Tipping boy to go to disco

[daa raa]

How much would you tip a boy that you off to go to the disco? The boy will only go to the disco and there will be no sex.

[firecat69]

Is he a Bar Boy? Are you offing him?? Will friends meet him there?? Many things go into the answer. I think it could vary from 0-700 and should always be up to him. If he doesn't want to tell you then you tell him in advance and ask if it is ok.

[daa raa]

Yes, he works in gogo bar. There will be several others going and some are his friends. I think you are correct, ask the boy how much he wants before offing him.

[Halfhansum]

No offence intended, but why would you off a boy just to go to a disco ???
:scratch

[a447]

So, he wants you to take him to the disco and pay for everything? If that is the case, you should not need to pay him anything. You are already paying for his, and possibly his friends', night out.

I think the key phrase was "How much would you tip a boy that you off to go to the disco"?

If we ( for whatever reason) off the guy then he's entitled to his tip as we are then wiping out the chance of him being off'd by another (tipping) customer for that night, if however it was just a case of him saying to you "any chance of offing me so I can go to the disco with my mates and you can come too if you want" they that might be a different thing I guess.

Ha shit on typing that I've "just" remembered that exact thing happened me when I was in Neals bar the other week !

I and one of his guys were going on out from the bar with several of the guys (not working) friends to a club and one of the other go go guys in Neals place who had been sitting drinking with us was about to be left sitting on his own and I asked his was he not going which of course he said he couldn't as he was "working" so I immediately said "bugger that, come on with your mates" and off'd him with my guy which he was delighted about and we all took off.

So, we all went out and had a great (very drunken he he) night out, but I have to say that as the night progressed and got more and more messy with everyone fairly hammered ( well the Thai guys anyway) it never even entered my head about "tipping" him ! lol so I've just totally contradicted myself there !!

To be fair however I don't honestly think it had entered his head either nor was he expecting or waiting for me too, also I think both from his and my body language that it was obvious that we all were just out for laugh and he knew he wasn't expected to go back with me / us etc. HA I'm just "hoping" that I read that right then or my card will undoubtedly be well and truly marked now as the cheap Charlie who doesn't tip after offing !! lol (ha ha I'm sure that WASN'T the case though as i've spoken to him on GR since leaving to say Hi and he was very friendly and appreciative of getting a night out with his mates and all being able to demolish TWO litres of whiskey in a very short space of time - at least I "THINK" anyway ! OOOPPS ! lol )

[firecat69]

I bet you have it exactly right. Some times it is nice just to give the boys a night out, no sex expected and no tip expected. They are after all boys who enjoy a good time but rarely can afford that type of time unless someone else is paying. If you can stand the late night and the usual having to stand , it is a really fun night with the boys that many of us take for granted. (including myself)

[Neal]

Always get it correct and out front what the deal is first. A quick story.
I ised to be approached by three wht I would refer to as good friends from one of the bars which I will leave un-named. They always came around and sat with me in front of the Ambiance Hotel, have a few beers and whine and whine about how they did not want to get offed. I would ask if they wanted to go with me to eat and I would pay their off so that they did not have to work. Several months later there was a party, actually it was mt=y birthday and I asked them if they wanted to go to the party. We had reserved a club. Well to say the least I could see on the looks of their faces that something was really wrong. Finally one blurted out, "you take us off all the time and you no give us tip! What we supposed to pay rent and eat with!?" Well you could have knocked me over with a feather. You come out of your bar and ask me to take you and save you from working. We go to have dinner and then you want a tip also??!! I said well fuck you! Go to work! Who needs to do all of this cause you don't want to go to work and then I shell out money also? Well I am still freinds with one but I have to tell you that all the MB's I have run into tell me the same thing...... give them gold, a phone a new motorbike a business to make money? All that is good but how much cash you give me when we are done?? So if you don't want to part with the extras don't. Remember they are looking for cash at the end, the other was BONUS!

[anonone]

A very unique situation each time when it comes to these types of "outings". First, kudos to you for recognizing the tip potential and trying to do the right thing.

Most of my disco / club trips start at the end of the bar night, once everything is closing up. There is no chance for a customer for the bar boys. The trips are seen more like a fun time with their friends after work, just like in any culture. There are several factors to consider though, beyond the time of night. If you only invite one or two boys, it is more like work to them and a tip might be appropriate. A large group of friends, with you tagging along, is more like fun for them. It also makes a difference if you have a prior friendship with them. If you are a "regular" at the bar and have a good rapport, it is different then you walking into a bar cold and offing 4 guys for a party.

