Americans at Thai gay-friendly hotels....

[werner]

I have just returned to my work [ugh....]after several nights of great fun in Bangkok.
Yes, the go-go bars were alive, and I enjoyed myself....

Now for my comments: I hope that this does NOT sound anti-American. I lived about 7 years of my life in the U.S. and have many American friends. For the record: I am European but have lived all over the world.

During my trip to Bangkok, I stayed two nights at Tarntawan Hotel and two nights at Pinnacle Hotel. At both places, chatty, elderly, gay Americans sat down near my breakfast table and started talking away and tried to socialize with me.

[I know that they did NOT do so to pick me up. I am almost 70, a bit overweight, and well-past my handsome youth.]

I did NOT want to be unfriendly or rude, but why do Americans like to talk to strangers so much? And why do they think that everyone wants to hear their complaints about the recent American election? Yes, Trump is awful, but I do have to hear their diatribes? Why can't I just enjoy my coffee and a good book, and get ready for an evening of hot action?

Have I become a cantankerous old man because I do NOT like small talk with strangers?
Is there some polite way to tell Americans that I do not want to socialize?
Is it necessary for all gay elderly farang travelers in Bangkok to be friendly with each other?

[a447]

Is it necessary for all gay elderly farang travelers in Bangkok to be friendly with each other?

I don't know if it's necessary, but I think maybe some feel a sense of camaraderie - they are all there for the same thing.

I'm also not one for small talk; I put up with it in the gogo bars because I have an end in mind, so to speak.

I've met lots of Americans in my travels over the years and apart from one or two (some can guess who one of them is) I've found them to be lovely people. A little ignorant of things non -American perhaps, but lovely nonetheless.

On a recent bus trip along the coast in Croatia my friend and I found ourselves sitting next to a couple from Wisconsin. I was reluctant to get involved in a conversation but we ended up having a great discussion about this and that and a long, boring trip was made bearable.

[werner]

a447,
Thanks for your comments.

Well, if I were on a long, boring bus trip in Croatia, I too might enjoy small talk with Americans. But Bangkok is not a long, boring trip...

Perhaps I should not generalize, but yes, most Americans are friendly and mean well. And yes, we elderly, gay farang should have a sense of camaraderie, but at 9:00 in morning? I am NOT a morning person, and need to wake up....

[Jellybean]

I suggest you wear a Do Not Disturb sign around your neck at breakfast werner. That should fix your problem for sure.

:D

[Old git]

The Americans seem to have the unique ability of exporting their least suitable citizens as tourists.

Back in their natural habitat, the east coast Americans are generally unashamed to be seen trying to get rich, while those on the west coast are generally unashamed about flaunting their wealth. Those who live in between have often never left the country, and are often massively uninformed about the rest of the world, but aside from that can be some of the nicest and most hospitable folk on the planet..

[werner]

Americans are nice, and I have great American friends.

But some Americans are sooooooo talkative, even with strangers. I much prefer the more reserved nature of many Europeans [and Asians].

Moreover, Americans often think the world revolves around the U.S. and that non-Americans are idiots. Yes, yes, chatty Americans, I understand your damn electoral college system, and I do not want a lecture about it at 9:00 AM at breakfast at a gay-friendly hotel in Bangkok. Yes, yes, I understand that some Americans hate Trump, and I do not want a detailed description about how you opposed him.

[francois]

Have I become a cantankerous old man because I do NOT like small talk with strangers?
Is there some polite way to tell Americans that I do not want to socialize?
Is it necessary for all gay elderly farang travelers in Bangkok to be friendly with each other?

Yes, to answer your question, you are a cantankerous old man. However all you have to do is start jabbering in your native language. Or, at least, "Me no speaka English" :D

[cdnmatt]

Just poolitely tell them, "sorry, but if you don't mind, I'm quite involved with my book at the moment"? Who cares if they take offense, as you'll most likely never see them again in your life.

[Smiles]

I suggest you wear a Do Not Disturb sign around your neck at breakfast
You'll have to find a larger two-by-four I'm afraid Jellybean.That less-than-subtle personal space stop sign has never been known to hold back a needy American from detailing his/her entire life story over a bowl of chocolate coco puffs ... and I mean 'entire'!
While your thinking peace and quiet, he's thinking next target.

I hear you. Sitting in a funky coffee shop, in an out-of-the way corner reading the Globe and Mail (et al) is a small heaven to me ... but apparently not to the dude who decides I need a friend. Desperately.
"Fuck off" is unfortunately the end game in unwanted tete-a-tetes.

