A little too much "up to you" attitude?

[cdnmatt]

Let's see if we can generate some interesting stories here. We all knows most Thais have very much have a "up to you" approach to life. Does it ever cause you problems, or get irritating at all? Kim very much has that attitude, and these days it tends to sometimes get on my nerves a little.

For example, we're living close to a wat these days, so there's monks all over the place. At first I tried to confirm with Kim that I'm not supposed to look monks in the eye, and of course, I got the typical "mai bpen rai, up to you" response. A couple days later, after getting a few "what the fuck are you doing?" stares after inadvertently making eye contact, I bluntly questioned him again about it. This time I got a small nod out of him, letting me know it's rude.

The worst was when we headed to the moo-baan to meet his mom for the first time. I confirmed with him that I'm supposed to wai his mom, and of course, out came "Noooo, mai bpen rai, up to you. No problem, mama not care.". Then of course, his mom wasn't exactly pleased when instead of a wai, she got a smile, nod, and one-handed wave. Gee, thanks honey...

Same goes with learning Thai. Apparently, the entire Thai language is up to me too. I'm not sure if he's too lazy to correct me, or if he just doesn't like telling me I'm wrong. When he can't understand what I'm saying though, alot of times he'll simply look at the Thai script in whatever book I'm learning from to figure out what I'm saying. Then instead of correcting me, he'll simply remember whatever new word I just made up, and go with that from then on in. I guess he thinks that's a much better method, then actually teaching me correct pronounciation.

How about you? Any stories?

[Beachlover]

Apparently, the entire Thai language is up to me too.

Hehehe... the first two instances with the monk and his Mum are funny but this one cracks me up.

I think now, you have to explain to him it's important he gives you honest feedback... not vague tip toes. Otherwise you both end up unhappy.

He sounds cute.

Sounds like you have a real winner on his hands. He obviously doesn't care whether or not you make a fool of yourself. What does he care about? Let's see...I'll give you one guess.

[cdnmatt]

Sounds like you have a real winner on his hands. He obviously doesn't care whether or not you make a fool of yourself. What does he care about? Let's see...I'll give you one guess.

Well, it's been 9 months, so I can guarantee it's not purely money, that's for sure. He's proven that more than enough to me now, for me to not doubt him anymore.

Honestly, I just think it's the social hierarchy doing its thing. For example, in school in Canada, if the teacher is out of line, the students are allowed to call him/her out, and if warranted, the teacher gets disciplined. In Thailand, that's basically forbidden though. The teacher can hit you all day long with his stick if he wants, if you don't know the answer, and you're not allowed to say jack-shit.

Same goes with this, is my best guess. I'm older, I'm the guy who works everyday, and I'm the guy who makes all the money. So whatever I say is right, even if I am completely wrong. From my view, he's just being polite and respectful, and acting in the way he was brought up. Same as some young guy telling an older lady she's wrong, and doesn't understand what she's talking about. You just don't do that.

What does nine whole months have to do with anything? If he's in it for money, which I guarantee you he is, he's in it for the long run.

.... in school in Canada, if the teacher is out of line, the students are allowed to call him/her out, and if warranted, the teacher gets disciplined. In Thailand, ..the teacher can hit you all day long with his stick if he wants, if you don't know the answer, and you're not allowed to say jack-shit....


Now THAT'S the kind of education system we in the West ought to get back to.

"Spare the rod and spoil the child" I say

:occasion9: :occasion9:

[X] Experience is a dear teacher and fools learn by no other

[Thai Dyed]

Kim very much has that attitude, and these days it tends to sometimes get on my nerves a little.
How about you? Any stories?

How can you ignore the р╕┐30,000 per month you said you're giving him? I think it's the main theme of this story; the glue that holds it all together.

Living in the Boondocks, "monks running all over the place", mum pissed off that all she got was "a smile, nod, and one-handed wave" all makes it sound like this story may be coming to a close. Maybe if you palmed off р╕┐30,000 with your free hand while waving, it would have smoothed things over with the mother.

On top of that your history in Pattaya included death threats and extortion. Didn't this chapter begin with you running away from that? Maybe your next chapter will start with a move to a houseboat on the Mekong? Then when the inevitable occurs, you simply weigh anchor and push off for less troubled waters at least as far as the Mekong will take you.

It could read like Finnegans Wake with the first sentence as the end of the last sentence. "riverrun, past Eve and Adam's, from swerve of shore to bend of bay, brings us by a commodius vicus of recirculation back to [Pattaya] and Environs."

Don't forget your ATM card!
[attachment=0:2ipt650q]jjoyce.gif[/attachment:2ipt650q]

move to a houseboat on the Mekong?
Vientiane, Lao PDR, 26 February 2010 (mrcmekong.org)

READING EXERCISE FOR PROMISING BOYFRIEND MATERIAL

The cnuerrt wetar leevl on the mniatresam Moenkg Rveir is snfiiicaltngy bolew aervage in Nrorehtn Lao PDR and Tlinhaad. Lelevs at mtsaieanrm minaresug sonittas at Cnhaig Sean, Caihng Kahn, Laung Parbnag, Viiaetnne and Nnog Kahi are beolw thsoe taht oueccrrd in the low folw saseon of 1993, whcih floelwod the msot emertxe roianegl drhguot on rocred in 1992.

The iialtpcmions of tehse low wtear lelves are sireous for the plpeoe of Nteorhrn Lao PDR and Tianlhad. Sveree drouhgt wlil hvae an impcat on atrcuglirue, food setricuy, acsces to celan wtaer and rievr tsraorpnt and wlil acffet the eiocomnc dnepelvmoet of ppoele alardey fcniag siroeus pveorty. The nhtroern picvoners are aosgnmt the psreoot araes for btoh Lao PDR and Thlaanid.

Rveir tuor orrtpaeos hvae seoptpd oirneffg sveiecrs on the settcrh of rveir bewteen Hausieoy and Lunag Pabrang in Loas and it has been rrtpeoed taht Yaunn piirvnaocl attehuriois hvae hateld the oreitapon of Cihnese cgaro btoas wchih wlil acfeft riageonl tadre. The Naaointl Cnrete for Emtonninvearl Haelth and Waetr Splupy in Lao PDR has stteard aiidsnvg pploee to coetnur the eefctfs of dogrhut by runeicdg wtaer ctinoumospn.

move to a houseboat on the Mekong?
Vientiane, Lao PDR, 26 February 2010 (mrcmekong.org)

READING EXERCISE FOR PROMISING BOYFRIEND MATERIAL

The cnuerrt wetar leevl on the mniatresam Moenkg Rveir is snfiiicaltngy bolew aervage in Nrorehtn Lao PDR and Tlinhaad. Lelevs at mtsaieanrm minaresug sonittas at Cnhaig Sean, Caihng Kahn, Laung Parbnag, Viiaetnne and Nnog Kahi are beolw thsoe taht oueccrrd in the low folw saseon of 1993, whcih floelwod the msot emertxe roianegl drhguot on rocred in 1992.

The iialtpcmions of tehse low wtear lelves are sireous for the plpeoe of Nteorhrn Lao PDR and Tianlhad. Sveree drouhgt wlil hvae an impcat on atrcuglirue, food setricuy, acsces to celan wtaer and rievr tsraorpnt and wlil acffet the eiocomnc dnepelvmoet of ppoele alardey fcniag siroeus pveorty. The nhtroern picvoners are aosgnmt the psreoot araes for btoh Lao PDR and Thlaanid.