One thing I have done as a middle ground is to offer everyone in the group a hundred baht when leaving (done rather discretely outside the club...) as taxi money or to get a late night meal.

My trips are infrequent and I always have my BF with me, so that also tends to make a difference.

Prior to having my BF, I had a situation where I was chatting up a guy for some time in the bar. The brilliant idea hit to go to the disco at closing time. A group went and had a great time, but a lot to drink. I ended up not having sex with guy and we all went our separate ways from the disco, but I totally neglected to tip him at all. I felt pretty bad about it the next day so I stopped by the bar early the next evening and gave him a nice tip and apologized for not thinking of it last night. He was surprised enough that I am not sure he was expecting a tip at all, but it made a big impression on him (and the other bar boys). It is now one of my favorite places and I am treated very well there.

[Impulse]

I would make it clear that you are not going to tip him, it's just an off so he can get away from the bar and enjoy himself a bit. Not hard to tell him this.

I met a guy I had know from a couple years ago in a host bar. He didn't interest me anymore sexually..but we got along well and he made me laugh a lot. I took him to a couple bars and he spent the night with me...no sex(it was my night off). I tipped him 1,000 baht and as he was leaving he told me someone had stolen his wallet and he needed money for rent :crybaby: . He was used to me tipping him more and was expecting more. I felt he had an easy night off with no sex so what I tipped him was enough. I just ignored him. I had many drinks with him at his bar the remainder of my trip but I should have made it clear that we were not having sex and just visiting a few bars.

[joe552]

I think I agree with rocket on this one - but it needs to be made clear at the start that there will be no tip - you're paying his off fee so he can have time with his friends. but it can be a minefield.

[Neal]

Yes, I was young and inexperienced in those days and just had never thought about it until I was hit with it. I never did take them to dinner again and let them sit in the room and play MP3 with no sex!

[vnman]

Same situation.

I saw a very good looking guy in a GOGO but didn't want to take him off that night, I had something planned with friends. He could speak very good English. We had a drink and I told him that I wanted to off him the next day. Of course, they hear that all the time but get a lot of empty promises. He agreed but seemed disappointed. So, I called over the mamasan and paid his "off" for the next day. Then asked for his phone number, and gave him mine. We agreed that he would just come to my apartment the following day and we agreed on a time. When I left I gave him 300 baht.

That same night, not sure about the time but surely after his bar was closed, he called me and asked me what I was doing. I told him that I was clubbing with some friends and he asked if he could join us. I said "yes" and he joined us with two of his friends. When the club closed I was drunk and tired and wanted to go home. I said goodbye to my friends and to him and his friends and he didn't seem to understand what was going on. I was drunk and I didn't really understand why he was confused. Maybe he want to come home with me, or maybe he wanted me to give him some money.

This leads back to another thread about feeling guilty. Why on earth should I feel guilty about this situation? I was very clear that I didn't want a date that night. He asked me to join me at the club and had a free night of boozing with his friends. The problem is that there are two different logics at work. My logic, that most of you will share, and his logic that I will never understand.

He didn't show up the next day and I didn't bother to call him or get my money back from the bar. A wasted opportunity for him and me because I really liked him and my tip from the previous day could/should have told him that I wasn't stingy. His logic probably told him that I was.

My advice: there's nothing wrong with clarifying the deal on for hand and always state the obvious.

[Impulse]

Maybe they think that we enjoy their company so much that we should always tip them....no matter how little they do. Who knows?...some might get off all night just watching them play video games.

[Neal]

I just don't know but his and their logic is that they are spending time with us and the falang is having a good time because we are in their "company". That it matters not if there is sex or not and so over the last 2 or 3 years, I am very very careful as to what I say and where I take them and know what they will be expecting. No presents just money now. Their loss.

On another note I have a freind that sits and talks to me all the time when he is in town. To try to help one kid he took him off many times and the boy convinced him to buy all the suppies and space to put a noodle stand. y understanding is that he spent abou 40,000 baht in all. I don't know. anyway the kid was upset because while he appreciated the noodle stand, "he no give me money!" How I pay my rent and for food for me and family?" I replied, you work now and make money!
Give them a 5 baht necklace for about 125,000 b. Thats cool but where is the money??!! Nope they now get only the money.

