Your SE Asian guy

[joe552]

Just being curious. Would those of you with a BF in Thailand, Vietnam or wherever, bring them to your home country if you could?

[bobsaigon2]

Yes, but just for a visit. My Vietnamese bf is very attached to family, culture, food, music. With the exception of the family element, he could find everything else in the Vietnamese areas of many US cities, but without an occupation he would soon be bored.

[a447]

.... but without an occupation he would soon be bored.

As he would also be without Vietnamese friends.

Some people underestimate the importance of family in Asia. Trading your family for a life of plenty far away from them would be difficult for any length of time. So a short visit is definitely the way to go.

I've heard a number is very sad stories over the years of farang who have taken their guy to live with them in Europe and it ended in disaster. It wasn't only because they had little contact with their families - they had no friends with whom they could speak to in their own language, couldn't communicate with the locals, had nothing to do except "take care" of their farang and, of course, couldn't bear the European winters.

Hardly a recipe for success.

But that's not to say there are no exceptions. I'm sure there are couples who have somehow managed to make it work.

[joe552]

Thanks for the replies. Bob, am I right in assuming you actually live in Vietnam full time? Are you one of those guys who went over there in the war and never made it home? By choice.

Sorry if that's too personal, choose not to answer if you want. I have to admit I get lonely here in Dublin (especially at 4 in the morning) so I'm just looking for idle chit chat. One of my brothers moved to Cambodia a few years ago. We don't talk to each other anymore. He was always a selfish prick and none of his 6 kids stays in touch with him.

Sorry for digressing. Bob, thanks for your response. I find it interesting.

[bobsaigon2]

Joe, I do live here in Vietnam full time. Never served in the military, first visit to Vietnam was in 1989 after I had started an agency to assist Vietnamese immigrant visa applicants. I relocated to Saigon in 2000, been with the same Vietnamese partner since then, so yes, I am here by choice. I would dearly love to be able to make an annual trip to the US, but for the past couple of years my lungs have been unable to support such a journey. Materially, I have everything I want, so that's not a problem. Just can't find white breakfast pudding at any of the supermarkets.

[Yraen]

Just being curious. Would those of you with a BF in Thailand, Vietnam or wherever, bring them to your home country if you could?

Yes!

That said, my partner and I live in different countries (Australia/Thailand), follow our own career paths and interests, maintain our local friendships/family contacts. We exchange visits at least once per year for 1-3 months in each location. We both feel comfortable in the other's country. We intermingle our friendships when visiting. Yet we still have our "own personal space".

When I first started visiting Thailand, I underestimated the "family thing". Given the malnourishment and physical discomforts doled out to him as a kid, I just could not understand why he kept wanting to maintain contact with the people who had mistreated him. Then I started to learn about Thai familial customs. Finally, an epiphany moment - it was not greatly different to Aus in the 1950s and earlier. Family and kids were the security and "superannuation fund" - the younger looking after and keeping the elderly as necessary. Now, when in Thailand, I just go-with-the flow, enjoy the family events and ignore the "history".

I think we have the best of both worlds.

[latintopxxx]

stockholm syndrome....no wonder the country is the way it is...no hope

[joe552]

stockholm syndrome....no wonder the country is the way it is...no hope

latin, you can be such an asshole sometimes (all the time). Why did you take the trouble to post that. What country is in the way it with no hope? Just stick to your posts about your 500Bt fucks - about all you can do.

Yrean, thanks for you post. An interesting alternative to one or other of you moving and adjusting to another country. Glad it's working for you. Have to ask you, though. your surname can be read as a very popular Irish surname. Would I be right? I know that's a very person question, so answer by PM or not at all. Maybe your ancestors went over early on?

I'm very interested in my family history. There was a story that one of my great great's came over to Ireland when the Hugenots moved from France to escape persecution. I traced both sides back to the 1820s, and not a bit of French blood, although the Hugenots came much earlier. In fact, neither side of the family came from further than about 3 or 4 miles from where I was born (in Dublin city centre) and where I still live.

