Meeting Thai Men, The Proving Grounds

[bucknaway]

I'm just making conversation and sharing my thoughts. Feel free to offer you own insight on your own Thai man experiences.

I'm due to return to Thailand in September. I was just there in April so that may be part of the reason I am not so excited about this trip. Don't misunderstand, I want to go but I am not sitting on pins and needles as the date approaches if only because it now seem so routine and familiar to me. To help me get out of my Thailand vacation rut, I have plans to spend a good portion of my trip with a poster from this board and we plan to visit Pattaya, Chiang Mai and Bangkok. His boyfriend will be coming along so it will be the 3 of us traveling around together but will be staying in separate rooms
As I
It's our hope to meet guys and have fun and see some sights along the way. As we talked of our plans it is obvious that we have extreme differences in our preferences when it comes to meeting guys. I prefer the internet whereas he prefers to meet them in a social setting be it a gogo, a bar or a massage house.

I like to meet the guys on the internet because they tend to out perform hired fun and stick around for more after the first orgasm. With a guy found in a gogo bar or massage place is more focused on time and money and are often done and ready to leave once either of you spill your seed.... Sure the hired guy can sometimes have all the right stuff, but the online guys can give them a run for their baht!

This is my preference for meeting guys in Thailand.

1. Online. I like meeting guys on the social media sights because I can learn what they like and they can learn what I like. We can also decide if we are meeting for just sex or sex and friendship or just friendship. Often when the sex is done the encounter is not over. To this day, many of my friends in Thailand are the friends I have met through social media.

* Social. Meeting guy through introduction or by chance on the street. This is possibly my favorite way to meet guys in Thailand but I try to size up the situation keeping in mind that I am a butterfly and not interested in dating or a relationship.

2. Disco. I have had some of my hottest sexual encounters with guys I have met at DJ station, Boat Bar in Phuket and G.O.D. in Bangkok! Those encounters have ranged from quickie sex with a guy that spoke no English who tipped me for sex (Back when I was much younger) to that of a 3 way with a Hot Thai Couple and a special memory of sex in a SUV on a Phuket beach with a hot Indian guy and those are just the few that stay at the front of my memory..

2a. Pattaya Beach Massage guy (Special Mention). I have had nothing but fun times with the Pattaya massage guys. When I find one that I like a lot, I ask for them to finish the massage in my room which always leads to satisfaction.

3. Sauna. I enjoy the cat and mouse game of the sauna but I am not sure if I like sex in a sauna. Sure I have a lot of sex there but I don't think it is satisfying sex. Sex in a sauna is fun but empty but I enjoy it enough to make it my #3 pick for meeting guys in Thailand.

3. Bars. Be it the Telephone or the like. I often get to meet a nice guy there. Seldom does my meeting a guy in a bar bring about immediate sex. It often happens after 2 or 3 meetings but they all seem to develop into lasting associations.

4. Gogo bar. There was a time that I would have ranged GOGO bars as #1 or #2 but now I don't appreciate them as much as I once did. Sure I enjoy visiting the bars and sitting with the guys but it's seldom that I will off anyone for sex. When I was younger the guys tended to stay longer and the sex was fun. Now the sex with gogo guys seems more commercial. There are exceptions to that.... There is one Pattaya gogo guy that made me smile every time i saw his face.

5. Massage House Guys. Not my favorite. Anymore, if I am getting a massage, I am there for the massage and the massage alone. In the past I use to have fun with the massage shop guys but anymore i don't find sex with them very satisfying.

6. Host bar. I have been to the Pattaya host bars. I have never offed any of the guys for sex but I do spend time with them. A few guys I have met online worked at some of the host bars in Johmtien.

Well... That is my preference as of this moment. It could change depending on the situation and the guy.

[Smiles]

Can't help you at all Buck. We approach from opposite sois: you a Butterfly, me a LongTermer.
But I very much enjoyed your well-thought-out ruminations on The Chase (I recall it slightly), and am looking forward to the reactions from the butterfly masses. Obviously they represent the larger defined gaggle on this board.

I am especially interested in the replies from those who are primarily attracted to the brave new world of internet connections - sexual or otherwise - as you seem to be.
I have mentioned here recently that the entire social media leaves my stone cold and rolling my eyeballs with abandon, even horror (being taken to strict task for that!): but happily acknowedge being a bit of a dinosaur in that milieu.

I also will be back in September. Perhaps I shall witness some of your shenanigans, educationally of course.

Looking forward to ....

But we CAN look forward to The Look can we bucknaway??