Rveir tuor orrtpaeos hvae seoptpd oirneffg sveiecrs on the settcrh of rveir bewteen Hausieoy and Lunag Pabrang in Loas and it has been rrtpeoed taht Yaunn piirvnaocl attehuriois hvae hateld the oreitapon of Cihnese cgaro btoas wchih wlil acfeft riageonl tadre. The Naaointl Cnrete for Emtonninvearl Haelth and Waetr Splupy in Lao PDR has stteard aiidsnvg pploee to coetnur the eefctfs of dogrhut by runeicdg wtaer ctinoumospn.


You do realise that, In England, you can now get an "A" level in English for displaying that level of proficiency.

Yes, apparently LMTU was class valedictorian.

[Thai Dyed]

READING EXERCISE FOR PROMISING BOYFRIEND MATERIAL

The cnuerrt wetar leevl on the mniatresam Moenkg Rveir is snfiiicaltngy bolew aervage in Nrorehtn Lao PDR and Tlinhaad. Lelevs at mtsaieanrm minaresug sonittas at Cnhaig Sean, Caihng Kahn, Laung Parbnag, Viiaetnne and Nnog Kahi are beolw thsoe taht oueccrrd in the low folw saseon of 1993, whcih floelwod the msot emertxe roianegl drhguot on rocred in 1992.

The iialtpcmions of tehse low wtear lelves are sireous for the plpeoe of Nteorhrn Lao PDR and Tianlhad. Sveree drouhgt wlil hvae an impcat on atrcuglirue, food setricuy, acsces to celan wtaer and rievr tsraorpnt and wlil acffet the eiocomnc dnepelvmoet of ppoele alardey fcniag siroeus pveorty. The nhtroern picvoners are aosgnmt the psreoot araes for btoh Lao PDR and Thlaanid.

Rveir tuor orrtpaeos hvae seoptpd oirneffg sveiecrs on the settcrh of rveir bewteen Hausieoy and Lunag Pabrang in Loas and it has been rrtpeoed taht Yaunn piirvnaocl attehuriois hvae hateld the oreitapon of Cihnese cgaro btoas wchih wlil acfeft riageonl tadre. The Naaointl Cnrete for Emtonninvearl Haelth and Waetr Splupy in Lao PDR has stteard aiidsnvg pploee to coetnur the eefctfs of dogrhut by runeicdg wtaer ctinoumospn.

I rather like this! But I'm a Joyce lover, so this is a mere bagatelle by comparison.

Here are the opening lines of Finnegans Wake which may help scottish-guy pass his "A" levels, and others with their reading comprehension:

riverrun, past Eve and Adam's, from swerve of shore to bend
of bay, brings us by a commodius vicus of recirculation back to
Howth Castle and Environs.
Sir Tristram, violer d'amores, fr'over the short sea, had passen-
core rearrived from North Armorica on this side the scraggy
isthmus of Europe Minor to wielderfight his penisolate war: nor
had topsawyer's rocks by the stream Oconee exaggerated themselse
to Laurens County's gorgios while they went doublin their mumper
all the time: nor avoice from afire bellowsed mishe mishe to
tauftauf thuartpeatrick: not yet, though venissoon after, had a
kidscad buttended a bland old isaac: not yet, though all's fair in
vanessy, were sosie sesthers wroth with twone nathandjoe. Rot a
peck of pa's malt had Jhem or Shen brewed by arclight and rory
end to the regginbrow was to be seen ringsome on the aquaface.
The fall (bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonner-
ronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoordenenth ur-
nuk!) of a once wallstrait oldparr is retaled early in bed and later
on life down through all christian minstrelsy. The great fall of the
offwall entailed at such short notice the pftjschute of Finnegan,
erse solid man, that the humptyhillhead of humself prumptly sends
an unquiring one well to the west in quest of his tumptytumtoes:
and their upturnpikepointandplace is at the knock out in the park
where oranges have been laid to rust upon the green since dev-
linsfirst loved livvy.

[Marsilius]

"Up to you" cuts, of course, two ways...

The boy means it, no doubt, to sound as if he only wants you to pay a sum of money that you consider reasonable - but in reality is hoping that you, delighted with his attitude, will pay above the odds.

But there is, of course, the danger that you will take him quite literally and choose to give him less even than he expects as a minimum.

Before my first trip to Thailand in 1993, I was advised by a friend of mine as to what the expected "going rate" for a short time experience might be. I should have remembered that (1) he was something of a cheapskate, (2) he himself had frequented only low-life venues in Pattaya (usually, in fact, the bargain basement outdoor cruising areas) where knock-down prices were the norm.

After I had arrived, a friend and I spent a few days in Bangkok and our first visit was to the Barbiery Bar - relatively upmarket at that time. We each selected a boy and then offed them for a foursome with the aforesaid "up to you" understanding. They were, as I now recognise, very high quality young men - of the sort of male model quality usually found in Thai gay porno magazines. It was all very enjoyable and, at the end of the encounter, we thought ourselves to be amazingly generous by handing over 300 baht to each of them [exchange rate in 1993 was 39 baht to the ┬г1]. We based that on aforesaid friend who had assured us that any sexual contact in Thailand would be absolutely delighted with just 200 baht!!!

We were thereupon assailed angrily - but in Thai, so we thought that there must be something else amiss other than our "generous" gifts - and pursued from the hotel until they finally gave up the chase. Of course, we soon discovered what our error had been - but by that time had left Bangkok and were never able to apologise or make it up to them.

But I suspect that we have not been the only ones to have - at least in this case inadvertently - caused grief by assuming that "up to you" could be taken quite literally!

[cdnmatt]

If he's in it for money, which I guarantee you he is, he's in it for the long run.

Well, gee... thank you for letting me know what he thinks, feels, how he views the world, and what his moral code is. Much appreciated! I think I know him a bit better than you though, but thanks for your insight.


all makes it sound like this story may be coming to a close

You've never been in a long-term, loving relationship before, have you? It'll take quite a bit more than a fucked up wai, and him not putting 110% effort into me learning Thai correctly for us to say good-bye to each other.


How can you ignore the р╕┐30,000 per month you said you're giving him? I think it's the main theme of this story; the glue that holds it all together.

That was like 7 months ago, when we couldn't even talk to each other due to the language barrier... things change.

Geez, and I was just trying to start a light-hearted thread... hoping to give some people a chuckle, and maybe get a chuckle out of other's stories. This is SGT though I guess.

If he's in it for money, which I guarantee you he is, he's in it for the long run.

Well, gee... thank you for letting me know what he thinks, feels, how he views the world, and what his moral code is. Much appreciated! I think I know him a bit better than you though, but thanks for your insight.

I've known him for over 25 years, you've only known him for nine months.

[Smiles]

" ... Geez, and I was just trying to start a light-hearted thread... hoping to give some people a chuckle, and maybe get a chuckle out of other's stories. This is SGT though I guess ... "
It is light hearted, but you just don't like the 'style' of the lightheartedness. That's Cdnmatt though, I guess.

OK, you want light hearted? He's my take.


Let's see if we can generate some interesting stories here. We all knows most Thais have very much have a "up to you" approach to life. Does it ever cause you problems, or get irritating at all? Kim very much has that attitude, and these days it tends to sometimes get on my nerves a little.