I had an email last year from the daughter of a cousin of mine who went to Australia. She'd found my website online (where else, Joe?). Interesting to talk to her.

Anyway, sorry, that went on a bit longer than I intended!

Oh, and Bob - glad to hear you've made a happy life over there. Always good to hear the success stories!

[scottish-guy]

I would have my Vietnamese bf over here in a heartbeat - and he is desperate to come. But without re-hashing all our UK Visa travails - it doesnt look like it will ever happen.

However we are trying yet again to get a Visitor visa for Xmas and New Year and I have even invited his father in the hope that might assist in securing it - so watch this space but I have no expectation of success

[joe552]

Ah, SG I really hope you can make that happen. But fuck, winter in Scotland compared to Vietnam? I have relatives in Fife and Glasgow who I'd happily visit in June or July, but Christmas? Not a fuckin' chance!

Bob, the sausage you mention - is that what we call white pudding? Also comes in black pudding. Usually served with proper Irish breakfast or the other version - English/Welsh/Scottish. We always had it for Saturday tea. No cooked breakfast in the morning - a bowl of cornflakes (or yucky porridge in winter) and a cup of tea, then off to work or school. But on Saturday evening, most of the family were home, so we'd do the whole full Irish fry. Hated the black pudding! Could I bring over some white pudding in January if you're having a craving? Bought in my local butcher, not supermarket shite.

Just let me know.

[scottish-guy]

A white pudding - meant to be kept under refrigeration - in a suitcase - on a 24hour door to door journey - via Dubai luggage transfer (in 40c heat) and 1.5 hours in an Airport-Pattaya taxi (in 38c heat)

What are you thinking of?

Bob would be safer eating Monty's chicken soup

[bobsaigon2]

Thanks for the offer, Joe. I am indeed talking about white pudding, but I've yet to try it, and since I wouldn't be coming to Thailand.....but again thanks.

Black pudding is definitely not on my bucket list. The white pudding is, along with farl, soda bread (which my Italian mother made quite well), and decent boxty (tried to make that but was not satisfied with my effort).

I am in denial about my age, health, prospects of next life activity. With plenty of time at my disposal, I rewrite the scenario of this life or create a fantasy version of a next life in which I would live in a small town on the West coast of Ireland. Maybe Co Clare since my father was told that's where his side of the family originated. I would want to live not too far from a good grocery, butcher and a TESCO/Aldi/Lidl/Supervalu. Yes, it's food I dream about, and luxuriating in front of an open fire while that cold rain pelts against the windows. And no need for air-conditioning. :)

[joe552]

SG, you're probably right. I'm actually flying with Turkish Airlines for the first time via Istanbul. I was just trying to curry favour with Bob (curry favour is a recipe my grandfather brought back after his service in the British Army in India around 1904).

Bob, as I've mentioned elsewhere, I have an interest (and a wee bit of experience) in family trees. If you'd like me to do a little research for you, I'd be more than happy to. Just send any ideas (like names, places, when the family might have gone to the States) by PM, and I'll see what I can find. Only if you're interested, of course. I'm afraid I'm a city boy. Lived 8 miles outside Kilkenny city for a year in an old castle. Lovely place, but an hour's walk to the pub? And probably 2 hours home. Never again!

[joe552]

As a side note, my grandfather (my mother's father) actually served in the Boer War of the late 1890s, was in India for 2 years, and was injured in a gas attack in France in 1916. Well, sorry, I think it's interesting!

[bobsaigon2]

Joe, I wish I could provide some details in response to your very helpful offer, but my father never had much to say about his ancestry. I think he enjoyed the idea of being Irish-American but that never went much further than appreciating corned beef and cabbage, which I understand is rarely served in Ireland. When my parents visited Dublin, a genealogist seemed to confirm that the family might have roots in Co Clare. Attempting to build a family tree out of that was hopeless. Still, I enjoy memories of my school days, memories rekindled by the family names I see on the Irish websites. Seems like half of my schoolmates were of Irish descent.