[bucknaway]

But we CAN look forward to The Look can we bucknaway??

A guy never knows what will stick in the craw of others. I wonder what it is about my post that still sticks with you months later? Maybe its all in fun? Jealousy, trolling or just can't forget me like some can't forget Windsong?

The Thread/Post that stuck in Brisbane's craw.... ( drive-update-t30591-15.html?hilit=drive%20by%20update (http://sawatdeenetwork.com/forum/drive-update-t30591-15.html?hilit=drive%20by%20update) )
:ymhug: It's kinda nice knowing that my posts are making memories for the membership :x

[youtube:u6ybibco]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P7F-dulMPmk[/youtube:u6ybibco]

[bucknaway]

Can't help you at all Buck. We approach from opposite sois: you a Butterfly, me a LongTermer.
But I very much enjoyed your well-thought-out ruminations on The Chase (I recall it slightly), and am looking forward to the reactions from the butterfly masses. Obviously they represent the larger defined gaggle on this board.

I am especially interested in the replies from those who are primarily attracted to the brave new world of internet connections - sexual or otherwise - as you seem to be.
I have mentioned here recently that the entire social media leaves my stone cold and rolling my eyeballs with abandon, even horror (being taken to strict task for that!): but happily acknowedge being a bit of a dinosaur in that milieu.

I also will be back in September. Perhaps I shall witness some of your shenanigans, educationally of course.

Looking forward to ....

It would be one of my great pleasures in life to meet you when I am in Thailand. You do know that I think of you as an old friend who I met in our old neighborhood that was the Gay Pattaya forum. Not many of us still around and still posting.

As far as being a butterfly... I try to hide my actions in the light of day... I don't want to seem like a slut :D

[joe552]

I've always preferred the "boyfriend" experience on my holidays. This year, I chatted with a guy on GayRomeo for a couple of months before my trip, and I wasn't disappointed when we met. We stayed together for the 2 weeks of my holidays. We still talk a few times a week, and I would be happy to spend my next holiday with him. He introduced to me to a few people I wouldn't normally get to meet, so it was all good.

[bucknaway]

The friend that I'm going to hang out with asked me how many guys I agree to meet with online and how do I handle it. I told him I agree to meet them all and once I'm in Thailand I let it play out naturally. So e days I may meet many guys from online and other days I may meet none. It's also common to meet guys in a social setting only to be told that they know me from online.....

But you're lucky to have a guy that is not the jealous type.

[Impulse]

You remind us just how many ways there are to hook up in LOS.

I would put your last pick, Host bars, up to my first or second spot with go-go bars. I'm like Joe and enjoy the bf experience. Host bars are great for this. Go go's more for the quick sex but the real stunners can more likely be found there.

I would put online as my third choice, as like host bars, the bf experience can be had there. My last bf experience from that was crazy jealous guy who ruined my trip with his bs. Note to self: make sure he understands I'm butterfly and not looking for long term boyfriend.

Saunas don't like. I guess I don't feel comfy walking around half naked. Although I had fond memories in them in New York back in the 80s when I would go with my very promiscuous bf. He was 17 when I met him, I was 23. But he ended up teaching me a thing or two, poppers, saunas, and the weird and wild clubs of the city. Fun times, anyway I'm glad to hear your going back next month, look forward to hearing about it all.

I would put online as my third choice, as like host bars, the bf experience can be had there. My last bf experience from that was crazy jealous guy who ruined my trip with his bs. Note to self: make sure he understands I'm butterfly and not looking for long term boyfriend.One of the first questions a boy asks is "Do you have a boyfriend?" I always answer "Yes, he's in Surin at the moment." It sets the tone and the expectations. Plus it's code for "I like Isaan boys" and since they're most often from there you're off to a good start.

I must add that I don't have a boyfriend. I am a butterfly.

[catawampuscat]

I'll stretch Buckys invite to relate meeting Thai boys to my recent experience
meeting a Japanese boy in Pattaya. On a recent deadly quiet night in Sunee Plaza,
I sat at down with the owner of Allofme and a slim young Japanese man. We had a nice
chat and the Japanese man spoke English well.
After a while we all parted ways and I ventured into Eros, which had few customers but
plenty of friendly frisky boys.
When I left Eros, I ran into the Japanese man again just outside Eros,
and told him that there were many hot boys inside Eros. He replied that he didn't like
young boys but liked old farangs. He embraced me and I was stunned and flustered.
He said "I like you, I want you."
He looked fine, is 32, slim and looked like a college student.