No, it will only cause problems (in your mind, not his) if you can't get beyond it.
It's not an 'up to you' approach to life ... he wants to please you but is still not sure how to do that: it's an approach to ~ not life, but your relationship ~ that says 'I'm happy if you're happy', so I'll do what makes you happy at every turn, therefore you decide what makes you happy (you have the power!), and I'll happily go along with that.
Making decisions 'together' is, in the west, a state of mind process which feels good to us, feels 'right', feels touchy-feely, warm and fuzzy. But Thais don't necessarily subscribe to that by nature ... they feel much more comfortable feeling good as long as their partner is feeling good, and don't give two hangs about a democratized/westernized decision-making process.
Seriously, for a guy who's decided to live in Thailand, with a new Thai partner, you have far too big a list of small things which get on your nerves. The list will grow ever longer, I'm sure.


For example, we're living close to a wat these days, so there's monks all over the place. At first I tried to confirm with Kim that I'm not supposed to look monks in the eye, and of course, I got the typical "mai bpen rai, up to you" response. A couple days later, after getting a few "what the fuck are you doing?" stares after inadvertently making eye contact, I bluntly questioned him again about it. This time I got a small nod out of him, letting me know it's rude.

How did you know you were getting a few "what the fuck are you doing" stares? Can you read a monk's mind ... or any Thai's mind? I rather doubt they thought that. I rather doubt they were even thinking about you.
I think you put an awful lot of psychic weight on other people's shoulders they probably don't carry, nor deserve. In Canada, we call it being a 'tight-ass'.
FYI: It's generally considered 'rude' to stare hard ~ or point at ~ any Thai person, not just monks.
Why would you 'stare' at a monk?

The worst was when we headed to the moo-baan to meet his mom for the first time. I confirmed with him that I'm supposed to wai his mom, and of course, out came "Noooo, mai bpen rai, up to you. No problem, mama not care.". Then of course, his mom wasn't exactly pleased when instead of a wai, she got a smile, nod, and one-handed wave. Gee, thanks honey...

Don't ask, just 'wai' if it's an older member of the immediate family ... the older, the better it is to wai. This is especially true if it's the very first time you've met. (See the thread on 'The Wai' down the page a bit).
How do you know she wasn't pleased? Did she scowl? Are you sure what appears to you to be a scowl in Thai is actually the same as a scowl in the west? Did she complain to her son? Did she scream at you? If none of these things, what makes you think she was displeased?

Same goes with learning Thai. Apparently, the entire Thai language is up to me too. I'm not sure if he's too lazy to correct me, or if he just doesn't like telling me I'm wrong. When he can't understand what I'm saying though, alot of times he'll simply look at the Thai script in whatever book I'm learning from to figure out what I'm saying. Then instead of correcting me, he'll simply remember whatever new word I just made up, and go with that from then on in. I guess he thinks that's a much better method, then actually teaching me correct pronounciation.

He can't be bothered. He's not interested in you speaking Thai. He doesn't understand why you'd be learning Thai. He's not a teacher. It's too difficult. Leave me be ... take Thai lessons.

How about you? Any stories?

[Thai Dyed]

[quote=Thai Dyed]all makes it sound like this story may be coming to a close

You've never been in a long-term, loving relationship before, have you? It'll take quite a bit more than a fucked up wai, and him not putting 110% effort into me learning Thai correctly for us to say good-bye to each other.


How can you ignore the р╕┐30,000 per month you said you're giving him? I think it's the main theme of this story; the glue that holds it all together.

That was like 7 months ago, when we couldn't even talk to each other due to the language barrier... things change.
[/quote:1hw7ophi]

You call 9 months a long-term relationship? Do you? You're even a bigger fool than I would have ever guessed.

So seven months ago you were giving your long-term lovey-dovey р╕┐30,000 each month. When you say "things change" do you mean to say you have given him a raise? We all know these payouts never go down, only up.

[Diec]

I don't understand what all this hoopla is about. I have been to many countries and I don't know every little nuance that if done wrong will set people off. I'm not Thai and if I'm not sure I should wai, I won't. If the Thai mother is upset over this then I feel it's her problem, she knows I'm not a native of her country and should understand a little faux paus. I mind my manners, smile a lot, do nice things for the family when I'm there, such as buy a center piece of flowers for the table at dinner time.

I think if people are kind, show a good heart, and be themselves, there is nothing wrong. If I look a monk in the eye and smile and he gets pissed about it, fuck him. I'm not Thai and will not pretend to be one. I understand Thai culture and do my best to abide and not be an oaf, but I feel they need to have a little acceptance of others culture as well.

As for Smiley thinking what ever makes me happy makes the boyfriend happy I feel is bullshit. The boyfriend has his own mind and a mouth, let him contribute as well.

You call 9 months a long-term relationship? Do you? You're even a bigger fool than I would have ever guessed.

You can ENTER a long-term relationship with someone and it can be a month, 3 months, 9 months, 15 years along. Matt clearly is indicating that he and Kim have entered into one. Besides, how can anyone decide what constitutes something so subjective as a long-term relationship, anyway??? I would guess that inter-cultural gay relationships of 9 months definitely are an accomplishment, by any measure.

I find the attitudes of commentators strange. For one, in second-guessing Matt's frame of mind and those of the monk, mom, and Kim you've actually engaged in what your yourself accuse Matt of- mind reading! For all you know, his interpretation could be entirely 100% correct... if you don't think Matt can judge, how in the world can you actually put yourself out there as having a better perspective from just reading his account? At least Matt was THERE.

I also wonder exactly WHY Matt has to bend over for KIM'S cultural quirks? Why can't Matt's Western vantage be just as legitimate? Or even better? Where's it written that Matt has to learn and act every single Thai cultural tenet or he's automatically wrong? How can it not be obvious to everyone pissing all over poor Matt that it is KIM HIMSELF that respects Matt's right to do things in his own cultural way? Why isn't it that Thais don't have to study up on how not to offend WESTERNERS? It's sort of a reverse racism to absolve them of having to do what any other enlightened culture in the world does: figure out how to make guests feel comfortable in cultural situations. The undercurrent of your exalting Thai culture is that you actually make it look as if you don't think they are capable or smart enough to do exactly what you expect a Westerner to do- adjust to, or at least meet halfway, the way other cultures handle things. You could have just as well said 'hey, it was kind of rude for Mom not to wave back!'.

Given that Matt and Kim are in a long term relationship, and Kim expects to be supported- or at least has accepted that support- why shouldn't he set aside his cultural instincts and try to respond to Matt as he needs him to? And why do the few of you who think you know everything about Thai-Western relationships really think there's any one way to do it? Some of it may be generational too. You older guys come from a completely different background and era than Matt does. There may be a huge difference in your respective approaches to Thai partners.

If the shoe was on the other foot, and Kim was living with Matt in Canada, would you expect that Kim abandon all Thai customs and mimic only those of Matt's culture? And wouldn't asking him to do that be the worst kind of cultural insensitivity? Living here, Matt shouldn't be treated like an idiot because he expects Kim to respect his ways too.

Having said all that, I truly love all the Thai customs and do my best to fit in eagerly. I don't think it's fair to have relationships be so one sided that you have a commentator actually stating that it's okay for Kim not to want to help Matt with his Thai. Making sure his partner's language skills are coming along will allow them to communicate even better. If he is made to understand that, I'm betting he'd be more motivated. If he isn't, well, that's a red flag.

