got assaulted by boyfriend friends while he was cheering them...

[Oliver]

To be fair, the guy seems isolated. My impression is that he was seeking support and sympathy and already knew what he must do. Perhaps he was unaware that other gay forums may well have provided a more receptive platform. Let's be honest, this one can be a little....how can I put this politely.....aggressive?

[BOY69]

The cause of disbelief is that he was asking for advice. Any rational person who was the object of such an incredibly outrageous attack by his bf and friends, would know that the only option would be to cut all ties and move on. No need to solicit the advice of people in a forum.

That's correct indeed but I think he loves him and it was difficult for him to cut the relationship immediately.

[fountainhall]

I fully agree that love can often be confusing and those in love can indeed be blind to what others see as the obvious. However,

1. if you really believe your boyfriend/lover truly loves you, and
2. you get into what seems to have been a serious a fight with "10 or more" of his friends during which you are punched, beaten and bottles may have been thrown for 5 minutes, and
3. during all this pugilism he is doing nothing to ensure no harm comes to you but he is actually egging on his friends and also shouting at you and punching you as stated in the OP,

it doesn't matter to me if he was stone cold sober, very drunk or high on some form of drugs, the only sensible action is to drop him - immediately. I cannot see how such a major rift could ever be repaired. And as others have stated, if it happens once, it can happen again . . . and again . . . and . . . Life is too short.

[fountainhall]

Let's be honest, this one can be a little....how can I put this politely.....aggressive?

Whilst not disagreeing with you, I wonder if you have read gaythailand recently. It has had quite a few on-going ding-dongs recently with a lot more posters banned than in this gentleman's forum!

[bobsaigon2]

Oh yes, Love. I forgot to consider that as a mitigating factor in the OP's indecisiveness. It's been so long. Forgot the last time I was in love.

Oliver provided one reason for the contents of the OP: "To be fair, the guy seems isolated. My impression is that he was seeking support and sympathy and already knew what he must do."

And I found this to be a somewhat fitting description of more than one board member.

[Surfcrest]

Since you have raised the issue, I regret I have to bring up the matter of sglad where his troll-like status was very quickly raised by several posters (not by me, though - I kept my suspicions to myself). Later, when he began to make obvious errors and started throwing out insults to other posters, I wrote to you and Moses to the effect that I believed he had to be a troll - that there was no possibility of his being a young Singaporean student studying in Chiang Mai, and I provided specific reasoning based on my having lived in a Chinese society for two decades. That sms was sent on February 5. Moses kindly replied. Without betraying a confidence, that was merely re technical issues. So the sglad hydra was permitted to continue posting for a further 14 days, spreading more and more lies and unsubtle vitriol until I set the trap which outed him and his hydra partner sugar daddy. You then finally banned him.

With the greatest respect, detective work on content did pick up his troll/hydra status but moderation waited a further two weeks before taking any action. Had I not set the trap, I'm pretty certain that sugardaddy would have stayed out of the picture and, for all we know, sglad might still be posting here. So there is definitely an issue - and perhaps even a conflict – between posters who are identifiable by technical means and those by content, posters who simply lie and then build on that lie to target other posters.
.

The sglad / sugargrandpa case was quite different. For all I know, they may have been two separate and legit members. Something was flagged to my attention with respect to their posting activity and rather than doing a complete investigation into what it was, I thought it best to sever the ties rather than to comb through it. There just was too much to go through and too much happening that seemed off, with respect to each of their posts. I figured that if either was legit, they'd come back...which it appears, neither has.

While I do get PM's from time to time about this member or that, from that member or this...I generally don't use that as a guideline. There are more technical means that are completely unbiased to what I or anyone else, might suspect.

Surfcrest

[fountainhall]

While I do get PM's from time to time about this member or that, from that member or this...I generally don't use that as a guideline. There are more technical means that are completely unbiased to what I or anyone else, might suspect.

Surfcrest

That I perfectly understand. But if content is not considered and a poster is not in fact a hydra but merely a troll trying to cause some form of havoc, can technical means alone root him out - despite alerts from members? I am merely curious - because I do think it is an important issue. A group of posters was recently banned on gaythailand. From what I gather (and I may be wrong), it seems it was what the filth they wrote that triggered the bans and not a technical issue.

[fountainhall]

Oh yes, Love. I forgot to consider that as a mitigating factor in the OP's indecisiveness. It's been so long. Forgot the last time I was in love

I believe anyone can find love (although I'm not so sure that actually works in the UK after a certain age - can't speak about other western countries). Of course for many guys occasional or regular sex is fine. But surely with so many Asian guys looking for much older westerners it's possible where you live?

[bobsaigon2]

I also forget the last time I wanted to be in love. Life (for me) is so much more care free as a free agent.

[Brad the Impala]

That I perfectly understand. But if content is not considered and a poster is not in fact a hydra but merely a troll trying to cause some form of havoc, can technical means alone root him out - despite alerts from members? I am merely curious - because I do think it is an important issue. A group of posters was recently banned on gaythailand. From what I gather (and I may be wrong), it seems it was what the filth they wrote that triggered the bans and not a technical issue.

Oh come on. The last thing this forum needs is another Soapbox Sally!