[francois]

werner,it could have been much worse! Perhaps some snotty French queens having a spate or a couple of Germans shouting at each other as they are apt to do, or worse, some drunken Russians at 9 am. Since you speak excellent English they likely thought you to be a fellow American or Canadian?

[Nirish guy]

Since you speak excellent English they likely thought you to be a fellow American?

And why should one of those automatically allow presumption of the other as it's rarely found to be the case !??

[scottish-guy]

Indeed NIrish - being American and speaking excellent English are mutually exclusive.

One of my current bugbears is the extremely ugly yet increasingly common Americanism "gotten"

[francois]

One of my current bugbears is the extremely ugly yet increasingly common Americanism "gotten"

Terrible word, I have forgotten when I last used gotten.

[francois]

One of my current bugbears is the extremely ugly yet increasingly common Americanism "gotten"

I do wonder where that ugly word originated?

Soon gotten, soon spent; ill gotten, ill spent. John Heywood


John Heywood (1497–1580) was an English writer known for his plays, poems, and collection of proverbs.

WHEN first my brave Johnie lad came to this town,
He had a blue bonnet that wanted the crown;
But now he has gotten a hat and a feather,
Hey, brave Johnie lad, cock up your beaver! Robert Burns


Robert Burns, also known as Rabbie Burns, the Bard of Ayrshire and various other names and epithets, was a Scottish poet and lyricist. He is widely regarded as the national poet of Scotland and is celebrated worldwide.

[dab69]

well you describe yourself as elderly so you won't have to put up with it much longer

[fountainhall]

I find my iPad Mini works wonders at keeping Americans and any others at bay in the morning. I just wish them a good morning and tell them I'm checking the news on BBC and CNN. For whatever reason, that almost always suits them up!

[Dalewood]

I do wonder where that ugly word originated?

Soon gotten, soon spent; ill gotten, ill spent. John Heywood


John Heywood (1497–1580) was an English writer known for his plays, poems, and collection of proverbs.

WHEN first my brave Johnie lad came to this town,
He had a blue bonnet that wanted the crown;
But now he has gotten a hat and a feather,
Hey, brave Johnie lad, cock up your beaver! Robert Burns



When the English arrived in North America, gotten was the word. As time passed, it became got in Britain but remained gotten in North America.

[francois]

When the English arrived in North America, gotten was the word. As time passed, it became got in Britain but remained gotten in North America.

Oh, you mean it was forgotten in Britain? :))

Just wanted Scottish guy to know the origins of gotten. If it is good enough for Robert Burns it is good enough for me.

[francois]

Apologies to the OP, werner, for wandering off topic.

Best way to avoid interaction with other, elderly, friendly,gay American men is to put in some ear buds and pretend you don't hear them.

[scottish-guy]

That's what I like about this board, Francois - I learn something every day

[GWMinUS]

And you know We Chatty Americans always enjoy conversation with a French speaking Canadian!!

[werner]

Thanks for your comments.

Maybe I should stop being a cantankerous and bitchy European, and be friendly with chatty Americans who approach me.

Jelly Bean: I love your acerbic wit, but the DO NOT DISTURB signs are too small to deter Americans.

dab69: Despite being almost 70, I will NOT pass away soon. I have great genes. [My parents had good health until their mid 80s, and several (heterosexual) uncles enjoyed active love lives until their late 80s.]

Unfortunately, I can be mistaken for American because I can speak English with an American/Canadian accent. [When I speak French, Canadians immediately realize I am European because I have a Swiss accent.]

Oh, but what do with the chatty Americans? I realize that they mean well, and are just trying to be friendly. But must these chatty Americans try to start a conversation as we ride down the elevator from the 14th floor of Pinnacle Hotel? Must they offer me food and drinks when I sit outside at the Telephone restaurant and enjoy people watching on the gay soi? 45 years ago when I was hot and handsome, many elderly gays stayed to chat me up [and pick me up]. Must I endure this now when I go to Bangkok?

[werner]

Is there any editing function for the posts?
The chatty Americans certainly do NOT want to pick me up, they obviously just want to chat for some reason.....

[rincondog]

Is there any editing function for the posts?
The chatty Americans certainly do NOT want to pick me up, they obviously just want to chat for some reason.....

As a non-chatty American the last thing I would want to do is chat with a bunch of old European Queens.

[loke]

Is there any editing function for the posts?
The chatty Americans certainly do NOT want to pick me up, they obviously just want to chat for some reason.....

Consider yourself lucky that someone wants to talk to you at your age , Americans or anyone else. I mean that in a good way , too many lonely souls out there.