[Thai Dyed]

You can ENTER a long-term relationship with someone and it can be a month, 3 months, 9 months, 15 years along. Matt clearly is indicating that he and Kim have entered into one. .

You can call something anything you like. Certainly don't let me inhibit you! But remember that the moment anyone stops clapping that Tinker Bell will die.

тАЬTinker Bell is going to die because not enough people believe in fairies. But if all of you clap your hands real hard to show that you do believe in fairies, maybe she wonтАЩt die.тАЭ
тАЬThat wasnтАЩt enough. You did not clap hard enough. Tinker Bell is dead.тАЭ
- Peter Pan, Act II

[attachment=0:2iz6xhb4]Death of Tinker Bell.jpg[/attachment:2iz6xhb4]

You can call something anything you like. Certainly don't let me inhibit you! But remember that the moment anyone stops clapping that Tinker Bell will die.

My point exactly...put another way, would you say two newlyweds are not in a long term relationship???? Commitment is what matters, not the number of months or years you build up. Longevity for longevity's sake is a shitty way to define 'long term relationship'.

May Tinkerbell never die...

How about "long term transaction"?

Projected long-term relationship and/or projected long-term transaction.

[Beachlover]

READING EXERCISE FOR PROMISING BOYFRIEND MATERIAL

The cnuerrt wetar leevl on the mniatresam Moenkg Rveir is snfiiicaltngy bolew aervage in Nrorehtn Lao PDR and Tlinhaad. Lelevs at mtsaieanrm minaresug sonittas at Cnhaig Sean, Caihng Kahn, Laung Parbnag, Viiaetnne and Nnog Kahi are beolw thsoe taht oueccrrd in the low folw saseon of 1993, whcih floelwod the msot emertxe roianegl drhguot on rocred in 1992.

The iialtpcmions of tehse low wtear lelves are sireous for the plpeoe of Nteorhrn Lao PDR and Tianlhad. Sveree drouhgt wlil hvae an impcat on atrcuglirue, food setricuy, acsces to celan wtaer and rievr tsraorpnt and wlil acffet the eiocomnc dnepelvmoet of ppoele alardey fcniag siroeus pveorty. The nhtroern picvoners are aosgnmt the psreoot araes for btoh Lao PDR and Thlaanid.

Rveir tuor orrtpaeos hvae seoptpd oirneffg sveiecrs on the settcrh of rveir bewteen Hausieoy and Lunag Pabrang in Loas and it has been rrtpeoed taht Yaunn piirvnaocl attehuriois hvae hateld the oreitapon of Cihnese cgaro btoas wchih wlil acfeft riageonl tadre. The Naaointl Cnrete for Emtonninvearl Haelth and Waetr Splupy in Lao PDR has stteard aiidsnvg pploee to coetnur the eefctfs of dogrhut by runeicdg wtaer ctinoumospn.


You do realise that, In England, you can now get an "A" level in English for displaying that level of proficiency.

Hey... that's actually easier to read than what LMTU posts... seriously.

[Beachlover]

Yeah but is Matt even paying Kim that 1,000/day or 30k/month still?

I thought it had been wound back to just some reasonable spending/pocket money and living expenses. 200 baht shirts and such.

I think it's more likely Kim actually likes him and such since the age difference is so much less... only 8 years instead of 20 or 30 years.

But Matt, don't underestimate the appeal/value of what you have done for him and how it might influence his behaviour to you relative to his true feelings. He's lived this life of complete uncertainty... no security... no stability... always on the edge of poverty wondering where he's going to eat/sleep next. All of a sudden someone's taken him in, taken this enormous weight off his shoulders and given him stability. Surely he will do anything to keep that and make you happy.

... always on the edge of poverty wondering where he's going to eat/sleep next. All of a sudden someone's taken him in, taken this enormous weight off his shoulders and given him stability. Surely he will do anything to keep that and make you happy.
How very na├пve you are

Same goes with learning Thai. Apparently, the entire Thai language is up to me too. I'm not sure if he's too lazy to correct me, or if he just doesn't like telling me I'm wrong. When he can't understand what I'm saying though, alot of times he'll simply look at the Thai script in whatever book I'm learning from to figure out what I'm saying. Then instead of correcting me, he'll simply remember whatever new word I just made up, and go with that from then on in. I guess he thinks that's a much better method, then actually teaching me correct pronounciation.

Matt, I really can't be bothered to comment any more as there isn't much point - as Smiles said, if its not what you want to hear then there's something wrong with those replying.

The only thing I would say is that whatever books you are reading on the Thai language just aren't working. Calling a waiter "nong" (or "phii") and calling a village a "moo baan" here isn't blending in oir progressing, its being pretentious and a little childish. You've been together 9 months (off and on), you're living in Thailand, he spoke virtually no English when you met, he hasn't studied any English since, yet the only language you can communicate in effectively is English - either he doesn't want you to learn Thai (not too unusual), he can't be bothered to help as it isn't that important to him, or the teacher/student bit simply isn't his thing. You are in Thailand: you don't need to use books - do yourself a favour and get a teacher.

[cdnmatt]

Matt, I really can't be bothered to comment any more as there isn't much point - as Smiles said, if its not what you want to hear then there's something wrong with those replying.

Well, that's the thing... I wasn't looking for relationship advice or anything. I was just kinda poking a bit of fun at some aspects of my current life, and by no means angry at them. I was kinda hoping to spur replies like, "Ohhh, you think that's bad? My guy does this...", or maybe, "I offed a guy onetime, and this happened...".

Obviously, that didn't work out too well though. Oh well, shit happens, life goes on. :-)


Yeah but is Matt even paying Kim that 1,000/day or 30k/month still?

I feel like an idiot answering this one, but no, he's not on some allowance anymore. I don't know how much we spend as I don't keep track, but I know it's dirt cheap, and we live like kings, and have everything we need and want. We just have our account together, I always make sure there's money in it, and that's our daily living money. It's great this way, because Kim pays almost all the check-bin's now, etc. We both like it that way, plus I love seeing the wait staff's face when they bring the check-bin, and Kim reaches for his wallet. :-)

[Brad the Impala]

How about "long term transaction"?

Still just being sarcastic without stereotyping?

[quote="Fuck-Face":eg3204h7]How about "long term transaction"?

Still just being sarcastic without stereotyping?[/quote:eg3204h7]

Is it still "stereotyping" when it is true 9,999 out of 10,000 times?

[martin911]

Matt

Sounds like your having a ball up there whatever way your looking at it -and i hope you keep on enjoying it
Is it not such a great privelage from our point of view ??-a stranger to these shores ,living with a partner,meeting their family,experiencing their way off life
this you do not get merely picking up a guide book at the airport upon arrival !!!!!!!!!!
I was thinking this last sunday in the taxi looking at the face of my own special guy on the way back from a fun filled weekend in bangkok -we had a ball with mutual friends , and brought 1 or 2 home with us from God /Gstar ( depending on the night )--just honest drunken horny sex,no money involved --Cannot beat this haha
I have had so many wonderfull times with this guy over the last 10 months (we stay together )but to be frank i wouldnt share them on this board (i did once and got accused of molestion !!)--too many detracters that dont seem to like hearing good time tales
Prob because you are closer in age to your guy (like myself )than most is why you seem to enjoy him so much --as i said its an absloute privelage to meet a genuine guy (and they do exsist )--all the other stuff like whether you should look at a monk etc is all part of enjoying a totally different life -- keep on enjoying it --your posts are worth reading-never mind the moaners
Cheers

Matt, I really can't be bothered to comment any more as there isn't much point - as Smiles said, if its not what you want to hear then there's something wrong with those replying.