[bucknaway]

Have you ever talked to a Thai guy that is not a moneyboy about some of your moneyboy troubles? They(some) have little sympathy for the gogo boys and even less sympathy for the beggars who focus their begging on tourists.

One of my friends told me they once employed a homeless girl who who only worked 2 days while her boyfriend waited outside the office from the time she started work till she got off from work. After her two days of work she never came back not even to get her pay for two days work.

But my own personal view of the working guys is just that. They are working in a bar to get my attention to earn an off and to be compensated with a tip that is worth their time and effort. I would do them no favor to remove them from work only to feed them drinks and snacks with carfare home when they were hoping to earn money to help pay their rent. I may think I am helping them by letting them enjoy them-self in a dance club but I am sure they would rather be at the club with their friends on their own because while they are there with me they are on the clock and working.

[ikarus]

I agree with DaBoss on this one. You need to make everything clear before the off. I usually pay 500 baht (but I suspect 300
would be O'K) to go to disco (no sex). If it happens to be a Gay boy, usually later some friends from the bar join in (but it is up them and they are not paid). Once I had a bizzare experience. I had an extra VIP ticket to Tiffany show and I decided to off a boy just to go with me. It was one of those days when most of the bars were closed. So, I had no choice and stopped by one (quite well -known) bar in Boystown. I picked a good looking boy and made an offer (500 just to see Tiffany show
and no sex) and was told that it is not enough. Well, I wasted my extra ticket...

Wow - talk about him playing hard to get eh ! I was just sitting thinking about that and couldn't work out as to whether that was because it was just coming up to rent day etc ( and he REALLY needed a big tipper to get him through paying his rent) OR that it was just AFTER rent day and he couldn't care less about making the 500 baht so just didn't bother going - either way - silly boy as I'm sure like all good looking Thai boys he could have easily turned the 500 into 800 in a blink with some sob story lol plus got a good night out out of it as well .

Or maybe he just hated the Tiffany show plus no boy I've been with has ever been there of course or seen ANYTHING for that matter in Pattaya lol - as when you ask them "maybe we go Tiffany ?" - "oh I never been" is the reply - or "maybe we go cinema, have you been" - "no never" - or maybe we go beach/ bowling/ elephants, have you been ? "no never been" - or maybe we go been shopping -" OH ( as the eyes light up) no one ever take me shopping in such LONG time, you a very good heart!" - you'd think to hear them they'd been chained to the go go stage for a year lol - and of course all they do whilst out at those places with you is say Hi to all the staff whom they meet that they obviously know very well from being there every few days ha ha :-) - ah bless 'em :-)

In past few trips i took my bf to both cinemas and Tifany show and he loved both

[anonone]

Great post NIrish Guy. I love it...very true.

And I love the network the guys have put together. Go to the disco or open a bottle somewhere with a couple of guys, and it is like the bat signal goes out. Friends just seem to show up out of nowhere for the festivities.

??? What do you mean it's "like" the bat signal goes out !! - have you not watched when the guys say " i go toilet" that they then nip outside into the car park and using the small torch that they carry for reading check bins in the bar they then flick a small switch on it and it instantly projects a huge "S F " ( for stupid farang) and a Baht sign right onto the clouds and thus attracts every Thai guy within a two mile radius to come and emtpy your whiskey bottle until it's done at whish stage they all leave - only then to look up again on their way out to locate where their next poor unsuspecting SF is drinking and so head that way for bottle number two ! - you really mustn't be paying enough attention in these places if you missed all that subtle Thai action going on ! lol :-)

[colmx]

DaBoss:
I think that a lot of your experiences in this thread can be chalked down to the fact that you have a preference for straight boys

Straight Boys are pure MoneyBoys. Full stop. For them its a job and probably one they don't find very pleasant.

I have found Gay boys on the other hand, not to be so money motivated..

Sure some of them are money grabbing leeches, others are "looking for love" leeches, others are desperate for money to buy ice or pay rent
But a lot of the Pattaya gay boys are just in it for the fun
As long as they are enjoying themselves, decent music, decent company and the whiskey and food is still flowing they are happy

As for my own experiences with offing people to go to a disco:
When i off someone, 90% of the time the only thing i ask is "go disco, ok?"
If he is enthusiastic an off soon follows and off we go

If he is unenthusiastic it is usually down to the fact that he is disinterested/has plans already or can't get in because he is under 20
100B to the head doorman usually ensures that a boy under 20 (in the company of a farang) can get into the disco... so that issue can be quite easily solved
The disinterested guy gets left behind!