[joe552]

Well Bob, I have to say Saigon is not a very common Irish name, so I thought it would be fairly easy?

[bobsaigon2]

Good one, Joe.

[colmx]

I would live in a small town on the West coast of Ireland. Maybe Co Clare since my father was told that's where his side of the family originated.

My Father too... Perhaps we are related!
Have you ever been to Clare? Its pretty desolate in the winter... Suggest you move your fantasy to the south east (Wexford Waterford) where they get mild winters and you can grow strawberries in the summer!

[colmx]

Just being curious. Would those of you with a BF in Thailand, Vietnam or wherever, bring them to your home country if you could?
He's been here around 6-7 times... Doesn't like nor dislike Ireland... but hates the visa application process... the long queues in Supermarkets, the infrequent/unreliable public transport and the (sometimes)ignorant shopkeepers from South Asia

[bobsaigon2]

My Father too... Perhaps we are related!
Have you ever been to Clare? Its pretty desolate in the winter... Suggest you move your fantasy to the south east (Wexford Waterford) where they get mild winters and you can grow strawberries in the summer!

I was in Clare only in summer. In my fantasy searches, West Ireland is more attractive because it is less crowded and real estate prices are somewhat lower than elsewhere. I'll have another look at the Waterford housing market. Convenient location for purchase of fine crystal ware.

[francois]

Just being curious. Would those of you with a BF in Thailand, Vietnam or wherever, bring them to your home country if you could?

Easy answer, Never, Never, Never.

[Smiles]

I wouldn't take Pot to Canada (British Columbia that is) ... it's "kinda OK" and I still have lots of friends there I keep in touch with.
But we have (one of these days) plans to go to Europe for 2 or 3 months. It is of course a much smaller area than Canada and within the area as a whole there's a billion things to see that he would definitely enjoy.

[scottish-guy]

Now, I'm not one to pick holes but Europe is not smaller than Canada - quite the reverse.


Europe land mass: 10.18 million Km2
Canada land mass: 9.985 million Km2

[Smiles]

OK ... you are including Russia I presume. Let's just call 'my Europe' Little Europe. You knew that anyway, right?
Like oranges and apples people should not compare ... also continents and countries.

[joe552]

I think Smiles has it on this one!

[Moses]

OK ... you are including Russia I presume. Let's just call 'my Europe' Little Europe. You knew that anyway, right?
Like oranges and apples people should not compare ... also continents and countries.

No for sure. Russia alone is 17+ mln

but looks like it is size of official European part of Eurasia continent (which includes European part of Russia, which is 1/5 of Russian territory and is 3.5 mln sq.km)

5514

[joe552]

To be honest, I've never been a size queen. But you guys go ahead.

[latintopxxx]

canada??? really??? does ice count??? Fucking place is mostly a frozen wasteland

[joe552]

well, latinpox, that was a most incisive comment. I lived in BC for about a year, hardly a wasteland - Vancouver being a great (if expensive) city to live in. But I lived up north. Small towns, had a ball.

[scottish-guy]

OK ... you are including Russia I presume. Let's just call 'my Europe' Little Europe. You knew that anyway, right?
Like oranges and apples people should not compare ... also continents and countries.

Coming late to your response but as Moses has already said: Europe excluding Russia is larger than Canada - and since it was you making the comparison Smiles, you can't complain about "continents v countries"

[arsenal]

Canada is just a big version of Scotland but without the moaning.
😜

[scottish-guy]

The number of Canadians of Scottish descent almost equals the current population of Scotland, and accounts for 15% of Canada's total population - so I'm surprised there's not a lot more moaning.

This can only be due to the fact that there is not 10x as many English living nearby and pissing them off

[francois]

20% of the Canadian population are French speaking but they don't moan, just croak.:devilsh:

Sorry for posting something that has nothing to do with the OP's post. But isn't that the way it goes on this forum?

[joe552]

Indeed francois

[latintopxxx]

..scots do well once away from scatland...