The only thing I would say is that whatever books you are reading on the Thai language just aren't working. Calling a waiter "nong" (or "phii") and calling a village a "moo baan" here isn't blending in oir progressing, its being pretentious and a little childish. You've been together 9 months (off and on), you're living in Thailand, he spoke virtually no English when you met, he hasn't studied any English since, yet the only language you can communicate in effectively is English - either he doesn't want you to learn Thai (not too unusual), he can't be bothered to help as it isn't that important to him, or the teacher/student bit simply isn't his thing. You are in Thailand: you don't need to use books - do yourself a favour and get a teacher.

I think GF's advice and the way he offered it was what Matt had in mind when he opened this thread in the first place. Constructive and entirely non-judgmental.

[Impulse]

Yeah but is Matt even paying Kim that 1,000/day or 30k/month still?

I thought it had been wound back to just some reasonable spending/pocket money and living expenses. 200 baht shirts and such.

I think it's more likely Kim actually likes him and such since the age difference is so much less... only 8 years instead of 20 or 30 years.

But Matt, don't underestimate the appeal/value of what you have done for him and how it might influence his behaviour to you relative to his true feelings. He's lived this life of complete uncertainty... no security... no stability... always on the edge of poverty wondering where he's going to eat/sleep next. All of a sudden someone's taken him in, taken this enormous weight off his shoulders and given him stability. Surely he will do anything to keep that and make you happy. This was a great post,as well as jacklipton's. I admire Matt for going head long into a relationship. Would you be happier if Matt was a butterfly? In fact,most butterflies owe Matt a debt of gratitude,as the only reason(besides the money),these thai bois come to Pattaya is the dream of landing a young rich farang.Am I right?

the only reason(besides the money),these thai bois come to Pattaya is the dream of landing a young rich farang.Am I right?

That's a single reason.

[kittyboy]

A long term relationship may be relative.

For some tourists to thailand a short term relationship is 90 minutes and 1000 baht... by comparison 9 months is a long term commitment.

Many defintions are up to the person using the term.

Good luck with your thai friend.

[Marsilius]

...the only reason(besides the money),these thai bois come to Pattaya is the dream of landing a young rich farang.Am I right?

Surely it's the dream of landing an old rich farang - after all, they'll die sooner and leave the boy the inheritance!

...the only reason(besides the money),these thai bois come to Pattaya is the dream of landing a young rich farang.Am I right?

Surely it's the dream of landing an old rich farang - after all, they'll die sooner and leave the boy the inheritance!

Yes...just ask Khun Punya of Howard's and Sansuk fame about that.

[Beachlover]

Doesn't sound like anyone else has had any funny "up to you" stories...

Is this a thread about "up to you" or "up you"?

[cdnmatt]

Surely it's the dream of landing an old rich farang - after all, they'll die sooner and leave the boy the inheritance!

I don't get it, why can't some (most?) of you guys comprehend the fact that maybe the Thai does genuinely want to be in a relationship with a farang, and doesn't just view it as work, or a career move? That maybe he does genuinely enjoy the time you spend together, has become very emotionally attached to you, and isn't just going through the phases to get money?

Maybe he's had a rough, poverty stricken life, and enjoys the new world-view the farang brings where a 250 baht meal, or a 500 baht/night hotel isn't considered expensive. Maybe he's not actually greedy, and instead of constantly asking for this or that, enjoys the simple freedom of being able to eat whenever and whatever he wants, or being able to buy a 200 baht shirt or 100 baht change jar at the whim of an impulse.

Or maybe through his experiences in life, he's now under the impression that all Thai guys around his age are lieing, thieving bastards, and is completely turned off by the prospect of having a relationship with one. Maybe he enjoys being in a relationship that's upfront and honest, and has decided being with a farang is the best chance to have that.

Or maybe he enjoys the fact that it's something completely different and new for him, and enjoys being able to learn and teach each other's language and culture.

[Beachlover]

Maybe he likes you and thinks you have a good heart.

[PeterUK]

Doesn't sound like anyone else has had any funny "up to you" stories...

I asked my Thai friend if he wanted to ascend to the temple on Doi Suthep in the funicular cable-car or climb the steps on foot. 'Up to you', he said.

Why do you want board members to answer a question that only you can answer? You and no one else should know how your relationship is going without looking for comments from more or less complete strangers.

[Beachlover]

I don't think he was asking for advise in his OP. He was just opening an invitation for anyone with similar stories and anecdotes.

Nobody can be sure they are right, really... members are too far away to make sound judgement and cdnmatt may be too close and lacking an objective perspective to be completely sure of seeing the truth.

[Brad the Impala]

Surely it's the dream of landing an old rich farang - after all, they'll die sooner and leave the boy the inheritance!

I don't get it, why can't some (most?) of you guys comprehend the fact that maybe the Thai does genuinely want to be in a relationship with a farang, and doesn't just view it as work, or a career move? That maybe he does genuinely enjoy the time you spend together, has become very emotionally attached to you, and isn't just going through the phases to get money?



I have been wondering about that too. I think that the problem that these guys have is that because it didn't happen to them, or they didn't realise when it did happen to them, that they don't believe it can happen to anyone else. To accept your relationship, especially at a relatively young age, as valid and real, rather than as a "transaction", would mean rewriting their whole jaded view of life, and accepting that maybe there were missed opportunities in their own past.

Over the years, I have heard a number of times the confusion of rich farangs when their boyfriend leaves them. "He could have had everything if he had stayed with me. He would have been a rich man when I died". They make sense of what happened by rationalizing that their boyfriend was too stupid or unworldly to appreciate their wonderful situation. It never seems to occur that it just wasn't possible to buy someone's soul, and that their boyfriend actually needed a relationship that gave them more than material wealth and being a rich man's toy boy.

[cdnmatt]

Why do you want board members to answer a question that only you can answer?

Read the original post. I wasn't asking a question. I was just trying to make banter, but a bunch of bitchy, old queens got their hands on the thread instead.

Besides, I don't like working, but I should probably look busy, so bugging you guys is more fun. :-)

I have been wondering about that too. I think that the problem that these guys have is that because it didn't happen to them, or they didn't realise when it did happen to them, that they don't believe it can happen to anyone else. To accept your relationship, especially at a relatively young age, as valid and real, rather than as a "transaction", would mean rewriting their whole jaded view of life, and accepting that maybe there were missed opportunities in their own past.

Over the years, I have heard a number of times the confusion of rich farangs when their boyfriend leaves them. "He could have had everything if he had stayed with me. He would have been a rich man when I died". They make sense of what happened by rationalizing that their boyfriend was too stupid or unworldly to appreciate their wonderful situation. It never seems to occur that it just wasn't possible to buy someone's soul, and that their boyfriend actually needed a relationship that gave them more than material wealth and being a rich man's toy boy.