Unlike Bucky, this didn't happen to me everyday and an offer not involving baht from
a young guy just shocked me.
Preferring an over the hill farang to young sweet Thais was amazing.
This happened in the last week and goes to show, you never know.

[Jellybean]

Thumbs up to you catawampuscat. You must have looked like the cat that got the cream.

And no doubt you did afterwards! :ymparty:

[joe552]

Great story, catawampuscat, shows there's hope for all of us ageing farang.

[netrix]

I agree with Bucky's list ... except I've only been to a sauna once in Thailand. It was kinda hot and plenty of fun
but not my thing I guess. If it's too dark to see who's grabbing me and pulling me into some dark corner it loses
some of its excitement for me.

Living here online is definitely number 1. Then friends of friends / discos. I've met a few massage guys online
and then went to meet them -- but I'm not crazy about going to a massage place if I don't know any of the guys.
If there's only 2 or 3 guys and I'm not attracted to any of them it's not gonna be much more than just a massage
so it's not a fav place for meeting guys.

[christianpfc]

A very interesting subject, and I couldn't have covered it better (although you need to distinguish free or paid sex and Bangkok and Pattaya or abroad).

When I was in Europe, online was number one (as there was no other choice), but now it moved to the last place.

While contact is easily made, actual meeting (place, time), is extremely difficult (I am looking for unpaid encounters). Examples I posted in the forums and on my blog are just the tip of the iceberg. And let's not forget you have to sift through heaps of profiles with poor pictures and deal with time wasters, or money request far too late in the conversation. Words like "abysmal" and "horrible" are needed to describe my experiences in online dating.

I can extend this to all electronic communications, as I said before:

It is often easier to meet someone new (paid or free), than meeting someone you know already again. (E.g. this year two cases of lost phones or changed phone numbers, would like to meet again but cannot contact the boy any more - ask for additional contact data, email, facebook.)

As I am writing this (21:37 Bangkok), I am waiting for a friend who wanted to come to my room at 8 pm, now he is in Sanam Luang and waiting for the bus, while I am in Sathorn, earliest possible time to be in my room is 22:30. The usual bullshit: can I come and pick him up? I did so before, one time (it sounded like an emergency), but now have a principle of not picking up boys to take them back to my room. He can come by taxi or bus (I will pay), but I don't go to pick him up. He is not the first to suggest such thing.

To be fair, I managed to train one boy to meet me at a reasonable place and time of my choice, in time. But it took a while, and there were throwbacks!

My current favorites for free sex is sauna and for paid sex massage. Sauna is not a good place to look for sexual partners (too dark; but I like underwear days), nor to have sex; but you know it's immediately and free. For massage I have two regulars.

Gogo bars and host bars. I go to those in Pattaya (once per month, for a few days) and frequent several such venues and take boys. In Bangkok close too zero, too expensive.

Discos and bars, I go often, but not much success recently.

Within the last 12 months, I had 4 encounters in real life. I am out and around a lot, so I am bound to cross paths with other gay boys, then you have to recognize mutual interest and chat a few words and exchange phone numbers. I regarded such reports as urban myths, because I didn't have any such encounters the first 4 years I came to Thailand and coulnd't see it happen from the experience gathered in that time, but now 4 cases in 12 months.

[AsDaRa]

What websites do your guys use for meeting boys online in Pattaya?

[Smiles]

" ... I managed to train one boy ..."
A philosophy?

[christianpfc]

The boy from yesterday, around 22:30 I couldn't reach him on the phone, so I gave up and went to Saranrom instead (success). Just finished with the boy from Saranrom, my original date calls me, so I make a quick return to my room. I don't ask him where he was, he doesn't ask me where I was. Finally meet 00:30 (4 h 30 min late; but from reading his facebook I should have guessed that he won't be on time).

Today another boy, 1 h 30 min late (but efficient communication, calls me 10 minutes before appointment to tell me he will be late; usually I call the boy 30 min after appointment to ask where he is).

I can plan accordingly (how to spend the waiting time, or what else to do in the area), and now live here; but when such delays happen to you as a tourist, it can really screw your plans or waste your time (and did so for me on earlier holidays!).

These two cases are boys I have met before, with boys I haven't met before it can be much worse.

Therefore my current, light activity on gayromeo and grindr is only to watch the market or stay in contact.

But to be fair, I met three boys from grindr in the last months, efficient communication in good English and acceptable delays, all of them I consider boyfriend material for someone else, but they are not so much my type.