[Oliver]

My only falang friend in Pattaya died recently- an American, and he's greatly missed- and now that the management at Ambiance is no longer falang, I realise that I speak only to Thais when I'm in Thailand. No problem, except that, for a week after I return to London, I find myself speaking the Thinglish which my boyfriend and I use.

[scottish-guy]

It's when you....


routinely refer to your "loom"
ask "how a you tomollow" to people you meet
tell shop assistants "Thank you very big"



....that you need to worry.

:p

[Oliver]

"Home-me" and "ching-chong" are my ear-worms.

[francois]

"Home-me" and "ching-chong" are my ear-worms.

Why ching-chong? Is there a better term?

[scottish-guy]

"Suckee-Fuckee" works the world round

[goji]

I've usually found Americans who I meet in Thailand to be very pleasant. I socialise with some of them on multiple trips.

[Also, we should all feel grateful, since as European governments are too dumb to spend enough on defence, it has been very good of the US to prop up NATO]

[chillnorther]

Try scowling more in the lift. The uncouth buggers may be mistaking you for an Australian and think you capable of displaying both courtesy and good humor at the same time. Not that you aren't a friendly sort judging by your posts-- as long as people know their places.

[francois]

So just what is meaning of ching-chong? Thought I knew but now I don't.

[Jellybean]

So just what is meaning of ching-chong? Thought I knew but now I don't.

I’m in the same boat, François. I have heard and describe myself as ting-tong, but I have never heard anyone say, ching-chong. I am guessing it might be Thai slang for having sexual intercourse, or am I way off base?

Urban dictionary provides the following meaning:

The only word arrogant non-Asians think all Asians say.

White Kid: Hey, what does ching chong mean?

Asian Kid: It means go fuck yourself.

According to Wikipedia, ching chong and ching chang chong are pejorative terms sometimes employed by speakers of English to mock or play on the Chinese language, people of Chinese ancestry, or other East Asians perceived to be Chinese. But I certainly don’t think for one moment that Oliver was using the words in this pejorative sense. Perhaps Oliver, or some other member ‘in the know’, can enlighten us.

[colmx]

ching Chong is slang for taking a pee (urinating)

[francois]

colmx, that is what I thought ching-chong meant, much the same as pee-pee. I understand that chee would be a more typical usage.

[Jellybean]

ching Chong is slang for taking a pee (urinating)

Ah, I see. Thanks for clearing up the mystery colmx.

I am familiar with the Thai word, chìi to urinate, but have never heard anyone use the word chíng-chòng. I asked my Thai teacher the meaning of the word this morning. She laughed and said it is the word Thai children use instead of chìi. And, as François said above, it is the English equivalent of, peepee or another word I recall from childhood, wee-wee. She did add that some adults may also use the word just as some western adults may also use the word peepee as a replacement for the harsher and, in some circles, more vulgar word, piss.

It's great to see that all the great issues of the day are discussed on the forum.

:D

[Oliver]

I recommend a book I bought a few years ago in Pattaya...."Thai for gay travellers". Useful for all slang but specifically slang used by gay Thais.

[Oliver]

https://www.amazon.com/Thai-Gay-Tourists-Language-Thailand/dp/1887521119

[kittyboy]

IMHO American are no more and no less unpleasant than most travelers.

[Blueskytoday]

quite a bit of bashing americans...gee,,like everyone else in every country is fine to talk to...give me a break..

[werner]

Thanks to everyone for the interesting comments.

I did NOT mean to bash Americans. I have many American friends, and in my youth, I had an American lover.
I will stop being a snotty, cantankerous European and try to be friendly to chatty Americans.

Talking with my own countrymen or with other Europeans is sometimes more difficult than talking to Americans. I am Swiss, and my native language is French. Many Swiss are more or less fluent in several languages. When I meet a Swiss person whose native language is [Swiss] German, should we speak in French or in German? If I meet a Swiss person whose native language is Italian, should I try to speak in my not-totally-fluent Italian, or force him to speak French? If I meet a Dutch-speaking Belgian, should I speak in French, which he has certainly studied, but might not want to speak? Or should we talk in English. If we speak in English, he might even think that I am an American [God forbid!], because I can speak English with an American accent.

Ugh....No wonder Europeans are reserved and Americans are chatty......

[francois]

I will stop being a snotty, cantankerous European and try to be friendly to chatty Americans.

.

Bravo ! But if any of those chatty Americans try to chat with you, just reply in your best French or wurst German and they will leave you alone.

[Steve1903]

Well I don't mind folk having a chat. Rather enjoy hearing about folk from other places. More of a listener than a talker myself.
Personally I'd rather speak to a self absorbed Yank than a drunken Brit.