Who needs the biblical Solomon when we have SGT members



:dontknow: :dontknow: :dontknow:

[Marsilius wrote something]


I don't get it
[X] Because you failed to notice the italicized adjective.

Why do you want board members to answer a question that only you can answer?

Read the original post. I wasn't asking a question. I was just trying to make banter, but a bunch of bitchy, old queens got their hands on the thread instead.

Besides, I don't like working, but I should probably look busy, so bugging you guys is more fun. :-)

My God it must really be bugging you if you have to bitch posters out for making a few comments. Perhaps that's why your bf finds it easier to respond with "It's up to you" as it makes his life easier then getting into a confrontation if he actually gave his view on the matter.......!!!!!!!!

I thought the original post was created whimsically wondering about some things Matt found odd in his relationship with Kim. He clearly stated that he hoped it would prod other members to share similar stories...of which they COULD have, but they decided it would be more fun to unzip and give him a golden shower that has lasted four pages now.

Don't ANY of you old fogies have ANY anecdotal stories about your relationships that left you confused and puzzled by the behavior of your better (Thai) half? Some of you go back 10-15 years, before this new internet-savvy generation took over. Smiles, you mentioned to me how you tried to get your guy to cut his hair a certain way and he's never budged. Yedo's sweetie must have given him some pause during his university days, so let's hear them.

Why don't we pick this thread up a bit by honoring Matt's original intent? Would be interesting...

[martin911]

Surely it's the dream of landing an old rich farang - after all, they'll die sooner and leave the boy the inheritance!

I don't get it, why can't some (most?) of you guys comprehend the fact that maybe the Thai does genuinely want to be in a relationship with a farang, and doesn't just view it as work, or a career move? That maybe he does genuinely enjoy the time you spend together, has become very emotionally attached to you, and isn't just going through the phases to get money?

Maybe he's had a rough, poverty stricken life, and enjoys the new world-view the farang brings where a 250 baht meal, or a 500 baht/night hotel isn't considered expensive. Maybe he's not actually greedy, and instead of constantly asking for this or that, enjoys the simple freedom of being able to eat whenever and whatever he wants, or being able to buy a 200 baht shirt or 100 baht change jar at the whim of an impulse.

Or maybe through his experiences in life, he's now under the impression that all Thai guys around his age are lieing, thieving bastards, and is completely turned off by the prospect of having a relationship with one. Maybe he enjoys being in a relationship that's upfront and honest, and has decided being with a farang is the best chance to have that.

Or maybe he enjoys the fact that it's something completely different and new for him, and enjoys being able to learn and teach each other's language and culture.

Exactly --whats so strange that 2 people even from differing backgrounds cannot hit it off together (even in Thailand)--happens all over the world
I wouldnt trade the last 10 months i have spent with my special guy for anything,all the fun ,new experiences, laughter(and boy does he make me laugh every day )we have shared -and i have no doubt he is getting as much out of as i am --as i said yesterday its an absolute privelage to get to know these guys properly

I don't get it, why can't some (most?) of you guys comprehend the fact that maybe the Thai does genuinely want to be in a relationship with a farang, and doesn't just view it as work, or a career move? That maybe he does genuinely enjoy the time you spend together, has become very emotionally attached to you, and isn't just going through the phases to get money?

Maybe ..... Maybe ..... Or maybe .....


Matt, I think you'll find that there are a number of us in just the situation you describe, and some of us have been in that situation and living together 24/7 for a number of years, not a few days. The main differences are maybe that we didn't describe it as a long term relationship and true love after a few weeks when we were paying them 30,000 baht +++ a month to visit us occasionally, maybe we didn't consider this the usual way for all relationships to start, or maybe that it was normal for us both to be threatened with knives and in fear of our lives on a regular basis so that we had to move town, etc, etc, etc.

You are happy with your relationship as it is - good luck to you, so are many of those in what they feel are long term relationships, as are many of those who are happy with their selection of "boy specials", and many of those who are quite content to be butterflies. That doesn't make their relationships any better or any worse than yours, or them any more (or any less) " bitchy, old queens" than you are.

[Rene]

I don't get it, why can't some (most?) of you guys comprehend the fact that maybe the Thai does genuinely want to be in a relationship with a farang, and doesn't just view it as work, or a career move? That maybe he does genuinely enjoy the time you spend together, has become very emotionally attached to you, and isn't just going through the phases to get money?

Maybe ..... Maybe ..... Or maybe .....


Matt, I think you'll find that there are a number of us in just the situation you describe, and some of us have been in that situation and living together 24/7 for a number of years, not a few days. The main differences are maybe that we didn't describe it as a long term relationship and true love after a few weeks when we were paying them 30,000 baht +++ a month to visit us occasionally, maybe we didn't consider this the usual way for all relationships to start, or maybe that it was normal for us both to be threatened with knives and in fear of our lives on a regular basis so that we had to move town, etc, etc, etc.

You are happy with your relationship as it is - good luck to you, so are many of those in what they feel are long term relationships, as are many of those who are happy with their selection of "boy specials", and many of those who are quite content to be butterflies. That doesn't make their relationships any better or any worse than yours, or them any more (or any less) " bitchy, old queens" than you are.

This is an amazingly concise and articulate reply. I just wanted to write and compliment you on it Gone Fishing!

[TrongpaiExpat]

Why do you want board members to answer a question that only you can answer?

Read the original post. I wasn't asking a question. I was just trying to make banter, but a bunch of bitchy, old queens got their hands on the thread instead.

Besides, I don't like working, but I should probably look busy, so bugging you guys is more fun. :-)

What I would like to hear from you now that your living in KK is a little review of the must see sights in the area (The province) and some insights into where to go, where not to go and what's good about KK? I have just booked a resort for a 4 day stay in KK and some personal experiences would be useful.

[Marsilius]

I thought the original post was created whimsically wondering about some things Matt found odd in his relationship with Kim.

It wasn't, actually.

What it said was "Let's see if we can generate some interesting stories here. We all knows most Thais have very much have a "up to you" approach to life. Does it ever cause you problems, or get irritating at all?" It is true that the original poster then offered examples that happened to be from his ongoing personal relationship with Kim - but that was not what we were specifically asked to comment on. Hence the story that I, for one, recounted told was not focussed on how the mai pen rai attitude had affected such a relationship but its results in quite another sphere of a Thai person's interaction with a farang.

[Marsilius]

I thought the original post was created whimsically wondering about some things Matt found odd in his relationship with Kim.

It wasn't, actually.

What it said was "Let's see if we can generate some interesting stories here. We all knows most Thais have very much have a "up to you" approach to life. Does it ever cause you problems, or get irritating at all?" It is true that the original poster then offered examples that happened to be from his ongoing personal relationship with Kim - but that was not what we were specifically asked to comment on. Hence the story that I, for one, recounted told was not focussed on how the mai pen rai attitude had affected such a relationship but its results in quite another sphere of a Thai person's interaction with a farang.

This is an amazingly concise and articulate reply. I just wanted to write and compliment you on it Gone Fishing!

Rene, I'm flattered - something that seldom happens here.

I was tempted to write that if all Matt was after was a companion who was loving without reservations, genuinely enjoyed their time spent together, became very emotionally attached, wasn't after money, enjoyed nothing more than cuddling up to him in bed, and with whom he could communicate on a basic level, then most of my dogs would more than fill the bill - that may not have been appreciated by a "cat person", however!

