeah, it'll be Leo's job to hold down the house. He's 23, he's a big boy. Besides, it was his decision to take the kids, as he wants to be a father far more than me. It's just the more I thought about it, the more I want it too. And he'd make an amazing father, that I already know. Everyone has a gift in life, and his is taking care of others. Why do you think I'm still alive? No question in my mind, he'll be great with the kids, and will love every minute of it. He'll be in the wife role, while I'll be in the husband role. Already discussed at length.

Then don't know about the mother. Life sucks, shit happens, and someone needs to step up and take care of her, because she won't be able to take care of herself any longer. I've done my job, I've offered, and am more than happy to make good on that offer. Whether or not someone else in the family steps up remains to be seen, as Leo seems uncertain at the moment.

If nobody wants her, then we'll take her. Same as if the mother doesn't want those kids, then we'll take them.

[bobsaigon2]

All noble and fine in theory. Hope it works out to your satisfaction.

[Aux1010]

If you haven't noticed, I'm the only one posting actual substance.

There was that Ox guy who let us know about his BF in the Phillipines (sp), and that was it. Aside from that, just one line responses of tripe.

Haha, am I "that Ox guy"?? I like that as a nickname! Just to keep things on topic again, my boyfriend works as a nursing clinical supervisor in aged / dementia care. Having known a couple of my own workmates who've cared for parents with dementia...it's definitely not an easy task!!

[cdnmatt]

Ohhh, haha, sorry. I checked, it's "Aux". Sorry, in screen reader it sounds like "Ox".

Leo doesn't seem to realize what's going to happen to his mom. Tried explaining it to him in terms he'll understand. Hey honey, you know those times I tried to go to the market by myself, got myself totally lost, was fucked, and had to wait for someone to help me get home? Yeah, your mom is going to be like that, but 24x7.

[joe552]

Matt, my experience of my mother's dementia was not 24x7. For much of the time, she knew who we were, what was going on, and could hold a normal conversation. Much of that was due to the familiarity of her surroundings. Walking the same way to Mass every day. It was only in the last couple of years of her life that she really struggled with her memory. When she was in the nursing home, she sometimes was aware that she knew us, but didn't know exactly who we were. For instance, she would often ask about my children and to be honest, I would use that as an excuse to leave - I have to get home to make the kids' dinner.

Trying to take on an older woman with dementia and 2 kids at the same time, sound like a recipe for disaster. I think you have the best of intentions, but you need to be realistic. It's peoples' lives we're talking about. I don't have a disability, and would struggle to to take care of either the mother or the kids, but I certainly couldn't do both.

Btw, how do you feel about inviting kkjason to join us for dinner on 15th?

[francois]

Amazing, people are posting responses as if this whole situation was real and not some sort of fantasy. Got to give credit to Matt for his writing skills. Can't wait for Joe to clear it all up for us. 55555

[joe552]

francois, I choose to believe that Matt is who he claims to be, until I meet him or not in Khon Kaen. Until then, I'll take what he writes at face value.

[cdnmatt]

@Joe -- Exactly, that's why I want to take her now, and am pushing for it. Get her familiar with her new home and family now, before the alzheimers truly sets in. Leo doesn't seem too interested in it though, which is of no real surprise. He got bounced around from house to house as a kid, then at 13 got sent to the temple to live as a novice for 7 years, because nobody was willing / able to take care of him. He loves his parents and everything, but there seems to be an extent on it.

I don't know. I did my job, and ensured the door is open. Up to the family, not me.

[joe552]

Ok you've made the offer. We'll wait and see what the family decide.

[sglad]

...That would be enough to make him head for the nearest wat to resume his monastic life.

...or demand a script re-write! Too soon to be written off the show!

[bobsaigon2]

...or demand a script re-write! Too soon to be written off the show!

True. OK, keep Leo, mom, nephews, dogs in the picture. After a couple of months, it’s Matt who decides he can no longer cope with the domestic chaos and decamps to his neighborhood Wat, dons an orange robe, and starts to learn how to chant in Pali and study sutras (don’t know if they’re available in Braille or screen reader format). That way we’d get insight into the daily life of a foreign monk in Laos, and, with Leo stopping by the Wat to report to Matt every day, we’d stay in touch with the activities of the household. Could be good.