At the end of the night - if things don't work out with the offed boy e.g. He is nasty/boring/drunk or he wants to go home early when the rest of us are still enjoying the disco I would usually give them 600 (100 for MoCy + 500 tip)

Obviously if we click then he comes back to the room for more

On the other hand - if the guy is not offed and is just tagging along, or begged to be brought to the disco and is following friends I would never tip them.
Might pay for their taxi to wherever we will go to eat after the disco... and for their food or sometimes for a shirt on the way to the disco.... but thats about it...

Anyone demanding money would certainly not get another invite (and i issue a lot of invites!)

[joe552]

well colmx, I for one really appreciate your post. Given your experience, I'd feel happy following your rules. Makes it a bit easier for me to negotiate this particular minefield. Thanks.

[anonone]

When I hear the Thai guys say that, I usually follow them to the toilet. Old habit from the T&T days....lots of fun. :laughing3:

I guess I really should pay more attention to the subtleties. In my defense, I am usually distracted by the not-so-subtle Thai activities that are more interesting to me... :sign5:

Colmx: Quite agree that for the gay guys, the night out of fun can be enough and no tips expected. I have even had them try to pay for some of the later check bins (extra ice, mixer, etc) which always makes me feel good, even though I always make it my treat.

By the way, thanks for the tip / reminder about the under 20 restriction for the disco. Totally forgot about that. It might explain some previous experiences....

[vnman]

I always thought that the 20 restriction was more a Bangkok problem.

[martin911]

If i take off a guy/guys from a bar to go clubbing with him/them but where there is no sex involved i dont pay any money apart from offering 100 b for Taxi fare home (which is usually refused ) --

I usually only take off guys like this if he was a friend of another guy who was in my company --

And as in Colmxs case these boys would be Gay boys ,not the more money orientated straight boys

And i have never been asked to pay anything more than that!!!!-

--but as in my case we are going to go out to clubs -which by the nature of them are late nite starts-and the boys bar is getting nearer to closing time --so the boys (apart from having fun for the nite )are getting an extension to their own opening hours as the clubs offer them anther opp to hook up !!

[anonone]

One of the discos in Pattaya was recently busted with a lot of under 20s found inside. Might make it a bit tougher for the under 20s to gain entry for a bit, though I doubt it is insurmountable if you really want one to go.

Last trip (a couple weeks ago), all Thai friends had ID checked upon entry into NAB. I offered mine, but they didn't seem interested :sign5:
Everyone happened to be 20 and up, so no idea how difficult it would have been otherwise.

When I took a group of 9 to Dave, I don't think anyone checked IDs, but wouldn't swear to it.

[Shuee]

most of the time if you ask them i off you just for disco their faces light up with enthusiasm, yes its 500bt from me & they are happy. Its a winning situation for them, they dont have to stay in the bar all night foot shuffling from side to side, & can have fun at the disco, they get a tip from the bar for being offed & a tip from you!

[vnman]

Is there anything wrong with the boys in the clubs themselves?

[jaydonny]

Is there anything wrong with the boys in the clubs themselves?

Do anyone go to such as NAB on their own and meet up with boys in the club... ?

i would feel shy to turn up on my own with a table on my own cos its not like say Dj station...

jay.

[bucknaway]

I love going places alone in Thailand. I get to meet others on holiday as well as friendly Thai's and I am also a shy guy when away from the internet.

[vnman]

Is there anything wrong with the boys in the clubs themselves?

Do anyone go to such as NAB on their own and meet up with boys in the club... ?

i would feel shy to turn up on my own with a table on my own cos its not like say Dj station...

jay.

Yeah, I didn't think about that. I guess DJ and GOD are exceptions. People tend to go in groups. Same here in VN. Too bad because, it takes away the fun of cruising. Having a table full of boys has a disadvantage too. Other boys wont be likely to approach you when you're already in company of a couple of others.

[martin911]

Its no prob going to Nab or Dave on your own -- you wont be stuck for company in either --- There are loads of coyotes working in both clubs and they will spot a single farang at a 100 paces and flock to your table !!!!!
Which will then give you a bit of time to get your bearings and see what takes your fancy in the rest of the club !!!

[vnman]

That doesn't sound unlogical Martin. I must admit that I don't remember which club is which, name wise, but I do remember the coyote boys. They always behaved like gogo boys with an attitude. Maybe something for a new thread.