[Art]

a companion who was loving without reservations, genuinely enjoyed their time spent together, became very emotionally attached, wasn't after money, enjoyed nothing more than cuddling up to him in bed, and with whom he could communicate on a basic level, then most of my dogs would more than fill the bill
I can hardly imagine a greater compliment for a person than to be compared with a dog. The demand for boys and girls would drop dramatically if genetic engineering created dogs with a human appearance. In most countries the discussion about the age of consent would take care of itself.



Frederick II: My dogs destroy my chairs; but how can I help it? And if I were to have them mended today, they would be torn again tomorrow. So I suppose I must bear with the inconvenience. After all, a Marquise De Pompadour would cost me a great deal more, and would neither be as attached nor as faithful.

The liquid eyes of an Italian Greyhound can melt the hardest of hearts. These little dogs are masters at twisting owners around their paws. As a result, IGs can become spoiled-rotten rapidly and can turn into rulers of the house! Don't forget to teach them what "no" means. However, they do prefer to be companion and friend, but not master and dog. If an Italian Greyhound captures your heart, you will find that the process is painless and you will become a willing slave. If you are looking for a breed that will obey your every command, the IG is NOT the breed for you.

You must remember that their dreamy expression hides a deadly mind. They are very adept at getting what they want and can be persistent. Be prepared to give in on many issues because they are masters at laying a guilt trip! If you are not flexible this also may not be the breed for you.

Lounging in beds, preferably under covers is a favorite pastime. Sharing the bed with you is always the best! Some are very good at sneaking under covers. Others, who have learned to enslave everyone, are good at teaching owners to gently pick the covers up for them! Keeping the couch warm occupies a lot of their time. Care must be taken to not sit on a hidden IG! If you don't like sharing your bed, this may not be the breed for you.

Your privacy will be a long forgotten memory once you are owned by an IG! You will find that no where in your house is there a place to hide from this inquisitive little personality. You will be followed everywhere... including the bathroom. Dinner time is of special interest to IGs. Care should be taken in not tripping over them. If you do not like constant company, an IG may not be the breed for you.

IG's can be very possessive of their owners and I've known many owners who occasionally resist this possessiveness. No matter what you are doing, the IG may demand inmmediate attention. For example, iggies have been known to interrupt romantic interludes. If you do not have a good sense of humor, the IG may NOT be the breed for you.
(Source: http://www.italian-greyhound.net/FRAMEABOUT.HTM)

http://www.encore-editions.com/dogs/dogs/hutch/thm_1835playfulitaliangreyhounds.jpg

[The gay] Friedrich may not have been much of a womanizer, but he certainly was a dog-izer. Since early childhood, Friedrich had a passion for dogs. As King, although he valued a variety of dogs for different purposes such as the Russian dogs he used as messengers in his army, he especially loved small Italian Greyhounds for his own companionship. Throughout his life, he had about sixty dogs, of which at least thirty were grey-hounds and most were females.

The theologian and geographer Friedrich Anton B├╝sching wrote that Friedrich consistently had three or four dogs with him, one of them usually his favorite, and Friedrich often kissed the dogs, petted them and even allowed his favorites on his bed to sleep with him. In the morning the other dogs would come racing and tumbling in to greet the King and all was a scene of happy pandemonium. The King often gave them scraps from his hands at the dining table and they sat next to him on the terrace. It was a known fact that woe would be upon anyone that the King caught misusing a dog. Friedrich seemed to like dogs better than people. Aside from his famous quote: "The more I see of mankind, the more I like my dog", he also once said, "Dogs are better and truer than mankind, and the so-called images of God could learn a great deal from them!" They brought Friedrich endless enjoyment and fun.

When she died in 1752, exactly one year after the death of his friend von Rothenburg, the King wrote to his sister on December 29: "I have lost Biche, and her death has reawakened in me the loss of all my friends, particularly of him who gave her to me. I was ashamed that a dog could so deeply affect my soul; but the sedentary life I lead and the faithfulness of this poor creature had so strongly attached me to her, her suffering so moved me, that, I confess, I am sad and afflicted. Does one have to be hard? Must one be insensitive? I believe that anyone capable of indifference towards a faithful animal is unable to be grateful towards an equal, and that, if one must choose, it is best to be too sensitive than too hard."

Thirty years after Biche's death, Friedrich was still very attached to his dogs. When his beloved dog Thisbe died in 1783, Frederick wrote sadly, "One might be surprised how an old man like me could loose his heart to a little dog. For fourteen years, Thisbe was my companion, and whenever I couldn't sleep at night, she laid next to me and watched me as if she was a concerned human being. I'll never forget her eyes!" (Source: http://www.exulanten.com/dog.html)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Intelligence_of_Dogs

[Surfcrest]

This is an amazingly concise and articulate reply. I just wanted to write and compliment you on it Gone Fishing!
Oh, I think ReneтАЩs being just a bit facetious with his post here. Check his posting history, youтАЩll find that heтАЩs not quite playing with a full deckтАжor more probable is another character in the same book that brought you Copper Pheel, Art, HominternтАжтАж.

Funny how when Copper Pheel is quiet the usual band of merry men spring back to life.


Sanook and Gone Fishing would have us write only about politically correct issues and ignore that reality takes place outside of the little boxes they seem to occupy. That they live in such cramped and dogmatic spaces doesn't bother me half so much as their demand that everyone join them in their pathetic and circumscribed lives.

I'm flattered - something that seldom happens here.
They are great posts though Gone Fishing, thank you very much!

[Rene]

This is an amazingly concise and articulate reply. I just wanted to write and compliment you on it Gone Fishing!
Oh, I think ReneтАЩs being just a bit facetious with his post here. Check his posting history, youтАЩll find that heтАЩs not quite playing with a full deckтАжor more probable is another character in the same book that brought you Copper Pheel, Art, HominternтАжтАж.

Funny how when Copper Pheel is quiet the usual band of merry men spring back to life.


Sanook and Gone Fishing would have us write only about politically correct issues and ignore that reality takes place outside of the little boxes they seem to occupy. That they live in such cramped and dogmatic spaces doesn't bother me half so much as their demand that everyone join them in their pathetic and circumscribed lives.

I'm flattered - something that seldom happens here.
They are great posts though Gone Fishing, thank you very much!

I am flattered that you have honored me by lumping me together with Copper Pheel, Art and Homintern! That you would take the time to search through all my old posts, lingering on each word I have written, speaks worlds about the deep seated love you have for every statement I have made and how seriously you have pondered them.

My compliment to Gone Fishing was quite genuine and sincere. Additionally I feel no compulsion to be consistent in anything in my life, least of all in what I write. It is an immediate response, like a casual conversation, and sometimes just for fun to stick pins in the fragile egos of our "normal" poofs here, such as you Surfcrest. I am not here writing a Ph.D. dissertation even if you wish to take it as such.

Have fun trawling my posts Surfcrest. It is high praise indeed!

[Surfcrest]

I am flattered that....blah blah blah blah..That you would take the time to search through all my old posts

All your old posts added up to 38 when I responded, taking me....5 minutes tops.



Additionally I feel no compulsion to be consistent in anything in my life, least of all in what I write. It is an immediate response, like a casual conversation, and sometimes just for fun to stick pins in the fragile egos of our "normal" poofs here, such as you Surfcrest. I am not here writing a Ph.D. dissertation even if you wish to take it as such.