[sglad]

True. OK, keep Leo, mom, nephews, dogs in the picture. After a couple of months, it’s Matt who decides he can no longer cope with the domestic chaos and decamps to his neighborhood Wat, dons an orange robe, and starts to learn how to chant in Pali and study sutras (don’t know if they’re available in Braille or screen reader format). That way we’d get insight into the daily life of a foreign monk in Laos, and, with Leo stopping by the Wat to report to Matt every day, we’d stay in touch with the activities of the household. Could be good.

Now that's just cynical.

[joe552]

bob - nail, head, hit.

[Nirish guy]

francois, I choose to believe that Matt is who he claims to be, until I meet him or not in Khon Kaen. Until then, I'll take what he writes at face value.

Why ?? Just cause you meet someone doesn't mean they aren't full of shit or simply continuing to spin you the same bullshit stories face to face that they fed you online??

Hell if that were the case every other farang I've ever met in bars in Thailand MUST all have been the millionaire playboys they claimed and WERE just sitting in that dingy bar in dirty clothes for a rest from their usual monte carlo style lives elsewhere then after all.

PS Joe if we ever meet up remind me to ask you for a lend of £20000, I normally carry that small amount in my back pocket but came out with out my wallet today, but dont worry my driver will be along just after I leave to repay you in full - cause see people in bars, who you dont know I mean they definitely wouldn't ever talk just pure shit and lies to you now ever - would they ??

So, lets start with when you meet someone there as arranged and so you say "Ahhh so Matt, we finally meet" - "yes says he" - so, there's your first lie then and you can take the rest from there then.....

[joe552]

To be honest, I'm finding this discussion incredibly boring. In a moment of madness, or drunkeness, I said I'd go to meet Matt to stop all the speculation about whether he was a genuine person or not (and at my own expense, which I regret now). What do you guys expect as "proof"? If I meet a blind young Canadian in KK, with a Lao BF, what more do you want? I will post on the 16h - I met a blind Canadian in his 30s, or I didn't meet anyone resembling that description.

Just leave it for a couple of weeks.

[Nirish guy]

You’re assuming Joe that anyone wants anything, as you said yourself YOU decided to go to KK, no one asked you too or is forcing you too. I doubt anyone cares that much other than a passing interest as to how that particular saga ends up or unfolds.

Personally if I were you I’d just be focusing on having an enjoyable holiday than anything else, but as you’ve said you’re using your KK trip as your usual side trip then I guess it’s ticking that box already for you and the whole Matt saga should only be a minor side bar to that main goal I would imagine.

[joe552]

NIrish, you're generally correct. Meeting a blind Canadian in KK won't make him any less of a dickhead, asshole, fantasist - choose whichever you want. It will simply prove (to me at least) that a blind 30s Canadian is living in KK. It won't change his personality.

And as I said, I'm happy to get out of Pattaya for a couple of days - especially if my old friend comes with me.

[Nirish guy]

Ahhh but will your old friend tell you what sort of beer he wants in the fridge in advance or not, THAT is the question !! :) My god you're nearly as bad as that guy you're going to meet there for starting big will he / won't he story lines....the only difference being that I believe yours entirely or at the least believe that they're made by someone who hasn't (totally) lost the plot and lost their grip on ACTUAL reality ( or is just a pure troll). PS note the "totally" there just mind ! joking! :)

[cdnmatt]

Now what's so unrealistic about my fantasy life, as you guys call it? That Leo went back to Laos for a VISA run? Or that his mom got alzheimers?

You bet, fake news.

Granted, I post about it more than I should, but this is just a typical, every day life.

[Blueskytoday]

Might I ask CDNMATT...seriously as I don't know..how does one who is blind read and reply to posts? do you have a machine that can do this?

[joe552]

He's already answered that question a number of times

[frequent]

Granted, I post about it more than I should, but this is just a typical, every day life.We understand you're just a needy snowflake, Matt, we do understand

[cdnmatt]

Might I ask CDNMATT...seriously as I don't know..how does one who is blind read and reply to posts? do you have a machine that can do this?



Orca screen reader for LINUX. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRuwjFyb400

Except I have the speed of my speech set about 500% faster than that.