Have fun trawling my posts Surfcrest. It is high praise indeed!

Go deep with that fragile ego of mine old man! Easy to see by the terms you use what other posters we know you as........

[Beachlover]

Is it possible homintern has had more handles than LMTU?

[Thai Dyed]

I am flattered that....blah blah blah blah..That you would take the time to search through all my old posts

All your old posts added up to 38 when I responded, taking me....5 minutes tops.



Additionally I feel no compulsion to be consistent in anything in my life, least of all in what I write. It is an immediate response, like a casual conversation, and sometimes just for fun to stick pins in the fragile egos of our "normal" poofs here, such as you Surfcrest. I am not here writing a Ph.D. dissertation even if you wish to take it as such.

Have fun trawling my posts Surfcrest. It is high praise indeed!

Go deep with that fragile ego of mine old man! Easy to see by the terms you use what other posters we know you as........

Wow! Surfcrest is really Inspector Clouseau hot on the trail of Rene's cat!
[attachment=0:1mskh132]Surfcrest tracking Rene.jpg[/attachment:1mskh132]

On the original subject of "interesting stories" about ["/i]a little too much "up to you" attitude[/i]" I coudn't help noticing the recent story of the farang who left it "up to you" for his Thai b/f to choose what they ate, who not only didn't know what he was going to eat, but didn't know what he had just eaten.


Whatever, its got be be a rather less nauseous repast than the self-indulgent drone of "he loves me ..... he really loves me ..... I know he loves me ..... its true love ..... he loves me ..... its not about money ..... did I mention that he loves me? ....."

[cdnmatt]

On the original subject of "interesting stories" about ["/i]a little too much "up to you" attitude[/i]" I coudn't help noticing the recent story of the farang who left it "up to you" for his Thai b/f to choose what they ate, who not only didn't know what he was going to eat, but didn't know what he had just eaten.

GF, I'll eat however the fuck I want, thank you. And if that includes letting Kim choose what to order, so be it.


Whatever, its got be be a rather less nauseous repast than the self-indulgent drone of "he loves me ..... he really loves me ..... I know he loves me ..... its true love ..... he loves me ..... its not about money ..... did I mention that he loves me? ....."

My apologies, great one. I'll try to emulate you in the future, and will do my utmost to become as bitchy as possible. I hope I live up to your standards. :-)

[kittyboy]

I had the opposite of the "up to you problem"...My thai friend actually had a preference and I went along.

I have been hanging out with Ken for the last couple of trips to the LOS. A real nice guy.
We generally go out for simple meals in the evening....nothing fancy as I really like basic thai food.
Near the end of my trip I asked him if I could take him, his roommate and a couple of their frieds out to dinner..Sure no problem...I told Ken to pick the place...sure no problem...I had no idea that thai boys loved expensive sushi so much :)
They set me back close to 4000 baht. Where do those skinny little things pack all that food? Anyway I laughed so hard...I suspect that "up to you" may hide some pretty expensive tastes...just waiting to emerge.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I assumed that Rene was one of GF's multiple personalities flaring up and stroking the ego of the host body...Of course I could be wrong....unlike some members of this board who shall remain un-named I am humble enough to admit the possiblity of being wrong though the occurance is rare.




I am flattered that....blah blah blah blah..That you would take the time to search through all my old posts

All your old posts added up to 38 when I responded, taking me....5 minutes tops.



Additionally I feel no compulsion to be consistent in anything in my life, least of all in what I write. It is an immediate response, like a casual conversation, and sometimes just for fun to stick pins in the fragile egos of our "normal" poofs here, such as you Surfcrest. I am not here writing a Ph.D. dissertation even if you wish to take it as such.

Have fun trawling my posts Surfcrest. It is high praise indeed!

Go deep with that fragile ego of mine old man! Easy to see by the terms you use what other posters we know you as........

GF, I'll eat however the fuck I want, thank you.

No reason why the fuck you shouldn't - but maybe you are addressing the wrong person.

[Beachlover]

GF, I'll eat however the fuck I want, thank you.

No reason why the fuck you shouldn't - but maybe you are addressing the wrong person.

No, there's only one f*ckstick here he's addressing, GF.

I had no idea that thai boys loved expensive sushi so much :)
They set me back close to 4000 baht. Where do those skinny little things pack all that food?

I was in Chiang Mai a few months ago and saw a sushi train. Fantastic, I thought, I love sushi train.

Walked in, the lady asks me if I'm sure I want to be there, of course I am I say. I ask how much per plate... 240 baht. At the time, that was around $AU9 - more than twice what you'd pay at a good place in Sydney. Needless to say, I hightailed it out of there. If I hadn't asked, I could easily have put away 2000 baht worth just by myself.

A few days later, a Thai friend took me to one of the Fuji chain restaurants in Siam Paragon. I had a pretty good set for under 200 baht, including a decent sized serving of salmon.

I suppose it all depends where you go....

[Brad the Impala]

A few days later, a Thai friend took me to one of the Fuji chain restaurants in Siam Paragon. I had a pretty good set for under 200 baht, including a decent sized serving of salmon.

I suppose it all depends where you go....

Fuji is definitely my favourite chain restaurant in Thailand with consistent quality and value, and generally pretty efficient service. Actually it is the only chain restaurant that I have been to on more than a rare occasion.

I had no idea that thai boys loved expensive sushi so much :)
They set me back close to 4000 baht. Where do those skinny little things pack all that food?

I was in Chiang Mai a few months ago and saw a sushi train. Fantastic, I thought, I love sushi train.

Walked in, the lady asks me if I'm sure I want to be there, of course I am I say. I ask how much per plate... 240 baht. At the time, that was around $AU9 - more than twice what you'd pay at a good place in Sydney. Needless to say, I hightailed it out of there. If I hadn't asked, I could easily have put away 2000 baht worth just by myself.

A few days later, a Thai friend took me to one of the Fuji chain restaurants in Siam Paragon. I had a pretty good set for under 200 baht, including a decent sized serving of salmon.

I suppose it all depends where you go....

Chiang Mai is a long way from the ocean, but it doesn't justify that kind of price! I believe it only costs about 20 Baht per kilo (for small quantities) to send cargo from Bangkok to Chiang Mai by air so it is not expensive to source fresh fish.

As for Fuji, yes it's great value especially at lunch-time... Zen is nice too, maybe a little pricier but a vast menu - we were each given five different menus once! (including the 50 page a-la-carte menu) . I used to recommend the Oishi Grand Japanese buffet at Siam Discovery... the price has increased a few times recently, but the quality varies. It's worth going early at 11.30 before it gets busy with greedy Thai and Chinese types (can be amusing watching the old couples berating each other... "Don't fill up on rice and soup! Only go for the most expensive dishes!").

The Shabushi buffet is fun too, but watch out for the time limit! It's a kind of hybrid concept of the sushi train and the Thai/Korean Hot Pot... there is a conveyor-belt with sushi dishes, but also plates of raw meat and vegetables which you cook at your own table. It's really popular with the Thais so you normally have to queue to get in.

We recently discovered a little place in Siam Square called Kin Ramen, where you can order anything you like from the menu for 350 Baht a head... I guess you could call it an a-la-carte buffet. Exclusively staffed by audacious effeminate gay men, I'm sure most of you gentleman would enjoy a visit :thumbleft: .